Memory Tainted
by Syra Saleh
Summary: When another mysterious Defense teacher comes to Hogwarts, Severus takes it upon himself to monitor her every move. Very soon, he finds this sarcastic and witty teacher to be something other than what he expected... an equal. AN.
1. First Impressions Always Last

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Chapter One: First Impressions Always Last

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Raining again. It's always bloody rains when I travel on foot. Cassandra Talin trudged along the soaked dirt path that wound through the forest, clouds swirling above her, their gray drizzle drenching her cloak. _What a wonderful first impression I'm going to make, I hope he likes his teachers wet._

Farther and farther she walked in her silent reverie, staring hard at the ground. This was something of her last resort, something she wasn't comfortable with, but would have to do. She had no job now, and had been barely making ends meet for as long as she could remember. This job offered her shelter and food, along with a mildly interesting subject, Defense Against the Dark Arts. If she did not get the job, she was back in the city working multiple jobs again.

Finally, a misty shadow was visible in the distance, looming off in the gray horizon. There stood an impressively large castle positioned near a black lake. It was enough to make one sharply intake breath; the castle sat proudly in the edge of a forest, but seemed to look just as mysterious as the depths of the forest itself. Cassandra stood at the edge of the forest, looking up at it for a moment, stunned. Then she shook herself slightly and began to make her way to the front of the castle. She came to a gate flanked by two stone boars on prestigious stone pillars, and she pushed the iron gate open just enough to slip through it, now walking a gravel path. Her legs were growing weary from the walking, and the rain had seemed to chill her to the bone. She shivered slightly, but told herself to stop it, shivering was a sign of weakness. She lifted her head and watched the giant wooden doors grow larger, beckoning her to open them.

Cassandra breathed in deeply as she reached the large entrance of the castle, unsure of whether she should knock or if she should just go in and seek out the headmaster herself. But before she could make that decision, a wooden door pushed itself open from inside and out walked a tall, dark man dressed in a heavy black cloak. She stepped back and bowed her head instinctively, as if attempting to become invisible or at least unimportant to the figure. 

He was in the midst of pulling his hood over his shoulder-length black hair when he spotted a dark hooded figure standing off to the side. His cold dark eyes swept over the person, taking in very little as they were so heavily cloaked.

"Are you here for the Defense Against the Dark Arts position?" asked Severus Snape gruffly as he pulled the hood over his head. He had never liked a single Defense teacher to date, all were useless or troublesome, but he never said a word about the appointments, as he was here by Albus Dumbledore's grace as well.

"Yes, I am," said the figure, lifting their head slightly to look at the person. Severus went blank; it was a woman (unlike the last few), and her accent was familiar, an odd but pleasant blend of proper English with a faint Russian purr. Severus soon recovered from his momentary shock, and he searched her face vainly for some sort of hint at who she reminded him of. She was pale skinned with pouty pink lips and exotic lavender-light blue eyes that seemed to explode with the color. Her face was framed with raven black hair that hung perfectly straight, tucked neatly in her dark hood.

"Err, right. Well, the headmaster is waiting for you, second floor, right wing. I would not tarry if I were you," he said icily, looking away and ahead into the rain. He knew who she reminded him of now, but he was sure it wasn't the same person. He swept off with a swish of his robes, leaving her alone.

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I do not like him. He is too calculating, she thought to herself. _Far too prying, I can tell. _She lifted her head and swept into the castle, immediately feeling very small in the palatial Entrance Hall. She soon realized how easy it would be to become lost in here, and was grateful the stairs were visible from where she stood. She hesitated a moment, then walked to the foot of the stairs, listening to her soft-soled shoes patter across the stone floor, sounding like small explosions in the silence of the hall. Up the stairs she climbed, looking around as she walked, hand never leaving the cool stone rail, observing the moving paintings, and the statues as she turned right at the top of the stairs.

She looked down the corridor, and observed a large gargoyle against the right side of the hall. She walked up to it and observed the stone figure, knowing she would need some sort of password to make it move. For the second time since she arrived, a person walked out of the door she needed into. This was another tall man, with dark brown hair and bright blue eyes and he smiled at her. She swept her hood back as she saw a much older man; she guessed it to be the headmaster.

"Excellent, Harper, excellent, we shall see you tomorrow to prepare for the term then," said the wizened old wizard kindly. Cassandra's heart dropped, was she too late for the job? The man smiled at him and then at her, then walking down the hall, leaving her standing in front of the old wizard who was looking at her just as kindly.

"Are you Ms. Talin, for the Defense Against the Dark Arts position?" he asked, smiling.

"Yes sir, I am," she said quietly. She observed him, a medium-sized wizard, well on in years, but his bright blue eyes still twinkling with life. She felt herself relax slightly.

"Come in then dear, you're a bit wet," he said, chuckling slightly. He gestured for her to step in first, and she did, walking up a small flight of steps and stepping into a room that he had indicated.

Cassandra found herself in an odd, round room, pictures posted on the walls. A bright red bird rest on a perch off to the side, and she recognized it as a phoenix. Towards the back of the room was a dark wooden desk with a single chair in front of it. The man sat behind his desk and gestured for her to seat herself in the chair in front of him. She removed her cloak and sat down in the plush red chair, folding the cloak in her lap. He folded his hands and leaned forward.

"I am Albus Dumbledore, Headmaster of this school. We've been looking for a teacher to fill in for last year's, a bit of a hopeless he was. And the man outside," he said, answering the question that must have been apparent in her eyes, "was interviewing for Muggle Studies professor. Our previous professor has gone to live as a Muggle for a few years to…err, what did he say? Fully grasp their culture. Which put me at a disposition, being short two teachers. Alright, let's begin." He looked eagerly at her, and she waited for him to ask the first question

Snape walked up the stairs, thinking hard about the woman he had seen at the door. He wanted to slap himself for even allowing his mind to think it could be her, it was a complete waste of a thought. So what if she sounded slightly Russian, so what if she hid beneath her cloak? She's obviously a timid person. Or secretive. 

Severus had appointed himself as the watcher of the new teachers, as there were so many problems with them. Not a year had gone by that some new appointment hadn't caused trouble, usually revolving around evil. Dumbledore was too forgiving, not unwise, just too trusting. It seemed up to Severus to keep the teachers in line, and he had usually stopped a problem with them, except for two years back, when an ex-Auror had been appointed. Severus did not watch him out of fear and distrust, and the teacher ended up causing a student's demise, something Severus blamed himself for. Now he kept a close eye on them, and he had two to look after this year. 

He reached the gargoyle and spat the password distractedly. He heard faint voices behind Dumbledore's door, and knocked lightly.

"Come in," called Dumbledore. "Sorry Ms. Talin." Cassandra turned around in her chair to see that tall man again. He seemed to pop up everywhere. She looked at him carefully, taking in his long hair and black eyes, his thin mouth pressed shut firmly, and his long pale fingers grasping a beige folder. Not great looking, and something in his eyes made her uncomfortable, like he suspected her for something dreadful.

"Sorry to interrupt you Dumbledore, but Hagrid wanted you to read over this, his lesson plan," said Snape, some of the superiority drained from his voice. Cassandra guessed that he respected Dumbledore from his tone, as she had come to respect the Headmaster.

"Thank you Severus. Oh, Ms. Talin, this is Severus Snape, the Potion's master and Head of Slytherin house. Severus, this is Professor Cassandra Talin, our new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher," said Dumbledore with that familiar twinkle in his eye. Cassandra's eyes lit up when she heard that she had the job, and then she remembered that she had to shake Snape's hand. 

He shook her hand slightly and then let go, his grasp cold and his look colder. "Right, well, I have to go, Dumbledore," said Snape quickly. He gave her a calculating look and then swept out of the room.

Cassandra watched him leave, her face showing her puzzlement. "Don't worry," said Dumbledore in a reassuring voice, "He's like that with everyone."

"Oh, so I see. Alright, thank you Headmaster. I shall move my things in tomorrow and see you then. Thank you," she said, standing and shaking his hand. He smiled at her warmly and watched her go.

"Curious, very curious indeed," he mumbled to himself after the door had shut.

Cassandra Talin let herself out of the room and entered the corridor, looking at it in a completely new light, like one might study a new house, for that's what it was, her home now. She allowed herself a small smile and then put her damp cloak back on, feeling quite unprotected without it. She walked down the hallway and down the stairs until she reached the door. She was about to push the giant wooden doors open, but a voice rung out from behind her.

"So you got the job, did you?" said Snape's low voice in a silky, dangerous sort of way. She whirled around and stared at him intensely, not liking his prowling, stalking manner.

"Yes," she said shortly, and pushed the door open.

"Some say the job is jinxed," he said in a would-be casual way if it were not for his piercing eyes.

"I don't believe in luck or jinxes," she stated and left the castle abruptly. He stared at the door with a menacing manner, then twirled and stalked off to his dungeons, thinking that he had underestimated her willpower.

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I reiterate, she thought, _I do not like that man_. She shook her head slightly at the prospect of spending an entire year as a colleague with him, and tried not to think about it. She instead began to listen to the crunch of gravel beneath her shoes and thought of the long walk back to the Hogsmeade hotel as the rain poured over her head. She soon found solace within the forest once again.


	2. Colleagues

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Chapter Two: Colleagues

As Cassandra trudged back to her hotel, her thoughts turned to her new job, perhaps her new career if things turned out well. She wasn't a social person in any way, but she felt she could connect better with children who haven't had to experience the pains of life yet, what it truly meant to be an adult. They had young minds that could be shaped like clay, they were not hardened with the burdens of life yet. When she had first seen the ad in the paper, she had hesitated, for she knew it would be a spotlight type job, but now she was warming to the idea of being among youth, something she had never had. 

She was surprised when she found herself at the door of the tavern in Hogmeade so quickly. She removed her pale hand from underneath her cloak and opened the door with the wrought iron handle. She immediately heard the rumble of a crowded bar; a mingle of low whispers and laughing voices. She was about to head up the steps to her room when she heard a voice call to her.

"So how did it go?" said a pleasant voice, crisp and cool, yet warm in manner. She whirled around to see the Harper man again.

"I got the job, and I've been informed that you got your job as well, congratulations," she said, trying to be friendly. She figured having at least one person on her side couldn't hurt, she already had one enemy.

"Thanks, I've been looking for a job for awhile. Um, do you want to sit down and chat for a bit, just so we get to know each other? I feel like the underdog what with being a new teacher and all, do you feel like that?" he asked, his cool blue eyes staring straight into her swirling lavender-blue eyes. 

"Alright, I'll chat for a bit. I know what you mean, I've already met one of the teachers, I'm afraid he's not fond of me," she said, sounding a slight bit cold at her mention of Snape.

They moved over to a table near the stairs, but still in the corner, and sat opposite each other. She swept her hood off, allowing her long black hair to tumble down to her waist, a stark contrast against her pale white skin. She looked him over with a judging eye; he was a tall man with blue eyes and dark brown hair, a fairly handsome man, around her age. He had a smiling mouth and a kind look about him.

"Oh, yes, that man in black that seems to swoop around like a hawk?" he asked, making her smile at his comparison. She nodded in response. "Yeah, he's a bit unnerving, like he suspects you of trying to blow up the school."

"Yes, it's a bit creepy. Oh, I've forgotten myself, my name is Cassandra Talin, but a few people call me Cassi. You can call me whichever," she said, offering her hand in a handshake. 

He grasped her hand and shook it softly. "I'm Harper, Simon Harper. A few people call me Simon, but you can call me Simon," he said grinning broadly. Cassi normally didn't take to jokesters or comedy men, but this man was refreshingly nice and funny, and she enjoyed his joke, allowing herself to smile back. The two chatted for half an hour about the school and what they knew about it, trying to educate themselves as fast as possible on the history of the school. Finally, Cassandra stated that she needed to go pack her things, and Simon agreed, so both walked up the stairs to their rooms.

After dinner that night, Cassi went straight up to her room to go to sleep, not wanting to be tired for the next day, she would need her wits about her with people like Snape stalking her. 

Cassi drifted off into her dreams that night, once again finding herself not able to sleep through the entire night without having a nightmare. She only had a few nightmares, but each would present themselves to her in the same light: screaming from a place unknown, a shout to her, and then she would usually be smothered in darkness and die in her nightmares. Then she would sit bolt upright and stare out the window, looking for the moon to ease her fears. Somehow it's watery beams always calmed her from her sweat-soaked state, then she would drift back into her dreamless sleep, never indulging in sweet dreams, only nightmares.

The next day, Cassi checked out of the hotel before the sun rose, carrying her small suitcase, filled with everything she owned in the world, which was not much; a few robes, two books, a hairbrush, a few flasks of potions, and some other random items. She walked out of the hotel door and down the road, traveling cloak fluttering in the light summer breeze, still a bit damp from yesterday's excursion out in the rain. She set off silently, having not eaten breakfast, but scarcely noticed her hunger as she walked down the dirt road. A few puffy clouds had been left from the rains, but otherwise it promised to be sunny, something that didn't thrill Cassandra in the slightest. 

Finally she arrived at the castle after about twenty minutes of walking, the sun now half-risen. She opened the castle door with less hesitance today, and once again walked into the intimidating Entrance Hall. She walked up the steps of the castle, not paying attention to the paintings, but as she reached the last step, she saw Dumbledore coming towards her.

"Ah yes, good morning, professor," he said when he reached her. She smiled slightly at him. "Well, I suppose you will need to know where your classroom is, eh?"

"I believe that would help," she said, still smiling vaguely. He motioned for her to follow him, and they crossed to the left end of the corridor and wove their way around a bit while Cassandra tried to remember all of the turns they took. Finally they reached a thick wooden door and Dumbledore opened it with a key from his belt.

The classroom looked very dusty and in a slight disarray. Desks and chairs were flipped over or scattered about, and the bookcase in the back had shelves pulled off of it. Cassi blinked at the mess, then shrugged.

"It's not exactly in the best of states, but the teacher last year wasn't very…efficient. Right, well, your living quarters are in a branch off of your office," he said, waving a hand at a door in the corner of the room. She looked over there, completely nonplussed, but then turned to the headmaster.

"Thank you Dumbledore," she said, trying to sound a bit cheery, or at least hide her disgust of the room. He nodded and backed out of the room, leaving her in the middle of her gray room. She sighed and set off to work.

The first thing she did was to light the torches on the wall, then she straightened the rows of tables and put the chairs with them. When that was accomplished, she went through the books on the shelf, picking out ones that might be useful for her first few lessons. She then located her desk in her office and cleaned it with a Cleansing Charm, setting her new books on the desk. She looked over her room, closing her eyes at the amount of dust that was still left in it. She looked down at her black robes, now smudged with dust, and tried to pat it off, but to no avail. A sigh fell from her lips and she decided she needed a small change in scenery, so she opened the door in her office, and after a short walk down a dark corridor, came to a room with an old bed and wooden nightstand, with another door leading to her bathroom. The room was as drab as her classroom, but this didn't bother her in the slightest. In fact, she preferred it this way; if it had been bright and cheery, she would have changed the color scheme immediately to something more fitting, more gloomy. 

Cassandra set her small bag on the bed and opened it with a click. She scooped out her bottles of potions, some purple and others green, and set them on her nightstand. Then she put her robes in a chest at the end of her bed, finally placing everything else (minus the books) in her bathroom. She was pleased that she only carried a few items, and that her packing was done. She picked up the books and took them back to her office, setting them on the desk with her other set of books. A clock on the wall chimed once, and she was shocked that it was already the afternoon. There was a slight problem; she had absolutely no idea of the eating arrangements of this school. She knew there was a Great Hall (she had read about it in Hogwarts, A History) but she had no idea where it was. Not usually being the adventurous sort, but with no other options, Cassi set off to find the Hall, assuming it was on the ground floor. 

It quickly became evident that she was right; it was just a stone's throw away from the Entrance Hall, and there were already a few teachers at an elevated table at the end of this magnificent room. Cassi walked in shyly, keeping her eyes on the ground until she reached the table, not exactly sure of the seating arrangement.

"Here, my dear, the Defense teachers sit here," said a voice kindly from the table. Cassandra looked up at an older lady gesturing at a table fourth from the elegant gold one in the middle (one she had immediately assumed was Dumbledore's). "I'm Minerva McGonagall, Professor of Transfigurations. You must be Cassandra Talin. Dumbledore told me, I'm assistant deputy of the school." The lady seemed stiff and proper, but a kind look beheld her eyes. Cassandra instantly liked her.

"Thank you, Professor McGonagall," said Cassandra, trying to sound as nice as possible to make up for her mysterious manner.

"Are you Russian?" McGonagall asked curiously as they sat down, Minerva being only two seats from her, and the seat between them was empty.

Cassi faltered. Her past was something she hated to discuss, something that she would rather not think about. She touched a lock of her black hair and said in a small but firm voice, "Yes, I was born in St. Petersburg, but I moved here when I was young." There, she had said it, and McGonagall seemed content with that answer, obviously not the prying type like…

"Professor Talin, we meet again," sneered a deep voice from behind her, making her jump in her chair slightly. She glanced at him sideways as he sat down next to her, in the same seat he had always sat in since he became a teacher.

"Yes," she answered vaguely. _Obviously, it's bound to happen when you live under the same roof, you slimy man, _she thought sarcastically. She picked up her fork and ate her food in silence, trying to ignore the quick sideways glances she was getting from Snape.

He was actually trying to study her, guessing her to be three or four years younger than himself. There was more to her than the two-tone eyes and deep pink lips; no, there was something _in _her eyes that seemed familiar, something along the lines of hidden pain and mystery. A look he had seen in the mirror for so many years. But he did not feel sympathy for this creature, for Severus Snape feels no sympathy, instead, he began to mistrust her. He could tell from the get-go that there was something odd about her, something he couldn't quite place. A past something. Another stolen glance and an odd thought floated across his mind uncontrolled: She was beautiful. Severus nearly choked when he realized what he had just thought. Beautiful wasn't a word he bandied about with women, and as looks meant absolutely nothing to him, it wasn't something he often thought about. But, as he turned this radical thought over in his head, it was perfectly logical to think it, as it wasn't far from the truth. If it wasn't the perfect lips, then it was the long lashed, large and odd colored eyes. The way her straight raven black hair set off her pale white skin, the way it cascaded over her shoulders and down her back. 

Severus rolled his eyes; now he was just being silly. He did compliment himself on his ability to look down upon her beauty; what did beauty matter, where did it get you in life? Absolutely nowhere. Looks would only get you a second glance from a passing stranger and nothing more. No, this pretty little thing that dined next to him was something dangerous, he was almost certain, and he vowed then and there to keep his eye on her. He scowled unmercifully at his food.

Cassi was grateful when Simon walked in, easy as you please, and sat down next to her, obviously a bit more familiar with this place, or maybe he had asked questions, who knew? All Cassandra knew was that he was her saving grace from Snape's spiteful stares.

"Hi there, Cassi," Simon said casually. Snape listened without looking like he cared, eyes focused on his food. _Cassi_, he thought, _he called her Cassi. So they know each other…from where?_ He poked his food and continued to listen.

"Hi Simon. Have you been to your classroom?" asked Cassi, sounding sweet as can be, just to mock Snape. She would show him that she could be a caring person. 

"Yeah, it's all done and organized; there wasn't much for me to do," he said. Cassi looked mildly surprised. The two chatted on and Snape listened, becoming bored almost instantly. He was about to go when he noticed something.

"You don't eat meat," Snape said, puzzled. Cassi blinked at him.

"I'm a vegetarian, I don't like meat," she said plainly, something odd flickering in her eyes. He had struck something obviously, even Simon noticed.

"Well, there's nothing wrong with that," recovered Simon. "So she doesn't eat meat, big deal. Ok, well, I'm off to work on my lesson plan, I'll see you around Cassi." He smiled at her encouragingly and then strode off. Cassi quickly followed without a word to Snape. He sat for a moment, thinking hard, then stood up and left the room.

Cassi walked into her room, recovering from lunch. Two lies were enough from her, she was going to have a tough time keeping up with everything if people were this interested in her past. She sighed slightly while conjuring a rag and pail of water, then began to enchant the rag to wash the tables. She hurried off to grab up her lesson book and work on it while the rag cleaned.

By the time the sun set, her classroom was clean and her plans written weeks in advance. She begrudgingly locked up her room with a key Dumbledore had dropped by with, and set off for dinner, already prepared for the first day of school, in exactly one week.

During that one week, Cassandra had to put up with Snape. He wasn't really doing anything to her, but somehow, his mere presence was an annoyance to her. She knew he suspected her of something, and it was deeply bothering her that he would just sit there and brew upon it, observing her as she ate or when she passed down the corridor. He had found a button of hers, she hated to be watched, and he was pressing that button with glee. She came to despise him for it, and vowed to find a way to torment him during the year. She was not one to be pushed around, especially by hooked nosed, sallow skinned men like Snape. 

One day, while she was reading through one of her books in her classroom, she heard a hard knock at the door. Puzzled, she called for the person to come in. To her complete horror, it was Snape, looking just as unhappy as she felt.

"I'm supposed to come here and check on you," said Severus roughly. 

"Said who?" she asked, keeping the sarcasm in her voice to a bare minimum.

"Dumbledore. I'm also supposed to 'socialize', though that's where I draw the line," he said, and Cassi could see him cursing Dumbledore's orders under his breath. She smiled a bit, she would figure out his buttons right now, it was the perfect opportunity.

"Yes, you are far too good to socialize with the likes of me," she said, openly sarcastic now. She returned to her book.

"Or perhaps it's the other way around," sneered Snape. Cassi shut her book with a loud thump and set it down on her desk.

"Well, if you're so high and mighty, talk away. You know I value everything you have to say," she said sarcastically. Snape was caught off guard; he had never met a person that could dish it back out. He smirked at her, something she really didn't like.

"No thanks, I'd rather not, unless, of course, _you_ have something to say. A girl who magically appears out of _no where_ with much to hide, such as yourself, probably has much to chatter on about," he said, his tone mocking her.

Cassi blinked at him, then returned the smirk. "I'm not hiding anything. Well, as _you_ know _so _much about this school, I was wondering if you could tell me what the students are like?" She had hit the nail on the head. She had completely guessed that he was as nasty to the students as he was to her, and his thin face was twisted with malice.

"They are inattentive fools, who can not and do not appreciate their education. Except for Miss Hermione Granger, who cannot hold her tongue, the know-it-all. And she keeps company with the most menacing group Hogwarts has seen in years…Harry Potter and his little followers," Snape said, the biting hatred in his voice clearly evident. _Here we go_, she thought.

"Harry? Potter? He goes to this school? I've read all about him," she said quietly, slightly intimidated of teaching the Boy Who Lived. Snape shot her a look of disgust.

"Come now, Talin. Don't tell me you are one of his little worshippers too. You and the rest of the wizarding world." Snape looked positively infuriated. "He causes more trouble than one could imagine, and he pokes his nose everywhere. Him and his band of merry men are regarded as the tragic little heroes of the school, but I know what they really are, meddling children." Snape folded his arms and stared hard at the floor. _Bingo_, Cassi thought, _the major source of his annoyance, Potter. I will be taking advantage of this as soon as possible._

"Alright, that's quite enough chatting for me, I'm not some twittering gossip fairy, if you want to know things like that ask McGonagall or Flitwick. Or perhaps your new friend Harper, he seems to think he knows a lot," spat Snape, and he shot a glare at her and left the room. Cassi smiled to herself.

"Perfect," she said, smiling like a hunter who had finished setting their trap. All there was left to do was to wait a few more days, then sweet revenge, inflicted in small amounts; her favorite kind. 

A few days later, the teachers bustled around the castle making sure everything was in its place, as in a few hours the scarlet Hogwarts Express would pull into the station. Snape was mercifully busy due to his position as Head of Slytherin, leaving Talin to her own devices. Her classroom was perfect, the lessons in perfect order, everything was exactly as it should be. Cassi sighed as she looked around her classroom and then trudged up to her bedroom, picking out one of her black robes (they were all black) and putting it on. She then braided her hair into two French braids, her plaits trailing down her back, giving her a look of innocence, something that completely shocked her when she looked in the small mirror on the wall. She stared at herself, stared at the pale thin person looking intently back at her. Then she walked over to her nightstand where her potions lay; she picked up a small vial of green potion and drank a small sip from it, shuddering at the bittersweet taste. 

With a deep breath, she left her room and started down to the Great Hall, where the teachers were to assemble precisely half an hour before the students arrived. Most of the teachers were already there, waiting at the Staff table eagerly. Cassi rolled her eyes and forcibly marched up to her spot next to Snape, sincerely hoping that he might somehow drown in his goblet of wine. She huffily sat down next to him, staring straight ahead of her to avoid his eyes.

"Good day to you too," he said sarcastically, and continued to watch the doors through which the little children which cursed his life would come. He was about to make a snide remark when Dumbledore walked into the room. Severus stiffened and became silent. Cassi smirked and stared hard at the door. Albus walked up the to table cheerily after he deposited a tattered hat onto a stool in front of them, watching McGonagall walk out of the room in order to greet the first years.

"Good evening, Severus," said Albus with a small twinkle in his eyes. "How are you fairing?"

"I'm fine Dumbledore," he said in a monotone voice so as not to attract attention to himself. Dumbledore nodded slightly and then looked past him at Cassandra.

"And you Professor Talin?" he asked.

"Wonderful, Headmaster," she said with enthusiasm.

"So glad you like it here," Albus said, grinning. Cassi shot Snape a look of superiority, and he glared at her. Fortunately, a loud roar could be heard echoing in the front corridor, and Cassandra watched the students pour in and walk to one of the four tables set out before them. Some stood on their tip-toes to find their friends, and others had already formed circles, talking excitedly. Eventually they all sat down at a wooden chair at their table, some noticing their new teachers with indifference and shrugs. Only one group of keenly watched them: Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, and Ron Weasley. 

~

Harry Potter looked up from the Gryffindor table to the Staff table, his eyes lingering on a black haired woman. Ron seemed to be looking at her too, _though looking may not be the correct term_, Harry thought and he laughed.

"So Ron, do you reckon she's the new Defense teacher?" asked Harry. Ron just continued to stare until Harry waved an energetic hand in his face, causing him to shake his head violently.

"Oh, uh yeah I guess so," Ron stuttered, and Hermione rolled her eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me Hermione, it's not my fault she's…pretty…"

"And twice your age? And your teacher? And not interested in what students seem to think?" ventured Hermione, and Ron scowled and folded his arms. "Ron, I daresay the correct term for you now is girl crazy; earlier it was that Ravenclaw, then the Hufflpuff and now a teacher? And anyway, you don't see me going bonkers over the teacher sitting next to her, do you?"

"What, Snape?" Harry asked, pulling a face.

"Oh God _no_. No no no, the _new_ one, other side. Wonder what he teaches…" she said, looking faintly sick at the thought of staring at Snape like that. Ron shuddered. 

"Ugh, Harry, Snape? Sick!" exclaimed Ron, and Harry punched him in the arm.

"Yeah, well, this new teacher which Ron seems fond of can't be too bad, look at Snape," said Harry to Hermione, and she looked up to see the mystery teacher shooting death glares at Snape, and Snape returning them.

They quickly stopped talking as they saw McGonagall lead in a group of terrified first years. A moment later, the hat sang its new song, Cassi being shocked at the prospect of a singing hat. Very soon it was over, and everyone seated clapped politely. Then McGonagall unrolled a scroll and read out the names of the first years, who each nervously placed the hat on their heads, and after some consideration, the hat would scream out a name: Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, Gryffindor, or Slytherin. Cassandra noticed that Snape would faintly smile every time a child was Sorted into his House, giving her the impression that he favored his students of his House perhaps more than others. All this she took into account for the war she waged against the Potion's master, because _no one_ sneaks around and spies on Cassandra Talin and gets away with it.

The rest of dinner went smoothly, minus Snape's vegetarian comments, which Cassi dismissed. She was too busy talking with Simon, who was showing her great kindness. However, she did not want to get too close to him, for fear of awkward questions. Instead, she listened.

The sun was well up over the treetops of the Forbidden Forest by the time classes started the next day. Her first class, Gryffindor sixth years, were already in their seats when the bell rang. Their teacher was sitting on a stool in front of the class, watching them wordlessly, and as the high pitched bell rang, she continued to watch them, causing a nervous silence and some fidgeting.

"Good morning," she said in a quiet voice, her slight accent shocking a few. One did not generally find many Russians in this part of the world, especially in these times. The students watched her closely.

She stood and looked at each of them carefully, her lavender-blue eyes pinning each one with a fixed look. "Tell me, what have you covered?" It was a simple question, but no one really felt like answering, that is, except Hermione Granger. Cassi nodded in her direction, indicating for her to speak.

"Well," started Hermione, her voice rather shaky. "We've covered the Dark Arts of Asia, cornish pixies, a vast number of magical creatures, the Unforgivable Curses, and last year we learned…well, about two hexes." She finished with that, and some of her classmates nodded with agreement.

"Does the word _declino_ mean anything to you? How about _subsisto_? _Contego_?" she looked at them, some shaking their heads, others just plainly watching her. "Well, we have a lot more work to do than I thought."

"This is _Defense_ Against the Dark Arts, so shall be teaching you shields, how to stop or freeze your attacker. We'll do counter-attacks, perhaps even a few hexes. I'll have to see how you do on your shields."

"As far as my teaching goes, I will let you know up front that I am strict. I do not tolerate horseplay and disobedience, I ask for your undivided attention. If there is any sort of infraction of these simple rules, I have no problem with subtracting House points, assigning detentions, or dealing with it myself." At this point she flashed a smile, not an entirely friendly one, but a smile at that. "There won't be much note taking, I don't think a Death Eater is going to pause and patiently wait for you to pull out your notes and leaf through them gingerly whilst you look up a shield. No, this is more practical, more hands on."

She sat on her stool, placing her feet on the lowest rung, which hid them under the hem of her robes. She lifted her hand and snapped her fingers, causing her attendance book to fly from her desk into her palm with intense speed, though she caught it deftly. As she was turning through the neat sections to her Gryffindor pages, she spoke again in a firmer voice. "We live in dark times, I'm afraid. Dark times. Therefore, I have decided that during the last few weeks of the year, we shall have a type of history lesson on the rise, curses, and attacks of Voldemort."

At her last word, half the class gasped, while the other half looked quite pale, glancing around fearfully at each other. This reaction caused Cassandra to look up from her role, slightly amused.

"What was that about?" she asked, half laughing, half staring at them with questioning eyes. "Yes, it's awful isn't it? I say the 'V' word! Ladies and gentlemen, Lord Voldemort is not going to swoop down upon those who speak his name, and personally, I don't see why people don't call him by his proper name. I'm not asking you to go out into the world rebelliously and hunt him down, I'm asking you to call him Voldemort, his name, just like I call you by your name. Fear of a word is not a wise fear. Fear of the thing itself is totally different than fearing its name." And with that speech over with, she called out each of their names, pausing ever so slightly when 'Harry Potter' said 'here'. Finally the role was called, and she began her class, starting with teaching them their first shield, the _Tutela_ shield. After a short bit, people wands began to spark, and she broke them into groups to practice their first shield. When they were in groups, she gave them a bit of a dummy curse to use on each other, leaving the victim with a slightly eerie tingly feeling to let them know their shield didn't work. Eventually most got the hang of it, and she promised them that they would have more practice next time as the bell rung. Before they could all file out of her class, she called Harry up to her desk in the corner.

"Harry, I noticed you had no difficulty with that spell, have you used similar?" she asked, innocent eyes boring into his. 

Harry thought back to last year when he used the Impedimenta spell to freeze attackers. "I've used something close to it before," he said lightly.

She smiled at him. "Well, good job with it, five points to Gryffindor. Oh, and what is your next class?"

"Potions," answered Harry, with a hint of disgust in his voice.

"So I see, well, I send my condolences. I will see you then, Harry," she answered, and Harry perked up and walked out of the room, thinking hard on her last statement. Condolences? _In that case, she must be about as big a Snape fan as I am, not one at all_, he thought to himself smugly, and he rushed off to tell Hermione and Ron what their new teacher just said.

~

Fairly shortly, it became quite apparent to Harry's group of the depth of the two teachers despise for each other. The looks they shot at each other in the hallways was nothing short of hatred, and both seemed to be testing the other, trying to see how far they could push each other.

And for some reason, Harry was stuck in the middle of their little game. After about a week, Snape figured out that Cassi had a favorite, and that favorite was the very son of Severus' archenemy, James Potter. This annoyed Snape to no end, causing Cassi great delight. 

On the Monday two weeks after the start of term, Snape was on the prowl, watching and waiting for Professor Talin to walk to lunch so he could berate her, when suddenly a short figure collided with him and was sprawled to the floor.

"I'm sorry Professor," stammered Harry Potter as he stood up. He had been trying to avoid Draco's group in the hallway, and hadn't seen Snape lurking around the corner.

"Watch where your running, Potter. Ten points from Gryffindor for physical abuse to a teacher, and be glad it isn't more," sneered Snape, looking over his head for Talin. Harry noticed his distraction and walked off, surprised he had only gotten ten points from Gryffindor.

Cassi rounded the corner at about that time, and watched Harry rush away from Snape.

"What did you say to him?" she asked, instantly furious.

"He ran into me!" he said, a smile of menace spreading on his face. "So I did what was appropriate, do you have a problem with that, your majesty?"

"Don't call me that, unless writhing in pain is something you like to do," she said lightly, and continued walking.

"I'm not done talking to you," he growled and fell into step beside her.

"Well, I am," she said.

"Where were you yesterday afternoon?" he said, totally ignoring her last comment. Cassi hadn't been in the castle when he had tried to hunt her down yesterday.

"What, are you my official stalker? I was on the grounds, Snape, trying to get some peace of mind away from you, happy?" she said roughly, though her last words were sourly true, striking him hard.

"As much as you'd like to think I'm stalking you, I'm not," he said, quickening his pace to match hers.

"Well you're doing a damn good impression of it, and if you wouldn't mind, please keep your big nose out of my business," she said. She walked quickly into the Hall and took up her seat among the other teachers, a safe haven from Snape. Simon quickly engaged her in conversation, and she forgot about Snape for awhile. That night however, she downed her potions with vigor and slept soundly, dreamlessly.

The next day in Potions, Snape was still sore at her. Harry shuffled in nervously after her class, dreading what could happen. Snape had let him off easy yesterday, and he felt quite unprotected without Professor Talin around. 

Harry set up his cauldron between Ron and Hermione, and began to follow the instructions on the board. He was just starting the grate the dried toad liver when he felt a slight rush of air behind him, and that feeling one gets when someone is watching you.

"So, Mr. Potter, have I missed anymore of your celebrity updates? You know I love to keep up with the young star's fascinating life," said Snape silkily. Picking fights was a specialty of his, and a lovely reason to deduct points from Gryffindor.

Harry remained silent, while Ron and Hermione watched Snape with open-mouths. They could scarcely believe that Snape was blatantly provoking Harry, and talking to Dumbledore about it seemed to be on their minds.

"No? That's good, I don't want to miss any press cuttings. I also haven't had the chance to tell you an important message," said Snape softly, and he leaned closer to Harry and whispered. "I will not be tolerating any more of your little night excursions, robbings of my Potions' store, or flippant disobedience of the rules Dumbledore has set before you. One of these days your pride is going to get you in trouble, and I will make sure I'm there when it does." And with that last threatening note, he walked off with the swish of his cloak. He could soon be heard terrorizing Neville, who had grated the wrong ingredient.

"Oooh, he's tense," whispered Hermione. "You don't think it has anything to do with Talin, does it? They don't….seem to get along."

"Yeah, that's it. They were arguing about me yesterday, I heard them. I don't blame her, she's the only one who has stood up to him as far as I can remember," said Harry in a low voice, and Ron nodded

"I dunno, maybe she'll finish him off for us, sounds really good to me," he said in a mutter. He chopped his bat wings a little harder than most, but Snape had that effect on people.

~

The next few weeks carried on like that, each snipping at each other, making as many cutting remarks as they could while walking past each other. Actually, very very deep inside of himself, Snape enjoyed being able to cut at someone who could throw it back, someone to match wits with. Cassi was just pure annoyed.

Her classes were going well, the students were not as stupid as Snape let on. They were actually fairly eager to learn, thinking that they were bettering themselves from He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named with their feeble shields. Cassi got along well with every House (though Hufflepuffs were a little afraid of her), especially Slytherin and Gryffindor. This angered Snape endlessly, his own House and their rivals! It was a scandal, he didn't even think she was that good of a teacher, certainly he could do so much better. She was an improvement, but a small one.

Improvement or not, she acted so strangely. She would take her breaks outside, as if staying in the safe walls of Hogwarts would kill her. She walked alone, talked (and Snape knew she wasn't really talking with Simon, he was the one chattering) with no one, in fact, she was a rogue. A solitary soul. And something in her bright eyes was off, something wasn't quite right, causing even more suspicion in Snape. He had entertained the idea that she could work for Voldemort, she very well could. He decided he would follow her on one of her little outings one of these days.

~

On a Friday night at the end of September, Cassi trudged up to the Staff table for dinner, feeling particularly tired after her lessons. To her unenthusiastic surprise, Snape was already seated at the near empty table, while Simon was no where to be seen, leaving her quite alone. She sighed and stamped her foot slightly, then forced herself into her chair. They exchanged no words; Severus was preoccupied with talking to Dumbledore. Cassi breathed with relief and then began to eat her meal in peace.

It was about half way through her meal when it happened. Cassi had just set down her fork, when a sharp, burning pain scalded her arm so intensely that she gasped and clutched her arm without knowing she was doing so. And Snape, sitting beside her, noticed, for he had just felt a burn on his arm. His eyes stared at her accusingly, but were shocked to see something in hers he hadn't expected: fear. In a flash she had left the table and was walking out of the Hall very quickly. As soon as she hit the doors she was running. Snape was after her just as quickly.

Cassi wove through the halls trying to hide but it was useless, Snape knew these halls better than she ever could. He was surprisingly fast and soon caught her by the wrist and pinned her against the wall, both breathing hard.

"Death Eater," he hissed at her. She tried to break free of his grasp, but that too was useless. She was held fast to the stone wall behind her, staring into his hatefully dark eyes. _And now I have to tell him_, she thought.


	3. Tangled Web We Weave

****

Chapter 3: Tangled Web We Weave

Severus had Cassi's wrists pinned to the wall, and despite her struggling, she couldn't move.

"Snape, this is really none of your business, now let me go," she said quietly, her struggling and avoiding him further exemplifying her guilt in his eyes.

"So you admit it? You're a Death Eater?" he hissed. His cold dark eyes were strangely alight with the situation.

"No, I am not a Death Eater. Now let me go," she said more firmly. Severus took a step closer to avoid her escape.

"I'm not letting go until you explain yourself. I'm already going to take you to Dumbledore as it is," he said venomously. She finally stopped struggling.

"Dumbledore already knows," she said defeated. She would have to tell him.

"Talin, you are conflicting your last plea. How can Dumbledore know that there is nothing to know? You either are or you aren't, you can't have it both ways. And personally," he sneered, "My vote is on the 'are'."

"That's what you think," she said sarcastically.

"Well, if you have nothing to hide, you wouldn't mind if I did this," he implored, and with a sudden movement, took her wrist and raised it above her head, causing the sleeve of her robe to slip down to her shoulder. And on her pale white skin was a black skull with a snake protruding from the mouth, the mark of a Death Eater, the all-familiar mark.

"Explain," he said angrily, his face scarcely an inch from hers.

"Snape, let me go and I'll explain," Cassi said, her anger matching his. Severus made no movement to let her go. "Snape, if you value your reputation at all, you will let me go. Do you realize how this looks?" After a second of consideration, Snape let go and backed away. The students would be coming back from dinner shortly and he didn't want any false rumors flying around the school.

"Only you would think like that," he muttered to her. He grabbed her wrist and jerked her to her classroom. He unlocked the door with his wand and rushed into the room, finally letting her go and closing the door behind him.

"Talk," he said tensely. Cassi fidgeted slightly and then sat down on her stool at the front of her empty classroom, staring off into the corner of her room.

"Fine, but you must swear that you won't tell anyone else, I like my privacy and it really isn't anyone else's business. Come to think of it, it isn't any of your business either but if it'll get you off my back, I'll talk. But first swear what I say is in confidence," she said, visibly tense.

"I'll be the judge of that," he said silkily.

Cassi spoke nervously, though she still maintained her sarcastic tone as she always had. "Alright, you want to know my story, here it is: there is nothing to tell. Nothing. As silly and outlandish as it sounds, it is nothing but the utmost truth." She stared at him, trying to find the right words to explain her story, which wasn't exactly complicated, but it was difficult to explain nonetheless. 

"You're being vague. Again. I would like to hear some details on this nothingness, because if it is truly nothing, you should have no problem sharing it," he said, eyes flashing. She sighed and collected her words.

"Gods, you make everything difficult, don't you? Fine, I'll tell you. You want to know who my parents are? Where I was brought up? What school I went to? I wouldn't be able to tell you, because the truth of the matter is that I don't know. This sounds so stupid, but it's true. It was about …oh lets see, fifteen years ago? Yes, that's about right, fifteen years ago I woke up in the middle of the woods without the faintest clue as to what I might be doing there. Or what my name was. Or why that tattoo on my arm burned so much. I still don't. The only thing I remembered was how to perform spells. I don't remember a bloody thing about myself, or anything about this Mark. I am not a Death Eater, because I am who I've become. My name, Cassandra Talin, is just a name I made up when they asked me to fill it in on my job application. So there you have it, you now know my darkest secret, though I doubt you believe it." She spoke very bitterly, and she hated how stupid it sounded when she put it into words. At this moment, she hated him for inquiring, and even more for now knowing.

"Not really," he said in a low voice. "Your story is a bit too fantastic for me."

"Well, it's the truth, take it or leave it, or if it really bothers you, talk to Dumbledore about it. I don't like talking about myself, so if you have any questions ask them now, because this topic is off limits after tonight." Her aire was indifferent again, and she hoped she had said enough to make him back off, as she was really sick of being watched from the shadowy corners of Hogwarts.

"So you expect me to believe all this? It sounds like something out of a storybook! 'One magical day, a girl wakes up and thinks to herself, 'Oh gee, now who am I again?' And then she shrugs and skips off, making it up as she goes'," said Snape, his tone mocking as he mimicked her story. If this situation hadn't been so hard for her, she would have laughed at his imitation, then slapped him good and hard for it, but unfortunately she was too concerned to find the humor in his statement.

"Well, if you put it like that, then of course it sounds impossible," she spat darkly, her Russian accent even more prominent when she was angry. _He has no clue how hard it is not knowing anything about yourself_, she thought angrily. Her mind reeled. "And I have one question for you, oh great Potions Master, how the hell did you know when the Dark Mark burned?" Though it was a question, her tone was accusatory. 

"_That_ is none of your business," he said, not liking where this topic had gone. He turned and was about to leave the room, but she jumped off her stool and blocked the exit to the door.

"Absolutely not Snape. I just told you something I've only told one person, I'm not about to let you frolic around without hearing how you knew," she said quite firmly. Snape glared at her.

"All you need to know is that I used to be one, but I quit and Dumbledore trusts me. Now, if you'll excuse me Miss Talin, I'd like to exit the room," he said, pushing past her (though she would have let him go anyway) and stalking out of the room.

Cassi stared at the closed door with an uneasy feeling in her stomach. She really didn't like the fact that he knew so much about her, but something in his last statement calmed her; it was the fact that he still called her Talin, though he knew it wasn't really her name. Cassi instantly berated herself for thinking such things, Cassi was her name, she had known nothing else, and she was who she was. She would never be anyone else.

Still slightly disturbed, she turned and entered her office, soon finding her way to her bedroom. She got ready for bed and tried to sleep, staring hard out the window from under her covers. The moon glared at her and she tried to block it out tonight, it was no longer her source of contentment. Nothing was.

Snape, however, was not going to sleep at all. As soon as he left her classroom, he set off for the second floor. When he reached the gargoyle, he said the password without a second thought and stepped into the hole. He froze for a fraction of a second to listen to Dumbledore's office but no sound came from it with the exception of Dumbledore humming a happy sort of tune. Snape breathed in deeply and stormed into the room.

"Dumbledore, may I have a word?" Severus asked, his anger clearly evident in his voice. Dumbledore looked up from his letter and smiled at Severus.

"Certainly, have a seat," he said kindly, his eyes shining.

"No thanks; I think I'll stand. Dumbledore, do you know what our Defense teacher is?" he said, waiting intently for Dumbledore's reply.

"From what I hear, she's part Russian," stated Dumbledore simply, but Severus stared at him, waiting for him to continue. At this, the Headmaster's eyes grew serious and penetrating. "She told you?" His tone was as serious as the glint in his eyes.

"Well, yes and no. You see Dumbledore, at dinner the Mark burned on my arm, and I turned to her and she was grasping_ her _arm_. _Well, I immediately sprung up and asked her what was going on, and after some…coaxing she told me," said Severus, ready to jump into his next argument, but Dumbledore cut him off light-heartedly.

"Oh, is that why you both jumped up?" he asked, half smiling. Severus was not amused.

"Good God, no! Dumbledore, that is absurd! Her and I? Don't flatter her," Severus stuttered. Dumbledore laughed. 

"Dumbledore, why did you hire her? She could be lying! She could jeopardize everything!" Severus was irate at this point, though still speaking softly with a fierce passion. His black eyes burned at the thought of what Dumbledore was putting at stake. Dumbledore leaned forward.

"Are you really that concerned about her? You must be, you've never questioned my appointments before quite like this-" Dumbledore said in a firm voice, and started speaking again to interrupt Severus' pleas that he wasn't questioning him. "Don't worry Severus, I understand your position, and I know it's a bit of a risk, but she happened to testify under Veritaserum…and I believe her."

"Then I will comply with your trust Dumbledore, I just wished to express my concern," said Severus meekly.

"I understand," he said kindly as Severus left the room. He walked out into the hall, head bowed in concentration. The story, so unbelievable, it can't be true! He walked into his dungeon. And yet, you can't lie under Veritaserum, can you? Impossible, fantastic …but true? Things like that don't happen in real life, but Severus had no choice but to accept this and move on. He cleared his mind of her ridiculous story before going to sleep that night, hoping to forget it entirely.

~

High-pitched laughter rung through the forest. Severus looked up into the canopy of the trees, seeing swatches of the night sky through it. The laugh rung out once again, causing him to become nervous. Perhaps he should leave the forest, things didn't feel right.

He turned around to leave, and jumped when he saw a heavily cloaked figure standing in his path. His nervousness increased to a barely suppressible panic, but he remained rooted to the spot. The figure did not move for a while, then suddenly held out its pale hand and gestured for him to follow it. He swallowed hard and fell into step behind the figure.

Together they trudged through the forest a little ways, Severus hearing no noises other than the swishing of cloaks and the crunching of leaves beneath their feet. He had hung his head to look closer at these leaves, when he realized that there was a sudden absence of sound, and he jerked his head up to see that the cloaked figure was gone. He was left in the middle of a clearing, which appeared to be empty, save the black huddle on the ground.

He stared at the huddle, then was struck with the realization of what it was, taking in a sharp breath and stepping back. The laughing cackled through the trees, echoing in the darkness. 

"Severus, I don't know what's going on. Severus, something's not right. Severus, I think he suspects us!" A familiar, eerie voice chanted this softly over and over and he stepped forward, approaching the black mass on the ground. His hands trembled as he reached down to touch it, but jerked back when he caught sight of his hands, which dripped with blood. The voice grew louder.

"Severus, I think he suspects us!"

"No! I didn't mean for it to happen! No!" he shouted back at the voice, his words ringing around the clearing, falling upon unhearing ears. A scream and a laugh sounded back at him, growing louder, closer. He turned away to run, but started when he found another cloaked figure next to him, watching the huddle on the ground with a certain serenity.

"Why? Why didn't you help me? Why, Severus?" asked the small voice in a sob. She held out her blood-soaked hands to him. He jumped back, revolted, but she stepped forward as well.

Severus Snape woke with a start, sitting straight up in bed and breathing hard.

"Damn it," he whispered softly, and wiped his brow with the back of his hand. He was more than used to these kinds of dreams, they had only tortured his sleep for years upon years, but had eventually decreased over time. However, every now and then one would come back to haunt him, persecuting him for his past.

Severus thought hard about the dream. He hadn't dreamed about _Her_ in forever, putting that situation as far back into the dark corners of his memory as he could. What had triggered it again? The moon shone through his window, illuminating his cold room in soft white light.

Cassandra. That silly imp of a girl and her fairy tale past. Though his encounter with her had been a week ago, the details still rung fresh in his mind. His mind was put at ease as he remembered that Cassi had reminded him of _Her, _that's where all of this had come from. He settled back down under his covers and closed his eyes.

"So you've decided to terrorize me with dreams as well, eh Ms. Talin? I don't think so," he muttered angrily to himself, forcing his mind to calm down.

The following morning, Talin and Snape entered the Great Hall grumpily, neither saying a word to the other. Cassi stole a sideways glance at him, and noticed that he looked very tired, then she smirked and went back to eating, hoping that whatever had kept him up had bothered him to no extent. She became lost in her thoughts.

When Snape turned to her, she started out of her daydreams. She kept her face very blank and waited for the high and mighty one to speak.

"Are you going to the game today?" he placidly asked. She remembered that there was a Quidditch game today, Gryffindor versus Slytherin, and she nodded.

"Of course I'll be there, wouldn't want to miss a chance to see Gryffindor play. Of course, I say this in all impartiality, as I'm neutral to all Houses, as all of the teachers are supposed to be," she stated with a sarcastic smile.

"We wouldn't want to show favoritism, would we?" he sneered back at her.

"No, of course not. That would be unethical. Playing favorites among students while bullying others would simply be wrong. Anyone who does that deserves to be fired," she smiled at him once again and stood. "I'll see you at the game then, Snape." She had raised her voice for the last statement. He muttered darkly under his breath and she left the table. A few teachers looked at her retreating figure, then back at him, then smiled slightly and talked to their neighbor animatedly. He glared at each and every one of them for merely thinking what they had assumed, then he too left, still thinking about her in an aggravated way. 

An hour later, Cassi walked among the flood of students to the wooden stands. She tore away from the group at the foot of a flight of stairs, walking down a long hallway to a door, then entering into an open-air box with an excellent view of the field. She looked around the box and found it surprisingly full. Spying a spot next to Simon, she started to walk his way, but halted when she saw that it was also next to Snape. She closed her eyes briefly and summoned all her self-control, then walked over and sat between Simon and that evil git.

"Hi there, I was hoping you'd get here before someone took that spot," he said with a smile. She smiled then leaned over to whisper something to him.

"Why, of all places, did you pick a spot near him?" she said in a quiet tone. He laughed and leaned over to her, pushing her hair away from her ear.

"It was all there was left. Though we could go sit with the students, but its not the same view, sorry Cassi." He smiled and patted her on the shoulder in a sympathetic way, and she sighed and smoothed her robes, wishing that Snape would simply implode.

Severus watched the two of them whispering and flirting back and forth, and looked around to see if any one else saw this, but they didn't. He was totally put out; the staff always seemed to pick up whenever Cassi and himself were 'talking', but whenever Simon was there, they seemed to look the other way, annoying him to no end. He gave up, defeated, and put his elbow on his knee, then his chin on his palm to watch the game.

Fortunately, the players had mounted their brooms in the center of the field, and Madam Hooch had the whistle to her lips. It's shrill scream sounded out and the Quaffle was thrown upwards, which was immediately snatched up by the Slytherin Chaser. The game commenced in a whirl of red and green robes and the loud voice of one of Cassi's students, to whom she listened to as she tried to watch everything at once, which was impossible.

Back and forth the Quaffle was thrown, neither team scoring for some time. The Beaters zoomed around the stadium, trying to unseat the Chasers with the wild hits of the Bludger. Before Cassi could see who had the Quaffle, and another shrill whistle was heard, and the game slowed to a stop. Her announcer-student had paused, trying to figure out what had just happened.

"What's going on?" asked Cassi, half to herself, half to Simon. "Who's in possession?" He shrugged.

"Gryffindor has the Quaffle now, Slytherin just got a penalty for cobbing," Snape stated factually, his eyes still on the game as Gryffindor got ready for a penalty shot. He looked sideways and caught the look of puzzlement on her face. "Cobbing is excessive use of the elbows, it's tough to call though, as all the teams tend to play roughly, especially these two."

"Oh," she said, watching the game return to its fast pace. "Thank you."

Snape almost caught himself saying it was no problem, but stopped himself before the words could form on his lips. "Just don't make a bother of yourself anymore," he recovered. That had been close, he had almost been … _civil _to her. He shook his head, repeating in his mind that games tended to put him off guard. 

By the time he had brought his thoughts back around to the game, a Gryffindor Chaser had put the Quaffle through the tallest hoop, and the crowd was going wild. He muttered a curse beneath his breath for being too distracted to see the goal and for the fact that his house was losing.

Roughly an hour later, and three more scores by Gryffindor, the game ended as Harry Potter caught the Golden Snitch as it fluttered about near the base of the three hoops on the Slytherin side. Severus smacked him forehead in disappointment and stood to leave. Cassi stayed however, and watched as Harry flew overhead, glittering ball with flitting wings still in hand, making his lap of honor.

Snape rolled his eyes and sighed. "Come on Cassi, you don't need to inflate Mr. Potter's overly enlarged ego anymore than it already is. You can congratulate him later."

Cassandra whirled around, and gave him an odd look, fixing him with this weird stare for quite some time. "Did you just call me Cassi?" she asked, still puzzled.

He had, and he nearly smacked himself for doing so. "It's your name, isn't it?" he snapped.

"Yes, yes it is, but you've never called me by my first name, let alone my nickname," she said, now following him out the box door and down the stairwell. "I think the most endearing term I've heard from your mouth is 'you stupid girl'. Or maybe it was 'Professor Talin', but of course you have to say it in that horribly acidic way you do, or it loses it's entire effect."

"Yes, well I'll note that in the future I am not to call you by your name," he growled, not liking all this hounding for an error he had made (as rare as they were, and he preferred even those to go unnoticed).

"Actually, I think I'd rather you _do _call me Cassi. It doesn't sound nearly as hateful as I would have expected. And it is my name, after all. But I don't think I'll call you by your first name just yet." Cassi ended her statement placidly enough, but it was enough to make Snape try to remember if she had ever called him anything but his surname, but no such luck. _She is too aware of her actions, _he thought angrily. _How am I supposed to catch her at her own game if she remember every word she says? Damn her._

Later that afternoon, when Cassi was going through her participation grades in her classroom, she decided that she rather liked the near civility Snape had shown her at the game. She still knew he was a horrible, sniveling man whom she would dearly love to give a black eye, but perhaps he was a little more human-like than what she thought. Well, less bat-like, anyway.

Time plummeted forth into the crisp October, and Cassi found herself very busy the weekend before a test she was to give the following class periods. She awoke early that morning and ate quickly, brushing past Snape on her way out as he entered the Hall. 

He watched her pass, then continued up to the high table, thinking that she was in one of those unsociable moods again. She had almost been conversational (or as least as talkative as he had ever seen her) that day in the Quidditch box, but quickly after that she had taken to shutting herself up in her classroom again. Snape thought about this as he ate his breakfast. He decided that since he had caught up on grading all the essays on Thinking Potions that he would spend a bit of time in the teacher's lounge. 

He stood and left the Hall, winding has way down the familiar halls until he came to a wooden door on his left. He pushed the door open and sat down in his usual chair by the fireplace, which already had a fire in it. There was a copy of the Daily Prophet next to his chair, so he picked it up and read it with mild interest. He was disgusted at the fact that there were no articles about the Dark happenings in the wizarding world, and even more disgusted when he realized how much the media was controlled by the Ministry. All the articles were happy and upbeat, almost making him wish there were some of those amusing Rita Skeeter articles about Harry. Those had been worth his time to read, but Rita had mysteriously quit the business, and it was rumored that she was working as a shop assistant in some far away city. A pity. He found himself wondering if Cassi had seen any of those articles, but he thought she seemed the type that didn't read that sort of rubbish.

"You should go see her, Severus," said a clear voice from across the room. He set down his paper on his lap and looked up to see who was talking to him. Professor McGonagall was sitting across from him in a wooden chair, her hands folded on her lap. Simon had come in and was sitting at the table near them. He was reading a book and didn't appear to have heard McGonagall.

"Go see who?" said Snape, trying to pretend that he hadn't been thinking about her at that moment. He suspected her of mind reading, and thought if she could that she might want to look into taking up the Divinations position, as the fraud who had the spot now was hopeless at it.

"You know who I'm talking about. I can tell you're thinking about her, you've got that spiteful look on you face and your hands are clenched," she said plainly. Severus immediately cleared his expression and folded his hands, scowling at them for betraying his thoughts. She smiled and continued. "I think she's lonely, you should go see her."

"And what would possess me to do that?" he asked guardedly, and she merely smiled in reply and left the room. Severus growled and picked up his paper again, trying to concentrate on reading it, but no such luck. He decided it wouldn't hurt anyone if he just went to see what she was doing. _She could be up to something_, he thought. _Yes, that's it, she could be up to something. Spending all that time alone, she has to be. And it's my job to make sure nothing goes undetected. I better go see her._

He stood up from his chair, and after shooting a sideways glance at Simon to see if he was watching him, but he wasn't, he continued out the door and down more corridors until he came to the familiar door of the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom. Unfortunately, the door was locked, but there was no light being emitted from the crack between the door and it's frame, so he assumed that she had gone out on one of her little walks again. This was his chance to see exactly what she did on these outings that he had wanted to know about for so long.

Perhaps if he too took a walk, then he might bump into her. This seemed like a good idea to him, so he set off for the Entrance Hall. As he neared the Hall, he heard a loud, deep voice ring out from behind him, and then he felt a huge hand clap him on the shoulder.

"Severus, I 'aven' seen ya out on the grounds fer a long time! 'Ow's life treatin' ya?" said Hagrid in a friendly manner. Severus had long been friends with the game keeper, he was probably the only member of the staff that Severus would fully count as a friend. 

Severus looked up at him, not smiling but not scowling, his usual expression when talking to Hagrid. "I'm fair, Hagrid. Fair enough, anyway."

"Was ya goin' fer a walk?" asked the giant man. 

"As a matter of fact, I was," said Severus, glad that he had come up with that excuse beforehand.

"D'ya mind if I come with ya? I 'ave to walk 'round the forest's edge anyway. Part of me job, gotta check the perimeter of the grounds," Hagrid said with pride. Severus knew he was very proud to work for Dumbledore, and he took his job very seriously. Severus agreed to go with him.

They walked down the gravel path to the gate, then turned right and walked around the forest's edge, Hagrid's eyes were trained on the forest, but he still chatted jovially with Severus. They discussed the giants that Hagrid had been visiting for the past few summers, and how classes were going for the both of them. 

Severus had just begun to forget about the true purpose of his walk when Hagrid stopped suddenly, his eyes off of the forest and on something ahead of him. He held out his arm in front of Severus to stop him.

"We best turn 'round," said Hagrid gently. Severus looked ahead of him to see Cassi sitting perched on a rock at the forest's edge, her knees pulled up to her chin and her eyes closed. "She'll want to be left alone, the poor thing."

"You've talked to her?" asked Severus in disbelief. Cassi hardly socialized with anyone, but he supposed it wouldn't be so radical a change if she were to talk with Hagrid, as she was out on the grounds quite a bit and he was easy to talk to.

"Yeh, we've talked a fair few times," said Hagrid, turning around. Severus followed him, interested.

"Why does she come out here?" he asked, trying to sound casual. Hagrid looked at him hard, as if trying to figure out his motive.

"She likes to be alone sometimes. Sometimes she comes out 'ere to talk. Summit' is botherin' her, but she won' tell me what. I think teachin' has put a bit of a strain on 'er, it's 'ard the first few years, ya know. Maybe you should ask 'er," suggested Hagrid helpfully, but Severus shook his head.

"Somehow I don't think she would appreciate that," said Severus in a very detached sort of way. Hagrid was about to say something, but a crash and a scream was heard at that moment. It had come from near the lake, and both Severus and Hagrid had turned around that direction, trying to see what was going on. They then ran that way, over a slight hill, and a peculiar scene lay before them. 

A giant spider, by the looks of it, an Acromantula was poised near the lake, chasing the few students around it who were trying to enjoy their weekend. A tree lay on the ground, which had to have been the crash they heard. Severus took his wand from his belt. Before he could start down there, Cassi was by his side, wand already out.

"Hagrid, go get the Headmaster please," she said, her voice holding a bit of authority Snape hadn't heard there before. Hagrid looked uneasy at leaving them to this monster, but obeyed and ran off to the giant wooden doors on the other side of the castle.

"Snape, get the kids away from the spider. They'll listen to you better than they will me," she explained as they ran down the hill and approached the giant spider. It snapped it pincers menacingly at the students. 

"Fine, you distract it," he said and she nodded, that being her plan all along. They split at the bottom of the hill, Cassi running to the spider, and Severus calling the students away from the beast. They ran to him and he led them half way around the castle at a run, the group racing over the dying grass of the grounds.

"If anyone's been hurt, go to the nurse. Otherwise, go back to your Common Rooms," he said, very out of breath, but then turned back. The students followed his commands, heading into the school severely shaken. While he ran back around the castle to the lake, he heard the spider scream in anger, a high pitched roar. He berated himself for leaving Cassi with the thing; not even the most skilled of wizards should handle one of those creatures alone.

He finally came upon the scene he had left. The spider had moved away from the black lake, and Cassi was standing back, hitting it with spells of different colors, yet all of them reflecting off of the spider's skin. It was far too magical to be affected by spells, but they had succeeded in angering it greatly. It took a great step forward and knocked Cassi sideways with one of its long hairy legs. The spider took another step and stood over its prey, clicking its pincers and casting it's dark shadow over her body.

Severus took a deep breath and pointed his wand at it, muttering a string of words under his breath and hitting it with a yellow light. The light wrapped itself around the beast, holding it back. This spell would keep it at bay for about a minute, then it would fail. Cassi shook herself, stood up, and ran close enough to Severus for her to talk to him.

"There's no way we're going to get this thing off the grounds alive, it's been driven mad. We have to kill it," he shouted to her. She nodded and knelt down, pulling a dagger from the near the hem of her robe. 

"Hold it like that for just a bit more," she called to him, and he nodded and concentrated on the spell, secretly thinking that she was either very brave or seriously mentally disturbed, or perhaps a bit of both. 

While Cassi jogged up to the Acromantula, she tapped her dagger with her wand, saying '_Dirumpo_' in a quiet voice, then stuck her wand in her back in sash. The giant spider was stomping like mad, able to move but not able to go anywhere. She ducked under it, immediately jumping away from a leg and a pincer. Then, with as much strength as she could muster, she drove her dagger into the monster's neck. She shot out from under it in a run. Severus' spell failed at that moment, and the spider ran after her. 

Cassi ran to Severus, grabbing his wrist and pulling him with her. "Run," she told him simply, and both set off, making sure to keep away from the castle. Cassi's black hair whipped around her as she ran, and her robes fluttered in the breeze. She was breathing hard and the lack of oxygen was making her head spin. 

The spider was fiercely annoyed with them, and had almost caught up with them in a fit of anger when it suddenly stopped. Cassi continued to run, and Severus followed her lead. She pushed him down, then fell down herself, covering the back of her head with her hands. Severus barely had time to wonder why she did this when a huge explosion was heard, and a burst of wind blew over them both, small rocks and twigs beating against them. And it was over.

Cassi and Severus lay there in the grass, breathing hard from running so much, trying to regain the strength to stand. Finally Cassi looked over at Severus. 

"Are you ok?" she asked, still trying to catch her breath.

"I believe so," he said, looking up to see her, then sitting up entirely. "And you?"

"A few scratches and bruises, I think, but nothing major." She tried to sit up, but groaned and grasped her side. She shook her head and let go immediately, then stood up without so much as a grimace. Severus stood too, and looked back at the creature.

It was still a scary sight. Its legs were splayed out and it's black body twitched. There was an enormous crater on its neck where the dagger had been, and it oozed black blood, soaking the yellowing grass around it, the sun sparkling off it.

Cassi looked over at it and wrinkled her nose. "_Receptus_," she called out, and immediately her dagger returned to her, the handle flying perfectly into her palm.

"It's indestructible, the best one I have," she said. Severus gave her a questioning look. "I placed an Explosion Curse on it, so it blew up while still remaining in tact. We couldn't curse the Acromantula, so I cursed this. It worked," she said, smiling. She bent down and replaced the dull, iron-colored dagger at the hem of her robe.

"And you carry around a weapon why?" he asked, thinking that if she wasn't mad, then she was certainly paranoid. 

"You can never be too careful. I would think you of all people know that, Snape," she said, as both remembered that they were supposed to hate the other. Cassi took a step forward, but her ankle gave out and she fell, unfortunately, right into Severus' arms, who caught her in shock.

"Sorry," she mumbled. "I twisted my ankle in that last run."

"I think you need to go see Madame Pomfrey," he said to her, trying to keep any tone of concern out of his words, but not completely succeeding. "You're rib is cracked too. I watched you stand."

"No, no I'll be fine. And my rib is fine too," she said, but he gave her a slight nudge, and she took in a sharp breath.

He helped her stand up properly again. "Well, you should at least go for the cut on your face. It looks deep." He cupped her chin with his free hand and gently turned her head, looking at the gash across her cheekbone.

"Snape," she said softly, "I've been taking care of myself since forever. I'm used to cuts and bruises. I'll be fine. I just need your help getting up to the castle. From that point on I'll walk on my own. I wouldn't want to ruin your reputation as an uncaring bastard." He let go of her chin.

"Alright," he said, letting her lean on his arm, though not really burdening him, as she was too light to do that. They set off for the castle slowing, not talking at all. When they reached the doors, they swung open, seemingly on their own, but the two saw that it was Hagrid, Dumbledore, McGonagall and Harper at the door.

"Did you already defeat it?" asked Dumbledore, his eyes shining.

"Yes. I'm sorry Hagrid," Cassi said as earnestly as possible. She felt a little bad about having to kill a magical creature, especially a spider. She knew he had some friends who were spiders, and she hoped that this creature wasn't related to his friends, or one of them.

"'S ok," he said, smiling at her.

"I'll be out to help you in a second, Dumbledore. I'm helping, uh Miss Talin to the nurse," he said quickly and Dumbledore nodded. Cassi glared at Severus and he looked back at her pointedly.

"I'll help her, Snape," said Simon, and he held out his hand to her. She took it without so much as looking at Snape, then they continued down the hall. Severus watched them for a moment, then turned and led Dumbledore and McGonagall to the body of the spider. As they walked, McGonagall patted him on the shoulder, and he looked at her strangely, trying to read her eyes to see what she knew. She only smiled sympathetically at him.

~

By the time the sun had set that night, the body of the creature had been cleaned up by Ministry wizards, Hagrid had been consoled, and Cassi had seen the nurse and returned to her classroom to finish the test she was making. She scribbled down the last details of it furiously as she thought of how Snape had tricked her into seeing the nurse. She hated being helped, she really did. It had nearly killed her to ask Snape to help her to the castle, but she couldn't have gotten there any other way. And Simon had been so concerned about her it was almost unnerving. She didn't like getting attached to people like that, it would only make things harder if she decided to leave. 

She stacked her papers neatly on the desk, making sure everything was in order. When that was done, she picked up her book she had been reading about the history of the Dark Arts over the last seventy years, and flipped to page sixty-five where she had left off. Just as she was starting to get into it, she heard a hard knock on her door.

"Who could that possibly be?" said Cassi sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "Come in!" Severus Snape walked into the room, arms folded and eyes darting from her to the floor nervously. She set down her book, interested in what he might have to say that was making him so nervous.

Severus cleared his throat. "I, uh, was wondering how you were doing." He sounded as if he wasn't really concerned, like he was just going through the motions and trying to be polite.

"Oh," she said disappointed, and she sat back in her chair. "I'm fine. I've got more bandages than I need on me, but I'm fine. I would have been fine without going to the Hospital Wing, thank you very much."

"Was your rib broken?" he retorted.

Cassi paused. "Yes. But ribs heal easily, I still would have been fine. And now my ankle is wrapped up tight and it's useless for walking." She paused and gave him a hard look. "Alright, it's my turn for a question. What were you doing out on the grounds this morning? And don't say 'Oh just taking a walk' like you take them everyday, because I know you don't. You were spying on me, weren't you?"

"It's funny how you think I would waste my time with you. It's almost humorous. No, actually, I was taking a walk with Hagrid. You're not his only friend," he said bitterly.

"So then you were talking to him about me, otherwise you wouldn't know that I've been talking to him. You just lost at your own game, Snape," she said, crossing her arms and glaring at him.

Severus walked up to her desk and placed both his hands on it. "I don't care what you think, I wasn't out there to find you. You just happened to become a topic in our conversation because we saw you sulking on that rock," he growled in a deep voice. His eyes flashed.

"You've been watching me since I got here. I'm sick of it. I was beginning to think that I had actually seen a human side of you this afternoon, but it must have been another façade. Well I must congratulate you, The Man of Many Masks. I'm not sure who you think you're kidding, but you're not tricking me into believing that you are capable of compassionate emotions, oh great Potions Master," she growled back at him.

"I'm simply being myself, you may take it or leave it. And I'm not the one with masks. Perhaps your reflection in the mirror can help find out whom I'm referring to." He stiffened considerably, and took his hands off her desk. "Dumbledore says there is to be a meeting tomorrow morning about the Acromantula. Good _night, _Cassandra." He had raised his voice for the last sentence, then stormed out of the room.

"He is such a robot," she said to herself, and she slammed her book down and angrily walked off to her room with a slight limp. She muttered to herself as she slammed through all the doors, giving her bedroom door a particularly hard slam. She saw her reflection as she passed the mirror on her way to her bed. Her eyes stared back at her, alive with anger. The cut on her cheek had been healed so it didn't mar her face anymore, but her cheeks were pink. She hadn't thought Snape had gotten to her quite as much as he had. It wasn't fair; when she insulted him, it rolled off of him like a raindrop, but when the tables turned, she ended up all emotional. She couldn't look at the reflection anymore, so she threw a towel over the mirror. She sat on her bed, fuming, but decided it would do no good to simply sit there and dwell on it, so she busied herself with cleaning her nightstand up. She reorganized her potions and hairbrush, then moved her meager jewelry; a pair of earrings and a necklace which she was particularly fond of, but did not wear. She picked up the necklace and studied the amulet on it. 

It was a beautiful iron snake twisted around a heart. The details on it were magnificent; each scale on the snake was visible, and it's little beady eyes glared back at her. She never wore it anymore; she used to wear it when she was younger as the last scrap of her past that she had, but when she decided to let go, she had taken off the necklace. Still, it made her feel nice, like there was something special about it, but she didn't know what, so she set it down in the drawer of her nightstand so it wouldn't distract her anymore.

~

Meanwhile, Severus tried to calm himself. He had come into her classroom genuinely concerned (as much as he didn't show it, but it wasn't her place to question his motives), and he had come out thoroughly insulted. It had been awhile since he had actually allowed himself to get this angered, and he didn't know why she affected him like this. She took his insults as if she had heard them a thousand times, yet he gets all riled up when she insults him? It didn't seem right to Severus. He scowled at the stone floor as he walked aimlessly through the halls.

And since when did McGonagall become so interested in what Severus thought? If he had known she was that damn psychic, he would have remembered never to reveal so much as a scowl to her. Where did she get off thinking that he was…_fond_ of Cassi? He stopped when he thought about this, and had to actually sit down on the base of a statue with his head in his hands in order to think about this. He had no feelings for her, none at all. It wasn't possible. McGonagall had to be wrong. He couldn't have fallen for her. He couldn't. He couldn't. He could. He had.


	4. Hide from the Truth

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Author's Note: I do not own any of the characters, with the exception of Simon Harper and Cassandra Talin. And the elusive _Her_. All other characters belong to JK Rowling, and no money is being made from this fan fiction. If there was, you'd be on my paying list, so aren't you lucky?

As a side note: The reason some of you think it takes me a bit to put out chapters is because I'm actually writing this as I go, and it takes awhile for things to come together. Also, I'm co-teaching at church, relations are flying in from overseas next week, the week after I'm going to Russia, and then I go back to no man's land for a few days, so all in all, it will probably be four more weeks before another chapter. I'm very sorry about the delay, and I'm trying to work on the chapter as much as possible before things get hectic. 

Also, I love reviews! Thanks be to all who have reviewed! Also, I think it's neato when you tell me what you think is going to happen. Don't worry about affecting the plot, I've got a plot sheet already devised, but I need to know how things are looking from an outsiders standpoint. Alright, I know Fanfiction has been down a lot, but if you've read Chapter 4 before you could review, I would still appreciate reviews. Thanks!

Ok, ok, enough from me, here's chapter 4!

****

~

Chapter 4: Hide from the Truth

Severus continued to sit on the base of the statue for some time, turning things over in his mind. His mind was in such a state of shock and disarray that if he stood and walked, he would have probably gotten lost. A horrible thought had struck him, one that doesn't go away for quite some time.

He, Severus Snape, had fallen hard for the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher.

He hated it. All around the school he was known for his sneering attitude and ability to show no compassion for a single soul, yet he had emotions for that argumentative teacher? Cassi wasn't his type; stubborn, compulsive, and damn it, she was pretty too, which certainly wasn't part of his type. Not that he had a type. _What had she done to him?_ Severus was a steadfast, sarcastic, and morbid soul, and she had most assuredly done something to him. Perhaps it was a potion in his drink, something surely within her being to do.

Severus stood again at this thought, though still somewhat dazed. He shook his head to clear his mind, and he walked on, with nowhere in particular to go, still wildly entertaining the thought that he was under a potion, or maybe a spell. Cassi was good at spells, he had seen that just earlier that day. Yes, that must be it. Please let that be it.

His heart sunk horribly as a new thought hit him. Why, of all people, would she choose to charm/drug him? She hated every thin bone in his body; she most certainly would not want to have him. This occurred to him rather harshly in two ways; first, this completely obliterated his magic-induced love theory, and second, it would be the reason Cassi would never look at him as he looked at her. What would she want with him? He was bitter, stubborn, and above all, emotionally scarred (as much as he didn't want to admit it, only because it would admit having emotions and them being hurt). 

"Leave me alone, girl!" he shouted out to the hallway. The sounds of his deep voice echoing off the carved stone walls came back and shocked him. He hadn't realized how much he had wanted to shout at something. He hoped to God that no one heard him; it had been quite awhile since he had lost control like that. The VERY last thing he needed was someone else knowing that his feelings for Professor Talin were anything but the purest of hatreds. Yet there was someone else who knew, and that someone would be the Transfiguration teacher. What would she say if she knew that she had been right about him? 

"Severus?" called a mature voice down the hall, fast footsteps accompanying it. Severus jumped at the sound of the voice he had been thinking of, and whirled around, pulling a blank face.

"Minerva," he said in acknowledgement. He couldn't help but think of how all the teachers used first name basis with each other when they weren't around students, with the exception of Cassi. And there she was in his thoughts again. Damn her.

"Severus, I'm sorry to disturb you, you looked like you were deep in thought, but I just wanted to see if you were alright from this afternoon," she asked, now walking with him. He bowed his head to shield his face from her with his lank hair; no more expression reading would be going on, he would not have it.

"I'm fine," he said tersely, and she remained silent for some time.

"What do you think of Professor Harper?" she asked curiously after the silence had passed.

"I have no opinion of that stupid git," said Snape, visibly tensing as a new emotion lapped over him like an ocean wave. Jealously as he had never felt it swept through him, making him angry from head to foot. Only fifteen minutes ago he discovered that there might be a possibility that he loved Cassi, and he was already jealous over a worthless prat? This was simply more than he could stand, and Snape wanted to return to his dungeons to think this over. Logically. Something he yearned for in this time of revelation was logic and stability, and perhaps a good sleeping potion.

"I see. No opinion, eh? Hmm, right," she said skeptically, yet still maintaining that matter-of-fact tone she always had. "Severus, if you ever need to talk, you know where my classroom is." She had turned to walk off when Snape spoke.

"Minerva, I'm not sure where you've gotten the notion that there might be some… _attraction_, I suppose that is the word, between Professor Talin and myself, but I can assure you that is simply isn't true," he said, sounding as sure and cold as he could, hoping against hope that this would change her mind.

"Severus, I may be old, but I'm not blind. I can see perfectly well how much attention you pay to her, how much time you spend thinking about her. Don't worry though," she said, a slight smile on her very serious face, "it's not like I'm off to tell the school."

"A _rumor_ like that would be devastating to my reputation to the school board, as well as among the faculty and students," he said tensely, still trying to prove her wrong, though his attempts were becoming desperate. 

"Of course. You are Severus Snape, the Potions Master, who knows perfectly well that relationships among the staff have not been encouraged in the past, though _not _against the rules. Perhaps the Potions Master should think about the last part of that sentence," she said, and she took the next right and disappeared down a shadowy hallway.

"That did not go well," he said in a quiet growl, then he looked around to figure out where he was so he could find his way back down to his cold dungeons. A statue of a wizard with seven fingers told him that he was on the ground floor, and only had to find the nearest stairs to descend down to the bottom of the school.

In a few short moments, Severus was back in his pungent and dark dungeons. Torches lit themselves as he shut the heavy wooden door behind him and made his way to his desk. The light flickered over the gleaming desks and made the jars containing organs and liquids shimmer in the inconstant light. He absentmindedly picked up his quill to grade papers, but found that there were none to be graded. He had been especially efficient this year so he would have more time to watch the new teachers, but now this had come back to get him when he all he wanted was to escape the new teachers, especially the one…

"That's it, I can not stand this any longer. No more," he said in frustration, and he walked into his office and picked up a flask from a shelf behind his desk. He uncorked it and brought it to his lips, then threw his head back and took a swallow of it. He then opened the door in his office that led to his room, and threw himself on his bed, having an instantaneous dreamless sleep.

~

Cassi, however, was not having an easy time getting to sleep. Severus' voice was echoing around in her memory, angering her as she attempted to sleep. He was the source of most of her problems. When she had come to this job, she had known that she might not get along with everyone, but she didn't know that she would be making enemies with the Head of Slytherin, and that he would be mentally tormenting her. The last thing she needed was someone waltzing about the school throwing cutting remarks at her that actually had basis. Anger coursed through her veins like an electric shock.

She took her pillow out from under her head and covered her face with it, then screamed in frustration. She then promptly put her pillow against the headboard and sat up, grabbing her wand off the nightstand and using the 'Lumos' spell. With another glance at the nightstand, she let her eyes flicker over her potions, now arranged neatly. She closed her eyes in defeat, and reached out for the nearest one, a blue one. She drank a bit with ease, then picked up her other one, the green one. She stared at it hard.

"Almost out," she said, and she became worried. She needed this potion more than the other, but it would be impossibly hard to brew without _certain _people knowing what it was. This bottle of liquid was very important to her, she needed it, but she only had enough to last her to about mid-November, then she would be out, a thought that made her shudder. She swallowed a bit of this potion too, then fixed her pillow, extinguished her wand, and tried to go to sleep.

~

The teacher's meeting started early that Sunday morning, and Severus arrived early enough to get a seat near Dumbledore at the table in the Staff room. He had slept well that night, and had resolved to do nothing about his 'situation'. Dumbledore and Severus chatted for a bit while waiting for the others to get there. Unfortunately for him, the next person in the room was Cassi, who was about to seat herself at the opposite end of the table when Dumbledore called out to her.

"Professor Talin, would you be so kind as to sit over here so that you can give your account of yesterday's events easier?" he asked warmly. She nodded and sat next to him, which meant she was opposite Snape as Dumbledore was at the head of the table. He turned his eyes to the table and she did the same, but for an entirely different reason.

This was even more torturous than Snape could have imagined. He wasn't acting like himself; he was too caught up in trying not to show anything that he forgot to be himself. Normally he would have continued to talk to Dumbledore to show off how much he was respected, but now all he could do was stare at the boards that made up the table.

At that moment, Harper walked through the door, seating himself next to Cassi.

"Hello Simon," she said kindly, though in a low voice. "How are you doing?"

"I think I should be the one asking you that, Cassi," he said kindheartedly. "After yesterday and all…" He watched her curiously.

"Well, I'm perfectly fine, don't worry about me so," she said in a nervous way.

"Sorry, it's just…" started Simon, but he glanced over at Severus and let his sentence die. Severus had looked up just enough to glare at Simon viciously, scaring the poor man into silence. Simon ran a hand through his dark brown hair nervously and fell silent.

Luckily, more teachers flooded in, and the meeting began as Dumbledore stood to address them, and they fell silent instantly.

"Fellow colleagues, as most of you have heard, an Acromantula broke into the grounds on Saturday, coming dangerously close to injuring or killing at least 12 people, two of them being teachers. Very few creatures are able to break into the grounds on their own free will, which leads me to believe that another person was responsible for this attack. This explains the creature's level of insanity, and the deliberate attack to these specific grounds. I have no reason to suspect anyone inside the castle for doing such a thing, all teachers were either in the lounge with me or in their classrooms. The more advanced students were either attacked or in their Common rooms; everyone was accounted for." Dumbledore spoke with a powerful aire, and all attention was commanded to him as the staff soaked in every word of his speech.

"Severus, did you notice which way the spider came from?" asked Dumbledore. Severus sat up importantly.

"It came from the west end of the forest, or at least that was the direction it was walking away from when I got to it," said Snape, relieved that he was able to act as he normally did. Perhaps it wouldn't be too hard covering up this… affliction of his. That was the best word for it, affliction.

"That rules out some of the theories then. Right. Cassandra, tell me, was the structure of the spider normal for one native to this area? Any specific markings?" His eyes shone as he asked.

Cassi started when he called on her, and she looked up at him nervously, then started to speak. "The structure was exactly that of one found in this country, though no markings. This either means that the outsider trained a native or used a wild one. I assume this is what you meant?" she said very quietly.

"Quite right. That was precisely my point. Alright, if you don't mind, would you please completely repeat your story for the other teachers, and let's see what we've got, Severus. Cassandra can help you," said Dumbledore, sitting back down in his chair. Severus retold his story, straight facts, up until the point where Cassi and him had fallen into the grass, which he skipped. Cassi corrected him at some points, but was quiet while Snape narrated. Everyone nodded along, eyes wide.

Dumbledore addressed a few parts of their story, then dismissed the meeting. All the teachers walked off to breakfast, Snape staying far away from Cassi, who had fallen behind in attempts to cheer Hagrid up. Hagrid eventually smiled at something she said, and Cassi folded her arms, pleased with her success. By that time, they had reached the Hall, where she seated herself silently next to Severus, who was ignoring her completely.

Cassi noticed his cold manner, and became equally cold. All was going fine until Snape turned to her, smirking.

"Ham?" he said politely offered, gesturing to the plate before her.

"Not in the slightest. You may partake of the dead animal if you like, but not I," she said, her voice silky with anger. He smirked again and took a bit of the ham. Cassi rolled her eyes, and Snape heard her mutter something under her breath, but he couldn't quite make out what it meant. He got the gist of it though, and smiled. As long as she didn't suspect anything, he thought he could survive. With luck, she would be gone by the next year and he wouldn't have to do this for more than a few months. Meanwhile, he was having some trouble controlling his mind, as it kept reminding him of some of the finer elements of her beauty. He poked his ham viciously, as if threatening to do the same to his memory.

After Cassi had finished her muffin, she stood without a word to Severus and headed off to her room, bound and determined to find something to do. She decided a more detailed analysis of her next lesson might be needed. When she reached her stone room, she lit the repaired chandelier with a flick of her wand and sat down at her desk. A sudden overwhelming feeling overtook her, and she reached into the second drawer to her left and pulled out a small bottle of her pearly green potion. She sighed and looked at it.

"What are you doing to yourself?" she asked in a whisper to herself, then took a bit of the potion. She was all too aware of the dark circles under her eyes, how hallow her cheeks looked, her inability to focus, but she did her best to ignore it.

She had no choice but to ignore it.

~

Two weeks passed. Halloween had been fun, the students enjoyed the feast immensely, and they also enjoyed a homework free weekend from Defense class, as Cassi had given her test. The test was part essay, part performance, where the student had to put up a shield according to the level of spell that Cassi cast at them. Most students did fairly well, with the exception of a few, like Neville, who had dropped in a dead faint before Cassi even got the words out of her mouth. She had often gotten the impression that a few of her students were afraid of her, some more so than others. Luckily, he was revived a few minutes later, and tried again.

Severus was having a difficult time handling this new 'affliction'. He couldn't be angrier with himself for allowing _it _to happen, and in turn, he had become even more ruthless in his manner towards Cassi, who was equally as angry at him for being so nasty. They had once again taken to hissing angry words at each other in the hallway, and shooting evil glares at each other. It was no secret in the school that they fought and hated each other, and Cassi found a surprising number of supporters among the students; most of them had been bullied or scolded by him, and had long wanted to see him get his. The Slytherins, no matter how much they respected Cassi, had to stand by the Head of their house, so theirs was the only House that ever had anything bad to say about her, though it was seldom that she was talked about at all, as her vanishing act was working quite well.

During one class when they had been learning how to stop their attacker, a Slytherin student became frustrated with his spell, and slammed his wand down. Cassi looked up from her stool (where she had been staring at the floor), and walked over to the boy's table.

"What's wrong, Smith?" she asked, pulling up a chair next to him and sitting stiffly in it.

"This is stupid," he growled. Cassi bristled.

"Now now, you wouldn't be saying that if a fully grown wizard was attacking you with a wand," said Cassi, prepared to help him master the spell.

"It's stupid, I don't get it. Besides, Professor Snape says it's useless too," he said, still grumpy. Cassi leaned over.

"Does he now?" she said curiously, keeping her motive hidden from her voice.

"Yeah. He said that you weren't teaching the right spells, and that he would expect better spells from flobberworms than what we're doing," Smith said, though a little uneasily. Cassi, however, smiled and patted the boy's head.

"Well I can assure you that this will be useful one day. Now, let's work on this spell together, shall we?" she said kindly, and he nodded.

When the last class dismissed, Cassi sorted their papers out and locked her room up, ready to go to dinner. The child's words were still ringing in her mind. She was going to have to talk to Snape about this, but first, she had an idea. Instead of continuing down the stairs, she turned to the second floor and went to the gargoyle in the wall. Since she was part of the staff, she now knew the password to it, saving her a lot of time. A short hallway stretched in front of her, and off to her right was Dumbledore's office.

Cassi tapped lightly on the door, and Dumbledore called for her to open it. She did so meekly enough, but when Dumbledore smiled at her, she became a little less so, seating herself carefully in a chair across from his desk, where he was sitting.

"How may I help you?" he asked, eyes twinkling and a smile on his face.

"Well, Headmaster, I came across an idea today, inspired by one of my more frustrated students," she started, slightly shaky, and hoping that he would like her idea.

"One of the best inspirations. Continue."

"Well, the student was rather frustrated with a spell, and he didn't seem to think that it would be useful in real life, so I thought it might be a wise idea to show them just how useful this will be. Which brings me to my question; would it be alright if I used an abandoned hallway as an obstacle course?" Cassi spoke fast, the words tumbling out in her light Russian accent, and Dumbledore smiled at her.

"Of course, my dear, of course. Excellent idea, it really is. In fact, if you asked Severus, I'm sure he would find you a suitable hallway, as he knows these halls as well as I do," he said, eyes still twinkling at her idea.

"Snape?" she asked hesitantly.

"He doesn't bite, nor does he hate you as much as you think. He just…doesn't get along with newcomers so well. Don't worry, just ask him, I'm sure it will be fine," said Dumbledore in a reassuring way, and Cassi stood to leave.

"Oh, Professor?" called out Dumbledore as she was about to leave. "Are you well? You look a bit under the weather."

Cassi touched her cheeks and sighed. "I-I'm just…tired." She sounded convincing enough, but Dumbledore still looked concerned. 

"Maybe you should go see Madam Pomfrey," he said, slightly skeptical of her excuse.

"Nono, no, I'm perfectly alright, I'll just catch up on my sleep later, thank you," she quietly mumbled and she slipped out of the room as Dumbledore nodded to her. 

He sat back in his chair and sighed thoughtfully.

Cassi ran out into the hallway, walking quickly off to dinner, when she spied a swish of black robes coming out of a smaller hallway and into a bigger one, and Cassi felt her blood boil as she watched Snape stalk down the hall darkly.

"Snape, may I have a word?" Cassi called out, and he stopped without looking back, waiting for her to catch up. Her entire secretive demeanor was gone as she was going to confront him.

"The most interesting thing happened today, wouldn't you know, a student got frustrated in my class, saying that it was stupid and that you thought I wasn't challenging the students enough," she growled in a low whisper. Severus remained silent, confirming her story.

"Listen, I happen to be doing a damn good job with those children, and I don't need you saying lowlife things about me," she said, slightly louder and taking a step closer to him.

"For your information, _Talin,_ I do not go around trying to blacken your name, I've only said that one thing while leafing through one of my student's assignment. Your name doesn't need any more blackening," he growled back, trying very hard to keep his mind on the argument and off her blue-violet eyes.

"What do you mean?" she snapped.

"It's fairly obvious, someone one with your quick mind ought to catch onto things like that. You skulk about all day, hiding in your room, and people wonder about you," he said, his eyes narrow slits of black abyss.

"I do not skulk, I'm perfectly fine-" she began.

"You don't look it. There are shadows under your eyes, your hands are shaking-"

"Because I'm infuriated!"

"AND," he said louder over her interjection, "you're cheek are sunken. Either you're not eating right or you need sleep. Or both."

"I eat perfectly fine, I just haven't been sleeping much lately, so curse me. It's none of you damn business anyway. But, I also have a question," she said, her tone changing from irritation to an ironically sweet.

"What?"

"Where's a good abandoned hallway?" she asked, still patronizingly sweet.

"Third floor hasn't been properly moved into, try that. Why?" he asked, now highly suspicious.

"I'm going to use it as an obstacle course. I got the idea when the student didn't think we would use this in real life. So I have you to thank for that," she said, her tone so evilly sweet that Snape was worried. He was even more so when she stood on her tiptoes slightly and kissed him on the cheek, then walked off to the Hall, leaving him standing there. For about five minutes he stood there blankly, blinking and wondering what the hell had just happened. The spot on his sallow cheek was still tingling, and he mentally slapped himself. He had most certainly _not_ authorized that kiss, not in the slightest. _She really should not take liberties with me_, he thought grumpily, though another voice in his head popped up, the one he would dearly love to murder. _Oh Severus, you know you liked that._

As soon as Cassi rounded a corner, she burst into fits of laughter as she remembered the look of total shock on his face, slightly mixed with horror and fright. His eyes had gotten very wide, and his face very pale, making him almost look dead. It was all Cassi could do not to double up in laughter.

"Oh my, that was worth it. Mind you, now I'm probably infected with scummy icy-hearted bastardness bacteria. But it was worth it, that look was priceless," she said through giggles, coming up to Hall now, and composing herself. She knew she had really broken character to do that, but that's what made it so shocking to him.

She ate dinner with a smile that night, but immediately returned to her room for her potion. Only a few centimeters left…

~ 

Within another week, Cassi had found herself a particularly dark and dusty hallway on the third floor. She had also enchanted a few of the suits of armor to act as attackers, though they were to be immediately disabled by the correct spell. That had been a tricky spell to devise, but she had managed, though she couldn't help but think that if the Department of Experimental Charms ever got a hold of half the stuff she had created, they would have a field day. Dumbledore was very open to every learning experience though, so she wouldn't have a problem with this. Just for review, she had scrounged up a few Boggarts from the darkest parts of the castle and transported them to her hall, hoping that that would be enough for a good go.

On that Friday, about halfway through November, Cassi waited eagerly for her class of fifth year Gryffindors to walk into class. She was perched on her stool, sitting rigidly as always, but she was smiling, putting a few of her students at ease.

After the bell rang and attendance was taken, she addressed the class. "Today, I've got a bit of a challenge for you, but I have no doubt in your capabilities, as long as you've been understanding what's been going on. So if you would kindly pick up your bags and take them with you, this will take all class period. Thank you, please follow me." With these words, she stood and opened the door of her classroom, leading the students out of it and up to the third floor. She caught a few worried expressions as they entered the dingy floor, only lit by a few stone pedestals at the beginning of the hall.

"Alright ladies and gentlemen, this is going to be a test of your skills. This exercise will show you how much we use what we learn, and how it applies to your life outside of Hogwarts. I've got this set up like an obstacle course, starting here and winding down the hall until you eventually come out a bit down the hallway here, basically making a horse-shoe type shape. I will be trailing behind you, grading you and making sure things don't get out of hand. So, who wants to go first?" Her eyes shone bright as she stared at the nervous faces.

"I will, Professor," volunteered a voice, and everyone's head turned to see Hermione raising her hand meekly.

"Good girl. Alright, you may go in when you're ready," offered Cassi, clipboard in hand with her wand ready in her sash.

Hermione nodded and lit her wand up, then started off. She started down the hallway, Cassi about fifteen paces behind her. The first thing they met was a Boggart, which immediately turned into a scolding teacher. As soon as Hermione tackled that, she quickly moved on and ran smack into a suit of armor, which was wielding a club. At first Hermione froze, but then she stuttered through the spell, and the suit froze, mid-swing. This continued on for some time, until eventually Hermione had the hang of it, but was still busy fending off two or three things at a time. Then it was over as she emerged into the original hallway, just a bit farther down from the nervous huddle of students. They clapped when they saw her.

"Full marks, Miss Granger. Well done," said Cassi, marking it down as she said this. Hermione grinned and both rejoined the group.

"Next!" she called, repeating the process until everyone had finished. Most had done pretty decently, and she promised them that they would have another go at it later, when they've had time to hone their skills a bit more. The bell rang as she finished the last person, and she dismissed the class and headed back to her room. It was a free period for her, and she decided to spend it outside. 

She grabbed her cloak off a hook and headed towards the giant wooden doors, pulling her cloak around her tightly as she felt the brisk November air whip around the door. She started out towards her rock, beginning to feel the drain of today's tiring experience. 

"Hogsmeade trip tomorrow," she reminded herself. _I've got to get the ingredients for my potion there, I can brew it the next day. How I'm going to get past Snape is beyond me, I'll have to ask for his facilities, damn it. I'll come up with something._

She arrived at her rock, sitting next to it and leaning her back against it, eyes set on the forest, watching it's dark interior. She could relate to it.

Cassi awoke early the next morning and got ready for her trip to Hogsmeade, deciding to leave her hair down today. She grabbed her cloak off it's hook by the towel-covered mirror (she didn't want to take the towel off of it anymore) and headed down to breakfast quietly, listening to the patter of her soft soled shoes across the hard stone. As she neared the Hall, she heard the click of boots on the stone, and she wondered who was behind her.

"Cassi, Cassi wait up!" called the voice, and she turned around to wait for Simon, relieved that it was just him. He jogged to catch up, then smiled jovially when he reached her side. "Are you an escort for Hogsmeade today?"

"Yes, are you?"

"Yup. Hey, do you want to meet up there later, say about halfway through?" he asked, eyes shining.

"Alright," she agreed in a quiet voice.

"Great, how about at the tavern?" Cassi nodded, and Simon beamed and walked with her to breakfast, both talking the entire way. Neither noticed Snape watching them contemptuously, busy hating himself more and more as he allowed himself to delve into the pools of jealousy in his heart.

Breakfast dismissed, and a majority of the older students lingered back, then crowded themselves in the Entrance Hall. McGonagall arrived a few minutes later, quieting the students down and checking over who all was going. While she did this, Cassi put on her cloak, pulling her hood up and backing away from the crowd, while still keeping an eye on them. She caught a glance of Simon talking enthusiastically to a group of students, and he looked up and winked at her. She smiled back, but found herself trying to get farther away from the crowd. Finally, McGonagall dismissed and Cassi and the other teachers walked alongside the students to town.

The air was brutally icy, and the trees and grass were dead, giving the grounds a drab look on this overcast day. Cassi liked it this way, and she enjoyed the walk, despite the fact that she had to break up a fight between a Slytherin and a Hufflepuff, and ended up deducting points from both.

The town wasn't far off, and the walk was short. The teachers needed only to escort them there, the students would return on their own before lunch, the store owners made sure of that, so Cassi immediately broke away from the group when she entered the colorful little town, and she entered a looming herb shop.

A bell above the door jingled when she entered the warm shop. The entire store was composed of aged and worn looking wood. Wooden shelves held different powders in boxes, and there were barrels full of things like bat eyes and sliced manticore hands. A wrinkly old man with blue eyes and gray hair came out of a back room when the bell sounded, and hobbled up to the counter.

"Need anything?" he asked in a hoarse, weak voice. There was a look in his eyes that made Cassi feel uneasy, and she touched her wand on her sash.

"Do you carry the things on this list?" she asked, handing him a worn piece of parchment from her pocket. He eyed the list and looked up suspiciously.

"What're you making?" he growled, though in a curious tone.

"It's the shopkeeper's place to sell, and the buyer's to buy. There does not need to be any socialization outside of this," she said, quite firm. He cowered under her serious stare and filled her order, placing it in a plain brown bag. She paid him what was owed, and left, having done this enough not to be fooled into telling him what she was making. She looked up at a clock on the chapel, she had spent a mere fifteen minutes in there, and she could continue with the rest of her shopping until about ten.

At 9:50, she started over to the tavern, trying to stay out of other people's way so no one bumped into her, but her efforts were in vain when she rounded a corner and ran straight into a man clad in black. Unfortunately, both lost their balance and fell back.

"Sorry," both murmured to the other, and Cassi looked up to see Snape shaking his head and standing up.

"Running somewhere, Talin, or do you just like attacking me?" he sneered, but he offered his hand to help her stand up. She rolled her eyes and took it, bringing her to her feet, her bag clutched in her hand tightly. Before either could say another thing to the other, Simon spotted them from across the street and walked over casually.

"Severus, Cassi," he said in greeting. Both of them realized they were still holding hands, and they let go at the same time.

"I'm off," Snape stated darkly, for Simon had turned to Cassi and touched her cheek very gently. With a swish of his cloak he was gone, leaving Cassi standing there like a statue.

"Sorry, you had dirt on your face from the fall, and that was the best way to get Snape away," he said with a laugh, and Cassi's face broke into a smile.

"It worked too, I congratulate you," she said, and they laughed as they walked into the tavern, both getting a butterbeer and talking about their classes. Cassi enjoyed talking to Simon, he was one of the few people she liked talking too, but she felt anxious about brewing this potion under Snape's nose. For some reason, she didn't want him to think the less of her if she found out what she had been taking, and this bothered her. Since when did she care what he thought? She mulled over this with the last sip of her butterbeer. 

Simon and Cassi paid, then walked back up to the castle, and split at the Entrance Hall. Cassi took her bag back to her room, and added a few ingredients from her suitcase to it, along with her ladle, then waited awhile to give Snape plenty of time to be back. In the meantime, she read a book from her Dark Arts shelf, though she found it to be boring and horribly repetitive of all her other books on the shelf, so she shut it and stared off into space for a bit. Finally, when she could stand it no longer, she left her room with her bag and went down to his cold dungeons.

When she reached his door, she froze before she knocked, her stomach filled with nervous butterflies which she tried to calm, but with no avail. With a deep breath she knocked, and she heard his deep voice call her in. When she pushed open the door, she looked around his classroom. Jars and bottles filled with who knows what parts of animals lined the room, and a few torches on the wall were lit and flickering across the black tables and stools of his classroom, their warmth lost in the wintry coldness of the room. It was altogether gloomy, but very neat and precise, yet somehow she had expected no less from him. Snape himself was at his desk, marking essays that he had assigned the weekend before. He was perched on a stool, lank black hair in his eyes, which were sharp with deep concentration, a fairly complimentary look for him, if it hadn't been so terrifying to her at the moment.

"Uh, Snape?" she asked in a quaking voice. He looked up and looked at her suspiciously.

"Yes, Miss Talin?"

"Well, I needed to brew a potion, but unfortunately I do not posses the facilities or the cauldron for it, so may I borrow that from you?" She stuttered through her question very fast, and her nervousness almost amused him.

"What potion?"

"Just something to rid me of this cold," she lied.

"Couldn't you get that from Madam Pomfrey?" he asked, his tone expectant of her.

"You know I don't like to ask her for things like that. Besides, I prefer to make my own, thank you," she said, eyes now glued to the floor.

"Fine, fine, just don't make a mess. There are spare cauldrons in the back closet. Try not to disturb me," he said, acting bored with her and returning to the essays. She sighed and set her bag on the back table in the corner, then went to the closet to get a cauldron. There was a medium sized one on the top shelf, and she stood on her tiptoes to reach it, and Snape glanced up at this time and watched her struggle to get it out, but eventually manage it. A stab of wild thoughts raced unbridled across his mind, but he halted them immediately to continue grading while she worked away silently, now perched on her stool.

Cassi had already cut, slice, and grated all her ingredients beforehand or the shopkeeper sold them to her like she needed them to be, so organizing the random things took no time at all. She didn't dare bring her instructions in case Snape read them over her shoulder, but she knew the recipe by heart, so that had no impact on it. She filled the cauldron with water from her wand, then lit the fire under it, bringing it to a gentle boil rather fast. She then proceeded to mix in her ingredients in order, one by one, very meticulous in her work, the soft bubbling of the cauldron lulling her into a calmer state. 

"You should take sleeping potions. The shadows under your eyes are still there," said a silky voice behind her, making her jump, though she noted that his voice did not hold any arrogant tone, nor sneer.

"I'm already taking a sleeping potion for it," she stammered out.

"Oh, that should benefit you some. So what exactly are you brewing?"

"Umm, I'm not sure exactly what it's called, as my old boss taught it to me, but it works," she lied again. He didn't really seem pleased with this answer, but accepted it quietly, watching her now stir her potion. He was standing very close to her, watching her in silence, and it was causing her hands to shake.

"Here," he said in a quiet voice, and he placed his hand on top of her stirring hand, "with this consistency, it's best to stir it _this_ way." Her hands shook harder, and he noticed this with mild surprise, but continued to stir in the opposite direction she that had been. Cassi closed her eyes for a second, trying to regain her composure, but was unsuccessful.

"Severus," she whispered to him, turning slightly to face him, and fully realizing how close they were when she noticed that his face was about two inches from hers. He held her gaze, looking deep into the blue-violet abyss of her eyes, and she was also staring into his eyes, losing herself in them. A delicate blush spread across her cheeks and she turned away from him to look at her potion, and he released her hand.

He turned to go back to his desk, but before he could, he had to say something. "You called me Severus, you realize," he said quietly, then returned to his desk. She swallowed hard, wondering how she let herself lose that much control, then looking down at her trembling hands. 

The potion was soon done though, and she emptied it into her bottles while it still steamed. She then washed her cauldron and put it back, then gathered the bottles and left the room in total and complete silence, butterflies still not vanquished.

Very soon it was dinnertime, and Snape was still not happy with the answer she had given, and he was trying in vain to remember where he had seen that potion. This bothered him all through dinner, in which Cassi did not attend. By the time it was over, it was a torturing curiosity, so he decided to consult the books. He left the Hall with quick steps, and flew down to his dungeons. Once there, he entered his office, scanning the spines of the books on his shelf for a book that would help him out. When he found the one he wanted, a dark blue one with a dingy cover and yellow, water-wrinkled pages, he pulled it down off the shelf and set it on his desk, and settled in his chair. He opened the book with a crackling of the spine, and flipped through the pages, going through the entire book once, then going back through it again before finding the page he wanted. He scanned the page, then reread it to make sure he was reading it correctly.

"Cassi," he breathed with a moan, "you don't know what you're getting yourself into with this." For an indecisive moment, Snape debated with himself as to what he should do, then he stood resolutely and swept out of the dungeons, leaving the book open on his desk

**__**

Potente Potion Number 585: Anxiety Relief Potion

This potion is designed to relieve the drinker of stress and worry, but should be used in extreme moderation. Only to be used in the most dire of cases, but may become addictive. Not to be taken for long periods of time. DO NOT mix with other potions.

Coloring: Pearly green

Brewing time: 30 minutes to 2 hours (depending on experience)

Side Effects: Nausea, fatigue, sleeplessness, dizziness, loss of weight and/or appetite, depression (discontinue if occurs), and death…

~

Severus shook his head as he walked through the hall, wondering how he hadn't noticed it before. He worried about how exactly he should word this, as it was a slightly delicate situation. Before he could formulate the right words to describe what he needed to, Snape found himself at her classroom door, and was relieved to see that her lights were still on. He rapped on the door, but no sound came from within. He knocked again, but no call for him came. Even when Cassi was infuriated with him, she always let him into her classroom. Snape's worry mounted, so his only course of action was to let himself in. He placed a hand on the cool doorknob and opened the door with a creak, then stepped in.

A black robed figure lay by the desk on the cold stone floor, long hair splayed out over her arms and face. Completely motionless.


	5. Eyes like Mirrors

****

Author's Note: I don't own anyone except Cassandra Talin, Simon Harper, and Her. Psh, and even they don't listen to me. Everyone else is JK's creation, and I'm sorry I didn't state that in the first two chapters, but I think you got the drift.

This chapter is very long, sorry, but my characters wouldn't shut up. It's also been awhile since I've put out a chapter, and I apologize for that as well. I was in Russia, then off to a town in the middle of nowhere, then home. Oh yeah, I throw around a few Russian words in this chapter, and since not many people speak that language, I'll go ahead and translate for you (Note: The spelling of these words are phonetical in the story so you can say them, plus its hard to put them in Russian because its an entirely different alphabet).

Nyeht= No

Da= Yes

Pazhalsta= Please

vi guhvahretie pah-russki?= Do you speak Russian?

Nein= No (German)

Reviews are wonderful!

Chapter 5: Eyes like Mirrors

The color drained out of Severus' face as he stared blankly at the black huddle on the ground. He had just seen Cassi a few hours ago, still very much conscious. He begged for him not to be too late.

He strode over to her, and knelt by her side, and rolled her from her side onto her back, then shifted her so that she was half laying on his lap, half being held. He knew she could be half hysterical when she woke up anyway, and there was no way he was going to let her make a run for it. Cassi greatly resembled a limp porcelain doll, except an emaciated one. She was as pale as a ghost, and the dark shadows under her eyes were more prominent than ever. He touched her cheek, finding it sunken, and on her cheekbone was a light green bruise from her fall, but she was breathing. Part of the heavy feeling that had settled in him since he discovered the potion type lifted as he found her still of this world.

"Cassi," he whispered to her. "Cassi, wake up." He shook her very gently, and her eyelids fluttered.

"Nyeht," she whispered. "Pazhalsta, nyeht."

"Cassi, you're going to have to speak English before I understand what you're saying," he said quietly to her, trying not to startle her. She opened her eyes a bit more, then a sort of wild panic beheld them.

"Snape? Oh God, no…" she moaned, and she tried to roll out of his arms, but he held her tighter. "I'm fine! I'm fine! Let me go! I'm fine!" She fought him with all her remaining strength, trying to push away from him.

"Oh no you don't," he said, and she continued to struggle with him, then gave up resignedly, very tired from her efforts. She wouldn't have gotten far anyway, she was too weak to move.

"What are you doing here?" she asked haughtily, squinting up at him, still trying to wake up properly, and he thought she even sounded weak, her voice was barely above a whisper.

"I came here to talk to you, and you happened to be laying on the floor, not conscious," he said, the concern in his voice hard to hide.

"Imagine that. Well, I'm fine now, so let me go," she said, trying to sound like her usual cynical self, but that tired her too, and she blacked out again in his arms. When she came to, she was still lying on her floor, but she had a pillow under her head and a cool cloth on her forehead. She tried to sit up, but fell back against the pillow, muscles aching and mind reeling.

"Don't even think about it," called a deep voice from a chair next to her.

"Snape?" she asked again.

"Sorry to disappoint you," he said dryly.

"What's going on?" she demanded, finding her voice. She felt quite a bit better than she did earlier, but still dreadfully dizzy.

"I think you know what happened Cassi," he said quite plainly. The horrible feeling of discovery welled up inside her, and she turned her head away from Snape. Silence fell thick upon them.

"I didn't have a choice, you have to understand that," she whispered, not out of weakness, but out of shame.

"I do," he said quietly, and she shifted so that she lay on her side, facing him. He watched her, but not in that menacing way he usually did, it was blatant protective watching, as if he had been assigned to do so.

"I mean, it started out with just the Anxiety Potion, taken probably once every other week, in moderation when I couldn't take the stress calmly anymore. But I couldn't sleep, so I took a Sleeping Potion, knowing what could happen. Then it got worse, and before I knew it, I needed my Anxiety Potion more than I needed air." Cassi wouldn't look at Snape anymore she was so ashamed of herself, but he already knew her darkest secret so telling him this couldn't hurt, and she felt if she had to tell someone, it would be best if it was him. He didn't seem appalled by any of this, which was a slight comfort to her.

"You know it stopped working for the better awhile ago, don't you?" he asked, small increments of tenderness being added to his voice. She nodded. Severus started again. "I really should have caught onto it, or you should have told someone. You showed every sign of it; socialization problems, the total control you commanded over yourself, fatigue, it all fits."

She sighed. "I wasn't about to tell anyone, I hate getting help from others. I've always cared for myself." Severus silently agreed with her, he remembered when he was taken to the nurse when he was a young man, arguing and being physically dragged along the entire way. 

"Well, you're going to have to get help now, I've drained all your potions," he said in a firm voice, and she closed her eyes and sunk into her pillow.

"You didn't," she moaned in disbelief.

"I did," he said serenely. "And I'm taking you to Madam Pomfrey as soon as you can walk."

"NO! I won't go, you can't take me to the nurse, they'll never let me teach again, I'll be confined to a bed forever. Please, please don't take me," she pleaded, her eyes begging him.

"Calm yourself, calm. I won't have you blacking out again because you're excitable," he said soothingly, and she closed her eyes for a moment and regained her composure, while Severus seemed thoughtful. "Then you must submit yourself to my care," he said with resolute. She was silent for a moment.

"Alright," she said quietly. "Fine. Just no nurse."

This startled him slightly, but he recovered quickly.

"First things first then. We'll wait here until you can walk, then we're going to my dungeons, I can't do a damn thing in this room," he said with irritation, knowing that this could take some time. He leaned back in his chair, folded his arms and watched her thoughtfully, as if lost in a memory. She sighed and tried to rest, but to no avail. Cassi was having a very hard time processing this gentleness from Snape, as the kindest he had ever been to her was that day with the spider. And then, of course, earlier that afternoon, when he was trying to assist her in correctly stirring the potion, but had only succeeded in making her heart pound hard and her hands tremor. He was never kind or sympathetic, yet he seemed to display both traits tonight, however small. She found this greatly confusing, so she shut her eyes and tried not to think about it.

"You might as well just help me up now, I won't get much stronger than this," she said after awhile, and he stood and offered his hand to her and helped her stand. She leaned against his arm at first, after closing her eyes to shut out the dizziness, but then managed to walk on her own after a bit. She followed him to his dungeons, very glad that the school was dark.

When they finally descended the stairs, Severus instructed her to sit in the chair by his desk while he went to go get something. She did so quietly, putting her face in her hands, torn between hoping this was an awful dream and gratefulness to Severus for not taking her to the nurse.

"Take this," he said, emerging from his office with a small phial of white liquid. Cassi looked up, and he placed the bottle in her hands. She rolled the cool glass in her palm as she examined it.

"What is it?" she asked.

"Antidote for the potion you have in your body at this time, it ought to neutralize it," he replied simply, and he watched her expectantly.

"Ought? Umm, are you sure?" she asked nervously.

Snape rolled his eyes, becoming impatient. "Yes, I'm sure. If you're going to refer to me as 'oh great Potion's Master' when attempting to insult me, you could at least be confident in my abilities. Now take the potion."

"Fine, fine, touchy," she said, and she took the small amount of potion in the phial and gave it back. He pocketed the bottle and silence befell them.

"Why are you doing this for me?" she asked very quietly. _He should have just let me die._

Severus sat down at the chair at his desk next to her and drummed his fingers on the old book, still opened to the page about Anxiety Potions. "Aside from the nurse and Dumbledore, I'm probably the only one who could help you. And… I haven't exactly _helped_ your situation this year, so this is partly my fault. Therefore, I'm correcting it."

Cassi felt very bad for him as she watched him now flip through the book, obviously looking for something, even if it was a distraction he was searching for. He was right, he had made things worse for her, but she still felt sorry she had let it get to her. She hated other people to feel bad about her or for her, part of the reason she didn't want others helping her. Before being able to give it a second thought, she reached out and touched his arm lightly. He turned his head and looked at her curiously, coal-black eyes wide.

"I didn't help my situation either, and I don't want you to regret your actions. And I don't want you to act differently because you think I'm weak and sickly. I hate that, and it would be too hard for you so don't even try it," she said, and she smiled when she said the last part. She thought she caught a half smile on his mouth, but it vanished too quickly for her to tell the difference between a smile and a smirk. She removed her hand from his arm, surprised that she had done that, and he continued to flip through the book. 

He finally stopped at a page, and marked it with a quill, then shut the book. "I've got a potion in mind that will be useful for you, but it will take a few days to brew, which means," he said, sounding sterner, "you're not to take anything for 3 days."

She ran her fingers through her hair, then nodded bleakly. "That's not going to be easy."

"I know it's not, but it's absolutely necessary," he said, still sounding quite rigid and stern. "You should probably go and try to sleep. Are you sure you can make it to your room without collapsing?"

"Yes, I feel better now." Cassi stood and walked over to his heavy wooden door, but turned before leaving. "Thank you," she said softly. Snape's only reply was a nod, but that was enough for her and she left his dungeon.

As soon as the door shut with a click, he set his head on the desk in relief, his hair falling around him, shutting out the rest of the room. He reprimanded himself for being so gentle with her, he was kind and gentle maybe once every few years, and he hoped that she didn't run away with the wrong idea about him. And yet, he didn't think she was a gentle person either, but was proved wrong when she touched his arm delicately, sending electric bolts through him, leaving him feeling strangely empty as she left.

~

The next day was a Saturday, but Severus still awoke early. He got ready and left his dungeon, deciding that he would start her potion when he got back. But first, he wanted to make sure she had made it to breakfast. He knew all too well that she would lose her appetite, as well as her ability to sleep while she took nothing.

He entered the Hall and was relieved to see her sitting at the table, though her head was in her hands.

"Well, I see we're at least up," he said as he sat down. Slowly, she looked up and glared at him.

"I hate you," she groaned. "I have a headache, I'm tired, and I'm in no mood to bat sarcastic comments around, so it would be greatly appreciated if you please kept your mouth shut."

"Eat something," he said quietly.

"No." She was being defiant on purpose.

"Look, here comes Madam Pomfrey," said Snape, speaking loud enough to catch her attention.

"Fine! I'm eating something. You like commanding me around, don't you?" she said darkly. He smirked. His smirk was wiped off, however, immediately with the entry of Simon.

"Oh look, here comes you friend," he sneered.

"What's that supposed to mean?" she snapped with a glare. The conversation was cut short as Simon sat down.

"Cassi!" he exclaimed. "Wha-what happened?" He stared hard at her cheek, which had a purple bruise on it from her faint.

"I fell," she said shortly, clearly telling him that it was an off limits topic.

"That was some fall," he said quietly, then ate in silence. Cassi ate what she could, then returned to her room to read. Severus walked down to his dungeons, thoughtful.

Meanwhile, rumors spread like wildfire. All the students had seen the bruise on Cassi's cheek, and obviously there had to be a good reason for it. Some said that one of her suits of armor attacked her last night, but others had more sinister things in mind. Most were under the impression that she and Snape had gotten into a fistfight the way they were bickering that morning. Some argued the point that Snape wasn't hurt in the slightest though, and if they truly had fought, Snape would come away with nothing less painful than a broken nose and a few cracked ribs. Whichever it was, they were under the impression that one day, both would lose their temper and tear each other apart. They eagerly waited for the day Snape would get his.

Two days passed, and in Cassi's opinion, they were the longest days of her life. She was exhausted, and overall, very moody and paranoid. She jumped at the slightest noise, and had trouble conducting her class that Monday. It ended up that her students had to read a chapter from the book and write essays in silence while Cassi worked at her desk, struggling to stay awake. Luckily, her next class period was a free one, in which she decided to try and sleep, something that had evaded her since Friday night. Her students obeyed her wishes, though glanced at her curiously from over the top of their books, wondering what was going on.

When the bell rang for dismissal, Cassi nearly cried out in joy. As soon as she set head on the desk to sleep, a voice rung out from her doorway.

"Sleeping on the job?" it called.

"Shove off Snape, or you'll find yourself without a tongue," she called back muffled, then lifting her head to look at him through stray strands of black hair.

"Nice to see you too," he said sarcastically, then shut the door, drowning out the rumble of students in the hallway. He then strode over to her desk and set a small flask of black potion in front of her.

"Take a small bit of that once a day for a week," he instructed. She stared up at him.

"And then?" 

"And then you won't have to take anymore potions for anxiety ever," he stated shortly.

"Sounds like poison," she said dryly, but took some all the same.

"You have to learn to be more trusting," he said, his eyes turning cold.

"Pardon? Trusting? People who live in glass houses, Snape…" she said, trailing off. 

"I only trust those who deserve it," he growled. "Now, you need to eat something at lunch, or you'll make yourself sick. And try to get some sleep tonight, you look like Death itself."

"Thank you for that assessment, Professor," she mumbled darkly. "It's almost as if you cared."

Something about that sentence made him lash out. "Is it _so_ far beyond you to think that I might _care_? Or that I _know_ what you're going through?" he questioned, black eyes full of sincerity. He straightened up suddenly and turned to leave, but in a flash Cassi was in front of him, blocking the door. Snape hadn't thought it possible for someone of her state to move so quickly, but there she was, standing in front of his path with strangely gentle eyes. Damn him and his inability to control his words around her.

"Explain," she said, voice not entirely barren of compassion.

"I don't have to," he sneered, trying to protect himself from his own past. He started again, trying to push her away so he could get to the doorknob, but she wouldn't move.

"No, but I would appreciate it if you did," she said, her expression softening into a very earnest and placid look.

Snape was silent for some time, practically glaring at her for daring to be so inquisitive. "Fine. I was young, and afflicted with the same thing you have, every sort of anxiety disorder in the book, until someone else helped me." He stared into her eyes, and saw his own black reflection in their cool depths, marring the beauty of their color like a dirty smudge. He hated every emotion that swirled in those eyes; the miserable pain, the hidden torture, the wracking guilt, all shone out at him like a mirror of his own eyes. He wanted those eyes to shut, he wanted to _make_ them shut.

"Who?" she breathed, boring holes into him with one steadfast expression of understanding of his situation. He hated that look too.

"Dumbledore," he stated shortly, and an intense look was shared. "Now, Cassandra, you seem to have a habit of blocking my path to doorways. I would appreciate it if you ceased to do so, so move." She stepped aside, still watching him with those horribly pained eyes. He disappeared out the door as soon as she stepped away, and she was now left with watching her very blank door with an even blanker expression.

"That's not the part I wanted explained though," she whispered to the door, her silent witness being stoically quiet. _I wanted to know if he really did care. _

Cassi took her potion as directed, once a day for a week. The taste was an awful flavor, far beyond that of her other potions, but she managed to choke it down every day. The first thing she had done was to take the empty bottles from her other potion and hide them under her bed, because they were first of all in the way, but mostly because she didn't want them sitting there, reminders of her past pains and addictions.

Snape had noticed a strange, yet subtle, difference in her. She was still as sarcastic as ever, probably even more so, but it was accompanied with a wry smile instead of a dark glare. Being social still evaded her, but she seemed a little more content. That 'look' in her eye, as Snape had named it with a shudder, was becoming less dominant, and a more passive one took its place.

These changes were somewhat relaxing to Snape, because it did so without changing the things he loved about her (as much as he hated to admit any sort of affection for the creature). Unfortunately, none of them had changed her actions towards him, with the exception of how nervous she was around him occasionally. He suspected it had something to do with something he's done, but it was useless to think about what it was, as she was such an enigma to him at times. Of course, they still threw cutting remarks at each other, but it was more of a game now, to see who could have the last word, a battle of the wits. No one seemed to have noticed that anything had happened to her, or that Snape had had anything to do with her other than claw arguments out of her.

One afternoon during break, as Cassi was just becoming used to not taking any potion at all, Snape decided to pay her a visit, but for business reasons only (or so he told himself). Her door was open, and he was about to step in when he heard a melodious song ringing quietly about the room. He peered in to see Cassi rearranging her books on her bookcase in the back of the room, her back turned to Snape. He smirked and leaned against the doorframe, observing her as she worked, listening to her sing softly to herself. For someone who was a sharply sarcastic mystery, he thought she sang rather sweetly. The song wasn't particularly happy, nor was it depressing; it was strangely soothing, though slightly eerie, yet he liked it all the same. Music wasn't something Snape dabbled in much, but he grew fonder of her and her musical talents as she continued to work.

"Don't shadow my door frame, Snape," she sung in the same tune, and turned around to face him, three books in hand, the song ending directly after she sung his name. "Spying on me?" Cassi tilted her head and looked at him with innocent curiosity. 

Severus shook his head slowly and walked into the room, shutting the door behind him. "No Cassi, I've got better things to do with my time than watch you reorganize your bookshelf. I've come in Dumbledore's stead."

"Oh," she said, interested. She placed the books on a space on the shelf behind her, and turned around to face him again, clasping her hands behind her and leaning back against her shelf.

"Dumbledore has asked me to invite you to join our Defense Against the Dark Arts meetings." He watched the effect of these words on her, but it was nothing more than increased interest, so he continued. "Our Defense organization was created with the purpose of obstructing Voldemort's return to power through the aid of powerful and trustworthy witches and wizards. We meet roughly once a month in the castle. As you are the Defense teacher, and you did manage to pull off a fairly good performance with that spider, our members have decided to put our faith in you and we ask you to join us in a meeting this evening," Severus stated this plainly enough, though conviction flared in his black eyes. 

"I accept," she said resolutely, then decided she might as well ask her questions while Snape's patience seemed to be flexible. "So, what exactly do you do in these meetings?"

"We map out attack sites, hear the reports from our spies, and plot against Voldemort's next move. There hasn't been much to do lately, as you have hopefully noticed, there seems to be a gap in his climb to power," said Snape.

"How many members are there? Is most of the staff in it?"

Snape looked thoughtful a moment, then said blankly, "There are about fifteen members, but not everyone is able to come to the meetings every time. Five of them are spies, and they rotate turns to attend and represent the other spies. Two work inside the Ministry, and are sometimes called away. McGonagall, Flitwick, Hagrid, you and myself are the only teachers in this, and the other's are a shopkeeper and a friend of Dumbledore's, and then of course Dumbledore himself."

Cassi nodded along, then turned her eyes to the floor. "So Simon is not part of this?"

"No, he has not shown that he could contribute much to our cause," stated Severus, beating his jealousy down within himself, try as hard as he could to keep it out of his voice and eyes. What was it about that man's very _name_ that made him see red?

"I see," she said, nodding again. "Anything else I should know?"

"Not really, other than that this is a very secret society, and if word ever got out that we held these meetings, we'd all probably be dead, so it's best to keep this to yourself," he said with a slight growl.

"Do _you _trust me enough to be in this?" she asked, eyes shining cunningly.

Ugh, damn, now he had to answer the question one way or the other. "I believe it's worth a chance, if not, a simple Memory Charm ought to be enough. It's just one more thing for you to forget." He smirked at her, and she scowled.

"Not funny," she said. He crossed his arms and continued to smirk at her, then a thought seemed to have struck him and he too scowled.

"There is one thing I forgot to mention," he started slowly. "Have you been following the papers the last few years?"

"Yes," she said curiously.

"Well, as you may recall, a ah…person by the name of Sirius Black escaped Azkaban a few years back. He's also a member of this," said Snape, clearly angered by the mere mention of this man, and Cassi was torn between horror and the sudden urge to meet the man that made Snape so angry so quickly (a gift, to be sure).

"What? How did… how did that happen?" she whispered.

"Dumbledore's under the impression that he was wrongly convicted and imprisoned. So he's been part of this since last year, but he rotates with the other spies," said Snape darkly.

"And what do you think?"

"Let's keep my opinion out of this," he said, stiffening. She realized that his opinion must conflict with Dumbledore's, but if Dumbledore had enough faith to allow her in, then there must be some truth in Dumbledore's reasoning to pick Black. _I really must meet him, it ought to be very interesting indeed._

"And he will be there?" she asked.

"Unfor-, err, yes," he said, balling hands into fists.

"Then I shall be glad to meet him," she said with a grin, only making Snape's stomach drop a few notches and his eyes to go wide with amazement.

"Wha- what?" he asked. "I hadn't thought you to be so…"

"Trusting?" she asked. "I've taken _your _advice after all, and he seems very interesting. Alright now, what time is this meeting and where?"

"Eleven o'clock, Dumbledore's office. Oh, and the password's been changed to 'Pepper Imps'," he said shortly, and turned around and left the room abruptly without so much as a goodbye glance.

"I wonder what that was about," she said to herself as she straightened up her books and got ready for class.

Late that night, Cassi walked to the second floor in the dark of the night, nervous about who might be at the meeting when she arrived. She decided to just forget it and go ahead, but she found herself at the gargoyle all too soon. She whispered the password to it, and stepped inside the door and up the familiar flight of three steps.

With a shaking hand, she opened the door and peered inside. No one was in there, not even Dumbledore, but she was rather early.

Just then, she heard a rustle of cloth from near a bookcase and she looked in that direction, wand already in hand. There stood a dark, long-haired man, with dark brooding eyes and sunken cheeks. It was Sirius Black, to be sure, so Cassi put her wand back in her sash. She thought he looked different somehow, and tried to recall the pictures she had seen of him. He did look different, his hair was shoulder-length instead of elbow, his eyes look brighter, and he didn't look nearly so menacing when he was smiling as he was at her.

"H-hello," she managed to say, and she extended her hand to him. He looked surprised, blinking at her a few times, then taking her hand and shaking it gently.

"You're not afraid?" he asked. She shook her head, and he flashed his smile again. "Well, then, I'm Sirius Black, and are you Cassandra Talin?"

"Cassi," she said.

"Well, Cassi, would you like to sit next to me?" he asked, brightening even more and gesturing to some chairs around a table Cassi just noticed, and she dared to think that he was kind of handsome when he was energetic. She smiled and sunk into a chair next to him.

"If you don't mind me asking, vi guhvahretie pah-russki?

"Da," she replied with a smile, then decided to see the depths on his ability to speak her language_. "You are not a native, when did you learn to speak the language?" _He raised his eyebrows at her question in Russian.

"I taught it to myself in school. For…entertainment purposes. It annoys certain persons to death when you insult them in a language that they can't speak," he said with a smile. She grinned.

__

"You are gifted then, most people lose their language after so many years, or at least their accent, but yours is wonderful," she said, blushing slightly.

__

"I'm flattered," he started, but stopped and tensed as someone walked in the door. She turned around to see Snape standing there, somewhere between shock, hatred, and mortification.

"Snape!" she said, her voice rather high and her accent still very evident, as it's hard to transition accents so quickly.

"Cassi," he said as a greeting, but it almost sounded like a threat.

__

"Watch this," whispered Sirius in Russian to her. He then directed his eyes to Severus and said plainly, "_Professor Snape is an ugly git, and that look on his face is most certainly not helping. It sets off his big nose, which is perpetually in other people's business."_

"What's he saying?" Snape asked Cassi, but she was fighting laughter too hard to answer in anything but a small gasp and a giggle. She covered her face with her hands and laughed, while Sirius grinned and shot a glance at Severus.

Something about the look on Snape's face made him pause for a moment though. He hadn't seen Snape look so…well, _jealous_ before. Hatefully jealous. It was certainly enough for him to give Snape an odd look, and Snape wiped his face blank of any such look. Then Sirius looked back at Cassi, who ran her fingers through her hair as a way of composing herself, and it clicked. Snape was being slightly territorial with her, which was odd for him, as he usually denied any accusation of intimacy with another being. Which only meant one thing, Snape was fond of her. Sirius delighted in this little fact, and he grinned evilly up at Snape, then whispered something else to Cassi, who giggled and smiled, and responded quickly, leaving Snape lost in this exclusive conversation. He grew irritated and sat down next to Cassi and folded his arms, looking away.

__

" Ooh, he looks mad, how did you do that?" she asked in awe, smiling like crazy.

__

"You have to understand, I've had years of practice. We went to school together, you see. He's the one I learned this for; it annoyed him just as much when we were in school. It's very useful," he said, and he laughed and he cocked his head and watched her. _"So, do you two get along?"_

"I'm not sure," she stated slowly. _"It's an odd thing. No, I don't think we get along well. Not really anyway, it's just…he can be very different sometimes."_

Sirius raised one eyebrow. _"Different? How so?"_

"_Sometimes it's almost like he has the capacity to be caring, I would almost go as far as to say that he's kind at times. He helped me out of a tough spot a few weeks ago, but now he's back to the way he was. It's maddening," _she finished. Sirius nodded in agreement.

"Are you two done?" asked Snape, oblivious to their conversation.

"Maybe," said Sirius, and he grinned and winked at Cassi, something that did not escape Severus. 

__

"How could you tell I'm Russian? I do not have the Russian face set. I suppose it was the accent," she said curiously. Sirius leaned closer too her making the conversation look a lot more intimate than it was. Severus supressed every urge to smack Black senseless.

__

"Ah, the only Russian witch I ever knew had purple eyes," he said silkily. _"But you meet many different cultures in bars."_ They both burst out laughing, then quieted down, letting Severus fume.

"You could at least speak something acceptable, like German," he muttered, mostly to himself.

"Nein," said Cassi and Sirius together, and they both laughed. Luckily, Dumbledore came in at that moment.

"Sorry to keep you waiting, though you are quite early. I had to escort the others who Apparated outside the grounds. Ah, Sirius, I see you made it here safely, good good. Cassandra, my dear, I'm glad to see you here, we are in need of your knowledge," said Dumbledore, eyes alight with a fire rarely seen. The others who had followed him in took their place at the table, and within a minute, all the other people had arrived.

Dumbledore began their meeting abruptly and quickly, as if he was expecting people to burst through the door at any given moment. He rolled out a map on the table, and with the others' help, began placing little numbered dots all over the map, white for Muggle attacks, red for wizard attacks. Unfortunately, no pattern could be made yet, as there were only a few dots there. Next, the spies reported what they could, though there truly wasn't anything to report. Same with the giants, who were ready for attack through Hagrid's negotiations. The silence in the Dark side's movements was unnerving. Cassi rocked back and forth slightly while two members argued about why there was a sudden gap. Sirius noticed her movements and cleared his throat.

"I think the lovely Professor Talin has something to add," he said in mock formality, and the table fell silent. _Lovely?_ thought Snape.

Dumbledore started. "Dear me, I nearly forgot you dear, you're so quiet! This is Professor Cassandra Talin, she teaches our Defense Against the Dark Arts class here. Go ahead, Ms. Talin."

"Thank you Dumbledore. Alright, this gap has happened before," she started nervously, glancing quickly between members. "If anyone remembers, there was a gap in his movements in his first ascension to power, though people didn't realize the amount of destructive power he possessed at the time. It's assumed that the first time he rose, he was in a type of gathering stage, collecting forces, assembling them, basically placing his noose around our necks. I would be very much mistaken if he was doing that again."

To her complete surprise, Severus jumped in with a comment. "She's quite right, Voldemort was placing people in stations, he had no time to make waves at first. He worked out his master plan and all it's kinks before ever enacting it." Cassi turned sharply to him, having never heard him speak of being a Death Eater before. Sure he had mentioned it that night so long ago, but the matter had been dropped quickly.

Severus chanced a glance at her, and saw her looking at him with surprise…and those horrible painful eyes. He turned away from her instantly; the look in her eyes was enough to make his heart ache with guilt and regret. He quickly involved himself in the conversation at hand, and tried not to look at her too much, though he caught himself glancing at her out of the corner of his eye.

Sirius caught that look too. This was most extraordinary to him, and he really could not pass up an opportunity like this to get back at Snape. He wondered if the poor girl knew what was going on in his enemy's mind; more than likely not, as very few did, but it was his business to know. A grin spread across Sirius' face as he realized it was obviously his duty to put the poor soul on her guard.

As the meeting came to a close, Snape turned his attention to the group of people on the other side of the table, and Sirius took the opportunity to talk to Cassi in Russian.

"_Cassi, you seem like a really great person, so there's something you should probably know. It's the secret of my success with Snape tonight_," said Sirius in a whisper, even if they were the only ones that understood what they were saying. Cassi merely blinked alertly in response. "_Err, allow me to demonstrate something_." As he said these words in a conversational way, he ran his fingertips lightly over the top of her hand, which was resting on top of the table. Cassi's eyes grew wide, but Sirius gestured at Severus, who was closing his eyes, his jaw tense. Cassi quickly averted her eyes.

"_So…what are you saying?"_ she said, something between fear and shock in her voice.

__

"Have you ever thought that perhaps Snape is uncharacteristically nice at times because he might…be fond of you?" he asked. 

Cassi was at a loss for words, but finally managed to scrape together a few sentences. _"That's crazy talk, it's Snape. We fight all the time! We argue more than anyone I know! That can't be true,"_ she said, her tone fluctuating between certainty and uneasiness.

__

"No, I'm pretty sure about this. Do you want more proof?" Sirius was trying to be gentle with this, but he felt pity for her all the same. Cassi looked like she was teetering on edge of opinions, but then nodded at his request. Sirius stood as everyone else at the table did, and then he took Cassi's hand and kissed it gently. By the time Cassi glanced over at Snape, he was edging towards the door angrily. She turned back to Sirius, who smiled in a very I-told-you-so kind of way.

"Before I forget, faculty, I have an announcement!" Dumbledore said before anyone could leave. The teachers' ears perked up and they turned to face the now standing headmaster. "On the 21st, Hogwarts will be observing the winter solstice with a dance. Goodness knows these children need a break from worrying about the Dark side. I'll announce this tomorrow morning, but I wanted to tell my core teachers first. Alright, that is all, thank you for coming."

"Oh great, the last thing I need," she said, rubbing her temple. She was getting a headache very quickly, and she resisted the feeling inside her that was welling up; the need to take a potion. She closed her eyes hard, then reopened them.

Sirius patted her shoulder kindly. "I feel quite sorry for you. Right now, being an escaped criminal looks really nice compared to your position." Cassi laughed at this, then shook his hand in goodbye and left the room, one of the last ones out.

She stepped through the hole in the wall and walked down the black halls, the night stifling her like a heavy blanket. She had just reached her floor when her headache increased sharply and she dropped to her knees.

__

His hands were so cold and so pale that she gasped when their icy grip curled around her arms tightly. He laughed at her fright.

Cassi looked up, her headache completely vanished. Her heart beat hard and she tried to calm her shaking nerves. What the hell was that? That wasn't…a memory, was it? It made a cold feeling swoop through her body.

"Nonono," she moaned softly, trying to suppress it into the back of her mind, but she could practically feel those hands gripping her arms. Snape never said she would start remembering things. She would have gladly stayed lifeless on that floor if she had known that she would regain anything from her past.

She stood and straightened her robes, thinking with her head bowed as she walked to her room. Her final conclusion was that she wouldn't trouble anyone with her recollections, and maybe they would eventually go away, though she knew deep down that this wasn't the case.

*~*~*

Cassi brushed her hair thoughtfully. Tonight was that horrid dance and Cassi wasn't looking forward to it in the slightest. Sure, it was a good idea, the children needed a bit of relief, but why a dance? Why couldn't it be a half-day or something similar? She shook her head and continued to brush her hair, then braided it halfway down her back, tying a ribbon at the base of the braid and letting the rest of her hair from the bottom of the braid hang to her waist.

She stepped over to her mirror and examined her reflection. For once in her life, she wasn't ashamed to look herself in the face. The shadows under her eyes had faded, and she no longer looked like a starved animal. She smiled at her reflection but then paced around her room nervously. This was really the last thing she wanted to do. Only one person really came to mind when she thought about this event, and that was Snape.

She had decided to disregard what Sirius had said about him, because she really couldn't find any truth in it. Just that next morning they were back to arguing about how she was eating, which she countered with a lengthy discussion about how wonderful Potter was on the Quidditch field, and how she marveled at how he had time to practice and complete all his homework. This had really set them off, and they exchanged sharp words all day. Things continued as they always had. Besides, she had other important things to think about. Like that awful memory, which she promptly pushed into the corners of her brain. Luckily, no more had resurfaced, so Cassi had just wondered if it was a fluke of her mind.

Cassi walked around her room one last time, then left her room and classroom, and started on the familiar path toward the Great Hall. When she got there, she could hardly believe the transformation of the Hall. Normally glowing yellow from the candles, it was now an eerie blue, as the flames of the candles were a bright blue. Icicles hung from the gargoyles on the walls and the tables that were pushed against them. Above the sapphire-lit dance floor, the ceiling of the Great Hall showed the night sky, glittering with pinpoints of stars and not a cloud in the sky. The moon hung over the room, casting its white light into the sea of blue. The Staff table stood where it always did, and about half the teachers were already seated. The table was laced with a silver garland, and to the left of it a band was setting up. 

Snape had watched a dark figure peer in from the enormous double doors at the entrance of the Hall, but his jaw dropped when he saw that it was Cassi. She had her hair done a little differently, and he had most certainly never seen those robes before. It didn't hang on her like her other robes, it actually fit her (_and **very** nicely too_, Snape thought) though it was black. Other than this though, she looked like a far cry from the girl he found sprawled out on the ground over a month ago.

"Severus," said a voice next to him, shaking him out of his swirl of thoughts. "You might want to stop gawking at Talin, she might notice you, heaven forbid," said Professor McGonagall sarcastically, adding the last in a mutter. Severus shut his mouth, shot a cynical look at her, and then diverted his eyes.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he mumbled, still sounding resolute. Minerva just gave him an exasperated look, rolled her eyes, and continued talking to Dumbledore while Cassi walked up to the table and sat down next to Severus. She was about to say something to him when Simon clapped his hands on her shoulders and whispered something in her ear, making her smile. Severus scowled and looked angrily at the table.

At that moment, the students began to file into the Hall, their 'oohs' and 'aahs' heard all around. As soon as everyone seemed to get situated, the band struck up a tune and a few of the kids began to dance, then more joined in, then even more, until eventually they were all dancing. The teachers watched from up at the table for the first song, but during the second they dispersed into the crowd to watch their pupils' behavior. 

Cassi watched the students fondly, smiling as she watched them have fun. She found herself in a corner of the Hall, observing everyone from here. The dance floor was a mosh of every color robe imaginable, all moving and jumping around. The music blared loudly, and the beat knocked dust off the rafters at times, but no one seemed to mind. She caught a glimpse of Simon, watching everyone gleefully, tapping his foot to the music. Then she caught Snape, and nearly laughed at the contrast as she observed his scowl from a few yards away.

Mercifully, the dance passed quickly in an array of blue light and fast moving figures. Cassi would breathe easier when this frivolous dance was over. At last, the final dance was announced by the lead singer, a long haired and scruffy looking fellow. To her horror, there was more to his announcement.

"Well young wizards and witches, the time has come when we play our last song then bid you adieu. However, for this last song, we'd like everyone to dance, so go ahead and pair up. Teachers, this includes you as well."

Desperately, Cassi tried to hide from that singer's view in the shadows of the corner while everyone around her found a partner. She caught a glimpse of Dumbledore inviting McGonagall onto the floor, and Simon being pulled along by Professor Sinistra. He caught her eye, shrugged, then winked. She hid further. 

"Let's see, is that everyone?" asked the singer, his voice magically magnified. "Nope, where's this blonde girl in the yellow's partner? Ah, here he comes. Good good. Oh, I see you two teachers in the back trying to hide. Yes, you two in the black. Go ahead now." Cassi covered her face with her hands, just in time to miss the sight of Madam Pomfrey pushing Severus over to her corner, then returning to Hagrid.

Severus, looking seriously venomous and uncomfortable, sighed and accepted his horrible fate, wishing with all his might to go back to his nice safe potions in his lovely dark dungeons. He finally extended his hand to her, and she bit her lip and took his hand. They heard a few gasps from the crowd, as if expecting a large explosion to burst through the room as their hands touched. Uneasily, he placed his hand on her back and held the other. Both felt the stares of the crowd.

"Good, that's much better. Alright, here we go," announced the lead singer, pulling the attention away from them. A few notes of music were heard from the guitarist on his right, and then the drummer on his left struck up a slow beat.

Severus really could not have been more nervous, but he kept up his cool façade as usual as they revolved slowly where they were. He took this opportunity to study her closely, something he otherwise wouldn't have a chance to do, and hadn't done since her recovery. He cast his eyes over her frivolously long black hair (though he really yearned to touch it), overly-pretty, defined face (yet he found he had no real objections to it), wonderfully shaped and full lips (he wondered how they felt beneath his own but dare not let his mind wander off), and last, her eyes. Those eyes. He did not have enough words in his being to express how much he loved those eyes, yet loathed everything they held. He hated whatever charm they had cast over him to make him feel quite this oddly. He despised their capability to hold pain equal to his own, something he would have thought impossible And yet, they were beautiful.

Beautiful. That word he had so long avoided using when referring to the opposite sex. Only a few months ago he had tried to congratulate himself for smiting that word's meaning by defying society and looking down upon it. Yet here he was, dancing with the very definition of beautiful. Holding her. He once again felt a wave of nervousness. What was he doing with a thing like her? His very touch could blacken her life, smother the fine creature. He would never forgive himself if he caused harm to her. Cassi looked up into his eyes placidly, obviously thinking about something. The words of the song passed over him.

…

__

The path that lay ahead looked black,

Darker than that which I've already walked,

Dismally I slipped off the side, 

Unable to go on,

Yet there you were to pull me up,

I told you that you saved me from myself,

And you echoed my words…

After a few more lines, the song faded into a soft silence. With as much courage and self-command as he could muster, Severus leaned over and whispered to Cassi, "See? I'm not as evil as you think." He then realized exactly how this looked and let her go, dropping his arms to his side. She opened her mouth to say something, then thought better of it and shook her head, thanking him for the dance then rushing off. The crowd broke into applause as the band took their final bows, then the students began to file out of the Hall. He ran his fingers through his hair and began herding children to their Common rooms. He caught one last fleeting glimpse of her as she intervened before a fight broke out between two Ravenclaw girls. _There she goes._

~

Cassi was up late that night, sitting on the edge of her bed, pondering hard. _That's it, I officially declare him the most fickle and moody man on the face of the planet. One second he's as angry as he can get, the next he barely notices you exist, then before you know it, he's whispering soft words into your ear with his hot breath making you tingly. Dah! What am I saying? _Never had she been this stirred up about someone before. She tried to push him out of her mind, but random things like the way he held her and his whispers got in her way.

__

If I didn't know any better, I'd say it was **you **that are fond of **him**, not the other way around, said that annoying voice in her head.

"Oh please," she said out loud, then she crawled under the covers.

The whole next week was a holiday week, and many of the students had caught the Hogwarts Express back to their homes. Cassi, needless to say, was happy to have a bit of a break from her students, and enjoyed the quiet of the castle with the majority of its pupils gone. Unfortunately, however, it made it quite hard for her to hide from certain persons.

On the following Monday morning, Cassi woke up with a headache, and also a very foul mood. She walked to breakfast as usual, relieved to find that Snape was leaving just as she was entering. He avoided her eyes and continued. With a roll of her eyes, she continued to the table. Very few students had risen yet, and Dumbledore was the only staff member there.

"Good morning," he said brightly. She replied as cheerily as she could, but ate in silence, only eating about half her food and poking the rest around her plate angrily, wincing at the pain in her head. She decided to quit playing with her food and go back to her room to read, but as she rose, Dumbledore caught her attention.

"Professor, would you mind informing Severus that I need to have a word with him? I would do it myself, but I need to see Minerva first," he asked courteously.

"Yes, Headmaster," she said politely smiling. She walked to the door of the Great Hall, when Simon Harper rounded the corner and caught her by the wrist.

"Hey, where are you rushing off to?" he asked, flashing a smile at her.

"I have to go see Snape," she answered, her tone sounding highly unenthusiastic.

"Wow, what a coincidence. I need to speak with him later today, could you tell him that?" She gave him a questioning glance, but nodded. He continued. "Oh good, thank you so much. Hey Cassi, I'm very sorry I didn't get a chance to dance with you on Friday."

Cassi found herself panicking a bit. She hoped her inferences were wrong. "I'm not much of a dancer, you didn't miss a thing."

"I don't know, you seemed to do fairly well with Snape," he commented lightly, and her eyes widened, then narrowed in recovery. "I know that must have been hard for you, dancing with someone as horrible as him." She breathed a slight sigh of relief and, for lack of thinking of anything better to do, nodded, still irritated at what he was insinuating at the first. He patted her on the shoulder, then sauntered off to the table. She shook her head and headed down the hallway until she came to descending stairs at the end of the corridor.

With a roll of her eyes, she gathered her robe up a bit and descended the steep stairs so she didn't trip. That was about the last thing she needed, being berated and laughed at by Snape for falling down a flight of steps. By the time she had reached the bottom, she felt a dramatic temperature change. It was freezing in these dungeons, and she wondered why she didn't notice before. _Oh yes, that's right _cried the little voice in her head with pleasure, _you were either waking up from fainting or blushing your head off. _She could have strangled that little voice right about then. Damn that voice of truth.

Cassi reached his room at the end of the underground hallway, made of a plain, smooth gray stone with torches flickering every few feet. With a steady hand, she knocked then opened the door. Snape was sitting at his desk, make several marks on pieces of paper with deep concentration. He glanced up then looked back down continuing with his work.

"Well, what do you want?" he snapped. He was in no better mood than she was.

"Oh you know, the usual socialization I get from you; insults, critical remarks, things like that. Yes, I came down here on my own free will," Cassi said, placing a hand on her hip, her tone dripping with sarcasm. He gave a short, impatient sigh, but still wasn't giving her the minimum respect of looking at her while she was talking. She walked over to his desk in the corner and stood beside it, looking at the marks he was placing on the student's paper. She suppressed the urge to criticize his hasty marks when she saw that the marks were all over Harry's paper. "Actually, Dumbledore wanted to see you."

Severus gave a nod of understanding. "Fine, you can go now."

"Don't treat me like I'm owl post, I'm not done," she snapped, temper rising.

"Spit it out then."

"Simon would also like to see you." After she said this, Severus laid down his quill and looked up at her, smirking.

"Really? What an interesting turn of events. Did he say anything more?" he asked.

"No, he didn't. That's probably why he wants you to go talk to _him_, so that he doesn't defeat the purpose of your visit and waste your ever so precious time." She folded her arms haughtily and glared at him, and he stood, towering over her slightly.

"Don't look at me like that, you look half starved when you do that with your face. Wait, I forget myself, you _are_ half starved," he sneered. She unfolded her arms and used every ounce of self-composure so that she didn't slap him. Her eyes flashed.

"I am not half starved," she said slowly with emphasis on every word. 

"No, you're just a girl with convenient amnesia." 

Before she could stop herself, she grabbed him by the collar and pushed him back a foot into the wall hard, pinning his wand hand back, robe collar still in hand. "You listen to me. It is not my fault that I can't remember my youth. If I had it my way, I would have never forgotten. You do not know what a living hell it is not knowing who you are. But I'm finally somewhere where I can work and I'm trusted. Even by Dumbledore. If my story is good enough for him, why isn't it for you?"

In a flash, he had used her own grip on him against her, twirling her around and slamming her into the wall. She struggled with him, then gave up, leaning close to him and giving him a cold glare.

"Ah, but what good is it to be trusted by Dumbledore but feared by the entire student body?" he asked silkily.

"You're one to talk! Everyone hates you. They fear you and your prejudiced power that you hold over their head every moment of their day. There's a difference between respect and fear, Snape," she hissed, shooting death looks into the pair of eyes that weren't an inch from hers.

"Stop calling me Snape! For God's sake, I have a name! We have known each other for four damn months, you could at least call me by my name, Severus!" he sneered back, voice dropped to a deadly whisper but it felt as if he was shouting. And those horribly beautiful eyes were flashing with fury and pain. He wanted to _make_ them _shut._

"And my name is Cassi, but it doesn't matter what the hell my name is because you still treat me like dirt!" She had sunk down to his type of whisper. Silence rang loudly in their ears as they glared at the other. A clock ticked methodically somewhere off in the distance.

Before either had the ability to comprehend their actions, they found their lips pressed against the other's. She had let go of his wrist and had placed her hand on his chest, grabbing a fistful of robes and pulling him closer. His hands were preoccupied too, one placed on her back, the other had woven its fingers through her hair possessively. Everything they had held back these past months rest on their kiss, and it showed as it grew more passionate with every passing moment. Severus pushed her back against the wall, which only deepened the kiss as she parted her lips to gasp, allowing him in. Cassi thought her heart would leap out of her chest it was pounding so hard, or perhaps die of electrocution as bolts of lightening flashed through her body, leaving her mind paralyzed. As much as he thought he should, Severus couldn't let go of her. He was a dehydrated man in an oasis of water; she was his water, everything he needed, and he was love starved for this. 

Cassi pulled back, gasping for breath and staring at him with wide eyes full of fear as she realized exactly what had just taken place, how much she had just let herself lose control. And it scared her.

"I…have to go," she whispered fast, letting go of him and escaping his grasp. She flung the door open and ran out of the room, fighting back tears. Severus had turned to watch her go.

He finally leaned with his back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling, breathing hard and feeling defeated.


	6. Too Unreal Reality

****

Author's Note: Ah, finally. I finished this chapter! It took awhile, I struggled with my characters. They're so stubborn, but you already knew that ;) Right. Ok, first off, I don't own anyone here except Simon Harper, Cassandra Talin, and Her. The others are JK Rowling's inventions and belong to her, I'm just playing with them. I'm not making any money off of this either.

*Considers* I'm thinking about bumping my rating up to R, but I'm really not sure. There are adult scenes in this (not bad, I assure you) and just general violence. I'm not sure, you tell me if you think it needs to be rated higher. I don't think it does, but I do want to be safe and not corrupt any of the little kiddies ;). Read and review please!! Leave your email address if you want me to email you when I update the story! Thanks!

Chapter 6: Too Unreal Reality

"…and so the powdered pixie wings will be late in getting here, Severus. …Severus? Severus?" The Headmaster peered at him curiously from across the desk, eyes searching from behind those half moon spectacles. Severus Snape shook his head and brought his focus back onto things in the room. He had been so lost in thought that he had even strayed from listening to Dumbledore. Albus was now looking at him hard, and Snape felt as if he could see right through his skull and into his thoughts that he guarded so well.

"Sorry, Dumbledore. I was a bit distracted," he said vaguely, then leaned forward as if more into the conversation. Albus smiled and leaned back in his chair.

"Anything you'd like to talk about?"

"No," Snape replied a little too quickly and a little too firmly.

"You can talk to me about anything," he said lightly.

"I know, Dumbledore, and I have before. I trust you implicitly."

"But?"

"But," echoed Snape. _How to get out of this?_ He didn't need this right now. "But… I'll work this through by myself." Dumbledore nodded, and Severus didn't doubt that he knew exactly what he was talking about, and he was immediately curious to how much he knew and how much of that he could deny. However, their conversation was over, and Severus stood to leave, nodded once to Dumbledore and swept out of the room in a hurry, off to Simon's room to get this over with.

"Ah, my dear boy. I wish you luck and goodness knows you'll need it," muttered Dumbledore to himself, then smiled amusedly and picked up his quill to work.

Cassi had run as fast as she could out of those dungeons, through the corridors, through the Great Hall and outside. As soon as she reached the icy air, she wished she had her cloak, but wouldn't go back there if she was paid to do so. She ran to her rock she had spent so much time at this year and collapsed next to it, fighting back tears desperately. Shaking and blinking back the prickles in the corners of her eyes, she silently let go of her last fiber of self-control and let everything that had built up this past month press on her mind. Had her feelings really gotten _that_ out of control? 

Yes, they had. And now she allowed her mind to think what she had held back. She had wanted that, wished for it with ever corner of her soul without her ever knowing it. Why? Why? He was such a silly greasy git that she could barely stand it, yet here she was, trying hard not to cry outside the castle in the bitter wind because things had gone from intense anger to intense love in a snap. It wasn't logical, they fought so much, it was impossible for her to even entertain the idea that she had feelings for him. So impossible, but so right. No! not right! _Please no, please_. It was at that time that she allowed herself to think that maybe she loved him. Oh God, even thinking that blistered her heart. No, not her, she was Miss Self-Control, a perfect specimen of a love vacant creature. She didn't need this, she didn't need him. She only relied on herself. _And_ _look where that got you, you nearly died from your 'self reliance', _piped up that evil little voice of truth in her mind. _He saved you. _And she was grateful, she really was, but she didn't need to go and fall all over him.

Which brought her to another point, what had possessed her to kiss him just then? An impulse? She was going to have to watch herself, never let that happen again. _Never. _No matter how much she wanted it, no matter how good it felt, no, never. On this she was set and determined.

__

No matter how good it felt. And it had felt so good, surprisingly so. She loved it, she loved him, and she wanted just one more second of that kiss to be content for the rest of her life. But there was no way that could be, it was pure absence of mind that he had reacted to her kiss, and this was the very thought that finally brought her to tears. She had never cried in her entire life, but right then it seemed to be the right thing to do, and she couldn't suppress it any longer. She broke into soft sobs into her arms, shoulders shaking hard as she thought to herself. He was, after all, Severus Snape, a man who could never love her, a cynical girl with no memory (how she hated to remind herself of that). Perhaps he had even reacted that way intentionally, just to cause more pain. _He did a damn good job of it. _She had herself convinced that his kiss meant nothing, and likewise, hers meant nothing to him .

"You are so _foolish,_ Cassandra," she said firmly to herself, then dissolved into tears into her arms again. She lay there for awhile, going over what just happened many times. It hurt unimaginably to think that she had just showed her hand of cards and there was no hope of the feeling being mutual. But she had loved it. She had loved being held tight in his arms, feeling what she nonsensically thought was passion, until her reason prevailed at the moment of breathing and she ran. What would have happened if she didn't run? He would have more than likely been angry, or would he have laughed? Both seemed possible, though painful. Heartbroken and hurt, she lay next to her rock, shivering and shaking from the biting wind, but also from her tormenting thoughts.

__

I wish I had my potion, she thought to herself. _If only he hadn't drained it all. Maybe he didn't find that one…no wait, yes he did. He did that on purpose, just to make my sickly little life hell. No, he didn't, but it sure seems like he did. Oh, who are you kidding Cassandra? Look at you, weeping on the dead grass for yourself. Pathetic. Pull yourself together! Face up to the facts, you're a bitter, foolish girl for falling in love with someone like Snape. He's just here to do his job, and you've twisted everything. Good job, I hope this hurts, that'll teach you. Besides, what could he possibly see in you?_

***

Well that was pointless, thought Severus as he walked out of Simon's room. _Never have I heard a man speak about so much nothing in my entire life. I knew he was a bumbling, intruding, useless idiot, but I think I overestimated him. Waste of air, if you ask me. What does Cassi see in him?_

And with that last thought, the horrible sickening pang of reality hit him hard. He continued to walk down to his dungeon, the very same dungeons in which the crimes of that morning had been committed. He wanted to be away from the rest of the castle before he thought about what had taken place. The dungeons were his hallowed ground, his one and only refuge from the overly happy world, the only place he could truly meditate clearly without worries. There was one room though, one wall, he would never look at the same again. That wall by his desk. That wall will be forever tainted in his memory, for good or bad he did not yet know, but something told him it wasn't for good. He walked past it, head turned so he wouldn't even look at it, threw open his office door and walked in, shutting and locking the door behind him. Then he went through the other door behind his office desk and walked to his room.

Severus felt his room reflected his personality quite accurately. It was cold and dark, with only one window, which was draped heavily with a thick black cloth. Sallow candles flickered from their sconces in the corner of his room as he walked in, casting light over the few bits of furniture. He needed only a writing table, a chair, and a bed, all placed opposite each other in the room. They were made from the same dark wood and were simple, yet not wanting in elegance. A soft scraping noise was heard when he walked across the stone floor to his bed, sitting glumly on it, preparing to actually confront the thing he had pushed away to not think about.

He saw it all play before him as if it was only a few seconds ago, not half an hour ago. The entrance, the bandying of words, the grabbing of his collar, the emotions flashing in her eyes, then his swirl, the low words, and then…and then the kiss he would have problems forgetting. He could have sworn she was just as eager as he was, the way she pressed her lips back against his, the sweet tasting gasp, the tight grip she had on his robes, but no, it was illogical. He must have wanted to believe it so bad that he had twisted the facts. That thought alone made him shiver. Never, never did he change the meaning of cold hard facts for his own personal benefit. Sure, he twisted tones, inflections, and word meanings, but never facts such as this. It was enough to show him exactly how dangerous that situation had been.

He couldn't sit still on the bed anymore, he simply couldn't. He felt the uncontrollable urge to wash these sins from his skin, so he stood up to take a shower. He happened to glance at himself in the mirror on the way there, and turned away immediately in disgust. Just one more reason to verify that he had fooled himself into thinking her emotions had been mutual was his reflection. Sallow skin, long greasy hair, a hooked nose, and plain black eyes, nothing worth noticing. Something to cringe at, but not anything to fall in love with. He sighed and walked on. Even if she had been, well, interested (he supposed this was the lightest way to put it), he didn't have much to offer her. _You're an old man, Severus. 36. You're not a reckless, love struck 21 year old anymore, you're a 36-year-old professor of Potions who is a bitter, horrible person. Granted, I won't even be half way done with life when I'm 75, but 36 is too old to be of any interest to someone like her. Well, she is only a few years younger than yourself, but even still, she's…Cassi. _

"Good reasoning," he drawled to himself sarcastically. "And anyway, you ought to have nothing to do with this ack, _love, _trash. It's a bloody waste of time." And this was what he was trying to convince himself of all the way into the shower and until he washed his hair.

"It's not a necessity to be loved. It's not like eating, or sleeping, however annoying and time-consuming those silly activities are. It's just one of those things unreasonable people do when they haven't any other purpose in life but to create more unreasonable people. And you would _think_, of all the people to know this, I would be one of them. Then what _was _it that possessed me to do such a stupid thing like kiss her?" He left his question unanswered as he scrubbed at his hair, thick white suds running down his hands and arms to his elbows. No matter how much he washed his hair, within half a day of it's cleaning, it always looked as if he hadn't washed it in days. Sometimes he just gave up entirely, letting it fall greasily straight down to just above his shoulders from tucked behind his ears. What did it matter? He wasn't out to impress anyone in the castle, and it was too much of a bother to do every day if it was just going to go back to its original state. He could have easily made a potion to fix it, or perhaps even used a spell, but calling attention to himself through his hair was really the last thing he wanted.

Severus scrubbed hard at his skin until it was raw, as if the harder he scrubbed, the more he could take back his actions, or at least make up for them. When he finally turned off the knobs and dried himself off and dressed back into his black robes, he had himself convinced of one thing, he didn't need to be in love and love ought not to seek him.

__

You think you're going to protect yourself better if you convince yourself that you don't really love her. You're just trying to guard your feelings, and it's getting you no where. Face the facts, you basically forced a kiss on her, and scared her out of her mind. Some help you are, just when she was recovering too. He gripped his comb tightly and ran it through his hair a couple times, then slammed it down and stomped away, pacing around his room, contemplating his last thought.

"Damn it, Severus, you've _got_ to stop talking to yourself!" he shouted angrily. Then he slammed out of his room, grabbing his cloak off the hook as he passed through the door, and ventured outside.

***

Meanwhile, Cassi was trying to calm herself down, but failed horribly each time she remembered what drove her outside. The wind had grown increasingly cold and gray clouds threatened to snow upon her, but she didn't care. She simply lay curled up next to her rock, sobbing into her arms.

It was quite the surprise then, when she felt a large warm hand on her back. She immediately stopped her foolish crying and looked up, seeing Hagrid crouched down next to her, looking quite concerned. She dried her eyes hastily and sat up, leaning back against the rock, arms pulling her knees to her chin.

"Was wrong, Cassi?" he asked concernedly. She merely shook her head. He patted her knee and sat down next to her, fortunately blocking the wind. They sat in silence for awhile, while Cassi composed herself and sat miserably, thinking quietly.

"Summit happen up at the castle?" he suggested, thinking that if she wasn't going to talk, he could probably guess it. It didn't take a genius to guess what she was upset about, and he knew he was on the right track when she nodded.

"Snape?" he guessed again. She paused, considering her chances, then nodded again. "Did yeh two fight again?" 

"Yes and no," she mumbled, then set her head down on her knees. A pause.

"How long 'ave you been out 'ere?" he asked as he watched her shiver slightly.

"Honestly, I haven't the slightest clue," she said, muffled through her knees.

"Then we better go inside, it's gettin' cold out 'ere, might even snow," he said, and he offered his hand to help her up, and they walked to his cottage. As soon as Cassi stepped inside, she was grateful to him as a wave of heat washed over her from the fireplace. Her cheeks stung from the sudden change in temperature, and she sat down glumly on a wooden chair at the giant table while Hagrid started some tea. Finally, he placed a rather large cup in front of her, and she murmured her thanks and sipped it.

"So yeh had a fight with Snape, eh?" he said. He _would_ get to the bottom of this, it had been going on for too long and he was only getting part of the story from both of them whenever he managed to talk to them.

"Yes."

"'Bout?"

She paused, trying to remember. "Silly stuff, just our normal picking at each other. Nothing so important." 

"Then what _was_ import'nt?" He peered at her, beetle black eyes glinting with curiosity. She wanted to tell him badly, to get it off her chest, but she couldn't make the words form, so she shook her head and sipped her tea with a blush. Hagrid could guess though, but he decided to pretend he didn't know. He had long suspected those two despite their incessant fighting, and he was about to make a very general comment when a knock sounded at the door. Cassi's eyes darted to the door, and she set down her tea quickly, twisting her fingers in nervousness.

"Err, who is it?" called Hagrid.

"Severus," came the reply, and Cassi jumped, startled. Hagrid gestured to a dark brown chair in his living area by the fire with its back to the door and Cassi ran around to it, pulling her feet up and hiding. Hagrid whispered for her to wait there, and opened the door.

"Bit cold to be walkin' around out there, don' ya think?" said Hagrid warmly, as if expecting Severus all along. Severus stayed near the door, no real intention of staying long in the cabin.

"Have you seen Professor Talin?" he asked Hagrid coldly. 

__

Professor Talin? thought Cassi. The tone broke her heart, as did the formality.

"Nope, 'aven' seen 'er," said Hagrid gruffly. Snape was quiet for awhile.

"I ah, thought she might be out here, as she seems to gravitate towards that bloody boulder outside, but apparently not," he said calmly, glancing around the cabin in one quick sweep. 

"Why ya lookin' for 'er?" asked Hagrid in a nonchalant way.

"No reason, just a trivial matter between her and I, nothing important," he said. "I best go find her elsewhere." He opened the door and stepped out.

"I'll go with yeh up to the castle," said Hagrid, putting on his moleskin coat and shutting the door behind them, leaving Cassi alone to her thoughts.

__

Trivial matter, nothing important. I tried to tell you Cassi, but you didn't want to believe it, and now you have to. What have you gotten yourself into? The only way to get through this is to act as if this never happened, and you're strong enough to pull it off. She nodded resolutely, and went to sit down at the table, patiently awaiting Hagrid's return, swirling her tea around a bit and taking another sip.

A few moments later, the door creaked open and in a white swirl Hagrid bustled in, snowflakes lingering on his shoulders and in his black beard and hair. He looked sympathetically at Cassi, whose features had hardened in determination.

"Snowin', it is. Should blow itself out by this afternoon," he said quietly, pulling his moleskin coat off of him and hanging it on a peg by the door. "Feelin' be'er?"

"Yes," she lied, tone firm. "I should probably go back to my classroom now Hagrid, pop quizzes I must grade." She paused, then added meaningfully, "Thank you Hagrid, really, thank you." Then she stood and left the room quickly, out into the biting cold, treading through the snow that was already sticking to the ground. The words 'trivial' and 'unimportant' rang deafeningly in her ears the entire way there.

It took much bravery to go to dinner that night. For one, she would see Snape and that alone took every ounce of courage she had, but also, the number of students on holiday was so huge that everyone had been reduced to one table in the Great Hall, meaning that whatever they did, everyone else saw.

However, she had put off seeing him by skipping lunch, and she was hungry. Therefore, when dinnertime came around, she put away her quizzes and locked her classroom up and went down to dinner without a second thought. She was going to prove to herself that she could handle being near him perfectly well. This did not stop her, however, from peeking in first to see who was there, then walking in normally while wishing to turn and run, as Snape was already sitting there, talking distractedly with McGonagall. She sat down quickly, staring hard at her plate. Snape didn't even glance over at her. Things went like this through the entire dinner, until Snape reached out to grab the pepper in front of him, and Cassi flinched.

__

She's scared of you. Great. Perfect. This completes my life. Wonderful. He was about to say something to her, but couldn't find the right words, so he snapped his mouth shut and kept his eyes set on something on the table. A bit of a smudge, it was, he wondered whether it would come off or not…this was ridiculous. He had been so prepared to talk to her this afternoon, what happened to that? _I'll tell you what happened, it died in the frost of her cold manner and withered away when she flinched. Good job, Severus, what a delightfully moronic way of muddling everything up. You deserve every ounce of self-imposed sarcastic congratulation. _

Not a student or teacher noticed their silent and cold manner, except one, and Hagrid just shook his wild-haired head at the complexity of the two most sarcastic people he ever knew.

~*~

If dinner was bad (which it was, it ended without a word from either of them), the rest of the week was absolutely awful, all the way to Christmas morning nearly a week later. The castle and it's few occupants where awed by the large Christmas trees displayed in the Great Hall, covered in enchanted snow that wouldn't melt and seemed to shine golden, a simple star adorning the tip of each of them. It was the first time Cassi had seen a decent Christmas tree, and she stood and watched, talking with Simon the entire time as tiny Professor Flitwick charmed the ornaments to each branch. Simon was being friendly, but a little too pushy.

"So, where's your family during the holidays?" he asked her. Cassi knew he meant well, but she didn't like all the questions. There wasn't much conversation she liked anymore, she was too preoccupied being lost in her own thoughts.

"I don't know, I don't keep up with my family," she lied readily. He blinked, making it apparent he didn't believe her. "What about your family?" she asked, intent on changing the subject.

For a second, she thought she detected panic in his manner, but on a second glance, he seemed his usual self. "Wales," he replied firmly, though his answer was short and suspicious. She tilted her head and was about to ask him about it, when he interrupted her. "They stay there all the time, my entire family does. No traveling for them, they aren't the traveling type. Haven't seen them in a very long time." She nodded and let it go. He smiled faintly, staring off into space. She wondered what he was thinking, but didn't ask.

"I'm not anything of interest," he said after awhile. "I led a boring life, just like most people did…except for you. Somehow, I don't think you led a boring life." He peered at her, blue eyes shining, almost as if he had asked a question, waiting for her to answer.

"Trust me, I would not be of interest to you," she said, biting back an ironic smile at the double meaning of her sentence. She really didn't have anything that would interest him, unless he liked stories composed of the words 'I don't know'.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that," he said, half way smiling and eyeing her. Cassi hadn't the slightest idea how to reply to an insinuation like that, nor how to react when he took up her hand in his and kissed it, then dropped it and watched Flitwick battle the last star onto the tree. "Well, that's that, the trees are put up, I'll see you at dinner tonight, Cassi." And with that, he winked and walked off, leaving Cassi standing there, wondering what had just happened. Crossing her arms, she turned on her heel and followed his path out, making sure to walk slowly so as not to catch up with him. If her deductions were correct, and she was pretty sure they were, she was in for trouble. She did not like being caught up in this…_love tangle_, as she appropriately dubbed it. She didn't think herself to be the type of person to be caught in that type of thing, that was more for those silly airhead witches you heard about from gossip in a magazine (not that she read that, it was an unavoidable topic with her coworkers in her previous job).

She pondered this as she walked down the halls, not really watching where she was going, her feet just automatically carrying her to her appropriate place, her classroom. Fortunately, she was alert enough to realize that a dark shadowy figure was walking down the hall, going the opposite way. When she absentmindedly looked up to see who it was, she bit her lip and commanded her eyes to the floor. Snape. Taking a step sideways, she was as close to the wall as she could get, head still bowed to the floor, and her pace quickening. _A few more steps and it will all be over…just a few more, please don't let him be looking at me…ok, I'm safe. This is crazy. _He had passed her, and she was turning anyway, and therefore, she was out of sight. As swiftly as she could, she returned to her classroom, locking the door behind her.

Seating herself at her desk, she looked around among her familiar scene: a neat and orderly desk, straight rows of desks, and all the books in order on the bookshelf. This was supposed to bring her comfort, it usually did, knowing everything was perfect. But everything wasn't perfect.

It was all her fault she felt this way. Completely her fault. It was entirely pathetic the way she skirted him in the halls, secretly hoping he'd bring it to her attention. Or yell at her for how quickly she ate. Or how little she ate. Or for just being there, something, _something _so that she knew he still knew she existed.

"I hate love," she growled suddenly. "I didn't ask for this, I really didn't. Me and love do not go together, I'm not meant for it, and it's not something I should be involved in." That made her feel a bit better. She was doing all she could to act like nothing had happened. _Trivial matter_. Those words rung in her ears as she shut her eyes to sleep, and were the first words she thought each morn. They haunted her.

"I'll just try harder to forget about him. Things have gone from bad to worse."

~

"Things have gone from bad to worse," Severus mumbled to himself as he remembered Cassi's blatant skirting him in the hallway, trying to pretend he wasn't there. Snape was back in his dungeon that evening, after all the present and holiday-type rituals that he hated so were over, and he was recapping that day's events. He had done a pretty good job of staying out of her way (excluding mealtimes, those were living nightmares) until today, when extra time was spent at the table as the meal was drawn out.

She had been sitting so quietly it was making him uncomfortable, until she looked over at him and said plainly "Could you pass the salt please?" He picked up the silver shaker and handed it to her, almost saying something. She had looked at him expectantly, but he couldn't form words at that moment, and she looked back down and continued eating. His hopes had dropped so suddenly after that, he should have said something, anything! He had wanted to say something, but words had failed him. Why? WHY?

"You're a fool, Severus. Just stay down here the rest of the week and you'll be safe from your own stupidity."

Severus was as bad as his word, only leaving his dungeons to eat quickly, eating at irregular hours to avoid her. This was working, and the most he had seen of her was as he was leaving the Great Hall. They, of course, said nothing to each other. Severus was actually impatient for the students to come back to fill the loud silence between Cassi and himself. It would give him something to do; he had already reorganized everything possible, not to mention that he was completely caught up on grading and had brewed three separate and very complex potions, something that went all too quickly. By the last day of break, he had absolutely nothing to do and was rereading a potions book that he already knew by heart.

Little did he know that Cassi was doing the same. She was avoiding him at all costs, and kept her door locked, hiding out in her room reading and grading. She often caught herself just staring at a page of her book, thinking about other things while her eyes just gazed blankly over the words, then she would flip back and concentrate on the book as hard as she could. Her classroom agenda had already been written for far into the future, every detail of every day spelled out in her neat, small handwriting.

Finally, the day before term would start again she decided she had had enough. 

"I refuse to lock myself in my room for one more day just because of some…._teacher _that lurks about in his dungeons anyway, might on the off chance be in the same hall as I am. I'm settling this _now_." She had finally, after two weeks, built up the courage to go up to him and face him like any normal person would. She was brave enough to do this. Plus, she couldn't go around dodging him when the students got here that day, what would they think? That she'd lost her nerve? Whatever small amount of respect she had gained from her fights with Snape would be lost all because she wasn't strong enough to retort. This had to be resolved now.

With a firm nod, she shut the book she had been looking through in a daze and left her classroom, shutting the door behind her, not even bothering to lock it. She would be back here before the students got here anyway, and besides, they didn't have any interest in her things anyway. With that, she walked downstairs, past the Great Hall and to the stairs that led to the dungeons. As soon as she reached the bottom, she remembered exactly how cold it was down here, and shivered slightly. _No, don't shiver. Shivering is a sign of weakness,_ she commanded to herself as she reached his door. For some odd reason, she couldn't make herself knock. For a few seconds, she just stood outside his door, staring at it with apprehension, studying the grain of the wood distractedly. She had to do this. Before being able to rethink her actions, she reached her hand out and knocked. A deep voice told her to enter, it's tone bored. 

He looked up for half a second to see who it was, then turned back to his book, seemingly unimpressed. This threw her off slightly, but she recovered before he noticed her confusion.

"Se- err, Snape, we need to talk," she said, her voice sounding surprisingly icy, even to her.

"About what?" His eyes didn't leave the book.

"About…well, about what happened two weeks ago." She waited with apprehension for his reply through the silence of the dungeon. That infernal clock ticked methodically off in the distance.

"Well, go on and talk," came the much-awaited reply, bored and slightly growly. "But make it quick, the student's will be here shortly."

She looked at him, dumbfounded. Of all the things she had expected him to be, bored was not one of them. It only made her attitude towards him harder, and her tone reflected that. He was just sitting there, quite still, concentrating deeply on his thick, yellowed book, in his usual dark manner. She stiffened.

"I know that," she snapped. "_They_ are the reason I'm doing this. We can not keep avoiding each other like this, they'll notice, and I'd rather them not. If it's alright with you, I'd rather not be the target of the school year's biggest rumor. Therefore, it's only sensible that we forget what happened at the start of break and continue on as normal." She stood resolutely, feet together and hands clasped behind her back, standing rigidly in front of his desk, trying not to shiver.

He looked up at her after her speech, gaze piercing through her eyes as if seeing into her mind. "If this is what you wish…" he said in a tone of acceptance, then went back to his book.

"It's only _sensible_," she repeated softly. On an impulse, she added even more softly, "I did not say it was what I wished. It is only what is _sensible_, you may do as you want to but this is what I shall do." He shut the book slowly and looked up at her.

"Yes, I suppose it is only sensible. You do as you like, and I will do as I like, Talin," he said harshly, thus ending the conversation, despite what seemed to be her confession. Nodding a little, she turned on her heels and walked slowly to the door, heartbroken but expression blank. Severus watched. He was going to let her walk out that door, and as soon as she crossed that threshold, he would have no claims on her. None. He tapped his fingers on the desk for half a second in indecision, then he leapt up and grabbed her wrist as she was half way to the door.

"Snape?" she said, looking at him coolly though her voice quavered with nervousness, then glancing down at her wrist. That was all it took.

He pulled her close to him with the grasp on her wrist and growled very softly in her ear, "For the final time, it's Severus." He leaned back slightly to look her right in the eye, but didn't really have the chance before she leaned forward and kissed him, immediately sending both their minds spinning. Like last time, it started slow and steady, almost self-consciously, before quickly evolving into a hungry passion, arms wrapping themselves tight around the other's body, so close they could feel the other's thumping heart beat through their chest. And, like last time, Cassi broke the kiss, breathing hard and looking fearful, but Severus still had a tight hold of her. She wasn't going anywhere this time, not a single chance he would go through that again.

"We can't do this!" she exclaimed suddenly, yet not letting go of him. "If anyone found out! The students, teachers, school board-"

"Dumbledore wouldn't dismiss either of us in the middle of the year when he's understaffed," interrupted Snape in a reasonable, cool tone, punctuating his argument with small kisses every few words.

"Alright, but the students-"

"It is not as if they deserve to know. Our affairs are private, and I'm just as secretive and impersonal as you are," he said quickly, entangling a hand in her hair as her kisses strayed from his lips to his neck. His breathing quickened a step, and Cassi couldn't help but smile, placing her last kiss then straightening up and facing him, lips grazing his.

"I'm not impersonal."

"Yes, you are." He nipped slightly at her bottom lip, and she couldn't help but shiver. _Sign of weakness…too true._

"No."

"Yes, and don't argue with me right now!"

"And why is that? Don't want to lose an argument when you can't concentrate?" She smirked.

"You're a bold thing, aren't you?" he snarled. She was about to reply but he silenced her with a kiss, cold lips pressed to warm. One of her arms dropped looser so it was around his waist, but the other snaked itself up to his hair, which she was gently stroking, then trailing fingers down his cheek, only to have them return to his raven black hair.

"Cassi," he hissed softly, "Cassi, you don't know what you're getting yourself into. I'm not what you want, much less what you need. And what of your other men? Sirius and Simon…"

"Other men who? Oh them. Nononono, they don't matter, just you. And it's rather my choice on what I want, isn't it? Besides, you've got it wrong if you think I don't need you. Imagine that, the Potion's _Master_ is wrong," she said, starting off in a serious, reassuring tone and ending rather slyly.

"This is not the time for mockery."

"Oh, but it _is_."

"Rather defiant, aren't we, Ms. Talin?"

"Then you're bitter."

"And you're sickly."

"Bastard!"

"Wench!"

"Kiss me!" she demanded, and he his mouth met hers roughly, crushing lips, tongues lashing out and hands seeking flesh. She had placed a hand under his collar and on his bony shoulder, now digging her nails into his skin. Meanwhile, he had slipped his hand out of her hair and was delicately undoing the last two buttons of the back of her robes, just enough to touch her back.

At the feeling of cold fingers on her back, Cassi half gasped, half moaned. Still fighting reality, she desperately tried again to express her concerns. "Severus, Severus we really, really …mmm, yes…no! I'm not done! If we ever get caught…the students… you… ohh, don't…I'll shut up now."

"Good idea," he drawled, and she melted against him, but not for long. A few voices sounded from the hallways, and footsteps accompanied them.

"Damn it," she whispered. "They're back, and I should go before we get caught."

"Fine," he said shortly, and let go of her, and she quickly redid the buttons on the back of her robes, ran her fingers through her hair, and sunk back into the sulky teacher she usually was.

"I'm glad we had this discussion," she said in a more business-like tone.

"As am I." She took a step forward and kissed him, one last time. "Hopefully, we'll chat again?" he asked in a whisper.

"Yes," she whispered back, then with her last ounce of self resolve, she turned around and walked out of the door just as Draco Malfoy walked into the room, silver blonde hair slicked back and his Malfoy smirk hanging on his lips.

"What was she doing here, sir?" he asked in a remotely interested drawl. His lip curled slightly in disgust. While most Slytherins favored her, he did not; but then again, he had always been one to do the opposite of what others were doing.

"She came to discuss something with me," he replied coldly, giving the impression that it was some petty manner that he found amusing.

"Must have been something good, she was rather red," he said, still smirking with all the cockiness of a sixteen-year-old. 

Severus picked a stray bit of dust fluff off his robes, showing no interest in the topic. "She flusters easily."

"Father showed an interest in her when I explained what her classes were like," replied the Malfoy boy.

"Oh?"

"Probably thinks you could do a better job," said Draco with a shrug. He then changed the subject, as he did not come down to the dungeons to discuss his Defense teacher and he had become bored easily. Severus listened to the child, while still wondering what the particular interest Lucius had in Talin was. He put it out of his mind, the boy was more than likely right, and Mr. Malfoy had never approved of a single teacher Dumbledore had appointed, himself being the exception.

~

That night, Cassi sat on her bed, deep in thought about one thing, Severus. It finally felt right to call him by his first name, yet she still wondered if she had done the right thing. She had never been in a relationship before, and she wondered what use she would be to him. Or what he saw in her. Or if they could be in a relationship without tearing each other apart. She remembered a moment in that dungeon when they couldn't even kiss without arguing. But it seemed alright, like if they hadn't argued it wouldn't be the same.

She laid back on her pillow and smiled, snuffing the candle with a simple spell from her wand. _Why am I smiling? Surely I can't be that happy with this, not with all the risks…_

"Yes, yes I am…" she whispered to herself.

~

__

"Severus," called a voice tauntingly. "Severus, come on!" Snape looked up to see Cassi walking towards him as he sat under the shade of a large tree in the middle of a plain grass field near a forest. She grabbed his hand, wanting him to come with her, but stubbornly he stayed at the base of the tree. She sat down next to him softly, caressing his hand with her fingertips, trying to persuade him. He nearly smiled at her attempts, but was able to keep a straight face. She finally rolled her eyes and resorted to whispering in his ear, something that always made him shiver.

"Severus, Severus please come, I don't like it out here," she said, voice soft as silk, and lips about equally so as they grazed his ear.

"Alright, fine," he finally mumbled, and she took him by the hand and led him out of the shade of the tree and into the forest. "Why are we coming this way again?" The field had vanished and turned into a dark forest.

"There's something going on," she whispered to him. There wasn't a reason she whispered, other than to not disturb the quiet of the forest, but he was suddenly glad she did so, as he could hear voices. Familiar voices. They came across a large group of people in a clearing, all standing in a circle. A figure knelt in front of another figure in the center of it, one heavily cloaked with it's head bowed, the other standing proudly in front of it.

"…charged with treason to the cause, betrayal of your fellow Death Eaters, and, most importantly, wavering loyalty to your master. Do you deny it?"

Severus was in shock, now standing behind the circle with a clear view of what was going on before him. And he knew what was happening, and why. In horror, he turned to Cassi, who was watching, transfixed in the situation.

"I deny all but the last charge!" came the voice from under the hood. A woman's voice. 

"That alone is reason enough, my dear," said the man standing over her, voice high pitched and tone a mix of anger and superiority, yet smooth. "But it pains me to kill my best Death Eater," he stretched out a spider-like hand and touched the face in the hood, "You've been so good for us… tell us one thing, this one thing, and we'll set you free." At this point he leaned down and whispered something to her, her shoulders slumping and her body trembling. He resumed his correct posture and continued loudly. "Who? Who is the other?"

Silence. He repeated the question, but she said not a word. He took a metallic-like scepter from his pocket and simply held it in front of her. She shook harder, but lifted her head and said quite clearly, "I tell you nothing!" He struck a hard blow to her head sideways with it, and she nearly toppled over, but quickly straightened herself, wrists tied behind her back. Silence. A few Death Eaters shifted nervously.

The man shook his head. "Then you shall die…and such a pity it is." He leaned forward and whispered one last thing, and she jerked back from him. He then drew a dagger from his belt and with one quick motion, sliced her throat open, blood staining the dagger, which he put back into his belt, oblivious to the blood. She fell to the forest floor immediately, huddle of black cloak. 

Quickly, Severus snapped back into reality. "I can't let you see the rest of this," he said to Cassi, and she was gripping her throat remotely, still staring at the figure that lay motionless on the ground. He grabbed her by the wrist and tugged at her, trying to get her to come with him. He stopped quite suddenly as he saw blood pour through her fingers, and her knees gave. He caught her at the last possible moment, and pulled her hand away from her throat, spying the great gash from ear to chin, blood oozing out and cascading down her neck.

"You killed us both," she whispered in despair, and fell limp in his arms.

"My God," Severus whispered, sitting up straight. He scanned his room quickly, and found comfort that everything was the same. Slowly, he sunk back down into his pillow, reliving the horror of the memory entangled in his dream. It had started out fairly to his liking too, but quickly delved into what all his pleasant dreams ended up to be… nightmares.

"You're not going to kill her," he whispered to himself in a stern voice, then tried to make himself sleep. _How long will you haunt me, Anya?_

***

School resumed it's normal pace on Monday, quickly falling back into the steady and memorized routine everyone in the castle knew. Cassi began a new subject with her students, hexes, which she found them surprisingly eager to learn. She let them practice on a desk, which she cleverly transfigured into a sloth, so it wasn't going to go anywhere fast. The first few days the most anyone got was a few sparks, but by the time mid-January rolled around, most people had gotten the hang of hexes and could master a hex in a few days, with the right concentration. 

However successful her classes were going, Cassi wasn't pleased. As far as what had happened that day during the dungeons, she had begun to doubt whether it actually occurred. Not a thing had changed between the two, they still battled it out on a regular basis, sometimes getting quite cutting and bitter with the other. She had begun to think that it had been some hallucination she had dreamed up, if it hadn't been for the vividness of the dream.

On a Wednesday in the middle of the first month of the new year, Cassi was walking out of her classroom, a few dusty books in hand that she was going to lend to Flitwick, when she collided with the black clad figure she knew as Snape. The books spilled out of her hands, and both regained their balance quickly, glaring at the other.

"Watch it, Talin," he hissed.

"It wasn't my fault, _Snape_," she said, scowling. "As if I would go out of my way to fall into a greasy git such as yourself. I think you've been standing next to one too many cauldron fumes."

"Are you insinuating that I'm not right in the mind?" he snapped.

"Yes, I am. Don't walk so close to my door next time," she growled, picking up her books off the floor and heading back into her room. She would give them to him at break, now was obviously not the time. It was quite to her surprise when Snape followed her into her room. She dumped the books on her desk and turned around to face him. He was watching the sloth-desk slowly creep across the floor, and she blushed and turned it back to its true form. 

"Right, what do you want?" she said, now sitting rigidly on the transformed desk and swinging her feet slightly.

"Touchy mood today, aren't we?" he sneered with a smirk, taking a step and standing directly in front of her so she couldn't swing her feet anymore.

"Yes, I'm an irritable little wench. Thanks for the underlying tones, oh great Potions master. What do you want?" She folded her arms and looked at him with uninterested expectancy. Unfortunately, she didn't expect him to lean down and softly kiss her. He stepped back, folding his arms and looking smugly pleased at the look of surprise on her face.

"…What was that for?!" she managed. 

He smirked again, and said, "You told me to do what I wanted." She had said that in the dungeon…

"Taking things out of context, I see."

"It was worth the look on your face," he said, and walked out of the room, leaving her sitting on a desk helplessly.

"You're an evil man, Snape," she whispered. "I'll make him pay for that…" She grinned.

~

Things continued like that for an additional two weeks. The students were now placing bets on who would win 'the fight' whenever it would occur. The Patil twins were convinced that Snape had already tried to curse her in her classroom once or twice, but she had avoided it narrowly because of 'expert shields she has set up around her classroom' due to some type of paranoia. Some would stop and stare at them in the hallways when they would argue, because no one wanted to miss 'the fight'.

Snape and Talin used every opportunity to be alone, but the situations were few. Both feared discovery for the sake of their jobs and their reputations, but both found it very hard to stay away from the other. She had taken to coming down to his dungeons late at night, talking with him as he graded papers. She had grown to like his dungeons, completely neat and orderly, but poorly lit with the torchlight. It didn't seem so cold after awhile, especially when they got into their arguments about potion brewing, a subject that both could intelligently argue on.

"Cassi, I don't see how you can read that rubbish," he said, exasperated when she had brought her own potions book to show him.

"Emerson Bloodstone is one of the foremost experts on potions!" she had shot back.

"His basis is all off. Wands and potions should never mix. Potions themselves are magical enough, adding wandwork only ruins the power," Severus said as he continued to grade the essays.

"Some potions don't work unless you use your wand," she replied, looking over his shoulder to see who's paper he was grading. She was sitting next to him on a stool she had conjured, looking through her book.

"Then those potions should have never been made, they were not intended to be invented by nature itself." He shook his head and made a few marks the scroll, then grabbed the next one. "Its unnatural to use a wand in brewing."

She shut the book and set it on her lap, folding her hands over it. "It personalizes the potion more. The potion has a bit of your magic in it's very essence, your faults and your strong points, it's as natural as you are. It makes for a quicker acting potion because it can adapt and work with the magic in your blood that much faster. It makes it twice as effective."

"Our bodies were not made to have additional magic in them," he said, tossing an unmarked scroll into the pile. Cassi smiled at that.

"Let me guess, Miss Granger's or Mr. Malfoy's," she said, in reference to the scroll.

"Mr. Malfoy's, you don't see me grimacing at her tiny handwriting, do you?"

"I write tiny!"

"I wouldn't know, you've never written me anything."

"You live under the same roof as I do, I don't need to send you owls. But at this rate, I might have to start. It feels like everyone is watching us… Speaking of which, I should go, it's getting late," she said with a sigh. Cassi stood up, tapped her stool with her wand so that it vanished, and left the room with a goodnight, feeling both happy and disheartened at the same time. It was hard work concealing all this from over one thousand people. She shuffled off to her room, moving quickly by the dead of night.

Never had Severus felt quite so close to someone, it was a slightly nerve wracking experience. Good things didn't happen to people like him. Ever. It was too good to be true. And it was almost frightening how well they knew each other, despite his many walls he had established long ago to ensure that no one would know his true self. The only love he had ever known wasn't this simple, wasn't this perfect. He smirked as he thought of the word perfect. Maybe perfect wasn't quite right, perfect implied no fighting or resistance. But he was rather fond of their fights, and that look of shock on her face every time he kissed her. He had come so close to asking her to stay with him tonight. So close.

***

The following Monday, Cassi was rounding the corner near the stairs to go to breakfast when she heard a commotion. She peeked around the corner just in time to see Draco and Harry locked in a battle of wands, Harry dodging a shot when his back was turned, then twirling around and hitting Draco right on with a dark green light, one of the hexes she had taught them.

"Potter and Malfoy, what _are _you doing?" she said, putting her hands on her hips, and undoing the Spasming Hex with a wave of her wand. Unfortunately, her statement was mingled with another from the other side of the corridor.

"What's going on _now_? Severus had growled as he came upon the scene.

"Draco tried to curse me-!"

"He's lying sir, he tried to hex me!"

"I should have known, Potter," hissed Snape, placing his hands on Draco's shoulders, much like a father would a son.

"Snape, you haven't even heard the entire story and you're already assuming things!" Cassi retorted, standing behind Harry. "I happened to see Malfoy trying to curse Harry when his back was turned."

"That's not true," came Draco's reply. Cassi shot Severus a look that clearly asked '_who are you going to believe, him or me_?' Severus' eyes narrowed.

"Potter, ten points from Gryffindor and you'll be serving detention with me tomorrow night. It's clearly stated in the rules that there is no using magic in the corridors," he snarled, looking straight at Cassi as he said that.

"And eleven points from Slytherin and detention with me tomorrow evening. The extra point is for attacking when someone's back is turned," she said, staring directly at Snape. "Now, you two go on to breakfast, go on. Anymore of this behavior and we're going to Dumbledore." The two left and turned to go to the Great Hall, whispering snide remarks at the other all the way down. She watched them go, then turned to Snape.

"I can not believe you took _his_ word over _mine_!"

"I did nothing of the sort!" he exclaimed. She took a step towards him so they weren't shouting from two meters away.

"I do not ask that you take my word because of me, I ask you to take my word because I am your fellow colleague and a professor of this school as much as you are," she said in a low voice, anger clearly defining each word. Severus mouth was pressed into a firm line. 

"Come with me," he said quickly. She followed him to a nearby spare classroom, and he shut the door and made sure no ghost or Peeves was in there.

"Look," he started in a quiet voice, "You have to be extremely careful with the Malfoys. Extremely. His father, Lucius Malfoy, holds a very high status in our society, not to mention he has great influence over the school board. The Malfoy boy is our tool to finding out what his father is up to, and we have to keep a delicate balance. Lucius is back with the Dark side, and is very dangerous to disagree with."

"You aren't telling me something," she said plainly.

"What?"

"You aren't telling me something, you're doing that thing with your eyes."

"What thing?"

"Now you're avoiding the subject…"

"That is no- …it doesn't matter, but Lucius has taken an interest in your classes and I wouldn't mind knowing why," he finished.

"What, do you think he'll tempt me to the Dark side?"

"I didn't say that."

"You implied it."

"No, I didn't. I really do not know why he's interested, but I would like to find out."

"Are you…worried about me?" She smiled sweetly at him. He didn't answer.

"We better go eat," he said, after a short silence. "You're so disagreeable at times." He shook his head, leaned forward and kissed her ever so softly, then left, shutting the door behind him. He distinctly heard 'Feathers have more substantial kisses!' shouted through the door at him, and was shaking his head all the way down to the Great Hall. She followed him a few minutes later, timing it carefully so as not to arouse suspicion, and she didn't. No, far from it, Harry was half surprised that neither of them were bleeding or bruised as they walked up to the table.

The next evening, Cassi heard a knock on her door, and stood to go open it, but Malfoy walked in anyway.

"Right on time," she said. He folded his arms across his desk and scowled. "Your job tonight is to use the Repairing Charm on my desks until they're like new… too many children chipping them when trying to move them around."

"If my father…" he muttered, but stopped in her icy glare.

"You're father isn't here to do this for you, now please," she said, gesturing towards the desks. He sighed and knelt next in front of the first desk. She was satisfied with this, and went back to her desk, checking over essays studiously. By the time she had finally put the last one in her tall stack, she looked up and watched Malfoy work, nearly done. He was a hard worker; he just seemed to be too cocky, too sure of himself… perhaps his father had something to do with it. She shook her head, it wasn't his fault he was like that then, but he could do with a few good lessons in manners. She dug out her grading book and was about to transfer the grades on the scrolls to her book when there was a knock at the door. With a glance back at Malfoy, she stood and opened the door. There stood Dumbledore, twiddling his thumbs, looking around her doorframe.

"Dumbledore," she said, half surprised, half pleased.

"Cassandra," he said with a smile, "May I have a word?"

She looked back one more time at Malfoy and stepped out into the hall, shutting the door. _Oh no, what is it? _Her mind raced with all the possibilities. _He's found out… how? Oh no… _

"I just wanted to say that we're having a Defense meeting tonight," he said quietly, and relief washed over her.

"Oh, what time?"

"Eleven."

"I'll be there, then."

His eye didn't catch hers. "Ah, would it be alright if you told Severus? I have to go inform other members of the staff, and travel a bit." His eyes were glinting strangely, and Cassi worried.

"Yes, I'll tell him," she said, forcing all tone out of her voice. He nodded his thanks and turned and left quickly. As soon as he was out of sight, she leaned against her door, heaving a sigh. So close, it had really scared her. _You're so paranoid. _

She shook her head and walked back into classroom. Draco was on the last table, repairing a chip in its wooden leg. He finally stood up slowly, straightening his back painfully, and said in a low voice, "I'm done."

Cassi scanned over the desks. "Good job! Very nice indeed. Alright, you may go." He left the room, scowling. She sat at her desk, thinking hard. With a large grin, she shut her grade book and left her room, locking it up and heading down to the dungeons hurriedly.

Not bothering to move quietly, she clattered down the stairs (as loudly as a person with soft-soled shoes can), and walked to the end of the torchlit hallway, where his rough wooden door was. She knocked loudly, and an irritated voice commanded her to come in.

"Snape, do you have a moment?" she said, sounding quite cross.

"Not really, I have a student in here to watch," he responded. He was sitting at his desk, eyes fixed on Harry, who was splicing what looked like serpent's tongues at a nearby table, and rather nervously too. Harry also looked quite angry, though he was biting it back.

"It's rather important," she said, tapping her foot impatiently and folding her arms. Severus glared at her skeptically, then turned on Harry.

"Fine. Potter, if you touch anything, it'll be detention for a month and fifty more points from your House," he growled, then walked with Talin to the hallway. She shut the door behind him and smiled.

"What do you want?" he asked, crossing his arms. She reached out and uncrossed them delicately, then wrapped them around her and kissed him with ferocity. Surprised, he did nothing to fight it but instead gathered her up possessively in his arms. She was drawing intricate designs with the tip of her finger on his neck and the other hand dropped down to his belt, running her fingers along it. Without thinking, he moaned into her mouth. He felt her smile.

She leaned back and smiled. "Now, Severus, I'm not a pet to be toyed with, you either kiss me properly or not at all. Oh, and there is a Defense meeting tonight at eleven, let's see how well you concentrate." Before he could even respond, she stepped out of his grasp and walked down the hall and up the stairs, Snape gawking after her.

~*~

Neither had seen or heard Harry Potter delicately shut the door, which hadn't been properly closed. He had finished slicing his last serpent's tongue and had already washed his hands and grown impatient to leave the dungeons. Seeing that the door was open a bit, he had crept over and stealthily peeked through the crack, catching the professors doing quite the opposite of what he had expected. He had to step back, take off his glasses and rub his eyes then put his glasses back on and look back through the crack to believe what he saw. But there they were, both seeming rather content with their situation.

Harry shut the door slowly and walked back to the desk, rather pale. He knew that he had found out something that Snape would never want him, or anyone else, to ever know. He smiled at this newfound information…


	7. The Problem with Secrets

****

Author's Note: TADA!!! It's here! The moment you've all been waiting for! Aren't you happy?! I know this took forever and a half to put out, but hopefully its length makes up for something… the thing is 31 pages on Word. Sheesh, they wouldn't shut up. You might want to go back and reread the last chapter's ending just to refresh your patient memories.

I want to warn you right now, right very now, that this is one of my most controversial chapters. If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. It's **not** rated R, I would say it's still **PG-13**, but it toes the line and I don't want anyone coming to me complaining that I've corrupted your mind. You're here, aren't you? Isn't that corrupted enough? We've got the usual language, violence, and slight adult content. Just like last time except sort of turned up a notch. Ok, that's my speech.

As always, I don't own anyone except Cassi, Simon, and _Her_ (who we can now refer to as Anya…the pieces of the puzzle start falling into place). The rest belong to JK Rowling, the literary genius. And I'm not making money off this either. Psh, like this would make me money… 

Read and review or I'll hold the next chapter hostage! :D Kidding, of course, because I have a feeling you would skin me alive if I did that, but do review, I love reviews! Thank you, enjoy the chapter, email me if you want to! Have fun!

****

Chapter 7: The Problem with Secrets

10:50, time to go to the Defense meeting. Cassi shut her grade book, replaced her quill and sealed her inkpot, then locked up her classroom and headed down the dark hallways. The only source of light in the dark corridors was the weak beams of light from the quarter moon shining through the large windows, painting the portraits and suits of armor along the walls of the hallway with their silvery white light. She was quite eager to see what sort of state Severus was in, especially since she left him on such odd terms. Quite pleased with how that had turned out, she smiled to herself. The smile quickly faded though as she stopped, listening for footsteps. However, there was nothing to be heard, so she continued walking, senses alert. Within a few steps, she got the feeling she was being followed, and in a few more steps…

"Cassi? Where are you going?" called a familiar voice. Fretting slightly, she turned around and faced him. _Oh, just Simon._

"I was just…going to see Dumbledore," she half lied. He nodded and stared down at his feet as he came to a stop in front of her. "What ah, what are you doing up so late?" Her inquiry was made to sound light, but she was seriously curious.

"I was walking. I couldn't sleep," Simon replied shyly. Cassi was about to nod, when she noticed something.

"Were you going outside too?" she asked, gently touching his traveling cloak. He nodded again. _There's nothing wrong with going outside when you can't sleep, _she thought to herself. "It's rather cold, don't get sick." 

He caught her hand up and looked her in the eye. "Hey, are you ok? You've been acting strangely lately." His blue eyes were alight with concern

"I've just been in an odd mood, it's nothing important." She sounded very reassuring, though not entirely honest.

"Alright, if you say so," he said, still looking right through her it seemed. He kissed her hand, winked, and went on his way, the click of his shoes against the floor fading away. She took two steps to go about her ways when a deep voice hissed at her.

"And _what_, pray tell, was that about?" came the angry reply from a dark corner near her. She jumped and whirled around, then placed a hand over her heart as Severus emerged from the shadows, dark and tall. His eyes were glittering slits of envy. Her slight panic lessened.

She smiled slightly to herself, then put a hand on her hip. "Have you sunk so low as to spy on me?"

"Yes," he hissed, "and apparently you need spying on. Secret night rendezvous with Harper?" 

"We didn't plan it, he was going for a walk." She became quite curious when he suddenly glanced down the hall and a look of serious concern crossed his face fleetingly. It cleared quickly though and he returned his harsh gaze to her eyes. "What would you like me to say, Severus? Yes, I'm having a passionate love affair with the Muggle Studies professor?" He visibly tensed, and grabbed her wrist up, pulling her to him, something he did quite often but it always sent shivers up her spine and he knew that.

"Are you just purposely trying to make me jealous?" he asked crossly, eyes narrowing.

"Yes, now do not spy on me again."

"Innocent people have nothing to hide."

"Severus, you're such a prat sometimes. A prat with no reason to be jealous," she said while breaking his grasp and sliding her arms loosely around his neck. He relaxed slightly, and she kissed him.

"You do realize that we are in the middle of a hallway," he whispered to her. 

"It's dark," she justified. She laughed softly and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling of his arms around her. 

"Cassi…" he started, and she peered up at him curiously. 

"Yes?" 

"…we're going to be late for the meeting," he finished quietly and lamely, and she knew that he had not said what he meant, but she nodded and let go.They walked with each other down the hall silently until they were almost to the gargoyle.

She smiled coyly at him and asked, "Do you think Sirius will be there?"

"He was there last time, the git! He better not be…" he said with a scowl. Cassi smirked and whispered the password to the gargoyle, then stepped through the doorway, down the hall and into Dumbledore's office. There were already a few people there, and they watched both Cassi and Snape walk in. Snape folded his arms and found a seat far away from an older, tired looking man with sandy color hair, the only other one actually seated, as the others were standing. 

The man stood and caught her attention before she sat down near Severus, and she stood behind her chair and waited for him to walk to her.

"Are you Cassandra?" he asked quietly, with a firm yet tired tone. On closer inspection, he was not any older than Severus was if she had to guess, but extremely tired. She nodded. "Hello, I'm Remus Lupin, I work with Sirius. I believe you've met him." He smiled at this and offered his hand, and she shook it. Snape was sitting in his chair darkly, arms crossed and eyes trained on something far away. "Yes, well, he asked me to give you this." He offered her a small slip of parchment from his pocket, and she took it and read the markings on it.

She grinned widely and pocketed the parchment. "Thank you," she said to Remus.

"Sirius said I'm to flirt shamelessly with you, but I think I will let him take care of that," said Lupin with a grin, running his fingers through his sandy hair that was streaked with gray. 

"That sounds like him," she said with a smile. There was a slight pause as they shook their heads with a smile, thinking about Sirius.

"Ah, Lupin. You're back," said Severus finally with a sneer, looking up from his tunneled vision.

"Snape," he said coldly, though it was intended to be a greeting. Remus returned his attention to Cassi and dismissed himself, saying that it was nice to meet her. He returned to his seat quickly and she sat down next to Severus.

"Let me guess, he is Sirius' close friend from school and you hate him through association," she said, rolling her eyes.

"Not quite. I have a reason to hate him. He nearly killed me when I was sixteen," Severus said, dropping his voice to a low whisper and venom dripping from every word. Surprised, she was about to ask the details when Dumbledore appeared at the door.

"Sorry for being late, I had to round up our last few members. Not to worry, they're not completely frozen," he said with a chuckle at a few people followed him in, look particularly cold. They took seats randomly around the table, and Dumbledore clapped his hands together once and announced, "Let's begin!"

~

Harry had walked back to the Gryffindor Commons deep in thought. Having just emerged from his detentions in the dungeons, he felt he had gone in empty handed and come out with a priceless treasure. Now how to spend the treasure was his dilemma…

Morals or revenge, revenge or morals? On one hand he had been given a gift, he had the most personal thing a person could know about someone, on the other, he had been burdened with it. Snape deserved for this to be printed in papers and spread across the school faster than the blink of an eye. But did Talin?

"No," he whispered to himself. She had saved him from Snape's wrath more than once, and this was as much about her as it was him. He considered this as he walked. Snape needed a taste of his own medicine; he needed to know what it felt like to be at someone else's mercy. But morally, it was wrong. "It's just wrong all around!"

He would have never suspected them. Never. They fought continually, people were _betting_ on who would win their big fight, which was sworn to be soon. They argued, bickered, snapped, and smirked, other teachers had to tell them to stop in the presence of the children. They had the arguing in public down to an art. This was unreal to him, and more than once did he doubt what he saw. Yet he had seen it, in much too much detail. He began to wonder how long this had gone on, it was clearly evident that this was nothing new to them. A month? Two? How was he to tell? Façades were obviously something both were good at, for they had over one thousand people fooled. He wondered if anyone else knew…

Harry found his feet had led him straight to the portrait of the Fat Lady, snoozing comfortably.

"Ocean potion," he said loudly, trying to catch the portrait's attention. Startled, she sat up, peering around, then upon spying him, swung open. He stepped through it and found himself in the familiar Common room, and he sighed. Hermione and Ron were waiting up for him, Hermione reading on the couch and Ron sorting his cards from his Chocolate Frogs on his knee in his chair by the fireside.

"Harry, you're back early! How did it…" asked Hermione, but her question died as she caught the look of concentration on Harry's face. "What happened?!"

"What did Snape do this time?" asked Ron. Harry walked silently over to a chair across from Ron and looked pensive. He ought to tell them; Snape had crossed the lines with Ron and Hermione one too many times for him not to. He nodded once and tried to figure out how to word this, but only managed to shake his head.

"Guessing game time!" Ron said playfully, and he sat up more attentively, cards abandoned in his lap. "Alright, let's see… it happened while you were at detention?" He peered over at Harry intently, who nodded again.

"Did he say something?"

"No."

"Hmm, a first, usually it's him shooting off his big mouth. Hmm, was it something he did?"

"More or less… what's the one thing you can't imagine Snape doing?"

Ron's face split into a wide grin. "I knew it! He was hopping around in a bunny suit, wasn't he?" Hermione dissolved into giggles, and Harry grinned too.

"Not quite Ron. About the same level of surprise, but I don't think he's going to be pretending to be a rabbit anytime soon." Harry laughed quietly to himself.

"I dunno then, I give up. You have any ideas Hermione?" asked Ron, quite curious by now and very eager to get it out of Harry.

"Well… no. I don't even try to understand Snape. He may be a very worthy professor, but he's a horrible person," she said firmly, and she touched her mouth with her hand, obviously remembering the comments he made about her teeth when they were elongated in her fourth year.

"No doubt about that. Ok, well, I didn't really expect you to guess anyway, it's too weird to guess. Alright, but you must promise not to tell anyone because I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet," he said quickly, dropping his voice. The others leaned closer to him, intent on hearing this. "I was in the dungeon, splicing serpents tongues when Professor Talin came in and pulled Snape out into the hallway… and, well, the door is crooked on the hinges and I was done…" 

"You spied on them? Harry, if you had been caught!" came Hermione's horrified reply.

"I know, I know, but I didn't. …Ron, do you still have three Sickles on Talin for the fight?" asked Harry. Ron nodded, confused. "You better pull your bets, because I don't think we'll see them fighting anytime soon." Now Harry was having a bit of fun with this, fulfilling a small portion of his revenge on Snape. _Vengeance is sweet_, he thought. 

"What do you mean? They always fight; it's a matter of time. And I'm pretty sure she could knock him out before he even kne-" began Ron, but he stopped mid-sentence and stared hard at Harry. "Harry, wait wait wait. Let's go over this one more time. You were spying on them in the hallway, and you don't think the fight is going to happen because…?" He left his question open, and silence filled the room. Then Ron started laughing, and continued to do so for a very long time. He fell out of his chair, cards scattering over the floor, howling with laughter. Harry was now finding it very funny indeed, and was having problems not laughing out himself. Hermione just gave them both very odd looks.

Finally, Ron calmed down enough to lie on the floor and breathe a bit more normally. "You have GOT to be kidding me, Harry! Tell me you're joking! Those two?!"

"I'm not lying, Ron."

"An ugly git like him? Snape? Are we thinking of the same person?"

"How many other Snapes do you know?"

"None. That is so impossible! Are you sure you don't need your glasses checked?"

"Ron! I swear I saw it correctly! I'm just as stumped as you are…"

Hermione stood up at this point, frustrated. "Could you two please tell me what's going on? I think I missed the punch line to the joke," she said hotly, glaring at the two boys.

"Hermione, I think Harry caught Snape and Talin…" began Ron, but he dissolved into gales of laughter, tears soon pouring down his face.

"Snogging," Harry filled in for him. Hermione's eyes went round and she sat back down.

"Oh," she said quietly in shock. After a few stunned seconds of silence, all three burst into laughter, laughing until they were all crying. It was a wonder no one heard them they were laughing so loud, it echoed off the stone walls and reverberated around the room. The laughter would die down and they would look at each other and in unison think "_Snape…snogging…_" and it would start back up again.

"I don't know what you're going to do about this, but it better be good!" Hermione finally managed. 

"I'll figure out what to do soon enough," Harry said, sighing in an attempt to settle down. He stared into the fire flickering in the fireplace, examining his situation. He'd decide tomorrow what to do.

~

"Therefore, I need everyone to please keep aware. The silence of the Dark side will be over one day, and we need to be ready for it," ended Dumbledore in a sobering tone, and everyone in the Defense meeting nodded and stood. They milled around for a few minutes, just chatting generally. Cassi was hanging back, trying to keep her distance from Snape (she didn't want it to be so obvious), and watching everyone discuss the meeting. Severus stayed in his chair, glaring menacingly at the wall across from him. Lupin looked slightly uncomfortable across the table, and stood to leave shortly after the meeting was dismissed. 

As he was exiting the door, Snape hissed, "Full moon in a week, Lupin." Lupin's shoulders slumped slightly and he looked very tired, but his eyes flashed with anger and he opened his mouth to speak, then snapped it shut. Cassi shot Severus a glare as soon as Lupin left, and he glared back. She then rolled her eyes and crossed her arms, exasperated with _certain _people's cruelty. He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, frustrated with her ability to side with his enemies merely because they have something against him.

"I'm going to go now," she said, and was out of the room before he could say anything, stalking down the dark hall with her arms still folded. Her shoes made lonely pattering sounds as she wandered down the halls, nearing her room. As she turned to walk down her classroom's corridor, she nearly ran into someone.

"Dammit Severus! Stop popping up from no where!" she exclaimed. "How did you get in front of me?"

"I know my way around," Severus said nonchalantly. She tried to walk around him to get to her classroom but he held out an arm and caught her, pulling her into his arms, holding her back to his chest and locking her in front of him with arms around her body. "I don't think so. You are a very difficult thing to understand, do you know that? One moment I can't pry you off me with all the magic I posses, the next you're attempting to make me jealous, and then you pretend I don't exist. I believe it was you who said you were not a pet to be toyed with?" He whispered all this in her ear softly, and she was closing her eyes, listening.

"What can I say? I'm fickle," she said, opening her eyes and looking up at him, blinking sweetly. 

"That's pathetically cute," he sneered, and she smiled. He looked down at her for a moment, taking in the image of her in his arms, smiling up at him. It nearly startled him what a drastic change had come over her, even from the weeks before. Two months ago she was a shell of a witch, both emotionally and physically, and now she was nearly unrecognizable as the former deathly sick and empty person she once was. What still amazed him (and he noted this quite often in the same confused manner) was still the fact that another person could mean so much to him and care so much for him. It scared him at times to have that kind of bond with another, he had protected against it for so long that it was second nature to shun people. If you loved no one, no one could hurt you. But this was out of his control, a fearful thrill to him.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, leaning her head back on his shoulder.

"My thoughts are my own," he replied simply, and kissed her temple softly, trailing kisses down her cheek and coming to her neck. She paused, letting him continue out until he reached the neckline of her robes. Kisses evolved into small bites, and her heart beat out of control when she felt a hand drop to her hip, fingers playing across her hip bone. He slipped a hand into her pocket and procured the slip of paper from Sirius. 

"Damn him! It's in Russian!" he whispered to her neck, still holding her to him as he looked at the paper. 

She laughed and snatched the paper from, slipping it into her other pocket. "What did I tell you about being jealous, eh? It doesn't say anything threatening, Professor Snape, and we'll leave it at that. Honestly, you're so protective."

"It's not like I can help it with mongrels like Black about," he sighed.

She laughed. "Come see me tomorrow at break?"

"Fine, fine," he drawled tiredly. She leaned forward and kissed him softly, prolonging it slightly.

"Then you can tell me what your problem with Lupin is, besides the fact that he's a werewolf," she said, and she winked at him and walked past him. "I'm not the Defense teacher for nothing, Severus!" she called down the hallway, and disappeared into her classroom. He shook his head and headed down to his hallowed dungeons.

The next morning, Cassi jerked awake just before the sun was beginning to rise. Sitting up, she drew her knees to her chest, trying not to think about the dream she had just had as she stared out the window. More blood, more screams and pleads, and those icy hands had now driven themselves into her nightmares. And there was something else now, dark figures in robes and low murmurs, making the dream all the more horrifying.

"You'd think I'd be used to it by now," she said to herself, and she swung her legs over the bedside and got dressed. When she had set down her brush with the last stroke of her hair, she ran her fingers through her hair, and looked into the mirror. She noticed a light pink mark on her neckline when her robes were skewed, and she smirked. _He can pay later_… She straightened her robes and let a lock of hair fall over her shoulder, just in case. With this, she picked up her grade book and left. As soon as she had shut the door in her office, she set down her book at her desk and recorded a few of the homework assignments, working placidly in the silence. When she had the last grade down, she shut her book and headed off to breakfast. Snape was, of course, already there, but took no notice of her. She had expected this type of reception, and silently continued through breakfast, only eating a roll and a few slices of fruit.

"Don't even think about it, Snape," she commented while grabbing a slice of apple, eyes never leaving it. He shut his mouth, which had been formerly open to make a comment on the lack of meat in her diet.

"You assume too much," he murmured, and finished in silence. She smiled and watched him leave, then went back to her food, counting the hours until break. It amazed her how much she looked forward to seeing him, when it was only two months ago that she would have rather shoved him into a closet and locked him there than merely converse with him. And he was probably the reason she was still in existence today. But it wasn't only gratitude she felt towards him, it was something very different, something much deeper…

She shook her head and finished her meal, wondering how far she'd let her mind wander about him.

Her first class was Gryffindor fifth years today, and she had bookwork planned for them today instead of the usual hands-on projects. Like normal, she waited for them perched on her stool, sitting stiff-backed and emotionlessly, watching them file in. She noted that the infamous trio of Harry and company skirted her today, keeping very close together and talking very quietly. She wondered what was going on, but dismissed it as something trivial and did not think about it after that. The bell rang, she called role, and then wrote the assignment on the board, much to the dismay of her students, who hated her lengthy bookwork. When she was done, she settled down in her desk and continued on her grading, which seemed to be a never-ending cycle. The only sound in the room was quill tips scratching on the parchment and the occasional flipping of pages. This tranquility continued until the end of the period when the bell rang when a scraping of chair arose, and the rustling of bags and books prevailed. Only one more class…

"Only one more insolent class," growled Snape to himself as he flipped through his notes quickly. He began to scribble the directions for the potion they were making today on the board, not going to waste time going through the notes with them, they can read just like anyone else can. The fifth year Gryffindors drudged in, reluctantly setting up their cauldrons as Snape finished with the instructions. 

"Set this up, it's a simple potion, even a group like you shouldn't have problems with this," he barked to them once the bell rang. They shifted uneasily. "I'll be coming around to check your potions at the end of the hour for a quiz grade. Well, what are you waiting for? Begin!" With this, he stalked over to his desk in the corner and went over the role. He didn't have to call names, he knew everyone (unfortunately). Once role was checked, he proceeded to finish grading the last group of tests he had not yet finished until class was half way done. There was a low murmur of voices as people chatted nervously, along with the quiet simmering of cauldrons and the hiss of the fire. A pungent smell filled the air. Snape closed his eyes for one moment and, blocking out the children's voices, listened to the soothing tones of the potions boiling in unison. He snapped out of it quickly and stood, walking around the room and looking at everyone's progress. He quickly found himself busy scolding Neville, who had dropped his moth wings in whole and had made his potion nearly a solid.

When Harry saw Snape swoop down on Neville like an overgrown bat, he found himself suppressing laughter. Hermione, sitting to his left, kicked him hard in the shins.

"Harry, stop it!" she commanded shrilly, yet in a very soft whisper. "You're going to get into trouble."

"Harry, Snape's right there!" said Ron, but he clapped a hand over his mouth to keep himself from laughing as well.

"I'm sorry, it's just… it's just too funny! All I can think is Snape swooping down on Talin, and her slapping him, then pouncing on him-" Harry began in a whisper, choking back stifled laughter.

"-with her tongue down his throat!" said Ron from underneath his hand. All three hung their heads, shoulders shaking with laughter. Most unfortunately for them, Snape had straightened up and stopped sneering at Neville just in time to hear the entire last of their conversation. He whirled around on his heels and strode over to them, dark eyes as set as cold tunnels, showing no emotion whatsoever.

"Having problems, Mr. Potter?" he asked, arriving at their table sharply. His voice was slightly strained, and his hands were clenching and unclenching themselves, as if wishing to be around the boy's neck.

"No sir," Harry said, face going blank. He glared up at the professor, who was seething.

"See me after class. And five points off Gryffindor for your attitude," he growled extremely tensely, but something flashed in his eyes that Harry caught: fear. Harry had him right where he wanted him. He smirked at Snape's retreating figure, escaping to his office.

__

How could he have found out? What? When? That brat, after all the times he had saved his pathetic neck, the boy has the nerve to hold his job over his head, dangling it on a string like a cat with a mouse's tail trapped in it paws. Severus tried to compose himself and succeeded after a few moments. With dark dignity, he opened the door, grabbed his grade book and walked to the first table, looking into the depths of the first cauldron, a dark purple potion glaring up at him. He scratched a passing grade into his book and continued down the desks, winding his way up the rows until he at last reached Potter's. A perfect potion simmered in front of him, and Harry watched Snape with cocky interest. He scratched a grade next to _Potter, Harry_, a barely passing one at that, and glared at him.

"Time to clean up, wash the sinks out, I don't want this all over or you'll be cleaning my room next time," he announced to the class, eyes never leaving Harry's. Harry narrowed his eyes and glared back; gone were the days he let people push him around. There was a fortunate distraction as Seamus dropped his cauldron at the sink, leaving a puddle at the boy's feet. With one last threatening glare, Severus tore his eyes from Harry and stalked over to Seamus, boiling the puddle with his wand, eventually evaporating it.

"Foolish children," he mumbled distractedly to himself. "Next class period, I expect two scrolls on correct dungeon procedure!" He shouted this last portion to the rest of the class, and a bell rung. Students began to file quickly out of the room, eager to escape, but the infamous trio hung back, eventually becoming just one person, Harry Potter, still sitting at his desk quietly, hands folded over the surface of the table. Snape shut the door behind the students, but heard an odd creaking noise as he stepped away. That's when he noticed that the door was ill balanced and was difficult to shut when not shut purposefully. And that's also when he realized how Harry had found out… the door swung open a few inches, giving a good view of the hallway outside. He glared at the door, then over to Harry. With a swish of his robes, he strode over to Harry's desk, standing in front of it.

"Care to repeat that little comment you made earlier with your faithful freckly sidekick Weasley?" growled Snape, folding his arms across his chest.

"I think you heard us the first time," Harry replied, almost sounding bored.

"I will not be spoken to in such a flippant manner!" Snape hissed. He paused, then began again. "How much did you see?"

"Enough to know this has been going on awhile," came Harry's reply.

"You insolent child! How dare you-"

"No, how dare _you!_ I have quietly listened to your prattles about my parents for 6 years, and I won't stand for it anymore. One word in reference to my parents, family, or friends and I'll go straight to the Patil twins with this. They can spread word faster than you can blink," he said boldly, half surprised with himself. It had been a long time bottled in, a long time coming to Snape.

A think silence filled the air, then Snape asked, "Are you _blackmailing_ me, Potter?"

"Not really, just sort of. It's not like I'm asking for money, I'm just asking you to keep your comments to yourself," said Harry, and he saw Snape tense.

"I refuse to be blackmailed by a small child," he snapped at Harry.

"Ok then. Let's see, I've got Divinations next… oh, Parvati's favorite subject-"

"You wouldn't dare…"

"Wouldn't I?" asked Harry with a dangerous glimmer in his eyes. "I'll keep it to myself for now." And with that, he picked up his bag and walked out of the room, leaving Snape gawking in all his fury.

~

When the bell rang and the students emptied out of her room, Cassi shut the door with glee and went back to her desk quickly, busying herself with some random paperwork so as not to look to eager that Snape would be coming. Sure enough, a few minutes later, the handle of her door rattled slightly and it swung open, and in stomped a very angry Severus. Alarmed, Cassi looked up and watched him.

"What? What is it?" she asked him as he shut the door, seemingly checking that it was indeed shut.

"We've been found out," came the dark reply, a low seething growl from his snarling lips. He turned to her now that he was satisfied the door was shut, walking up to her desk and glaring down at her.

"What are you talking about?"

"Potter and his little gang know about us. He knows, and he's blackmailing us." Silence, then….

"What?! How is that possible?" Cassi stood as she said this, though her shoulders were dropped in defeat and her eyes darted around wildly as if looking for the answer.

"I found out that my dungeon door wasn't shut properly when you were, eh, _informing_ me of the meeting in the hallway," said Snape, crossing his arms.

"Oh no, you mean he saw that? Why was he spying on us in the first place? Why didn't the door shut? And why the hell are you looking at me like that?!" Cassi's hands were at her hips haughtily in a second, and it was like the last few months never happened, they were back to square one, fighting.

"I'm not looking at you like anything, and don't argue with me about that," he sneered as he saw her open her mouth to object to his comment, then snapped it shut. "And yes, he did see that, because _someone_ didn't shut the door correctly!"

"Then something is wrong with your door because I was sure it was shut!"

"If you had been paying attention enough, you would have seen that the door frame is off and the door won't shut properly, but you were too preoccupied with other things!"

"It's probably off the frame because you've slammed it half a thousand times, scaring your students half to death! And now he's blackmailing us because you've been a bastard to him too many times!"

"He has no right to do that either way! Don't tell me you're siding with him!" Snape said irately in total disbelief.

"I'm not siding with him, Severus! Honestly, you're really one to talk about taking sides, constantly siding with your own House, never mind that the other students may be right!" Cassi's accent was dominating her speech, and her eyes were flashing. How dare he blame this on her!

"As if you don't have your favorites! And now look at what your favorite has done!"

"He might not have had to do it if you hadn't given him a reason! Ack, what are we going to do?"

"We can't do anything. There's nothing to be done, and I refuse to bend to his will," growled Snape.

"What were his terms?"

"I'm not to speak ill of anyone or thing he likes, and I refuse to repress my well-needed lectures." 

"Gods, must you pick on everyone? Harry, his friends, his parents, Sirius, Remus, ME… you only protect yourself and things you _think_ belong to you!" Cassi stopped, surprised with herself, but stood her ground.

"I will not listen to this anymore!" seethed Snape in a loud voice. 

"Then leave! I'm done being blamed for things that are not my fault, now go off to sulk in your dungeons, thinking about what a horrid person I am. Go on, go!" She glared at him, and without another word, he left, slamming the door behind him. For a few seconds, Cassi could only stand there, watching the door, then she collapsed into her chair covering her eyes with her hands. Her job would be gone when word got out. She would move again, working in low paying jobs. And she would leave behind the only person she cared about…

She choked back tears. Upon thinking her last statement, her heart wrenched and broke, and she wished she could take it all back. But she couldn't. Drying her eyes roughly with her palms, she composed herself and compulsively organized her desk.

~

__

That went well, thought Snape to himself sarcastically upon arriving in his empty dungeon. He had already averted his eyes from the damn door that started it all, and from the wall near his desk (he had commanded to himself to stop attaching memories to inanimate objects, but no such luck). Even this place was haunted with memories, and it threatened to smother him.

He had not intended to make her angry, nor to fight with her, but it somehow came out that way. It always came out as anger whenever he wanted to express something… anger was a way of masking his fear. But fear of what? Rumor? Loss of profession? Respect, power… or something else…Cassi? She was already infuriated with him and he had hurt her badly, he had seen it in her eyes.

__

What can I possibly do? On one hand, he could keep his opinions to himself and lose all self-dignity to the brat, on the other, he could be himself and lose everything. Either way, he was trapped, and so was she. There was nothing he could do, the only thing he could think of was to wait it out. And wait he did.

One day turned into two, and two to three. Before long, a week had passed, a silent week of nerve wracking waiting. On the outside, it appeared as if nothing had changed. Snape had kept to himself, and Harry had kept his word. Cassi had not spoken with Snape in seven days, and she felt she was dying a slow death, a death of starvation of Severus. No matter how much she wanted to say something, to apologize for what she said, she couldn't. He was struggling as well, he ought to say something but the words weren't coming to him. So meal after meal passed and not a word was said between them, just a few sideways glances. 

That Wednesday morning, things were going as normal for Severus. He awoke, grabbed a robe out of his closet, got dressed, brushed his hair (pointless, as always) and continued out of his room and entered his classroom. Torches lit themselves and brought the room to light in a yellow glow just as the sun was beginning to rise. He grabbed a quill off his desk distractedly, but stopped halfway through the motion as he noticed something was out of place. A crisp parchment letter sat blankly on his desk with nothing written on it except 'S. Snape'. Abandoning the quill, he grabbed up the letter and opened it roughly. He extracted a clean sheet of paper from it and scanned over it, then read through it once again, alarmed. Without a moment's hesitation, he put the letter back in its envelope and the envelope into his pocket, then left his room for Dumbledore's office.

***

Cassi poked her food around her plate, depressed. Seven days. Seven. She had hoped he would at least be at breakfast, but not even that. Dimly did she notice that Dumbledore wasn't occupying his normal at the center of the table either. She pushed her chair back and left the table.

***

The bell signaled the end of first class and people left Snape's class in quick shuffles. Dumbledore had given Severus a lot to think about, but he didn't have much time to actually think. He would be leaving in a few hours time, leaving to the last place he never wanted to be. Leaving and not exactly sure when or if he would be returning. He would travel light, bringing nothing with him save his wand. Somehow he felt he was forgetting something.

It clicked in his head at once, the one thought he had been successfully suppressing until this very moment. He was leaving Cassi on horrible terms. He didn't know what to do or say. On one hand, he could go (with the possibility of not returning) with his reputation for being a cruel, strict, yet loyal person in tact but leave Cassi to her own misery (if she would feel misery, that is). On the other, he could right things with her before he goes, possibly break her heart with his absence and be morphed in people's minds. He cared what others thought, he supposed it was some sort of compensation for being a Death Eater, and it took every ounce to keep his image up; if he slipped once, everyone fell back on the memory of his days of working for the Dark Lord.

The clock ticked annoyingly, ticking seconds of his time away, seconds of his life away. He made his decision after a few moments of contemplation and stood up to leave the room.

***

Cassi was walking glumly from the library down the main hallway amid the sea of students. She carried three rolls of parchment in her arms, notes she had been taking from a book in the library since she stopped spending her free time with _him. _She sighed as people pushed all around her in a struggle to get to class. It was about that time that she heard someone call her name, but she ignored them and continued shuffling along, pushing a strand of hair away from her face and behind her ear.

"Cassandra," called the voice again, and upon recognition of the voice, she turned around to see Severus Snape walking along the side of the hallways where there were fewer students. She waited for him to catch up, and he stood before her soon enough.

"Yes, Snape?" she said in a cool tone as he soon as he caught up with her. She surprised herself with that tone, but realized it was probably appropriate since they were in a huge hallway filled with unsuspecting students. He looked very sure of himself, almost stubbornly so, and she wondered what he was going to pick on her for this time (though any amount of picking was at least some attention).

"What have I told you about calling me Snape?" he asked in a growl. She was about to make some saucy reply when the next thing she knew, his hands were on her shoulders and his lips were pressed to hers firmly, and she dropped all her scrolls to reach up and touch his face. The sound of the scrolls hitting the ground was quite audible, as the entire hallway of students had gone silent in a sudden wave. A collective gasp was heard. Finally he let go and she opened her eyes slowly to see a circle of half-sick, half-shocked students forming around them.

"What are you all staring at? Get to class!" snapped Severus in a dangerous growl, and the sound returned to the main hall as hundreds of people broke out of their silence and began to class in quick whispers, still maintaining a safe distance from the two.

"Severus Snape! What was that for?!" asked Cassi once her senses had returned to her.

"I need to talk to you directly after the last class. Meet me at the iron gates," he said in a lowered voice, and she nodded, blue-violet eyes filled with curiosity. "He can't blackmail us anymore."

"No, he can't, can he? I suppose that solves that problem…" she said, and she bent down and picked up her scrolls. "I'm still amazed at you… _public affection_…" She shook her head at him, still living in a semi-dream like state as she walked on to her class just as the minute bell rang. 

She arrived to class just in time. All the students were sitting in their desks, not making a single sound as soon as they heard the door open. Unruffled, she strode across her room, dumped her scrolls on her desk and picked up her attendance. All their 'here's were very small.

Exasperated, she sighed then said to them in a dry tone, "If anyone has any comments over what you have undoubtedly heard or seen about the professor and myself, kindly ask _him_ about it. I'm sure he would simply _love_ to answer your questions. Clear?" They nodded knowing full and well that no one would dare to do it. "Good! Alright, today's hex is a test of your deflection shields as well…"

All of her classes went like this. The students seemed subdued with shock, but this worked perfectly for Cassi, for she had much to think about. Quite honestly, she was surprised Dumbledore hadn't swooped down on her already and condemned her to banishment. And she wanted to know what Severus was going to say after school. Severus. She shivered when she thought his name. She hadn't thought he was capable of doing such a thing, not that she was objecting. The stress of the past week had been lifted off her shoulders, now she just had to wait and see what her punishment was for enjoying that kiss so much.

The bell sounded before dinner and the students began to file to the Great Hall for dinner. Cassi hung back and walked down the empty corridors, preferring to avoid all confrontations about today's events. Briskly, she walked down the hall and past the doors of the Great Hall to come to a stop at the giant wooden doors of the entrance of Hogwarts. Grabbing the wrought iron handle, she pulled it open and gasped at the coldness as it blasted in. However, she continued out the door and began trekking through the snow covered path to the iron gates where a figure in black was waiting for her. Her feet began to feel numb as she trudged through ankle high snow, but she finally made it down to him.

He was leaning against the gates but stood up when he saw her coming. When she stopped in front of him, neither said anything for a moment. The she began, "Severus, why are we out here?"

"I'm leaving," he said in a monotone voice.

"What?! Why? Where? When will you be back?"

"I got a letter this morning… A letter from Lucius. I've been invited back to the Inner Circle of the Dark Lord," he said without emotion. 

"No, Severus! You can't go back to them! It could be a trap!" Cassandra was usually a fairly calm person, but this was the worst news she had heard, ever.

"What choice have I? If I go, I can continue to bring information for our side, or possibly walk into a trap. If I don't go, I've outwardly declared my repentance of Voldemort and I will be killed." Finally some emotion had been procured with this statement, but it came out more as this hopeless sort of anger. Without thinking, Cassi found herself in his arms, holding him tightly.

"I don't want you to go," she whispered. "When are you leaving? When are you coming back?"

"As soon as Dumbledore gets here, I'll go. As for coming back… I do not know. Tonight, tomorrow, a week, a month…" He trailed off.

"I hate this! Did Dumbledore agree to this?"

"We discussed it. It's the best thing to do."

"Hardly," was her reply, but she didn't say anything else. The bitter wind blew their robes to flutter with the breeze. He knew she was heartbroken, but he couldn't neglect this, as badly as he wanted to. Finally, she sighed and let go of him.

"We have horrible luck, don't we?" she managed weakly.

He smiled faintly. "I thought you didn't believe in luck or jinxes."

"Yes, that's true. But I believe in fate, and fate seems to be playing games with our lives."

"It has done that to me more times than I can count," he responded.

"Let's see fate toy with this," she said, and caught him into a sweet kiss, simple but overwhelming in the impact of emotion it carried. He found her hands and grasped them in his own, both savoring the moment with a bittersweet feeling. Finally, she felt his warm breath on her lips but didn't open her eyes. She was going to say it now, something she had been compelled to say for a long time.

"I…I love you Severus," she whispered to him. Shocked, he raised his eyebrows. She knew he wouldn't say it back, not because he didn't mean it, but because he could not say it out loud. However, another painfully sweet kiss from him told her all she needed to know.

"Do you know how much harder that makes it to leave? And if I don't come back…" he whispered back, lips softly grazing hers.

"Don't say that. Don't. You're coming back to me, I'll be waiting for you." He was about to say something but he caught a glance of something moving near the castle.

"Dumbledore is coming," he said with resign. Immediately, he felt rushed. "Cassi, I need you to promise me something."

"Anything."

"Promise me you won't go near Harper."

"Don't tell me you're still jealous-"

"It's not jealousy. Cassi, trust me, you have to stay away from him. I don't trust him, please." His pleading grew more urgent as Dumbledore drew nearer. 

"I'll do it, but I would like to point out that you trust very few people. But if makes you sleep easier, I'll do it."

"It does. He's here." He was shaking slightly now, and she was practically in tears. He kissed her softly, kissing her goodbye. The crunch of snow beneath feet grew louder and louder until it eventually stopped, very close to them both.

"Public displays of affection, what does the teacher's code say about that?" asked Dumbledore, but when Cassi turned to look at him, still wrapped up in Severus' arms, she noticed he was smiling.

"Strictly prohibited," both said in unison. She leaned her head on his chest, plain defiance of the teacher's code.

"Just try to keep it out of the student's view. We don't need them running off with ideas on what they can do in the hallways," he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

"That's it? You're not going to fire us? What about the school board?" asked Cassi. Severus was shocked with this. They had both figured there would be more to it than a warning not to snog each other in plain sight (which neither really intended to do- it was enough that the student's knew there would not be a fight between them).

"That's it. What the school board doesn't know won't hurt them, and we don't have a rule on faculty relationships, technically. And now I technically owe Minerva a Sickle. I figured you'd hold out for a bit longer, Besides, they have other things to worry about," he said, starting off playful (much to their dropped-jaw disbelief and objections when they heard of his bet) and ending on a serious note, reminding them of the situation at hand.

"Cassi…"

She let go of him, nodding and fighting back all show of emotion. "I'll be waiting for you." And she stepped back.

Dumbledore shook Severus' hand, then opened the gate, through which Severus slipped out of. The gate slammed shut with a deep, loud bang. With a nod, he began walking, disappearing at a curve in the dirt path into the forest. Cassi was gripping the cold metal gate, watching him until she couldn't see him anymore. 

"Come along, my dear, you'll catch a cold, and I don't think Severus wants you sick," he said warmly, and he grasped her icy hand and lead her back to the castle. She complied silently, walking back in nearly a daze. She missed him already, and he had been gone all of five minutes. He brought her back to the Great Hall, but she broke away, saying she didn't feel well and was going to go back to her room and sleep. Dumbledore consented and bade her goodnight. With a light patter of her shoes, she stepped up the marble steps, stalked down the hallway, and eventually came to her room and locked herself in it. 

With a sigh, she looked around her room. It was lit with torches and with the moon's light pouring through the window. She muttered a spell and lit the room up more fully, then walked over to her desk, sitting down at it. Her impulse was to set her head down and cry, but she would not let herself, so she pulled out her scrolls and started converting them into future lesson plans. 

Within a few hours, she was deep into her notes, totally absorbed in her work in a desperate attempt to forget why she felt worried and sick. She wanted him back in her arms, safe in the walls of Hogwarts. Away from things that made his eyes flash with pain, because it killed her to see that look. Every time she thought something like this, she would just dip her quill into the inkpot and force her concentration onto her task at hand.

She found herself wondering how unhealthy it was to be using work as a distraction when she heard a small sound. Her head snapped up, looking around her room. Shaking her head at her own paranoia, she went back to her work. A few minutes later, another sound. And once again, there was no one in the room. This was unnerving, so she opened her drawer, dug under a stack of papers and found her small dagger underneath them. Just as she touched the cool metal of it's sheath, a hand clapped on her shoulder and she whirled around to see Simon standing next to her.

"Oh God Simon, you scared me half to death! Don't do that!" she gasped. For a moment relief had washed over her, but when she looked up at him again, she noticed that his eyes glittered strangely and her promise to Severus rung in her ears. She shrugged slightly to get his hand off her shoulder, but he gripped it tighter.

"Now see, that's just like you. I go through all this trouble to be a nice guy, and I still get shrugged off," he started, almost conversationally. He clapped both his hands to her shoulders roughly.

"Simon, you're starting to scare me. Leave," she said, tone hardening.

"I can't leave. I've got a job to do."

"And what would that be?"

Simon ignored her right then. He had lifted one of his hands off her shoulder and was pulling her hair away from her neck, examining it. "Interesting. A week ago you had marks all along your neck. I would have thought after today's stunt that you would have had a few more. Very peculiar. Yes Talin, I've known about you and Snape before even you knew about it. He was horribly suspicious of me from the off, and he's been in my way ever since. I could have had this job finished a month ago if he hadn't interfered."

"Do not think I will sit idly and listen to this," she said through gritted teeth, blood pounding in her ears.

"No no, you're much to fiery for that. I've seen so. I watched you when you killed my Acromantula."

"_Your_ Acromantula? What was the purpose of that?" Cassi's head was spinning and she felt a wave of panic clash with a wave of bravery.

"I was testing you. The Dark Lord is more than interested in you, little girl. You have powers and techniques that lead us to suspicion. I was supposed to be working as a spy, and here you come along and give a whole new purpose to my work."

She had heard enough. Within a second, she had picked up her dagger, unsheathed it, and had it his throat, standing eye level with him and twisted out of his grip. The blade sung with the vibrations of the unsheathing. "Give me a reason. I dare you," she growled. He looked at her with shocked eyes, then smiled, regaining his unnerving calm.

"You wouldn't kill me."

"No, I'm going to take you to Dumbledore. Now if you come alive is up to you. Give me trouble and I will." A tense second of silence passed between them. He grabbed at her hand and pushed it away, shoving her against the wall. The battle then ensued for the dagger, which she was trying to return to his throat. He reached up and choked her with his free hand, keeping her pinned against the wall.

"Look what it's come to. Tsk tsk. Drop the dagger. I'm supposed to bring you alive."

"Like hell you will!" she managed, and jerked her hand out of his and beat the hilt of the dagger against his head. He let go of her to grip his head slightly, and was immediately struck with another blow. Just as she had re-gripped it to use the blade end of it, he swung his hand around and hit her alongside the face, sending her flying to the ground, but she had grabbed his robes and pulled him down as well. Before she could attempt to sit up, he had sent the dagger skidding out of her reach and pinned her hands above her head, straddling her to keep her down.

"My, isn't this an awkward position?" he asked in a sickly sweet voice.

"Don't you even think about it!"

"And why not? Severus is dead anyway! We needed him out of the way for this, and he betrayed the Dark Lord, and everyone who does so must pay. Was this news to you? You didn't honestly think he'd get away with sneaking back into our numbers, did you? Oh, how cute. You did. _Adfectus torpesco_!" During his speech he had taken advantage of the fact that she had gone into shock so he had time enough to pull his wand from his belt and curse her.

Cassi suddenly felt very numb. It was the weirdest sensation, not pleasant at all, rather claustrophobic-like. She felt her mind was floating above her body, dimly watching her situation but unable to move fully without her reactions being lagged and somewhat incoherent. In a very distant part of her mind, she felt pressure on her lips, but she could not pull away, she had no energy to do so. Her mind was panicking, trying to move, to resist but ultimately failing. _I'm going to die. I will be his toy until he drags me off to Voldemort, who will kill me. I'm going to die. _From far away she felt a pain across her cheek, he had slapped her, yet she still lay there as if dead. He was yelling at her for something, but she refused to concentrate on his words. Suddenly, his words stopped. She opened her eyes slightly to see a very blurry Simon looking at something in another direction. Dumbly, she looked that way as well. Before she could make out what was shadowing her doorway, she felt herself being picked up and being held against her attacker with one arm, then a cool feeling on her neck. Slowly her senses told her that a knife blade was pressed to her neck, and she struggled to lift her hand to push it away, but grew weary and went limp in her attackers arms. Faintly, she heard voices arguing and concentrated hard to understand their words.

"Any closer and I'll kill her!" That was Simon, she was pretty sure. It was close to her.

"You couldn't kill her. If you bring back a dead body, the Dark Lord will end your life and you know it!" Who was this one? She liked this voice, and tried to lift her head, but she felt her energy waning, and her blurry world was beginning to blacken.

"But if I bring back _two_ dead bodies…"

"I'd like to see you try that. You had better put her down and undo the spell, she's going to black out if you keep her under it. I daresay he wouldn't like that either." The voice was firm and deep, but fading into the blackness…

She felt her body slump and hit the floor. Then a rush of senses came back to her, overwhelming her. As soon as she sat up with a rush of adrenaline, she saw Simon flying back into the wall, a green light throwing him there. The high pitched sound of her dagger hitting the ground in a clatter rung in her ears. She snatched for it and grabbed it up, but felt Simon tug on her robes, pulling her to him, his wand out and pointing at her. Without being able to give it a second thought, she plunged her knife into his side.

He gasped and pulled it out, startled at her. Time seemed to be suspended. "You will pay. You will…pay!" he finally muttered to her, and blood appeared at the corners of his mouth, then his lips. His bulging blue eyes stared into hers with a fierce anger. Finally, he passed out and went limp. Horrified, she scooted back from him, staring at her hands, then blacked out from shock and exhaustion. 

She woke herself up a few seconds later, shaking her head and clearing her vision. A person in black was kneeling next to the dead figure of Simon Harper. She strained her eyes and concentrated on the figure. "S-Severus?" she asked weakly. The figure snapped his head up and looked at her. It was him, and she wanted to throw herself at him, but something took over and she refrained and instead scrambled to stand up and back against the wall, far from him.

"What are you doing here? Simon, he said…" she asked, still keeping herself against the wall. She had just killed someone. Dead. Simon was dead.

Severus stood, abandoning the body. He tried to walk to her, but she scooted farther down the wall. "Cassandra Talin, what _are _you doing?" he asked quietly.

"I…you can't touch me. No! I killed him! What do you want with me?!" she asked, half hysterical. She covered her eyes with her hands, shaking visibly.

"Calm down, girl! He would have killed you if you hadn't killed him. It's survival of the quickest, dammit Cassi!" He grasped her wrists and gently pulled them down from her eyes, then sliding his hands up to gently grip her arms. "Look at me…look at me. I'm not going to hurt you. Alright? The spell hasn't completely worn off. Alright, I want you to sit right here. Do not move. Don't. I will be back in a few seconds; I have to send someone for Dumbledore." 

"Don't leave me," she whispered, but he was already out the door. She sat, curled up in a ball on the floor, collecting her thoughts as her mind cleared from the spell and the shock. Sensibility, reason, and logic all came back to her, calming her down and hardening her heart. Finally she looked up and glared at the dead body dripping blood on her floor. _Why did he do that? Was I fooled all along?_

True to his word, Severus was back in the room within a few seconds, looking out of breath and weary. He came and sat down next to her, and at that moment she realized he looked battered as well as he groaned slightly while sliding down next to her.

"Are you alright?" she asked him, sounding a lot calmer than she still felt.

"Yes yes, I'm fine-" He stopped when she picked up his hand and looked at it, a livid red slash across his palm. She looked at it painfully, then up at him, eyes searching his. "It was a trap… to lure me away from here. It was only two men though, it wasn't hard to escape. Look, I'm just fine! Gods, I'm the one who should be worried, he could have killed you!"

"But he didn't, did he? I killed him instead. I thought you were dead, the way he spoke…"

"I sent a note ahead saying that their plan had succeeded. And _I _am _no_ reason to give up, Cassi!" She gave him a sad sort of look that told him she would contradict him any day of the week, and he let it go, startled by her deep affections. He was about to say something, when Dumbledore ran into the room, breathless and looking angered. 

"Minerva just caught me… where is he?" he asked, and Severus pointed across the room at the corpse lying in a pool of crimson blood. Dumbledore looked fierce as he stood over the body, sneering slightly. He then confronted the two huddled against the wall, kneeling before them.

"Cassandra…can you tell me what happened?" he asked slowly, being very gentle with his words. She took a quick side-glance at Severus, who nodded slightly, and began until she stumbled in her words of when Severus had appeared in the doorway. Quickly, Severus took over the story from there, and Cassi listened to her own actions as if she didn't know the person. 

"Self-defense, right. Severus, you may want to take her out of here while I inform the Ministry and remove the body," he said in a clear voice. Severus nodded, but Cassi protested.

"I'm fine, I can handle being here with you two!" she tried to say, but she took Severus' hand to help her stand. "I swear, I'm fine."

"You shouldn't be here for this. Trust me," said Snape, and she sighed and left the room with him, walking down the dark corridors quietly. He led her back to his dungeons, torches flickering to life upon their entrance. Cassi sighed again, pausing after taking a few steps into the room, her back turned to him.

"Go help Dumbledore. I know you want to. Go on," she said gently. He looked at her hard.

"I do," he said with a grimace, "But I can't leave you here alone after what happened-"

"Snape! I'm fine!" she said angrily, turning to face him. "There are times when I think you underestimate me, I'm quite alright. Look, there's no one else who's going to come try to kidnap me while I'm in your dungeons. I'll be fine, you go, I'll wait." She crossed her arms, but was surprised when he softly placed a hand on her shoulder, melting her quick temper.

"Cassi, I do not underestimate you, but I… happen to understand your situation a little better than you think. If you think you can handle being alone, then yes, I will go. But first, I'm giving you something for this," said Snape, lifting one of her shaking hands. She looked at her own hand with bitter disgust for projecting her fear and weakness. In a stolen glance, he caught her expression and knew exactly what she was thinking. He wove his fingers through hers and kissed her hand. "Don't Cassi. You did what anyone would have done. The Dark side works in ways you will never know, betrayal and murder is a game to them, a game of chess. It's a thrill to them. You're not like them, and if you even begin to think so…" 

"I know, I know. It's just hard not to think that, so very hard. Especially when you're Marked." She sighed and let go of his hand, and he went to his cabinet and pulled out a short, round bottle of smoky red liquid.

"One swallow of this, and stay seated after taking it, if you don't mind. I don't need you collapsed on the ground again. Thank you, yes. And you're sure-" began Severus after taking back his little bottle of half-drunk potion, but was interrupted by her.

"Severus, I'm fine. I think I'm just going to sit here and think. I'll be right here when you get back, I swear," she said, and he nodded. He looked reluctant for a second, then stood and left. She stared after him for some time, until a pang of tiredness hit her and she sat down in a student's chair, leaning forward and laying her head on the table. Maybe she'd sleep for just a few minutes…

__

Cassi ran from the house, the dark of night shrouding her as she slipped into the forest. She wasn't sure why she was running, but she needed to escape, and this thought alone drove her into the heart of the forest.

Out of breath and way out of the house's range, she stopped under a patch of moonlight, panting. She moved her hand to push a strand of hair out of her eyes when she froze, hand bathed in the silver moonlight. The light shone down on blood soaked hands, dripping with the sin. She screamed at her hands.

Cassi awoke sharply, still sleeping in her arms at the student's desk. She unfolded her arms and sat up blearily, noticing Severus standing next to her, his hand on her shoulder and looking slightly alarmed.

"You scared me," she recovered quickly.

"I'm sorry, I just got back."

"What time is it?"

"About two in the morning."

"And I have to teach tomorrow with this amount of sleep? Wonderful." She straightened up and ran her fingers through her hair. He looked uncomfortable, and she surmised what he was going to say before he said it. "Dumbledore doesn't want me teaching tomorrow or for awhile, does he?"

"Not really. It would be too stressful. Then again, he doesn't want me teaching either, but I really don't think that will be happening…"

She swung her feet off the table, stood, and smiled at him. "Then I'll see you tomorrow morning. Goodnight." 

"Oh no you don't," he said, and he blocked her way to the door. "I think he's right. You really shouldn't teach tomorrow, not after what happened tonight."

"And you're allowed to teach because why? Your life was attempted just like mine was. If I stay out the rest of the week, then you will too." She crossed her arms and glared at him, tapping her foot.

He glared back, also crossing his arms. "You're still in my care, and I say you aren't teaching tomorrow."

"No."

"Yes."

"No-o."

"Yes."

She grabbed his collar, kissed him roughly, then let go. "It's cute that you care, but no. I'll see you in the morning." And she left the room, shutting the door behind her.

"Damn her," he said to the door. "And I am_ not_ cute."

~

Cassandra ran into the headmaster almost as soon as she had escaped the vicinity of the dungeons. After much persuasion and arguing, she was finally able to convince him that she did not need a break from her works, and that it would actually help if she did not dwell on it. He looked most reluctant to let her do this, and told her so.

"If your concentration on your work grows to an unhealthy level, I will be forced to _make _you take time off," he had said with concern.

"It won't, I promise," she replied gratefully.

"No doubt Severus will see to this anyway," Dumbledore said in an undertone, though he was smiling. However, she had heard him quite clearly.

"He is a workaholic himself, you know," she said, trying not to blush. _Please don't blush, please don't blush…_

"I do know that. But I also know he wouldn't let you dabble in his unhealthy habits," said Dumbledore, still smiling, and Cassi felt herself burn with blush. Dumbledore laughed, shook his head, then grew more serious. "And you're absolutely sure you can be comfortable teaching in you classroom?"

Cassi thought about this, rubbed her temple, and sighed. "It would be too confusing for the students to switch classrooms so late in the year. I'll be fine, unless… how much are you telling them?"

It was Dumbledore's turn to rub his temple and sigh. "They deserve to know what their teacher was and what happened to him. For security and practical purposes, your involvement will be left out. They won't know what happened in the classroom."

A moment of pensive silence fell upon the conversation. Finally, Cassi spoke. "Dumbledore…why? Why me? What happened…I didn't expect that from him. Severus warned me, but how did he know?" This all tumbled uncontrolled from her mouth, and for a moment she regretted her frivolity of her words, but then agreed it was for the best.

"I can't answer half of the those questions simply because I don't know. His identity is still a mystery to us, and we don't know his motive. It seems the Dark side has an interest in you…"

Cassi shook her head. "I don't know why either… maybe because of, well…" she cut off, rubbing her inner arm. Dumbledore nodded.

"We'll bring it up at the next meeting. Go try and rest… and I'm glad to you're still with us." He smiled one last time and patted her shoulder while she whispered her thanks.

Soon after, she walked into her classroom, looking cautiously around her room. Desks were in neat order, as were the books. In fact, everything looked just as it should, there was no evidence of what took place a few hours before. Absently, she walked to the spot were Simon's body should lie, but not even a stain marred the stone floor, though it smelt slightly of potion. Dropping to her knees, she reached out and touched the floor, then stared at her pale hands.

"Who ever you are, I'm sorry."

~

And the rest of the week passed like this. In the morning, the students gasped at the news of their Muggle Studies professor, angered and sickened by the deception. The only bright point of this was that the rumors of Severus and herself were pushed back in everyone's mind and were no longer the main subject of talk. This was a relief because Cassi did not know if she could deal with anything more than what she had already experienced. Classes were torture to teach, and every time she closed her eyes, it was Simon in a pool of blood that she saw. 

She found she could not sleep at night. One night, she just stared out her window pensively for awhile until she became sleepy, another night she graded papers, yet another she paced around her room until a very restless night came and she could not stay in the castle any longer. She slipped on her school robes and grabbed her cloak before slinking out of her room and out of the castle into the early February night air. 

She had come outside to think things through. Maybe she hoped that the cool night air would freeze her guilt, or that the moon's bright beams would soothe her soul. Her feet carried her to her rock on the edge of the forest, which she sunk down next to and leaned back against, staring up at the clear night sky. The stars twinkled innocently at her, winking and dancing in the black-blue velvety night sky. She sighed and stared up at them, envying them. They had not killed anyone, they did not have enemies or tangled lives… and they were always stars, they had been stars in their past, and they would remain stars in their future. She envied their steadiness.

Her ears perked to a light sound across the grass. Her senses were sharp since her attack, and no small sound went undetected. The noise came again, and she slipped her hand into her pocket, grasping her knife that she had pocketed before coming out here. The noise came to a halt, and her body tensed. Without warning, she sprung up and at a figure that stood near her, tumbling it to the ground. Before anything else could happen, she had the flat of the blade pressed against its throat.

"Severus!" she cried out as she recognized the figure. She withdrew her blade from his neck and placed it near the rock.

"Nice to see you too," he groaned, sitting up partially. "And nice to know you still carry that knife around everywhere, ready to finish me off at a moment's notice." 

"Sorry, I'm rather edgy. You would be too, you know." She was on his lap from springing at him, but was now sliding off of him and returning to her seat at her rock. He moved and sat closely next to her. "What are you doing out here?" she asked with a sigh.

"I…I couldn't sleep. I thought I would take a walk but found your tracks across the snow," he explained. "I take it you haven't been sleeping much either?" She shook her head. He let this pass in silence, staring up at the stars. A breeze ruffled the trees in the forest, and shook their branches. "You're thinking about him again, aren't you?" Her eyes turned to him when he asked this, searching his deep black eyes.

"Yes, I was… It's hard not to. I mean, I kil-"

"Cassandra, don't even-"

"Severus, how can I not?! A person is dead because of me!"

"You had to. There's no other way around it. Had you not, he would have taken you Voldemort, who is worse than death himself. And they would have done this without hesitation, Cassi. They don't care who they kill. They've even stopped counting how many they've killed, the numbers are too great to keep track of. The fact of the matter is that you had to do what you did," he said with great passion, ending his speech with a touch to her cheek. Cassi was so surprised at this that she did not argue, instead, she shocked Severus by leaning her head against his shoulder. Rarely did he talk of his Death Eater days, and she knew it was a subject he preferred to stay off of, so she took this quietly. Minutes passed where no words were spoken, but they knew everything that was being communicated. 

"How did you know he worked for the other side?" she asked him curiously.

"I have suspected him from the beginning of the year."

"You suspected me too, if you'll remember."

"…That's beside the point. Nothing seemed right with him, he called me into his office to talk about nothing at all. He was in the room when McGonagall was after me to go find you before the Acromantula attack… something was just off." He shook his head. "But I should have listened to you when you said it was a trap," he said after a long silence with self-disgust. "I endangered much more than myself…"

"You did not realize. And you truly did not have a choice; you were correct when you said that they would have killed you had you not gone. And how were you to know exactly what was going to happen with Harper? Do not feel sorry on my account. I'm still here, aren't I?" She tilted her head to look up at him.

__

Don't do that, you look so innocent when you do that. I feel like I'm blackening you just with my touch. "Yes you're still here, but sometimes it's not enough to just exist. Contentedness and happiness are sometimes more important." He sighed heavily.

"And who says I do not have contentedness and happiness? I find myself perfectly content, thank you kindly," she whispered, snuggling against him.

"I don't understand how you can derive so much pleasure from me at all," he said, shaking his head. "I told you that I wasn't very good for you-"

"And that you weren't what I wanted, I remember that. But I don't listen all that well, do I?" She smiled and he smiled back, then shifted her slightly so she was resting in his lap once again. "You couldn't have been more wrong. And you're not as evil and dark as you think you are."

"You'd be surprised."

"You're too hard on yourself. You're not who you used to be, you're not a Death Eater. You're a better person than you let on," she said in a whisper, stroking his neck softly with her fingertips. He had a slight weakness about his neck, and often shivered when she would hit a sensitive spot. "Cold?" she purred smugly on one such occasion.

"Damn you woman, smirking and smiling. Actually," he said, brushing stray strands of hair out of her face, grazing her skin, "You feel very cold. We should probably go inside, you're probably going to get sick already from lack of sleep and sitting the snow at night."

"Very funny. Yes, it's getting late…" She slipped off his lap reluctantly, grabbed her knife and stood, placing it in her pocket. He stood alongside her, and walked with her to the castle, both listening to the crunch of the snow beneath their feet. They snuck into the dark castle as quietly as possible, hoping someone would oil the door's old, creaky hinges one of these days.

When it came time for their paths to part, Snape decided to walk to her room, just in case. She grinned and shook her head (though she had actually intended to somehow make him come with her anyway- she was prolonging the inevitable, she knew, but even a few more minutes with him was worth it), walking with him up the stairs and down the black corridors. When they did in fact reach her classroom, she pulled him inside, just to be with him for a little while longer and shut the door behind him.

She was unfastening her cloak, pulling it off her shoulders, and hanging it on a peg behind her when she noticed Severus was leaning against her blackboard, watching her, dark eyes piercing her mind, shining out against pale skin. Cassi turned her eyes to her desk to conceal her slight blush. She busied herself with taking her knife out of her cloak pocket and placing it in the desk drawer when she and asked through a smile, "And just what are you looking at, Professor?"

"I was just… watching," he said nonchalantly, shrugging slightly. She shut the drawer slowly and walked over to him, placing her arms around his neck, which allowed him to encompass her in his arms. When she looked up at him, she found she was having a difficult time tearing her eyes off of his.

"So I see… well… goodnight," she said after a moment's silence, and she placed a kiss on his lips, able to shut her eyes with ease now. However, one short kiss led to another, slightly stronger one. Then that led to a longer, deeper kiss, and before either realized how swept away they were, she was backed against the hard stone wall, fingers trailing down his robes to come to his belt, which she began to undo without giving it a thought. He had already undone three buttons down her back, touching cool fingertips to her skin. Her heart was in her throat and her hands shook slightly.

"I want you," she managed when he had pulled back slightly to breathe.

"Thank God," was all he could say before she caught him up in another kiss. The next time he gasped for air, she was at his neck, working a sensitive area over with butterfly light kisses until he made a small noise in his throat like a restrained moan. At this point his kisses grew rougher and he pinned her against the wall, taking slight control of the situation. She grasped his hands off her body delicately and pulled him into her office and through the door there, making sure the doors were shut behind them and locked. The last door, the bedroom door, slammed shut, closed by a severely distracted Severus.

~

Hours passed. The room was dark save one candle, which weakly lit the room. Cassi serenely lay in bed watching the flickering candle flame wobble on the wick, her thoughts not really consumed with the flame but with the person beside her, who was stroking the back of her arm. She began to notice that his fingers tended to stray to one area on her shoulder, tracing a pattern there. Sighing, she knew what was bothering him and she turned onto her back to look up at Severus, who was lying on his side gazing down at her.

"It's a horrible scar, isn't it?" she whispered.

"Yes," he murmured. "You have them all down your back… curse scars, knife scars, burns… Death Eaters bear more scars than any normal person will know of."

"You have them too, down your shoulders, across your back…" She trailed off, hinting that it was more than body that was scarred. She shivered suddenly and pulled herself closer to him, and he re-adjusted himself so that she was in his arms with her head on his shoulder. She sighed contentedly.

He kissed her forehead softly and kept her close, taking in as many details as possible to convince himself that this was real. Blinking blue-violet eyes peered up at him, windows to the soul he felt his soul had just touched fingertips with. As he gently moved one hand to touch her lips, he wondered how long this unnatural good fortune would last, and if he would be robbed of it as he always has been. He tried not to think about it.

"God you're gorgeous," he whispered to her, finally able to voice that particular thought that had been invading his mind for months upon months. She blushed and looked away, secretly pleased.

"You sweet talk," she said finally, then grinned. "The day Severus Snape sweet talks is the day they invent self-spelling wands. The day Muggles and wizards live peacefully, the day-"

"The day the Potions professor finds himself in bed with the Defense teacher," added Snape with a smirk, and she laughed.

"Yes… not that the Potions professor is complaining, I see."

"No, not in the slightest. Quite the contrary."

Cassi laughed and closed her eyes sleepily. "I love you," she murmured before falling asleep in his arms. He petted her hair as she fell asleep, then kissed her softly and slept as well.

***

The sun burst into the room through the window, awakening Severus from his pleasant sleep. For a split second he forgot where he was, then remembered everything from last night. Quickly, he glanced next to him to find Cassi sleeping softly, not run off or even fabricated from some wonderfully realistic dream. She was still his, lying next to him in bed, the sun playing across her face. He resisted the urge to touch her cheek. His next order of business was to find his wand and do something to that window that dared to wake him up. 

He reached over, taking great care not to move too much so as to wake her up, and felt around on top of the nightstand where he had placed wand last night before she had relocated his robes. However, it was not there. The single drawer of the stand was slightly open though, and there was a very good chance that it had been knocked off the top of the stand and rolled into the drawer. Sure enough, his wand was in the front of the slightly opened drawer, so he pulled it out. Something was tangled on it though, and he pulled his wand closer to examine it.

A necklace had been tangled around the wand, so he slid it off into his palm. What he saw almost made him drop his wand and the necklace all at once. On a twisted silver chain was an amulet; an amulet of a detailed snake wrapped around a heart, little black beady eyes glaring up at him. He only knew of two necklaces like this; he owned one and the other had been given to someone he cared very deeply for a very long time ago… but here it was, the Snape family symbol resting in his palm.


	8. Of Glass Hearts

****

Author's Note: SHH! Yes, I know this took me forever, but I had school, and exams, and I got sick, and… I've got more excuses, but this is not a ramblefest.

This chapter is…. PG-13/R. It has both R moments, but the whole thing is not R. Let's see, we've got a bit of language, adult scenes, violence and rambles! The next one is R-ish too, but not in the same way…. Anyway, if I end up corrupting you and you get angry, don't come crying to me, because you can stop right here… Still here? Yay!

I don't own anyone except Cassi, the late Simon, and Anya. Everyone else belongs to JK Rowling, along with the setting. Also, I'm not making money from this, or I'd be broke.

One last thing; no wait, two: 1) FF.net is being a little shaky at the moment, so at the very end of this story I put this sign [*~*~*] and a little note. If you can't see the bottom of my chapter (because I can't see the bottom of my other chapters), then please wait to read it. Hard, I know, but it's better to get the full thing. And 2) REVIEW! You crazy readers, you must review! ;) I'm serious about that hostage thing…. It could happen O.o REVIEW! I neeeeed to know what you thought, and what you think will happen next (which won't affect the outcome so don't worry, I just like hearing it to see what impression I sent), and if you liked it. Ok, I'm shushing now, go read.

Oh yeah, translations…

__

Privet- Hello

__

Vy ochen' krasivy- You are very pretty

Ok, now go read.

Chapter 8: Of Glass Hearts 

Severus stared at his palm for sometime. Strewn delicately across his hand was a thin silver necklace, and on the chain was an all too familiar amulet of fine craftsmanship- his own family symbol. Only two existed, one was locked away in a box in his room, and now the other… the other had been found in the nightstand drawer of his lover's room. He thought the other one had been lost, disappeared with its owner. The other one belonged to a dead girl…

Startled, he dropped the necklace back into the drawer and out of sight, shutting it gently. He then took his wand and, pointing it at the window, whispered a simple spell which darkened the glass, turning the room from sunny to dimly lit in a few seconds. But it was at this moment, however, that the individual next to him stirred slightly and opened her eyes, looking pleased.

"You stayed," she whispered to him softly, reaching up and pushing the black hair that fell against his cheek away from his face and behind his ear. She propped herself up with her elbow and teased his lips with hers. Almost immediately he began to feel guilty, as if not knowing what this new revelation meant would violate her personal rights._ There could be a million reasons why she has it. For all you know, it could be a fake, an imitation, a coincidence. You know exactly who this touch belongs to. It's not… because she's dead… exactly. _But somehow this wasn't enough for him, and yet he managed to push it back in his mind, convincing himself that it wasn't worth worrying over at this moment. No, he was more concerned with feathery kisses that were being administered lovingly to his neck and shoulders. 

"I was worried you'd leave," she whispered to him. She was tempting him again with her impossibly light kisses, and his worries were becoming distant with each one. He could only take so much of this before he had to pressing his lips firmly against hers, quickly pulling a moan from her throat.

"I wouldn't have left… you threw my clothes too far across the room for that," he replied simply, and he felt her smile.

"And of course the Summoning Spell never came to mind to fix that small dilemma if you did want to leave so badly."

"Saucy this morning, aren't we?" His kisses were growing fiercer and she shivered.

"Maybe, we'll have to see. I guess we're skipping breakfast, aren't we?" she asked with a smirk, allowing him to ease her back onto the bed.

"Congratulations, you guessed correctly," he replied smirking back before capturing her mouth in passionate kiss.

"I love it when I'm right."

~

He touched her cheek softly, then kissed her forehead. Both were standing in her classroom now, dressed and finally out of bed. 

"I'll be in my dungeons," he said. "I have some things to sort out."

Cassi knew he liked to spend his weekends in his dungeons, shut up with some book or potion, just existing in silence. She nodded and stepped back from him.

"I'll come visit Hell Frozen Over if I have the desperate desire to become a human icicle," she said with a sigh. He just shook his head and tried to suppress a smile. 

That's when it hit him like lightening from the sky: She made him happy. Unexplainably happy. And it frightened him. He enjoyed her company more than he had anyone else's in a very, very long time, and it occurred to him at that time that he might not only be _in _love with her, but also actually love her, a very scary thought indeed. It had always seemed to work out that he lost everyone he had ever loved, so he protected himself and everyone else by never becoming attached to anyone. Always had he looked down upon those captured in love's snarling net, but now that he found himself trapped beneath it… was it really so bad? One part of him mind shrieked that it was; this was the part that had always helped him through rough times. However, no other part of his mind was really listening to that little voice, because a very large part of him wanted to continue on with this, to see where he ended up. He had found his whole world turned around by one single being, and he had no objections to this sudden reversal of sky and land.

__

One single being, thought his mind darkly, _who has YOUR family symbol in her drawer._

***

Time passed slowly that day for Severus as he agonized in his dungeons. To keep himself busy, he was powdering a store of things he had neglected for some time. He sat at his desk, a collection of bottled scattered about him, pouring miniscule glassy beads into the mortar, then grinding them finely with his stone pestle. It was a rather mindless act, so his thoughts tended to wander from his task that his hands had seemed to take over.

__

What did this mean? Severus tried to run over facts and scenarios in his mind to make sense of this startling revelation. There had been two pendants in his family, passed down for several years now. He had been given both just before his mother had died, and had kept them for several years. Then, when he was 21, he gave one to a girl whose face he had never seen.

__

The forest was dark with only a few stray weak moonbeams shining through the canopy. Severus stood before a dark cloaked figure that had her head bowed.

"Anya, come with me," he had begged her. "You don't have to do this anymore, we don't have to stay. Come back to the Light side with me."

"You know very well that Master will seek us out and kill us both," she replied quietly. "I can't change sides, it's too late for that. It would jeopardize your side."

"No one would suspect us. My family has been Dark too long for anyone to suspect me, and you..."

"I'm His pet, yes I know. It's all the more reason I shouldn't leave. Your leader, Dumbledore, he would not appreciate a converted assassin and toy of his archenemy on his side. Severus, I think He suspects us," she said in a defeated manner.

"Don't refer to yourself like that."

"There are more vulgar things I could use, if you so prefer."

"No, I do not prefer. Look what he's done to you! I want you to at least consider this, and I'll talk to Dumbledore. Please promise me at least that much."

"I promise," she said after a moment of silence. "Close your eyes. I trust you to keep them shut."

He shut his eyes and felt a sudden cold wind blow against his hair, letting him know that his hood had been let down. A second later, warm lips pressed against his softly and he reached up to discover her nearly shoulder length hair was exposed, meaning her hood was down as well. So rarely could they share moments like this that it always shocked him when it was actually happening. It felt so surreal that he never wanted to let her go. 

She withdrew from him quickly and pulled her hood up, face hidden by the spell-induced shadows immediately. He pulled his hood up as well, then pulled something out of his pocket and pressed it into her hand. "I want you to have this, and remember what you promised me."

She opened her hand and looked down at it, then with shaking hands, placed the necklace around her neck then laced her fingers through his. She was about to say something when she jerked out of his hands and drew her wand.

"Someone's coming, go on," she said, tone now hardened and experienced, far beyond her years. He backed up a step and Apparated.

Severus shook his head hard, trying to dispense with this memory. She had died a week after that happened. Died because of him.

Or had she? With the discovery of the pendant, there was a possibility… no. Though the resemblance in stance and garb had made him wonder if it was her the very first time he had met her, it could not be. Simply because… because… it was just too strange. The amulet must have been an imitation (though why would they want to imitate it?), or perhaps a coincidence (though the details were too fine to recreate). He hated how he had a counter-situation for everything.

Logically, he really had only one solution, and that was to talk to Dumbledore. At this thought, he stood out of his chair and began to pace restlessly in front of his room, long strides causing his robes to flutter slightly behind him. He did not want to speak with anyone about this, not at all. First of all, it meant reliving something that was still quite painful for him. It also meant admitting he was in her quarters, which is something he would rather keep to himself. And thirdly, it could mean losing her all over again, and much pain and anguish for her.

At that moment, there was a light tap at his door. He called for the person to enter, and Cassi peered in.

"Sorry to bother you, but I wanted to ask you something for lessons," she said quietly, watching him stop pacing, so mesmerized in thought. His slight panic died in his heart at her humbleness, and he silently berated himself for thinking she could somehow read his mind and know what he was thinking. She walked to him slowly, trying to read him, but handing him the book as if she hadn't noticed his odd behavior.

"Is this a mistake in the book?" she asked, pointing out a paragraph on a type of defense spell. 

He looked over it and nodded. "Yes, this particular spell is not capable of injuring the attacker. However," he said, and he flipped forward into the book about a hundred pages or so, "this one is."

Cassi skimmed over the page he had turned to. "Perfect, thank you," she said happily, and stood on her tiptoes to kiss his cheekbone while slipping the book out of his hand. It only took her two steps away from him to sense that something was off again and to turn around to look at him hard.

"Yes?" he asked, falsely sounding bored, hands behind his back, ready to resume pacing as soon as she left.

She tilted her head and continued to examine his face. "Are you alright?" she inquired.

"Yes yes, I'm perfectly fine, why?"

"Well, I could have sworn…" she started to say, but then stopped and shrugged slightly, still looking very troubled. Somewhat cautiously, Severus placed both his hands on her shoulders, his turn to examine her hard. Hopeless as it was, he searched her face, looking for something, but found nothing. The expression on his face was saddening her; his eyes were dark and set, looking for something in her own, smooth pale face twisted with concentration, and mouth set in a firm line. She straightened up and kissed him gently.

It was like a slap in the face to be kissed like that, because now he knew beyond a doubt that Cassi and Anya were both one and the same. It was the same type of kiss, meek as if expecting to be slapped across the face for such daring. Questions welled up inside of him, but he didn't have the courage to voice a single one of them, for he knew it would break her to share his knowledge. 

"Don't worry so much," he whispered to her. Both heard the door of his classroom open and snapped apart, smoothing their robes and looking as if nothing had happened. It was Dumbledore that stood in the doorway, looking somewhat amused at their quick reflexes.

"Ah, I'm glad I found you both," he said, mercifully ignoring what he had encountered upon his entrance. "In light of what happened last week, we're moving the defense meeting to tonight to discuss Harper. I have a few people looking up things for me, and we'll all report back together tonight at 11. I expect I'll see you both there?"

"Indeed," said Cassi, casting her eyes to the floor. She then nodded once to Severus and left, head bowed in thought and her book enclosed in her arms. As soon as the door clicked shut, Snape turned his attention to Dumbledore. Dumbledore smiled at Severus, and he read his expression very well, which seemed to say '_she likes you very much, my boy_'.

"Dumbledore, I believe I have something I need to discuss with you. Tonight though, after the meeting," said Severus finally, visibly tense. Dumbledore gave him a piercing glance.

"And the matter we're to speak of is… Professor Talin?" asked Dumbledore, and Severus nodded pensively, momentarily covering his eyes with his hand. "Then I shall see you after the meeting." With one more mind-reading glance, he left the room and Severus collapsed back in his chair, left alone to torture himself further.

Hours ticked away. Severus had long since finished grinding everything into fine powders and was now lying pensively on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He had agonized himself through every point, matching up behaviors and habits, trying to find the holes in his theory, but only managing to seal his suspicions tighter. 

If this was indeed the truth, then he wondered if he should tell her. _ Of course you'll tell her, she has every right to know. Furthermore, she needs to know why every Dark instance has happened to her this year. I wonder how much the other side knows…_

Snape ran a hand through his hair. This whole situation was too much for him, it really was. It took him over a year after coming back to the Light side and after her death to finally pick up the broken shards of his life and try to make something of them. He had started at Hogwarts a little before the Dark Lord fell, staying stoically silent on the topic of his past, only rarely discussing it when forced to at point blank with Dumbledore. It was only Dumbledore that knew his full story. Even when speaking with Cassi briefly on the subject here and there he had been most vague.

He wished he had somehow coaxed her down to his dungeons last night. Then he would have never found that infernal necklace and be put through this hell on earth experience. Somehow he didn't think he could have gotten her to come down here though, and he obviously wasn't even thinking about that as soon as her lips touched his. Would he have taken it back to undo what he knew now? He didn't think he would; in fact, he would not have traded that night for anything. 

He rolled off his bed and went to splash his face with cold water, then commenced pacing his floor, skipping dinner entirely to stay locked up in his room until the meeting.

~

Cassi graded quizzes with full concentration, trying desperately not to worry so much about Snape. He looked so lost and so hurt when she had seen him last that it had in turn hurt her. She felt connected to him somehow, as if there was an invisible bond between them and everything one felt the other shared. Very badly did she want to comfort him, but she knew he would never allow it, which in turn frustrated her. He hadn't even come to dinner.

When she looked up at her clock finally she wanted to scream and shut herself up in her room. It was in fact time for her to leave, and the last thing she really wanted to do was to be in a meeting talking about someone who had betrayed her (and she in turn had killed him, something she had still not recovered from). This time could very well be used to try to coax something out of Severus, if he would talk to her still.

Grumbling, she stacked her quizzes and pushed them aside, then left the room, locking the door behind her. She proceeded down the dark corridors, weaving expertly around now and coming to his office in very little time. With a deep breath, she pushed the heavy door open to find the room empty save Sirius Black, sitting darkly in a chair close to the corner.

"Privet," she said to him in clear Russian, and his head snapped up from his deep thoughts. With a sly grin, he beckoned her to come sit down next to him.

"Vy ochen' krasivy," he said, still grinning. She punched him lightly on the arm and smiled. Sirius, pretending to be offended, looked at her with sad blue eyes, offset by his shoulder length raven black hair. _"Oh, it's well I suppose that Severus is neither here nor can he understand Russian. I do believe I would have been strung alive for that last statement." _He grinned again.

"What makes you say that?" she asked, eyes not exactly meeting his. Sirius merely tapped the place where his shoulder meets his neck, and she clapped a hand over her corresponding place, knowing quite well that there was a deep reddish mark still left there from last night. He laughed, a deep echoing sound, yet pleasant sounding.

__

"I told you I was right. I told you on the note I sent with Remus, who said you were 'undressing Severus with your eyes'. I told you." He took an almost child-like interest in her situation, watching her blush and laughing all the more. _"So, Slimy Snape has a girlfriend, how fun! And to think that you did not get along well with him, the irony is laughable. But it is a most tragic loss for myself; you aren't leaving me with many more people to flirt with. And to lose one of my favorites to him, it's **most** shameful. 'We fight more than anyone I know!' you had said. I don't think I want to know what you both fight about now, not with the end result being marks like th-"_

"Sirius Black! Silence yourself!" she said, blushing wildly and covering his mouth with her hand, feeling his smirk beneath her hand. It was (unfortunately) in this position that Snape caught her in when he walked in the room. She withdrew her hand quickly, gave Sirius an exasperated look, and was about to say something when he sat down next to her silently, but found nothing to say.

Severus was sitting rather blankly, not showing any emotions at all, save a rather curious one when he had first walked into the room. Now he was just staring ahead of himself as if in deep thought, and Cassi dared not to interrupt him.

__

"What's that git's problem?" asked Sirius, but Cassi shook her head and shrugged. Dumbledore walked into the room as soon as her shoulders were raised, though, so the conversation was dropped immediately. Several people filed in after him and found their seats around the table. Cassi stole a side-glance at Severus, who was now transfixed in the table, a stone cold look on his face as if his dark features were chiseled out of rock. She resisted the impulse to reach out and touch his hands, which lay folded on the table, so instead she cast her eyes down to the table as well, for a headache was now forming in her right temple.

"Is everyone settled?" asked Dumbledore, standing authoritatively in front of his chair. "Good. I called you in early this month due to a severe increase in Dark activity lately. As most of you know, there was an attempt in the castle on Professor Talin by our Muggle Studies professor, Simon Harper and another attempt on Professor Snape outside the castle but in the same night. There have also been a few stories in the Muggle newspapers that you shall find interesting, but we'll deal with that at the end." Dumbledore let these words soak in slightly, then he continued on in a powerful aire. "I asked our fellow member Ither Hall if he would look up Simon Harper for me. Did you find anything?"

A tall, lanky man with gray hair stood up to address everyone at the table. "I found no one by the name of Simon Harper. I did however, find an interesting history with a suspected Death Eater named Simon Donavan. The report for him was made when he became the prime suspect in the murder of his entire family. It had come to our sources that killing one's family was a way of initiation into the Circle." The man looked disgusted very suddenly. Cassi stood.

"Then we might as well confirm that Simon Donovan is Simon Harper, and that both and one are deceased. He once told me that his family never moved or went anywhere, which I can assume is some twisted way of saying that they are all dead. Were they from Wales?" she asked, and the man nodded. "That's him then." She took her seat, looking icily resolute. 

Dumbledore nodded. "That can safely be concluded then. Then what else did we know of Simon Donavan?" At this point, Dumbledore finally sat down, looking tired. The other man remained standing.

"Well, he was born in Britain, joined the ranks of You Know Who two years ago. He has never held a job that we can trace… so basically he was just a minion, I don't think we're looking at an Inner Circle fellow," said the man. "We also ran files on the two men that had a go at you," he said, now looking at Severus, "and found that they were nothing but minions as well, nothing notable."

"I guessed as much, I didn't recognize either of them, nor did they know much of me," he said rather quietly. Cassi began to run her temple, as it was throbbing in pain.

A little man on the other side of the table stood. "And the attacks begin… we're the last active force against the Dark Lord. Perhaps we should appeal to the Ministry for help, our numbers are too low to take on everyone if the Dark side has people to spare like this." This immediately sent five other people flying out of their seats, arguing with each other loudly.

"The Ministry is no help!"

"We'll use them for numbers and money, we don't have to include them!"

"They'll ruin everything, they can't keep a secret!"

"I wouldn't trust Fudge with a thimble, much less the entire wizarding world's fate!"

As the arguing commenced to a very loud squabble, Cassi saw her vision begin to blur out and a light-headed sensation took over. She was forced to set her head on the table, and her mind went slack for a moment. 

She felt a hand on both shoulders and the room quiet down as Dumbledore said quickly, "Severus, please take her outside, to the nurse if she needs it." She perceived that both Sirius and Severus were helping her stand, and she struggled slightly away from them when she got to her feet, walking herself out of the room with Severus behind her. When the door shut, she continued to walk away from it until she was mid-hallway and out of earshot, where she staggered and dropped to her knees. Severus knelt on one knee in front of her, hand on her shoulder.

"Cassi, what-" he began to ask, but she quieted him by holding up her hand, her head bowed. In a few seconds she looked back up at him, paler than ever and shaking slightly. She tried to stand up but Severus gently pushed her back down.

"Would you mind telling me what happened?" he asked, looking concerned.

"I'd prefer not to," she replied.

"I'm afraid that answer will not suffice."

"You know, you really are a nosy git sometimes."

"Thank you, now please continue."

She remained motionless, staring off to the side in a dark, depressed sort of way, eyes flashing with pain. "I remembered something," she said finally.

"Something from your Death Eater days," he said, fairly sure he had guessed this correctly. She nodded and stated again that she didn't want to talk about this, but he wouldn't let her leave until she told him what it was.

"Blood. Blood and the most horrible sense of shame imaginable… laying on the ground and bleeding," she spat bitterly after a silence. She turned her head from Snape and stood. "I'm going back to the meeting, I assume you're coming."

"Yes, I am," he said, but he grasped her wrist before she could walk off. "Cassi, do you honestly think I judge you for these sort of things? You forget that I was a Death Eater as well. Don't fear me so much."

"Your words mean well now, but your actions to me have been like ice. What happened this morning that made you change your mind about me?" She still wouldn't look at him as she spoke bitterly, borderline defeat edging into her voice. She had endured his weird behavior since this morning and couldn't take it much longer. One second he was soft and warm, the other he was cold and heartless, acting as if she didn't exist.

"Nothing Cassi, because I haven't changed my mind at all," he said, still sounding concerned. She sighed and, after giving him a critical look to see if he was lying, hugged him.

"You blow as fickle as the wind. There are times when you make very little sense for a man of such supposed high intellect," she whispered to him, and he kissed the top of her head.

"I find it amusing to confuse the inferior," he whispered back, and she laughed and pushed his shoulder, then walked back to the meeting, apologizing and saying she had just gotten a bit lightheaded and dizzy. She got quite a few concerned looks from her fellow members, but she ignored them. The rest of the meeting went smoothly enough, because everyone was acting as if she was fragile, which was even more irritating. By the end, Cassi was both annoyed and hurt, so she said her good-byes as soon as the meeting was over and left.

Severus watched her go wistfully, then waited silently in his chair for the people in the room to clear out. When the last one was gone, Dumbledore asked Severus to move to a chair in front of his desk, which he did. Dumbledore himself settled in his chair behind his desk and gave Severus a quizzical look.

"You wished to discuss something about Talin?" he asked after awhile. "Something which has been bothering you for awhile."

Severus blinked and nodded, very suddenly feeling that he did not want to do this anymore, and that he would rather pretend nothing was wrong at all. He found it curious that the headmaster had known that this had been quietly wreaking havoc in a suppressed corner of his mind. _Never misses a trick_ was the saying that came to mind when thinking of Dumbledore; he seemed to always know was going on, even if he did not indicate his knowledge. 

Even though he had been devising a way to state his situation all morning, it occurred to him that he still had no idea how to express his concerns without sounding dramatic. Therefore, he resorted to his polished skill of bluntness. Without a word, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the metal emblem of his family and placed it on the headmaster's desk with a light _tink. _Dumbledore picked up the pendant and examined it for a moment, letting it twirl loosely on its short ribbon before his eyes.

"Ah. If I'm not much mistaken, this is the crest of the Snape family," he said, not taking his eyes off the pendent. "It has very fine detail." He sounded almost as if he was appraising it. 

"Yes indeed. Detail so fine that it makes it hard to duplicate. I found the other one in Cassi's quarters." He averted his dark, brooding eyes to Dumbledore's desk now. A long silence followed, which was broken by a volley of questions.

"This exact replica?" You are certain? Did she say the pendant was hers or where she got it?" Dumbledore asked, in a quiet yet firm voice. 

"Yes, the exact replica, the details are too fine to recreate, but… she does not know that I've seen her pendent." At this point, Severus turned his eyes back to Dumbledore's, both seeming distressfully thoughtful.

"Severus," started Dumbledore gently, "if I remember correctly, you gave the other to a female Death Eater who was killed shortly thereafter… if you're insinuating that Cassi is her… then how might she have survived? Are you sure this is not wishful thinking?"

"When has wishful thinking ever disturbed me this much and why would I wish these sort of things upon Cassi? I never insinuated anything at all, all I said was-"

"Your whole demeanor says that's what you believe! There is more evidence that you're withholding from me, connections you have yet to tell me that have brought you to this conclusion."

Severus remained silent. Everything in his mind whirred like a thousand wheels spinning at high speeds, spinning out of control. The Mark, the scars, her story of being found in the forest, her accent, the memory, the very way she conducted herself, it all seemed to scream at him that she was Anya. Even his own dreams, which he had written off as silly insecurities, had tried to tell him this fact. Severus closed his eyes and, taking a deep breath, stated his cold evidence clearly, never stumbling or becoming flustered, finally smothering the small voiced emotions that burned in his heart. Dumbledore listened wordlessly, then nodded in resignation.

"That's fairly conclusive then," he said. "The problem becomes whether or not she wants to know. Anya the Assassin was one of the most feared Death Eaters, and also one of the most proclaimed. We know the names of very few followers. And from what you told me several years ago, there are several things she nor anyone else would want to remember…"

"Yes, yes I know. But if she's remembering things, eventually she will know. She's been gaining memories, there will be more… and one day, she will remember me and know that I've been keeping her identity a secret from her," he said with a sigh.

"Then you don't have a choice. I was hoping you would come to that conclusion on your own. There's also the factor that if Voldemort truly knows she is here at Hogwarts, she needs to know why her life is being attempted. I think you should tell her, and preferably soon."

"She's not going to react well to this…" sighed Severus.

"No, no she isn't, but she has to know. She deserves to know," said Dumbledore. "I still stand by my appointment of her. She's an able teacher, as well as a clever person, well suited for the role of teacher. Don't let her believe anything outside of that."

"I will not."

"Severus… how do you feel about this?" Dumbledore asked inquisitively.

"I?" asked Severus, caught off his guard. Quite suddenly, he felt like he was in his seventh year, being interrogated as to why he had cursed Black yet again. Worried, concerned, anxious, amazed, disbelief, denial, pained… all these words fell short of his true emotions. He answered with silence. Conveying his feelings with words was something he had never been good at, but Dumbledore read the silence and knew. Both understood that this was the end of the interview, and Severus thanked Dumbledore and left his office, his mind ablaze with thoughts.

***

The next week passed fretfully fast. Severus knew what he had to do, but doing it was a different story. He couldn't bring himself to do it, he couldn't inflict that sort of pain on her, but at the same token, he felt horribly guilty touching her as if he was taking advantage of her. He knew she was sensing all this and becoming frustrated with him, but there was nothing to be done.

It was on the following Thursday that things began to cave in. Cassi had tried to carry a normal conversation with him in the staff room during break, but he seemed distracted. After five minutes of forced talking, she stood up and left. Severus growled and stared back into the fire, orange flames flickering gaily behind the grate. Great, now his inner thoughts were soaking into his outer character and outraging the wrong people. This just set his bad mood for the day.

He didn't see her much during that day. He glimpsed her once in the hallway and saw her at lunch and dinner. Her mood seemed to soften from ignoring him angrily to silently pensive as the day wore on, but he wouldn't press his luck with trying to talk to her until tomorrow. When he had finished with his dinner, he stood without a word to her and left. 

Down he went into his dungeons, walking the cold, lonely, yet familiar steps while deep in thought. It had become an all-consuming thought; how to word it, how to break it to her, when, how she would react. Each scenario was played over and over in his head, and none of the reactions were good. In frustration, he slammed a book back into its place in his bookshelf and picked out another one, then stomped over to his desk and began taking notes from it. He worked like this for some time, listening only to the scratching of his quill across the page, filling scrolls with his neat and tidy handwriting

Just when he dipped his quill into the inkpot, he heard his door open and shut quietly. He didn't need to look up to know who it was; with her light step and familiar sound of her soft soled shoes, he knew it was Cassi. He flicked his eyes up to make sure he was right, and caught a most disturbing look on her face as she walked carefully over to him. Her face was totally blank, minus her violet-blue eyes, which glowed with hurt and frustration. Letting go of his quill, he prepared for a verbal lashing but was caught off his guard when both her hands arrested his shoulders and pushed him back in his chair. She then sat straddled on his lap and clapped her hands over his wrists on the arms of the chair, making it very difficult for him to move.

"I've got you now, Severus Snape. You can no longer hide, ignore me, skirt me in the halls, make weak conversation, or pretend like you're busy with something else," she hissed, "Tell me what's troubling you right now." She waited expectantly, eyes flashing and hair swept over one shoulder, a few strands falling in her eyes.

"Cassandra, what are you talking about?" he said, sounding surprisingly stern.

"You, sir, are pathetic at lying. You've been hiding something from me for a week and it's changed you. You won't even look at me for long anymore… if I've done something, then just tell me before it kills me," she said, her voice quavering slightly as the last few words tumbled out in despair.

"You haven't done anything," he said reassuringly, though still sounding coarse. "You worry yourself too much."

"I have good reason to this time, you won't even talk to me normally! Forgive me if I seem a bit disturbed," she retorted dryly. "Talk."

"Cassi, I really don't think-"

"Cut with the excuses."

"Cassandra-"

"Se-" she started angrily, but every negative emotion was swept away with the taste of his mouth, which she had not noticed had been inching closer to her own. It became acutely obvious exactly how provocative her position was when he groaned loudly and laid his hands on her thighs. She touched one hand to his face, while the other gently slid to the back of his neck, inching closer to him until her hips pressed into his, sending both minds reeling from electric shock. Both enjoyed the moment with mounting pleasure until he suddenly wretched away, breathless.

"No, I really can't do this to you," he gasped quietly.

"This is exactly what I'm talking about! Tell me what's going on or I'll leave, and I don't mean out the door," she said, voice dropping to a whisper. He seemed to study her face for awhile, and, with her threat of their relationship still hanging sourly in the air, he nodded.

"Alright, alright. But not here, not like this," he said, defeated. She slid off of him and stood back to let him stand, which he did almost begrudgingly. He then motioned for her to follow him, and he led her into his office, through a door, down a dimly lit passageway and into his room. She shut the door behind her and scanned his room over.

"Heads of Houses get bigger rooms," he answered for her, back to her.

"So I gather," she said, watching him pull a chair from his desk around to his bed and then, taking her by the hand, led her to sit on the edge of the bed while he sat on the chair, facing her.

"Cassandra, I know you have something, something that looks like this," he said, grasping her hand again and pressing his metal pendant into her hand, which he had picked up off the desk. She looked down at it in mild shock.

"Where did you get this?" she breathed, staring down at it.

"It's my family crest, I own one and you have the other." Silence.

"Your, your family crest? But then why do I have one (which I would like to add I've had since before I can remember)?"

"Because I…" He teetered. This was it. With this sentence, he would have to let her know his involvement in her past, and her own painful history. " I gave it to you before I can remember."

Cassi swallowed back a choke. "…W-what? Please explain."

~

__

Severus was eighteen when he joined the Dark side, but not for the reasons everyone assumed. Most thought he joined to avenge the death of his father, who died when he was 13 while out on mission for Lord Voldemort. But this was not true, for Severus did not care one way or the other for his father; he was in this for the power the job gave him, maybe even for the sense of belonging he had never felt before. Whatever his motive, he had climbed through the ranks of the Death Eater Order quickly in just three years, and his opinion was respected. 

Just after he turned twenty-one and had set up camp in the heart of a large forest, he found himself being called to a council meeting to discuss a person who had come to them looking to join.

When Severus entered the tent and found himself in the familiar large, dark meeting room, he immediately noticed the figure which stood facing the tables filled with prestigious Death Eaters, the Dark Lord being the center. It was heavily cloaked with its hood up, and only ghostly white fingers were visible at the ends of the sleeves. There was something ominous about it, but he took his chair facing the person, though could not actually see the face, making him more suspicious.

"As I was saying, I've come before you to ask acceptance into your Order," said the person in a distinctly female voice, laden down with a thick Russian accent.

"How can we be sure you do not work for Dumbledore?" asked Voldemort abruptly.

"Whom? You mean the man I read about in the papers now? He has no connections with Russia, and I've traveled across this continent looking for this group. I've never met the man." Voldemort nodded, accepting this answer for the time being. 

"How old are you?" asked Severus, his voice resonating slightly in the cold, stone room, leaning back in the chair and crossing his arms.

"I just turned eighteen," she replied with an icy tone.

"You're a bit young."

"What does age matter when I can do the jobs you require of me?" she responded quickly.

"Do you have any history of this sort of thing?"

"I'm good with a knife and wand, but if you mean to ask if I've killed anyone, then your answer is no. However, I'm sure in this company that will change."

"So you wish to be an assassin?" said Voldemort in his cruel, high pitched voice. "This does work out, for we are short… I've seen your knifework and it's quite impressive, but we'll need to test you…"

"My Lord, she is but a child with no experience, how can she be an assassin? We do not even know where her loyalties lie…" commented another member of the council.

"I shall test her, I said. Now, girl, take down your hood and come with me, I have an assignment for you," said Voldemort, now rising.

"With all due respect, sir, I'd rather keep my hood up and my identity to myself. I will, of course, share these things with only you, but only when I am certain I have the job," she said, tone cool.

"Why?"

"I have people looking for me that I'd rather not run into. It's easier this way."

"Indeed, well, come along… what do you call yourself?" he asked with a dark, sly smile.

"Anya."

"Come along Anya."

***

She had passed her test with great ease and was initiated after Voldemort determined she could be trusted. He seemed to take a special interest in her, for she showed devout loyalty and a special ability to complete her tasks quick and efficiently, while still leaving people with that uneasy fear that they could be next. Her popularity grew in the wizarding world, and soon newspapers were littered with stories about a faceless killer who horrifically murdered people in their sleep. After a few weeks, the newspapers obtained the name Anya when she left it on a slip of parchment at the scene of one of her slayings, just to put a name to their fear.

While she may have been a well-known murderess among the rest of the wizarding world, she was rarely seen in the Inner Circle unless Voldemort was present. Most knew that she was a busy girl with many missions, but it went unsaid that their master was keeping her for his own. Severus noticed that the Dark Lord would make comments about her that seemed a little warmer than his cold appraisals of his other members, and looked upon her with curiosity and amusement of a fearful sort. After a few months, it became a certainty to the Death Eaters.

All the while, Severus had forgotten about the girl and had continued on with his job. He created crucial potions for torture and also helped when the groups would go out to wreak terror on the world. However, after some meetings had passed, he had begun to wonder about the girl that everyone called Anya the Assassin. At one meeting, he managed to catch her eye, for she seemed to face him for some seconds, and at the next, he said hello to her. She spoke quietly at the meetings when she did speak, though her voice held ice. However, when she had returned his hello, it seemed a bit warmer. He thought that if he could make her voice warmer like that more often, life might not be so bad. They both kept peeking up at each other from across the circle during the rest of the meeting when they were supposed to be bowed at Voldemort's feet. 

However, as weeks passed, she seemed to disappear. He would hear talk of her latest killing, but he never saw her around the camps. She had just vanished, until Fate took its toll.

One night, in the warmth of the summer nights and as Severus was walking back from his dinner to go home, he decided to take the long way, as he enjoyed the quiet of the forest. With only the moonlight to guide him, he walked around, thinking about life. Within twenty minutes of walking though, he tripped and fell onto the ground. Cursing his clumsiness, he looked to see what had tripped him, but found it to be a person lying on the ground, shoulders shaking.

"Are you alright?" he asked the person gruffly, now kneeling before it. He knew it was a Death Eater by the black of their robes, and shortly concluded that it was a woman.

"Yes," sobbed the girl, and he recognized it as the voice of Anya, though in much despair. Now came the internal struggle; to do what is humane (something he had lost a long time ago) or to do what he normally would do. 

"You don't seem very alright," he ventured uneasily.

"That shows how little you know. I'm just fine, now go away," she answered in a harsh voice. Severus stood and turned to go, taking a few steps… yet something made him turn around. He looked back at the poor, broken figure on the ground and realized it was a personification of how he felt every day when he woke up and looked in the mirror. Somewhere, deep, deep, down inside of him, Severus felt a twang of understanding and sympathy beneath his callused exterior. He resolved that he would help the girl, but he wasn't going to be nice about it; that might give away too much.

"What are you doing here?" he asked, settling himself firmly down beside her.

"Didn't I tell you to leave?"

"Yes, but I don't listen very well and I'm horribly stubborn. What are you doing here?"

She sighed, finally calming down some. "Damn stubborn men, determined to weasel their way into everything, even if it is no concern to them. If you really must know, I'm waiting to die, now shove off so I can die in peace."

"Die? How do you propose this death shall come to you?" he asked, wondering if she was half out of her mind, which was reflected in his voice.

"Do not entertain my ideas as if I were a small child! For your information, I'm going to bleed to death," was the reply. 

"Where are you hurt?" he said, his tone a little more commanding.

She lifted her head up to look at him, though all he saw was the outline of a face and shadows. "What does it matter to you? I'm just another Death Eater, I'm just another one of them. If you had any dignity at all you'd finish me off here and now, at least sparing me the torment, even if I do deserve it."

"I'm an incredibly dignified person-" he started, and she made a derisive sound. "but people like you bring out a little less dignity in me, now tell me where you're hurt before I have to find out myself." She studied his face, and though he could not see hers, he could sense the distrust. "Look, what's the worst that could happen?"

"…You're the Death Eater from across the Circle, aren't you?" She paused, studying him more while he nodded once. "Oh fine, I see you're bound and determined to rescue me, though I'm telling you now it's not worth it. My back and my side." And she went back to resting her head in her arms, mumbling something about nosy men.

Severus looked at her back and noticed it was soaked with blood, which left huge dark, shining patches on her cloak. "Dear God," he whispered. He stared for a second more, then regained composure. "Would I wound your pride so terribly if you let me go get something from my tent?"

"Help. Hurt. What's the difference?" she quietly. "Go ahead if it will make you feel better." So he stood and went back to his room to grab a few supplies, then found her again in the forest, exactly as she was, except a little woozier.

"Are you light-headed?" he asked her in a more business-like tone, and she nodded. "Anya, I'm going to take your cloak off of you, alright?" He dealt with wounded Death Eaters on the side of making potions. No one really knew how to heal their own wounds they received in battle, and some purposefully did not so they could show them off later. However, some of the more serious ones were brought to him to heal.

She nodded again, this time a little reluctantly. "That's another thing," she added, half her senses gone with the loss of blood. "They always want to get your cloak off and see how far they can get. Dirty lot, they all are."

"Yes, all of humanity is scum, but I can assure you that I'm not trying to get you into bed, I'm just fixing your back so you don't bleed all over the place. Besides, Voldemort wouldn't be too happy if he lost his assassin," Severus said quietly, trying to talk her into being a little more calm, but she stiffened as she heard His name. 

Gently, and with a bit of her help, he removed her cloak and folded it, placing it next to him. He then asked her permission to at least undo the back of her robes, and she consented after some silence. What he saw there made him curse under his breath. There were horrible, deep, ragged scrapes dug out of her back, zigzagging like lighting bolts, each oozing blood and livid red. There were other healed scars too, but they were not deep; they were simply wide shining ribbons across her back.

Shaking his head, he soaked a towel with water from his wand, wrung it in the leaves next to them, and then pressed it to her back softly. She flinched, despite his gentleness. He withdrew it, then picked up his wand and whispered a spell to make her numb for some minutes. Visibly she relaxed and he continued about his task, stopping the blood flow after a few minutes. Then, when he was sure there was no more blood, he proceeded to heal the wounds with his wand, slowly moving it over the trenches in her back with the skin mending itself seamlessly along the way. Though these wounds had vanished without a trace, her other scars would not heal. He was puzzled at these wounds, but buttoned her robes back up and helped her to her feet without a word. She put her cloak on in a daze with her back turned to him so he still couldn't glimpse her face.

Almost immediately she stumbled, and he caught her. "You've lost a good deal of blood…" he explained to her as he would a small child, and she nodded that she knew and made a sound of exasperation.

"I've never really done this before, but… do you think you could take me back to my tent? I don't really know where I am," she managed to murmur with as much dignity as she could muster, and he agreed. Everyone knew where her tent was, directly next to the Master's. As Severus walked with her there, his mind begin to be taken over with curiosity and concern (not concern, no, no concern at all… just curiosity… maybe a little concern…_) as to what had caused those ripped stripes in her back. When they had finally reached her tent, he was tempted to keep her outside and question her, but couldn't make any words come out of his mouth, so he bade her goodnight in his acidic way, and turned with a swoosh of his cloak, disappearing. He contemplated why he couldn't make words form, and scowled, utterly disgusted with himself for being so…caring._

Weeks passed once more before he saw her again at a meeting to discuss a stake out that had to take place in order to watch the patterned movement of the Light side. Conversation was serious and to the point, as usual, but Severus found his mind wandering and his eyes averting over to the figure kneeling next to Voldemort. He saw that she was looking up at him too, and quickly hung her head again. They played this sort of peeking game for the second time in their lives for the next ten minutes, bound and determined to catch the other looking at them. Severus found himself smiling in the shadows of his hood, but quickly snapped out of it when they announced who was going to the stake out. Anya was suggested for obvious reasons, and to his surprise, someone suggested that he go with her, along with four other Death Eaters. All agreed to go with murmured obedience to their Master.

What they did not know was that Severus had rejoined with the Light side in the past week. Disgusted with his actions, and so very weary of death, he found himself feeling trapped and cornered with the Dark side. He knew that in the end, the Light side would win, no matter how much the Dark side prospered. So, with the last few scraps of dignity he had, he appealed to Dumbledore in secret the previous week, who accepted him warmly back into the numbers. He knew he would never be able to lead a normal life in among the Light side, but he also knew one day he would quit the Dark side for good, and that thought alone was his comfort. Until then, he was instructed to act as he normally would, even if it meant killing (though he was to avoid actually killing whenever possible) and brewing potions. The information he passed them was valuable.

The following morning after the meeting, Severus arose early and, safely placing his wand in his belt and his dagger alongside it, left his tent to wait for the others in the clearing. Another figure joined him shortly, and it was undoubtedly Anya. He felt his heart jump slightly but quieted it with a scowl.

"Feeling better?" he asked quietly, though sounding nonchalant, taking a step towards her to keep the conversation just between them.

"Yes… I never got to thank you… you didn't have to do that," she replied, voice free of ice, but trying to retain her noble manner.

"Yes, I did. I did trip over you, after all," he started, but he never got to finish because three others came walking up. They waited for one other person, then Apparated to another forest and set up a small camp there (spelling the area to make them invisible). They all waited quietly in a circle, waiting and listening. After some hours, the other four men got tired of just sitting and went off to see if there were other places the people from the other side could rendezvous from, leaving her and Severus there until sometime that night. Severus had feared this; he had no idea what to say to her.

As soon as the other men had left, Anya made a sound of disgust and stood, kicking a few leaves off the ground. "I hate McCleland, he's trouble." She said this in reference to the leader of the four men, a large burly man with a red face and a hot temper. "I probably shouldn't have told you that, especially with this 'brotherhood among all Death Eaters' thing, but he's trouble. Watch him." And with that she paced around their former circle once and sat down a little closer to him, he noticed. He picked up a stick and poked the leaves around, but was really studying her out of the corner of his eye. She was elegant and fluid in motion, conveying with her hands what she could not with her face. He thought she had pretty hands, but nearly slapped himself when he found his mind wandering up her sleeve. No, thoughts must stay exterior to the clothing, Severus_, he thought to himself. Severus wondered what she thought of him, and, being the insecure young man he was, knew that he wasn't much to look at. He was very tall and slender, with shoulder-length, lank black hair and large black eyes, yet pale skin. Severus turned his attention to the ground and his mind off his appearance, scrounging around in the leaves like he was trying to find the words to start a conversation._

Shockingly enough though, conversation came easily to the two after a few minutes. Later, she did confess that she usually did not speak to people on missions, but was intrigued in their conversation and how fast they seemed to connect. They talked about everything from the other members of the Circle to where they grew up, though she was very cautious about revealing too much to him. When he bluntly asked her why she did this, she hesitantly brought him into her confidence and told him that she had actually run away from home when she was 16, but then quickly changed the subject. This was alright with Severus, since he did not want to force anything from her; asking more would only hunger his insatiable curiosity more. He rather enjoyed her company (he did not let her in on this notion, but kept it to himself), but that funny nervous feeling never seemed to fully leave his stomach.

Both were startled when the group had come back, all four sure this was the only place the Light side could meet up. Anya stood and moved herself farther away from Snape, pacing restlessly across from him. The men were right, as about twenty minutes later, a group of people Apparated the path nearby, and another group soon appeared. The groups joined and passed documents back and forth, laughing and talking. The Death Eaters watched silently, almost hungrily. After a short amount of time, one of the other Death Eaters, McCleland, walked over to Anya and stood by her.

"I'm going for the tall one," he said, pointing to a tall man in the Light side group.

"We're under orders to merely observe," she said coolly. He stood his ground.

"If we come back with those documents, the Dark Lord won't care one way or the other. What, do the Mudblood-lovers mean something to you, slut?" he taunted. She withdrew her dagger in a flash and pinned him against a nearby tree, blade at his neck.

"I said we're observing. You do otherwise and it's mutiny, McCleland. Mutiny is punishable by instant death, but I'd be tempted to drag it out, long and painful," she hissed. The man grew several shades paler, but leered at her. She released him with a sound of disgust and turned to address the others, who had backed up slightly. "They're staying the night by the looks of it, so we're doing the same. One of us will stand guard while the others sleep. I'll go first."

The others silently found spots around the clearing and slept on the leafy forest floor, the warm night air as their blankets. Anya sat at the base of a tree and watched the other camp with interest. Figures stood laughing and sitting around a fire, some speaking in loud booming voices. Hours passed, and just as she felt her eyes grow heavy, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked up to see Severus standing over her, then watched him kneel next to her.

"You've been here long enough, I'll take over," he said, acting as if this were normal conversation. She nodded, but didn't move.

"…Do you ever wonder what it's like? To be one of them, I mean," she asked, hazarding mutiny to the wind and sounding softer than usual. "They look happy."

Severus sighed. "Yes, sometimes I do." He was cautious, making sure his tone was just sheer curiosity. He really wanted to say that he hated the Dark side, that he hated himself more and more every day, and that his only redemption was coming back to the Light side, but this was dangerous to say to someone so close to the Master. Yet he wanted to tell her. It was the strangest thing, he'd met the girl only a few weeks before and only spent a few hours with her today, but he felt like he'd known her forever.

"You understand me very well," she said quietly, nearly echoing his thoughts. "It scares me a little. We shouldn't… get too close. It's just not good in our line of duty. We could end up saying things we regret."

"That's true," he replied.

"You shouldn't get yourself wrapped up in someone like me anyway. I'm a bad person."

"I don't think so." Not now Severus, now is not a good time to be all mushy and sentimental…damn it, too late.

"What?"

"I don't think you're a bad person."

She looked to him flatly, head tilted sideways. "I'm **many** things that are not good, including a killer."

"I still don't think you're a bad person, and you're going to have trouble convincing me otherwise. We're all killers though, in our own way," His voice dropped to an even lower whisper. He studied her a moment, and, in his usual intelligently gruff manner stated, "If you want to know what I think, I think you hate your position as much as I hate mine."

She turned her head away, a large, heavy silence falling over both young individuals. "I… don't…how did you know? How do you know any of this?" she said in a half-ashamed, half-astonished murmur. 

"I know your type very well indeed." He readjusted himself to be sitting comfortably next to her, but accidentally brushed her hand in the process, leaving him with a hugely electric sensation in his hand. Her attention was brought back to his face, and she had almost recoiled when her hand touched his, but kept it near his. Both were waiting, watching, mistrusting, attempting to beat themselves down, and above all, hoping that something would happen, that the other would make the move, but exceedingly reluctant to make it themselves. Finally, she whispered half a word to him, and both snapped at the same time and caught the other in a gentle kiss. For one golden, perfect second, the world and its worries were washed away, and it was simply them. However, reality rushed back to them in a wavelike roar, and they both pulled back.

"Oh Merlin, we shouldn't have done that," she said breathily.

"I know, I know."

"Do you know the trouble we'd be in? It's wrong, it's so very wrong. Master would kill us both. I shouldn't have done that to you. I barely even know you," she said, fearful and quiet.

"And I barely know you."

"And what did I tell you, eh? All men want to do is get your cloak off," she said, torn between cockiness and nervousness.

"And women can never decide what they want…Do you want to do it again?" he asked her in a simple, yet somewhat cocky voice.

"Yes." And she kissed him. It was the most amazing thing he had ever felt. Explosions went off in his mind and a stunning wave of shock coursed through his veins, rendering him senseless. Her fingers crept to his hand, lightly stroking it absent-mindedly, which sent more electricity through his body, almost blinding his mind. The whole world could have opened up beneath his feet and he would have never noticed. She was reluctant in how she kissed, scared and shy, and he sensed that she knew this was forbidden. Somewhere deep in his mind it registered that someone had hurt her, hurt her so badly that her ability to be affectionate would always be coupled with fear. When he blindly reached up and touched her face though, her boundaries seemed to melt a bit, and the kissed deepened, plunging him headfirst into a world of sensation.

Eventually she pulled back, but not before stealing two more light kisses from his lips. "I think, uh I'll go sleep now," she said, dazed and shaking slightly. He nodded, trying to recapture his mind from its tumble so that he could process what just happened. Did I just do that?

Later that night, after Severus' shift was over and he was sleeping under a fir tree, he sat up quickly at the sound of a deep scream. Jumping to his feet, he saw Anya already running through the trees and then punching a Death Eater straight in the face, knocking him to the ground.

"You prat!" she screamed at the figure on the ground. "You pulled rank on me, you worthless git! Damn it, now they're coming for us." She looked to Severus. "Fight or run?"

"Run, we're outnumbered," he said decisively, and she nodded and called for everyone to Apparate. The man on the ground suddenly disappeared, as did the other three. However, one member of the Light side had already come around and was now attacking her, but she beat him over the head with the hilt of her sword and Apparated. 

Severus walked over to the man, and after revealing his identity, helped the man stand up. He then told the man that the Dark side now knew that information was being exchanged here and to report to Dumbledore to change spots. The man nodded, a bit bewildered, but patted him on the shoulder. It was a feeling Severus wouldn't forget, and he knew he was on the right side again, the good side. He Apparated back to the Death Eater clearing, running into Anya. The danger was over and the silence rung in his ears.

However, the danger wasn't as over as he thought. Anya grabbed him by the sleeve of his robe and dragged him away from everyone else, into the forest's shadowy depth. When they were finally somewhere quiet, she stopped and let go of him, pacing around him. Finally, she came to a stop in front of him, posture looking quite firm. "You're one of them, aren't you? No one lags that much in Apparition." Her tone wasn't accusatory, but rather curious.

This was his ultimate decision. Was she just using him? Did Voldemort really suspect him and was he just using her to play spy? Yet there was something about the way she reacted when he had told her that she hates her position that made him think she was sincere. He couldn't risk discovery, but… something told him that she wouldn't rat him out. "Yes," he said finally. The word hung in the air.

"I envy you," she said finally, and turned to walk away. "I won't tell anyone, don't worry," she said in a small voice. "You can trust me." And she walked off, leaving him to his thoughts.

Weeks flew by, and for Severus they were some of the most confusing weeks he had ever experienced. For one thing, he was playing double spy, and that was tough to keep up with, yet no one suspected him. For another, he was now meeting with Anya in the forest when they could spare the time, just to see her. First she had dragged him out there to ask him questions about the Light side and what it was like, but after a few meetings like this, their conversation wandered. A deep bond had sprung up before them, and neither could ignore it nor deny it, though they tried. Somehow though, she always ended up in his arms before the night was over, listening to him talk or just staring at the stars. 

Anya was very paranoid about anyone finding out, but Severus promised her that it would be alright. He seemed to have a calming effect on her, and she was more relaxed around him. She loved him very deeply, listening to his problems with being a double spy and identifying with his feelings about still being a Death Eater. He ached to save her from this life, to bring her back to the Light side, but knew she wouldn't go. A mysterious something tied her to the life of a Death Eater, and she could not let go. They loved each other strongly though, for no one else could understand them the way the other did, and no one else could complete them quite the same way. Often did they dream of when the fight was over, when the battlefields were vacant, and when they could live happily together on their own and away from all that is destructive. The love that developed between them was untouchable; nothing could taint it, nothing could harm it, what they had was beautiful, pure, and solid. While being callused, tough fighters on the battlefield and remaining a step away from death every day, a gentleness was extracted from the very core of their hearts for the other, and they treated their love as if made of hollow glass, for their hearts surely were without the other. Their only fear was losing the other.

Then, one fateful night, Severus waited up for her as he usually did, sitting at the base of a large tree, but she was late. When she finally did get there, she did not seem herself, and would not sit with him. He stood, and after a few analytical minutes, Severus asked what was wrong. When she turned away from him, he grabbed her wrist, only to see her flinch. He held up her hand to the moonlight and as her sleeve slipped back, it revealed large purple bruises around her wrists.

"Who did this to you?" he asked, anger mounting. He feared the answer, and when there came none, he knew and released her hand. "He made the wounds on your back too, didn't he?" 

She leaned back against the tree, and Severus could tell she was struggling, even if he couldn't see her face.

"Yes," she replied hoarsely, seeming withdrawn. She cleared her throat of impending emotion. "Yes, he did." A profound silence settled in his ears, which suddenly rang with anger.

"How long has Voldemort been treating you like this?" he asked, stiffening slightly. 

Her voice grew bitter and hard. "Everyone thought it was some sort of mutual relationship, like I was doing it to advance in rank and power. Like I wanted to be his toy, his toy he could do whatever he wanted with. How long, you ask? Since about three weeks after I was initiated. Lovely, isn't it? I never wanted to be with him, ever. I hate myself for letting him, but there's not much I can do. Don't hate me." Her voice had grown thick with emotion and she bowed her head, slowly collapsing to the ground in defeat.

"I don't. I never will." And he sunk to the dirt next to her, gently gathering her up in his arms and simply holding her silently for hours, both deep in thought. The next time he could manage to see her, some weeks later, Severus begged her to come away with him. He wanted to run away with her, let her escape all this and be free. She said and knew she couldn't, that it was already too late, so he gave her the pendant as a promise to her that he would get her away some day, and she had kissed him with one of her devastatingly emotional kisses. However, they had heard someone coming and he had Apparated off to a Light meeting he was having that night. They thought the incident had gone unnoticed by the intruder McCleland, as he had not seen anyone but her, but they were wrong.

Anya and McCleland got into a fight again after he had insulted her the next day, leaving him with a broken nose and half his hearing temporarily lost, along with a few cracked ribs. This was the final straw for him, so he went to Voldemort, telling him the story of how he had come across Anya talking in the forest with another man, one he suspected was a Light side recruiter. The Dark Lord had noticed a lack of loyalty in her lately, and used this story to bring her to trial before all the other Death Eaters.

Less than a week later, when Severus was out on mission for the Light side (though supposedly out on mission for the Dark side), Anya was brought before the Circle and brought up on accusations of disloyalty to him and to the cause. She denied being unfaithful to the cause, but never said a word about being innocent of wavering loyalty to her master. He threatened her with death, he beat her, but she was resolute in keeping the name of her lover a secret. Therefore, her throat was slit and she was left for dead, her secret taken with her to the grave.

No one knew that Severus had come back early until later, and stood at the back of the crowd, watching the only thing he loved and the only person that had understood him being taunted and tormented in front of a crowd. When Voldemort knocked her to the ground, she looked up and saw Severus there, and he felt her eyes connect with his before she quickly looked away. He silently screamed for them to let her go, but knew he could not say a word. Panic was invading him, along with a dreadful fear. His exterior showed the cold, stiff man he was, eyes set straight ahead on the figure kneeling on the ground, but inside, he was a wreck of fury, fear, guilt, and sadness. He nearly cried out when he swiftly cut her throat open and dropped her to the ground, but his eyes only reflected a grimace beneath the shadows of his hood. With that fateful stroke of the sword, everything good, everything emotional and everything confident was cut from Severus' heart with the steely blade of Irony and Death, leaving him pained, hardened and bitter. Unfixable for life, his soul dropped and shattered, and his glass heart was now solid ice. He wished to rush to her body and hold her, to tell her one last time that everything would be alright, but as luck would have it, someone spotted him and he was drug along to the continuation of the Circle meeting. He had no memory of what happened after he was wretched from his standing place, as the scene of his love being slashed was replayed in his mind a thousand times over that night. Anya's body was cold and alone now, something that broke him. 

After the meeting, Severus Apparated to Hogwarts, stumbled up to the castle not really knowing why he was there, and found his way to Dumbledore's office, where Dumbledore waited patiently at his desk for Severus to report back to him. After a considerable silence, the whole story was retold in hard, harsh tones to the sweet-tempered and concerned old wizard, who had previously known nothing of the girl besides what was reported in the papers, and much less of her relations to Severus. Dumbledore listened and tried to console him, but nothing helped, for a part of himself was lost that night.

In the following months, Severus slipped into depression. He began taking the Anxiety Potion to wash away his sorrow, and soon found himself heavily addicted. Both sides knew that Severus had reached a low, but one side didn't know enough to care and the other didn't care enough to know. He didn't care who cared though, all he knew was that he was slowly dying, drowning in sorrow and being tortured every night with the sounds of her voice crying to him in his dreams. He felt he deserved it. She had been unswervingly loyal to him, even when faced with death, and when she was on the brink of death, who had come to rescue her? No one, yet he was right there. They may have both died in the attempt, but Severus thought it would have been better that way. Severus took to the Anxiety Potion hard, as he did to Sleeping Draughts.

Eventually the combination of the two began to take its toll on him. One night, when Dumbledore was set to rendezvous with Severus, he had come to the spot in the forest only to find Snape unconscious and half-alive, slung over a log. Dumbledore Apparated him back to Hogwarts and, having woken him up, helped him to Madame Pomfrey's. He was little help in the matter though, as he was struggling and fighting to escape from the nurse, being physically dragged all the way there. He didn't need anyone's help; he didn't deserve to be helped when he could not help others. Eventually they restrained him enough to keep him there, and began pouring antidotes down his throat. Dumbledore later told him that he had been rambling in fits of delirium, and that most his rambles were about how he was waiting for Anya. 

Finally, Severus was able to come to terms with her death. For the rest of his stay in the hospital wing, he lay pondering his situation, and finally resolved to tuck her away in a safe place in his mind, and move ahead with life, but it took a long time for him to be pulled out of his depression. After that night in the hospital, Severus openly declared himself to belong to the Light side, but for months after he wondered about like a zombie, bereft of emotion.

He began teaching Potions part-time as a job offered to him by Dumbledore to get him back on his feet and safe within the confines of the ancient magical school. He grew to love his job, and in comparison it was like moving from hell to heaven. He was now in a place where he could be safe and respected, as opposed to fearing being killed in his sleep and the slave of a psychotic killer. Just as he was growing accustomed to his job, he heard the rumor that Lily and James Potter (his archenemy from school) were dead, and that their son had caused the downfall of Voldemort. This rumor proved to be true, and from that Halloween night forth, the wizarding world picked up the pieces of their lives and began rebuilding, always praising The Boy Who Lived. The next year, Severus began teaching full time as the prior professor quit to travel the world, now that You-Know-Who was defeated. Life progressed slowly as everyone tried to mold their lives back into something resembling happiness, and no one worked harder than Severus to build up this façade.

~

Severus relived a milder, facts-only based story to her so as not to startle her more than necessary. However, by the time he had finished his woeful tale, she was staring blankly through him, as if seeing something he could not. After he finished, he leaned back, his head in his hands, then looked back up at her. Silence ensued. 

"You never saw her face or knew her last name?" she asked, voice barely above a whisper. He shook his head. "And you think I'm her?" More silence, which confirmed her answer.

She suddenly looked resolute, and stood, looking at him sharply. "Then there's only one logical thing to do… my papers of resignation will be on Dumbledore's desk in the morning." With that, she walked to the door, but, after a second of staring at her in shock, he stood and grabbed her by the wrist.

"That won't be necessary," he said.

"It is, I'm a dangerous person. I don't deserve to be here," she said stiffly, still not looking at him.

"No, you were never dangerous, you followed orders. I followed orders, but I'm still here, aren't I?"

"And Donovan followed orders and look what he did! I don't belong here, Severus," she said bitingly, her voice broke when she said his name, fighting back deep held emotions. Quickly, she regained her composure and her expressions turned icy.

"Cassandra, that's because he died AS a Death Eater. You WERE a Death Eater, and it wasn't even you. Eh, look at me, don't turn away from me. Look at me. Anya died that night; there is no more Anya. You are who you've become, not what you were," he said softly to her after she had finally returned her eyes to his. He placed a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up at him searchingly, as if lost in the world and only knowing the one person who stood before her. "Don't resign."

She continued to stare at him longingly. Finally, in a quiet, resigned voice, she said, "Alright… alright. I won't resign and I'll still teach, but I need some time to think this through. So… I'll tell you when I've got this sorted out." He nodded in understanding, but the next thing he knew, she was in his arms and he was holding her tight. He was never sure if he pulled her there or if she had thrown herself against him, but she hugged him, maybe for the last time in awhile, neither knew. Finally she let go, a little uncomfortable looking, and opened the door.

Just before she left she paused. "Virtov," she said. "Anya Virtov of the forests of Moscow." Nodding, she left the bedroom and left to go to her own room. With a sigh, Severus touched the door to shut it more, then walked over to his bed, stretching out and looking at the ceiling.

There. He had done it, he had explained it, it was off his chest. So why didn't he feel like the heavy burden was removed? Because he knew there was a good chance she'd fall into insecurities about him, and want to leave him. Rightfully so, he didn't think he deserved her in the first place. Already he was starting to become self-deprecating, and he knew the next few weeks would be hell.

~

And they were for both Cassi and Severus. February slipped into March, and the month of the changing seasons rolled on, though agonizingly painful. Cassi taught as normal, talked as normal, acted as normal, but was anything but normal on the inside. Ever since she had heard Severus' story, she had begun collecting huge chunks of her memory, and now her puzzle was nearly complete. It was killing her. Now she could relive the horrors of being a Death Eater and her less than happy childhood, and those alone were driving her insane. At night she paced her room, deep in thought, and rarely did she sleep. She began skipping meals too, just sitting in her classroom, staring off into space with a look of deep concentration on her face. Never had she thought that knowing her past would hurt her so much, but now she did know and all she could do was dwell, dwell and aimlessly saunter about in her memory, coming across horrifying things.

Somewhere in the back of her mind, there were hidden emotions forming that pride wouldn't let her reveal. Before she fell asleep at night, and when her mind totally wandered, she found herself wishing to go back to Severus, but not able to do it. She wanted to though, oh did she want to. More than once did she catch herself thinking that she was neither as brave or as strong as he was, that she could not weather this alone, but could not go back on her word until she sorted through all these emotions, something she just didn't think she could survive. It made her experience all the more anguished.

She couldn't explain how she felt though. There was confusion in her mind as to who she was and what her true nature was. Was she the natural born killer of bitter sorrows, or the simple, cynical girl with trust issues? Or was she some sort of intermediate, both and none at the same time? Severus' words that Anya had died that night drifted across her thoughts at times, and from there grew a slight sense of stability. But how was she to handle this, handle herself? She had taken lives, and many of them. Horrors that few people of this world had experienced were now part of her. Did she continue to go on about her life as if nothing had happened, or should she withdraw herself from her place, undeserving of the job and societal place's prestige in comparison to her own blackened history? How she wished he was horrible at keeping _his _word, and would come to her to demand that she make up her mind! He wouldn't, and she couldn't, so both did nothing. The roof over their heads was the closest they came to being near each other at times, but even then, very few words were said. It stung both to the point of agonizing, blinding pain. 

~

Severus was grappling as well. He watched her suffer daily, though no one else saw it. The others would never understand, they had never lived through the Death Eater experience, but he had, as had she (miraculously enough). He cursed the moon by night, condemning it for being so bright and waxing and waning, as his luck did. Fate had never favored him, and now was no exception. Just as he had found some happiness in this life, something that made this world a little more bearable, it had been snatched from him, then twisted and gagged before his eyes.

He had given the situation thought, and kept coming back to one conclusion: He didn't care who she was, he loved her. There were times when he wondered if the thought of her being his former love made her more appealing, but he soon found that it did not matter one way or the other. He was not in love with the idea of Anya (for indeed, the 15 years had healed those wounds and acceptance was finally reached), but he was still yearning for Cassi. Who would not come back to him. More than convinced, he was certain that once thought through logically, she wouldn't want him anymore. He hadn't been able to protect her then, he didn't risk it all for her as he should have, he made everything about their relationship difficult… basically, he had degraded himself down to the point of not being worthy to look her in the eye. But how he wished to help her when he did perchance steal a glance! She meant more to him than even he was aware of, which he could be aware of had he let himself think so wishfully. But the old, callused Severus of years of isolation and pain told him not to think about it, for wishful thinking only means tortured, hopeless wanting of things unreachable. Moons appeared and disappeared over their heads, stars shone and dimmed, and clouds passed through their patch of sky… such was the procession of time.

By the end of March, the weather had turned to something springier and less wintry, but their frozen communications were unmelted. This week, clouds had stationed themselves over the castle like furious gray blankets, threatening to rain on their place of learning. 

It had been dismal lately. Both Severus and Cassi were being driven over the edge by their silence to each other, though neither had the courage or the pride to break it. It saddened and broke them at the same time, and finally it was beginning to show. Severus was horrible to his students, snapping at them for any little thing. Cassandra was inattentive, tired, and high strung, though always maintaining the strict hand she held over her classroom, proving that she could be better than her most her predecessors. The untold icy tensions between the teachers was palpable, and the students were more than grateful when a Hogsmeade trip was announced, even more so when they found that only one of them would be escorting them.

Cassi stared out the window with dampened spirits. She didn't feel quite right, everything was a little… surreal. Convinced that she had, once again, overworked, undereaten, and underslept, she felt a slight worry being lifted once she had found the cause of her odd well being. Looking at he clock, she noted the time with some confusion and then continued to work at her desk, flipping through books to begin compilations of her complete history of Voldemort. She was determined to keep it confined to what she gathered from books and studies, and would not insert anything that could indicate her involvement in this period of history. However, the business was a depressing one, and quickly she found herself sunken and chilled. It was rather cold in there. She coughed, feeling bruised in her lungs, but thought nothing of it. Was it time to go? No… dinner was still an hour off.

Dazed, she decided to take a walk to clear her head. Her traveling cloak hung on a peg near her desk, so she swiftly grabbed it and her knife (placing it in the hems of her robes, for the habit of being armed with something more than a wand would not be broken), and left her classroom. Somewhere in the mists of her mind, she wondered where Severus was, but quickly cleared him out of her thoughts, for she immediately ached for him. Instead, she turned her mind to other school aspects, and sauntered out the big wooden doors of Hogwarts.

Once outside, the wind blew around her, unusually cold and foul. She pulled her cloak tight around her and walked off across the vast expanse of grounds. Hagrid's hut was to her left, so she went right, not wanting to bump into anyone. Her mind was indeed hazy, but the sharp wind was breathing alertness into her. Finally she reached the edge of the woods and began to walk when she heard cheerful whistling. Hagrid was coming from the other side of the bend and would wonder why she's out here, for he had not seen her in awhile. Quickly, and without thinking, she ducked into the forest, it's shadows immediately cast over her. 

Forests were no problem, really. She had grown up in one, spent much of her youth in another, and had gone through a few in her travels. This one was no exception and the tall trees with their large roots weaving through the mossy soil like cloth actually comforted her some. At that moment, a crackle of lightening reached her ears, followed by the deep rumble of thunder. Rain began to pour from the sky, and she was immediately drenched, through cloak and robes. This did not stop her, so she trudged on through the forest, still pacing the grounds, but through a larger circumference. It was rather cold though. She coughed again.

A snap of a twig made her look up quickly, drawing her wand in front of her. To her complete surprise, the last person she expected to see walked out from behind the tree, and that was Severus Snape. Both froze and stared at each other hard, then she put her wand back into her sash and walked on, hoping to pass him wordlessly. However, this did not happen, for he stepped in front of her as she came closer to him. Her heart was pounding in her ears, and when she had first seen him, it had skipped a beat and her stomach had dropped. She was beginning to feel slightly weak, but did not show it.

"Cassandra," he said quietly, looking quickly up and down her sopping wet robes with curiosity. 

"Severus," she replied. 

"Cassandra… you don't look well at all."

"I'm just fine. Now, if you please, I ah…. " Everything was getting a little fuzzy and words weren't coming to her. She coughed, turning away from him slightly and hiding her face in her hands.

"Cassandra, are you ill?" he asked.

"I told you, I'm fine! Can't even cough without someone jumping all over me. I would like to finish my walk now."

"In the rain-"

"Yes, in the rain," she said hollowly, though her words sounded as they normally did. She spied the bag of random grasses and herbs that hung from his arm, and concluded that he had come here to pick potion ingredients. "I'll leave you to your ha- harvesting…" Things were getting blurrier. It was very cold. She coughed again. By this time, the concern was notable in Severus' eyes, so he made no move to unblock her path. 

"You're being incredibly stubborn," she said, dazed. "Go back to being a professor, for you are not a very good barr…barri…barrier…". She had tried to go around him while she ended her sentence, but something happened and she buckled, her vision turning off and all sounds being drowned out. The forest floor rushed up to meet her, but then she felt it suspend in front of her a few feet off as warm arms cradled her. She slept.

~

Opening her eyes, Cassi looked around. She was in her bedroom, and things were as they normally were, with the exception of a chair being placed near her nightstand. Had it been a dream? No, for she did not move that chair there. Then why was she here? Wasn't she supposed to be escorting the kids back from Hogsmeade? Groaning, she tried to lift herself up, but failed miserably. That's when she realized that she was wearing her long sleeved, white nightgown, something she knew she had not worn the night before.

"Oh! Look who decided to wake up! You gave us all quite a start," said a clear, business-like female voice. Cassi looked blearily to the door, where an older lady in robes and a hospital apron walked up to her, placing a hand on her forehead, then checking her pulse. "Tsk tsk," said the lady, now recognizable to Cassi as Madame Pomfrey, the dreaded nurse who had bandaged her foot when she had gotten into that mess with the Acromantula. "You got yourself in a bad way, didn't you? It was very lucky the professor was out there to catch you like he did."

"Not to be unsociable," started Cassi, who quickly found that her voice was scratchy and sore, "but why are we in my room? And for how long?"

"Bless you child, rest yourself! Got yourself in a right state, you did. Pneumonia, and the worst case of it I'd seen in years. You've also managed to catch a few other things, like the flu. Yes dear, have a bit of water, there you go. You've been laid up for four days now," said the kindly nurse, now concocting a medicine from a slew of bottles on Cassi's nightstand, where there also stood a pitcher of water and a glass. "If you had come to me from the off, you would have had no trouble at all!"

Cassi had nearly spit out her water, if she hadn't been too weak to do so. "F-four days?! Who's been teaching my classes?"

The nurse eyed her. "A substitute," she said finally. "Hmm, yes… overwork too. Dear me, child, you've got it all! Alright, no more excitement for the present. Please take this, and I'll be back in a few hours… we'll see if you can eat then. My my, you've been on IVs and everything! Just this morning I took it out. No, don't get up, go to sleep." With that, the nurse promptly left the room, and Cassi drifted off.

When she came to again, it was evening, and there were two voices in her room, a man and a woman's. For a second, she thought the male voice was Severus, and opened her eyes, only to see Dumbledore and Madame Pomfrey conversing near her door.

"Honestly, with all these visitors it's a wonder she's woken up as soon as she has!" said the nurse, sounding extremely protective.

"Poppy my dear, I assure you that I have not come to bother her. I wanted to see if she was well, for there are things I wish to discuss with her," he said in his genial sort of way, disarming her immediately. 

Madame Pomfrey spied her awake, then turned back to Dumbledore. "Well she's up now, at any rate. I'm giving you fifteen minutes, but not a second more, headmaster or not. She's got to get some rest if she wants to be teaching by next week, which I know she does. She nearly died when I told her she had already missed four days!" The nurse bustled out of the room, mumbling something to herself, then shutting the door behind her.

Dumbledore walked over to Cassi, and sat at the chair near her nightstand. She peered up at him, and was suddenly put at ease, for he seemed to have that effect on people. "We're glad to see you awake," he said, his voice soft and offset by a pair of gently twinkling blue eyes behind half moon, gold rimmed spectacles.

"Thank you, Headmaster. I'm sorry for-"

"Ah! No need to apologize. I think this vacation will greatly improve your health, for you've been quite dimmed for the past month and a half." She nodded at this. "You seem very dedicated to your work, but perhaps you've had too much of it lately, hmm yes. Oh! There was a Defense meeting last night, in which you were sorely missed. Sirius sends this, one of the other spies gave it to me," he continued kindly, and offered her a slip of paper. She grinned at it in a sad sort of way as she read it, then left it on the nightstand.

"If you see Sirius between now and then, tell him he's in trouble," she said, smiling. Dumbledore nodded and smiled.

"We were all very concerned for you… Severus was rather subdued. Well, more subdued than normal. He's ah, actually the reason I came here. I've noticed you've both been rather quiet in the other's presence, and believe I know the circumstances that caused this," he said, still being quite gentle in tone.

"Did he tell you?" she asked quietly, not looking up at him.

Dumbledore nodded slowly. "He consulted me before he told you, and I've known of your former self for a very long time, after the series of events took place several years ago."

"Then you know what I am. I tried to resign after he told me, but…"

"He wouldn't let you, yes. I told him not to let you, for I had a feeling you would try. There's no need for you to resign, you're an incredibly capable Defense teacher, the best we've had in years. You took the news rather harshly, I see."

"I'm a danger to the students, sir. I do not deserve the position."

"I haven't noticed you bringing any harm to my students, and I do think you deserve the position. Cassandra, you were given a second chance at life a long time ago, and look how much better you live! You have a stable job, food, shelter, dignity, respect, and a relationship. You may have not led a satisfying life the first time around, but when given another chance, you excelled, my dear," he stated kindly, much as a father would to a daughter, and patted her shoulder. She quickly wiped her eyes free of invading tears, for finally her feelings were made clear, and her path had been shown to her.

"Thank you, Dumbledore," she whispered.

"Your welcome, Ms. Talin. I still have to speak to you of a certain Potions Master who has locked himself in his dungeons and refused to come out for the past month or so. He seems to have been causing considerable stress upon the student population of late, and I believe I know the source of his silent anguish. His snowballing mood seems to have coincided with the time he told you his story, and has indeed worsened since you've been confined to your bed. I saw him the other night, walking about aimlessly just down the hall. 

Actually, since you've fallen sick, it's the most I've seen him out of his dungeon; he's been pacing around here for awhile. Madame Pomfrey, bless her soul, has barred him from your room since he found you and put you here, saying he might cause you or himself distress. She might be a bit sore from the argument which followed; he wouldn't let you be taken to the Hospital Wing, and she wanted to put you there, but in the end he won, so she's been tending you here. At any rate, I think he wants to see you, but is reluctant to seem imposing. Do you think you would permit him to see you?" said Dumbledore, eyes shining somewhere between amusement, curiosity, and seriousness. 

Cassi listened to him carefully, and thought for a moment, heart pounding hard. "Yes, I'd like to see him but… can we wait a day or two?"

"Whatever for?"

"…I don't want to get him sick as well," she replied.

Dumbledore laughed and stood, but not before leaning over and patting her head. "You're good for him, you really are." He smiled and stood, letting a very huffy Madame Pomfrey back into the room as he left. 

She banged her potion bottles around a little harder than normal while mixing up some more medicine for Cassi. When she handed her the small cup of brew, she said to her, "I couldn't help overhearing the last part of that conversation, and I'd like to input that I agree with the Headmaster. I haven't seen the lad so happy since, well, ever. Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen him _happy_, per say. Just grumpy. But less so since he's been around you."

"Ay," said Cassi, blushing furiously, "how aware is the whole school of my… relations to him?" 

"Oh, you know how the kids are. They'll take anything and run with it, anything is worth gossiping about. There's no such thing as private affairs in this school, Ms. Talin. You've had your excitement for the day now, I want you to rest up and you'll be back to teaching by Monday. But if you overwork yourself, I'll take you kicking and screaming back to my Hospital Wing and keep you there, Severus bickering and growling the whole way," said Madame Pomfrey in conversational tones as she checked her fever, pulse, and breathing. Cassi hated being fussed over like this, but took her potion without complaining and watched the nurse head out of the room.

She sunk down into her pillow, still not feeling particularly well, but better all the same. Her mind was soaring at the conversation she had just had with Dumbledore, and she finally felt peace coming to her mind and heart. He was right, as always. Maybe she had just been looking at it all wrong, and her new viewpoint strengthened her. She knew it would still take time to get over the shock of learning her black past, but she also knew she'd get through it. The information about Severus gruffly pining away in his dungeons made her smile, and she fell asleep with the image of him trying to reorganize something that was already perfect

For the next two days, Cassi was subjected to Madame Pomfrey's over-protective care, taking her potions quietly and listening to her ramble on about how teachers are just as bad as kids about getting sick, working too hard, walking about in the rain, etc. Although Cassi deemed her a kind person, she was delighted when she was told that her fever had broken (though she was still very weak) on Saturday and that one more day of bed rest ought to put her well enough to teach the following day, along with taking it easy for the next few weeks. 

After getting cleaned up and dressed dizzily (though still in a nightgown for fear of The Wrath of the Nurse reigning down on her if she chanced to check up on her patient) on Sunday, Cassi lay nervously in her bed, tossing and turning for some time. When the nurse did come to bring her food at lunchtime, she asked if she could send for Severus, if he would agree to come. Madame Pomfrey mumbled something about emotional wrecks, but agreed to ask for him. Cassi ate as much of her food as she could, then magicked the tray and food away. She waited tensely in her bed, suddenly feeling ill. When there was a knock at the door, she jumped, startled, and called for them to enter.

Severus appeared at the door, shutting it behind him with the sound of Madame Pomfrey barking orders at him being muffled in its shutting. He stood there for a minute, shifting somewhat nervously, until she gestured for him to come sit on the bed close to her headboard so he wasn't out of arms reach, for the chair had been moved somewhere else. He did so silently, and her tension mounted. Her eyes raked over him, for she had not seen him in so long it was almost dreamlike to be in his presence again. Indeed, she thought she caught him looking at her the same way, but dismissed it, for the little insecure voice in her heart shouted that he could have changed his mind about her.

"Dumbledore told me that he talked with you the other night," he said finally, breaking the silence.

"Yes, he's a wonderful man. Very understanding," she said, and he nodded. She sat up in bed, and he looked at her with concern furrowing his eyebrows.

"Must you always let yourself get so sick?" he asked sternly. 

"I couldn't really tell that I was sick, I felt the same. Feeling sick, being sick, it was the same feeling," she admitted, and he looked away, folding his arms.

"I shouldn't have let you get so badly off. I shouldn't have put you through that," he said quietly, tone drowned in self-disgust.

"You know as well as I do that I always end up getting sick somehow. I get sick a lot, and it's my fault I got so badly off. As for telling me about Anya, you did what was right… I remember it all now."

He stared at her expectantly. "So you remember me?"

"Yes, I do."

He seemed to fidget slightly, still not looking at her. "Then you remember the night you were put on trial."

"Yes," she replied with a slight shiver, despite her long-sleeved sleeping gown. His face was blank, and his tone impossible to read. 

"And?"

"And what?"

Severus finally lost his self-composure, and said in loud frustration, "Then you remember that I couldn't even save you when I was but three meters away, and that I let them torment you without saying a word! How is it that you can remember this and still manage to look at me?" His thoughts had come out now, something extremely uncommon, but he could not have held this inside any longer, for 15 years had been long enough. "Does it not seem logical to you that this is the end? You should go off, find a better job than this, find a better person than me, and just… agh, I don't know, _be happy._" He sprung up from his seat now, indignant. "I don't understand why you stay here and permit yourself this sort of torture when you could easily distance yourself from me and be better off. I wrecked your life then, and I'm doing it again! What is here that makes you stay?"

Cassi caught a handful of his robes and forced him to sit back down on the bed facing her, and keeping him there with both her hands on his shoulders and semi-kneeling on the bed before him. When she spoke, it was forceful and full of meaning, but quavered sometimes as a knot in her throat formed. "There was no way for me to be saved Severus, and what if they had killed you and the Light side never got the information that they received after my slaying? There was _nothing_ you could have done, and _nothing_ I would have wanted you to do, for I would have rather taken my own life than let them harm you. You did _not_ wreck my life then; you took what was left of my life and made it bearable, why can't you let yourself see that? How can I stand to look at you, you ask? What do I have left here? All I have left is you, and I can look at you easily because I love you!" she said, shaking and scared. This all poured from her heart unfiltered, and she was now scared that he would laugh or scoff at her, for she had left herself vulnerable as he had been a few seconds before.

He looked at her hard, as if trying to process what was just said. No one had ever told him that they loved him so unconditionally, not even his own parents, and for her to say it was… peace to the war-torn soul, water to the thirsty, warmth to the frozen. He watched her drop her head after she finished this and pull her hands off him, bringing them in close to her as if shielding herself, and shutting her eyes tight so as not to see his reaction in case it was negative. He studied the woman before him who spoke of her love as if expecting to be hit for being so forward, and realized that how she looked was how he felt every time he opened himself to her. They were not different; both had insecurity scars that the other could heal, if they let them. Reaching out, he lifted her chin with a finger, and softly asked her to open her eyes, then looked into their cool depths.

"Y-you love me?" he asked, blinking and curious, almost in disbelief.

"Yes," she said, fighting back a wave of emotions. Gently, he pulled her into his lap (which was not hard for she was both light and sitting with her feet drawn up close to her), and ran his fingers down her cheek. She watched his eyes intently, but closed her own when he kissed her forehead, then felt him tilt her head up and kiss her lips tenderly. Slowly, she touched her hands to the back of his neck, leaving them there even after he had finished, both foreheads pressed to the other's gently and not daring to open their eyes. _That was almost so right it was wrong _he thought to himself. _She loves me, ME. Severus Snape, the evil Potions Master. The foul, horrible tempered Potions professor. She loves me. Ah, I love her too. I want to say that to her, for she's as insecure as I am, but I… don't know how. I can't just say I love you._ Somehow in his jumble of thoughts, his voice found itself and gave him away, verbalizing the last three words of his thoughts. "I love you" was whispered to her softly.

Cassi pulled back and looked at him, startled. He looked at her, curious. "Did you just say that you loved me?" she asked.

"Did I?"

"I believe so."

"Well… I do." She looked at him as he said this, and then kissed him, pressing her lips affectionately to his own, deeper than their last kiss. A second later, she was forced to wipe away the tears that were tumbling down her cheeks without permission, and then broke away from him, trying to control waves of sobs that welled up inside her. Never did she think she would hear that from him, she had never expected it from him because she knew that was his way, but hearing it brought peace to insecurities she held onto. She placed her head on his shoulder, now quietly crying, and he stroked her hair for a few minutes.

"I missed you," she managed, halfway composing herself, halfway still crying, then finally composing herself. She sat up straight and looked at him, smiling through her last tears, then hastily wiping them away. "I don't think breaks are good for us. Let's not do that again."

"I agree, that was not healthy for the either of us… rather like your eating habits." He smirked and she hit him lightly on the shoulder, then kissed him on the cheek, working her way down to his neck, hitting a particularly sensitive spot. "Actually," he started, "I think a few things need to be changed around, such as, ack! Not there! ...sleeping arrangements. Your room is _impossibly_ bright; it's hardly a wonder you get insufficient sleep. Perhaps somewhere darker?" he said, his voice taking on a gruff, possessive manner.

"Such as your dungeon?" she asked, knowing the answer. She pushed him back on the bed seductively, barely hovering over him and taunting him with light kisses.

"Good suggestion."

"And you honestly think I'd get more sleep down there with you?"

"Not if I have my way, no."

She laughed. "Well, if it makes you happy, I'll go. I would start the arrangement now, but Madame Pomfrey would have my head." She kissed him passionately now, fingers deftly undoing the buttons down the front of his robes and taking his belt out of its loops, then kissing his chest.

"And you think she'd do any better to me? I believe I was threatened with boiling not to lay a hand on you before I even stepped into the classroom," he groaned.

"If she asks, we'll tell her it was the other way around," Cassi said with a smirk.

***

Later, both Cassi and Severus were under her covers, Cassi lying atop him with her head on his chest, and Severus supine on the pillow, stroking her hair with his eyes closed. He could feel her heart beating against him, and her breath on his skin. It was bliss.

"Oh Severus," she sighed, running her fingertips along his chest lightly, then pulling herself up so she was eye level to him. He opened his eyes and leaned up to kiss her.

"I like the way you say my name. Much better than that way you spat Snape at the beginning of the year," he said, resting back on the pillow and letting her prop herself up on her elbows, lips hovering over his.

She smiled. "If you had told me I would be sleeping with you by the end of the school year then, I probably would have slapped you and stomped off. Hmm," she looked amused now. "Who knew I'd be lucky enough to end up someone as handsome, clever, and sarcastic as you, eh?"

"Handsome? Now you cruelly jest."

"Hardly. I think you're very handsome," she said, and he snorted. "No, really!" She took her free hand that was not propping her head up and traced his features delicately with her fingertips, then kissing the place that coordinated with her speech. "You've got a noble forehead, which wrinkles cutely when you're angry," she started, and he made a face at the word 'cute' which made her giggle, but let her continue. "… And a distinguished nose… dark, mysterious eyes, which I find myself drowning in so very often… a mouth that's both cutting and ensnaring, with a tongue skilled in both sculpting words and… and…" she tried to finish her sentence, but was unable to as Severus pulled her down with his free hand and into a rough kiss, then turned over so she was the one looking up at him. "Kissing me senseless." 

He smirked at her and was just about to kiss her again when someone banged on the door. Both sighed loudly, and Cassi muttered, "Three guesses who."

"Professor Talin, I've got to give you your medicines now, and check up on you one last time," squawked Madame Pomfrey through the door.

"Um, can you come back later, Madame Pomfrey?" called Cassi, fidgeting slightly as Severus ran his fingers down her neck and shoulders, then traced the path with kisses.

"I suppose so, after dinner then, but- …Is Professor Snape still in there?!"

"No," called Cassi, smiling. "He's gone back to his dungeons." Then, to Severus, she added in a low voice, "Grr, stop it! You're going to get us caught!"

"Then who are you talking to?" asked the nurse with suspicion.

Cassi grimaced. "My mirror," she said loudly, clapping a hand to her mouth to stifle a moan.

"Well, alright, but you ought not talk to magical items, they aren't good conversing partners," said the nurse one last time, then the clicking of her shoes could be heard going down the short passage.

Cassi laughed when she was gone. "Severus Snape, we're going to get caught one day and I'll let YOU do the talking. I'd be interested to see how you explain it off."

"Fine then, I'd blame it on you though," he replied, not relinquishing his reign of kisses.

~

Finally, all was well. Cassi recovered from her illness, and did in fact move down to his room, though it took a bit for both to grow accustomed to living with someone else. Though both were hopelessly organized, they arranged things in different manners and had lived alone for all of their adult lives, so they were constantly picking things up and moving them to where they thought it ought to belong, sometimes causing disputes. However, they could never stay mad at the other for any notable amount of time, because fighting always seemed to end in kisses and caresses.

In this period of love and consistency, Darkness grew. The silence of the Dark side was over, and now their evil spread like poisonous fumes through the country. Killings of a most vile kind were reported daily in the newspapers, of both Muggle and magical, along with several kidnappings. Mangled and disfigured bodies were found in ditches, people dying in pools of blood in their homes; with all of these, the Dark Mark hovered above the scene, glistening green and shining, the very symbol of fear and pain. People began to leave the land, moving both east and west to seek shelter for themselves and their families. Not many students had left the school to go with their family, maybe a handful, but their absence resonated in the student's eyes of what was to come. The teachers kept the student's from worrying though by continuing on as normal, giving the students the stability they needed. All were reassured by Hogwart's impermeable walls, protected by the strongest forces of magic.

Terror struck outside the school, but inside, all members of the Defense meetings were trying to prevent it. Several were sent on missions, while others gathered information at their place of employment. Indeed, even Cassi and Severus had a task, given to them by Dumbledore just after she recovered.

He wished for them to go out to former Death Eaters that had appealed to Dumbledore to help them, for they supposedly did not wish to return. There were only a few who had done this, for the Dark Lord's power was terrible, but his revenge was even worse. It was Severus and Cassi's job to find and interview these people; they knew what to look for in a repentant Death Eater. During their break or on weekends once every couple weeks, they would go to the homes of those who had asked for help and interview them. They would question him or her for some time, asking about what they did after the Dark Lord fell and what they have been doing since the Dark Mark has begun burning. If they felt the person was sincere, they brought the person to Dumbledore later in the week by night, and he or she would testify under Veritaserum that their intentions were true.

The first person they went for proved to be weak and unstable, still delegating about what to do. They told him to think it over, and they would return later. The second person was stronger and more outspoken against the Dark side, and had already dodged a few attacks lead by some followers of Voldemort. All this proved to be true when he took the truth serum. However, their third person was false, a spy of Voldemort. Severus sensed this about halfway through the conversation, and cut the meeting short, saying they would have to come back later. As soon as they had left the house, Cassi had told Severus that the man was not to be trusted, and he agreed. When they told Dumbledore of their instincts, he agreed that this man seemed most shady. Danger had been avoided that day, but there would be more to come.

This task was sometimes strenuous to both of them, for it was much like living through those hard times again and coming face to face with those decisions all over. Indeed, Severus could tell that after each time they went, Cassi would come back subdued and thoughtful, and wouldn't talk about the experience until a few days later. On such occasions, Severus would let her alone to think it out.

After their third visit and failure, Cassi was particularly quiet. She hardly said a word at dinner, and stayed late in her classroom grading essays. Severus knew she would be back soon, so he stayed at his desk and worked; he had a few tests to finish grading anyway. Soon he became absorbed in his work, and did not notice that a few hours had ticked by before she came down to him. She opened the door wearily and walked over to him, placing a hand on his shoulder and watching. 

"Workaholic tendencies keeping you up?" he asked.

"It's the pot calling the cauldron black for you to say that," she smirked. He rolled up his last test and placed it in the neat pile of graded items, then stood.

"It's been a long day for both of us, let's go to sleep," he said, and she nodded and followed him to his room.

However, many hours later and in the early hours of the morning, Cassi awoke suddenly, clammy and breathing hard while sitting up in bed. She touched her gown to assure herself it was just a dream, and tried to calm down, running a hand through her hair and closing and reopening her eyes several times. Severus had woken up and sat up with her, looking at her knowingly.

"Nightmare?" he asked quietly.

"Yes… and no. It was both memory and nightmare… it was so real," she said bitterly.

"Of Death Eater days?"

"No… no, it was before then. Before all that."

"You rarely speak of such days."

"I know, and… and you ought to know, because you shared your story with me and yet I have told you nothing, though you haven't asked," she sighed, settling back under the covers and staring at the ceiling.

"I did not wish to impose…" he said, settling down next to her and leaning on his side. "However, I'm listening now." She kissed his arm and sighed, looking troubled.

"Alright, let's see… where to begin? Well, I was born and grew up in the forests near Moscow, away from the city but not particularly near anywhere else. My mother is from the area, but my father is British. Went to Hogwarts, actually. Anyway, there was a small village there, and we lived on the outskirts of it. I have four older sisters, and all four left the house as soon as they were eighteen. I also have a younger brother, and that's how this all started.

"Both my parents are magical, don't get me wrong, but my mother is Muggle born, and that somehow affected my sibling's magical ability, which normally doesn't happen, but can. My older sisters aren't very good with magic, but they can use it. They like to do things the Muggle way though; it seems easier to them. I was different though, because I had no problems with magic from a very early age, and proved to be quite skilled… but not my brother. He was born when I was eleven, and was a Squib, much to my parents' dismay. He, being the only male child, was supposed to stay with the house and land to keep it in the family name. Therefore, my parents made the decisions to ban magic from the house, so he could grow up without knowing of an easier life and knowing the Muggle ways.

"I despised my parents for doing this. They took my wand from me and hid it, convinced I could live like my sisters and brother, but I couldn't. I found my wand and practiced in secret. I learned from hidden spellbooks my dad had; he was a Ravenclaw, so many of his books were both Light and Dark. Light spells proved too easy to learn, but the Dark ones took time, time I was willing to spend. I lived like this for two years, until I was thirteen, and a stranger came to stay with us.

"He was a wanderer, on his way back to England but he needed a place to stay. I didn't care, for this happened often, so I worked in the forest as usual. I had never been caught practicing magic, but he found me in the forest that night, then revealed that he too was a wizard. He told me things of the wizarding world, and I knew that's where I wanted to be. He also spoke of a group he belonged to who was rising to power, and could use someone like me, for I was also skilled in knifework. He said all I would have to do was track the one they called He Who Must Not Be Named, and I would find them. Later that night, he Apparated off, and I never saw him again, but I had a goal then. Three years later, and totally sick of repression of my powers and endangered of being married off to a stupid Muggle boy, I ran away and searched for the Death Eaters and their Master for a year. You know my story from that point until I was executed…

After everyone had cleared, I woke up in the forest. An old hermit lady had snuck out and grabbed me, dragging me back to her house and saving me by casting a Blood Slowing spell on my wound. She was quite odd, I still don't think I've met anyone as bizarre as her. However, she insisted that she save me, for I reminded her of someone named Roberta that she loved to babble on about. When she saw my Mark, she knew what I was, and that I couldn't go back to either side, or either world… so she placed a Memory Charm on me, and then told me she found me in the forest with a nasty bump on my head. This was true, for Voldemort hit me with the scepter before he slashed my throat, so I believed her. She got me healthy again, and sent me to the nearest city. I worked odd jobs from then on, until I came here.

There's _my _story… I had a nightmare of it tonight. My parents had found me, they wanted me in Azkaban… everyone did." Cassi finished her story by looking away, but Severus pulled her close to him and kissed her cheek, then placed his arms around her.

"Why do you incessantly think I judge you for past experiences, when my past is as equally horrible as your own?" he whispered in her ear, and she shrugged. "I'm not _that_ unspeakably dreadful."

"I know you're not, not at all, it's just… I don't know," she said quietly, but she looked less troubled. He held her silently until she fell asleep, then began to drift off, all the while thinking of her complex story. He had been born into a family where his Dark magic was approved, though his parents did not care for him; she had had the opposite problem. _How strange it is that two people raised so differently came to be so much alike,_ he thought. He kissed her temple and surrendered to sleep.

When he awoke the next morning before dawn, a Wednesday morning, he found his bed empty, save himself. Sighing and shaking his head, he knew she was already in her classroom. He dressed quickly, only bothering with his appearance long enough to begrudgingly run a comb through his hair, then leaving his room with a swish of his robes.

Marching down the hallway as the first rays of light broke over the castle, he quickly found his way to her classroom. The halls were still cold with the morning chill, but they were no different than his dungeons in temperature, so he did not notice. He knocked once, then entered, finding Cassi at her desk, sorting through piles of paper. 

"Oh, Severus!" she said, looking up at him brightly. Her mood seemed greatly improved from last night. He walked over to her, standing behind her chair with his hands on her shoulders and staring at her parchments. She looked up at him by tilting her head far back, staring playfully up at him. 

"Perky this morning, aren't we? What happened to the downcast little girl?" he asked.

"Ha, she fell asleep in a wonderful man's arms and woke up there."

"I certainly hope he's me, lest I be very angry and disappointed," he said in his own playful manner; a serious sounding voice with a smirk floating on his lips. He stepped to the side of her chair, her eyes following him.

"Snape, you are a silly jealous man!"

"And you love every bit of my jealousy."

"Hm, you caught me. And of course he's you," she said, watching him as he bent over and kissed her, lips and tongue meeting his eagerly, soon feeling his fingertips lightly gliding over her neck. She let him stay like this for a second, then jerked away. "Ok ok ok, you're flustering me, now shove off so I can finish my work."

"Fine then," he said, trying to sound put off. "I suppose you'll be in my dungeons begging for more at break, then."

She did not look up from her work, but smiled and replied dryly, "You're _so _overconfident. Right, I'll meet you in Frozen Hell later during break, as I promised Hagrid I would walk with him around the grounds." She heard the door open and shut, then grinned broadly, hugged herself, and continued to work. Later she picked up and went to breakfast, catching him as she entered. They greeted each other in a formally cold manner, then walking past as if they hadn't seen the other; this was their way of things.

Breakfast was finished soon enough, and Cassi's first two classes ran smoothly and without notability, except one thing: Harry was absent from first period. When she asked Hermione and Ron where he was after class, they said he had gone to take a walk before breakfast, then to go see Dumbledore. She understood this to be a private matter between Potter and Dumbledore, so she nodded understandingly and let them go on to Potions class.

When break did finally come, Cassi went without her cloak (as the April sun had thawed Hogwarts out slightly, and the rains had cleared for that day) to the Entrance Hall, watching the stones that passed under her feet with interest, and finally arriving at the large Hall.

"'Ello there, ready ta go?" asked the large man, beetle black eyes twinkling kindly.

"Of course Hagrid," she said, taking up her place at his side. "Listen, I'm sorry about not visiting you lately, I've had a lot to think about and, while I know that's hardly an excuse, it just seemed to get to me." He pushed the door open for her, all the while nodding his wild haired head.

"Don' think 'bout it, I unerstan' how them things go. Sumtimes it's jus' easier ta be alone an' think 'bout things. Don' you worry yourself now," he said genially, watching her step back to shut the great wooden doors. However, she froze as the door creaked shut, for on the outside of the wood was an ornate, old dagger stabbed through the middle of a piece of parchment. Hagrid stared at it, as did she, before she grabbed the knife by the handle and pulled it out, then caught the parchment.

"Oh my God," she breathed. All color drained from her face, and she read the note over a few times. Suddenly, she looked up commandingly. "Hagrid, go get the Headmaster and Severus immediately, I'm going to fetch McGonagall away from her class."

"Was' 'appened?!" he asked, alarmed by her tone and composure.

"Harry has been kidnapped. Go get the others, tell them to meet us in the Entrance Hall at once," she said, placing the knife in her sash along with the rolled up parchment. Hagrid gaped for a split second, eyes full of worry, then flung open the doors and barreled down the hall. She followed him a few steps, then dashed off up the stairs and to the left, while he stayed on the main floor, going to get Severus first.

***

The five of them met in the Entrance Hall in less than five minutes, all out of breath. Cassi hurriedly pulled the scroll out of her sash and read it out loud.

"Dumbledore," she said, reading off the paper. "Have you lost one of your precious students? This shall never do; lucky for you he stumbled into our midst. We have a few things to discuss with the young Potter boy, so he has come with us. Don't count on seeing him again, alive that is. Hopefully this will teach you to keep your nose out of our business, and into your own, for you have two of our kind in your employment. They are next, for the Dark Lord finishes all business." She stopped and looked up at everyone. "It's signed with the Dark Mark," she said slowly.

Dumbledore looked around the group with a commanding power radiating from him, and all were immediately obedient. "Minerva, go to your Commons and search for the boy there, in case this is a bluff, though I doubt it. Then order the students to their Commons, Heads of Houses stationing themselves inside the Commons to watch their students. Have Sinistra take over for Severus. Filch is to stand guard over the doors. Hagrid, you're going with Severus and Cassandra to walk the grounds. Find something that will lead us in the right direction. I have to Apparate to the old crowd, where Sirius is hiding out. The spies will help us track him down, and Sirius needs to be told his godson in missing."

"Albus, who are the two in our school the note speaks of?" asked McGonagall quickly.

"Me," said Severus and Cassandra at the same time. She gave Severus a knowing look, but was slightly shocked at Cassi, though quickly masked it. She then turned around and ran off in the direction of the Gryffindor Commons. Dumbledore, Snape, Hagrid and Talin all ran out the front door, Albus splitting from the group to stay on the path that would lead him out of the grounds, and the rest turned to walk the edge of the forest, where he likely disappeared. The wind was chilly though not cold, and the sun gleamed brightly overhead. Suddenly the day's innocence seemed to be mocking them, taunting them.

They paced the edge of the forest, hoping and praying that there might be some sign of struggle, some sign of something. Hagrid combed inside the forest, while the other two walked outside of it, watching the grass and branches for something. When Cassi fell back a step, Hagrid asked her curiously, "Yer a Death Eater?"

"Was, Hagrid. I was a long time ago," she replied simply. He stopped and patted her shoulder, then moved ahead a few paces until he gave a whooping yell.

"Look 'ere," he said, and in his giant palm was the Hogwarts crest patch, torn off a student's robe. Cassi picked it up, looked at it, and handed it to Severus.

"Good boy, Harry, good boy," she whispered. "Alright, someone will need to go to the front gate and wait for Dumbledore to return, then show him the way here, while the other two look around for anything else. Hagrid, would you be wi-" As Cassi was finishing up her suggestion, she was pulled down to the ground by a man in black robes who had jumped from a tree. Likewise, Severus was pulled down as well by another man, but Hagrid would not fall so easily. Hagrid picked the man off his shoulders and threw him against a tree, killing the man instantly.

"Kill the big guy, bring the other two!" came a cry from another man, as about five more rushed into the battle. Cassi drew her wand and knife while still trapped beneath the man, and plunged the knife into his leg, sending him falling to the side, howling. Hagrid was fighting off two more men before they could draw their wands, while both Severus and Cassi fought to free themselves. Severus ended up cursing the man off of him, then stood and helped Cassi up from the grappling, bleeding man next to her. Almost immediately they were knocked backwards to the ground with curses, but she struggled to stand again, body aching with the force of the attack and hair falling out of her braid and into her face.

"Hagrid!" she screamed, turning to her friend as she spied a figure in black skulking towards him behind his back. "Hagrid, watch out behind you!" 

Before Hagrid had the chance to turn and see his assailant, the man flicked his wand powerfully and screamed, "_AVADA KEDAVRA_!" Hagrid dropped where he stood in a second, body hitting the ground with a loud thud. Both Severus and Cassi gawked for a split second, then sprung back into the fight, now fending off six men. She struggled with one, threw him to the ground, but was slammed to the ground by another one when he struck her a blow to her back. 

"_Ablegare_!" shouted Severus, sending the man who had felled Cassi flying backwards with a blue ball of light. It was too late though, for the remaining four men tackled him to the ground as soon as the spell left his wand, quickly binding his hands behind his back with rope and taking his wand, then spelling the rope to make it indestructible. He was then blindfolded and another enchanted rope was wound around his neck and tied, making a leash. He struggled with the ropes and the men, making it hard to bind him, but in the end he was taken, still pinned to the ground.

"Severus, so nice to see you again," said a voice above him. He turned his head as if to look at the person. "Would someone gag him please? There's something I want him to see." Immediately, he felt another piece of cloth wrapped around his mouth tightly, making it impossible to yell. His blindfold was taken off, and he saw three masked men standing around him, one hobbling back to the group, and two binding Cassi, who was already gagged but struggling and fighting the entire time. One of the men binding her slapped her hard, rendering her motionless for a few seconds while she tried to orient herself again. "Fiery girl, isn't she?" started the masked man above him again in a dangerous, slippery voice. "I would hate to see her end up like your rather large friend over there, because I _do_ have permission to kill her, as long as I bring back her body. If you try and escape, she will be killed and we will execute her in front of your eyes. Got it?" Severus looked up at the man with pure hatred. "Same goes for you girl, we'll kill the professor if you try to run off too!" Cassi looked up blindly, unable to see anything, then looked away. Severus was blindfolded again.

"You there," said the man, now sounding authoritative. "Keep those wands away from them, though oughtn't pose a problem now. Wands will be of little help where they're going." The man chuckled malevolently into the cool breeze, then kicked Severus in the side hard, but he could do nothing, as the threat of harm to Cassi was ever present. They were forced to stand and walk, though they did not know where.

*~*~*

This is the end. This is also the part where you review ;)


	9. Wait for Me

****

Author's Note: Ha! See? I took less than three months… I took two. Shush shush, I tried. I got a snow day so I had the chance to work on it allll yesterday. It turned out a little long, but I think it's an ok chapter. You might have to read the last part of my last chapter to remember where we are. I know I said this chapter would be short, and it is short_er,_ but it's 28 pages….yeah. Shush. DAH! Big thanks to my editor, she's awesome, I'll probably have a ramblefest about her in my epilogue.

Yup, still don't own anyone except Cassi and Donovan, and even then I'm not making any money, so support your starving artist with the one thing she feeds off of, reviews! Yes dearies, review or I'll majorly delay writing, and I don't think you want that after this chapter. Oh yeah, and I figured out a way to prolong the ending process, so there are two more chapters to come after this, and an epilogue… I hope to get this done before Book 5.

Ok, this chapter I would go ahead and say is R, but not for the usual reasons. Lots of violence, and if you get queasy at the reading of blood, um…. Skim over it? This chapter is important, but bloody. If anyone whines, don't say I didn't warn you, because you can stop right now. Ok, read and review! *glare* Or else…. ;) 

Chapter 9: Wait for Me

They walked. For hours it seemed that they trudged through the forest blindly, led roughly by their assailants. Dead leaves crunched under their feet as they marched, and the scent of the forest became mustier and staler as they neared its heart. Tree roots stumbled Severus and Cassi, sometimes causing them to topple over entirely, choking as the leashes around their necks were pulled suddenly to keep them from running off. This only gave way to being kicked in the side, for the kidnappers seemed startled every time they fell, as if half expecting a well-planned attack.

"Don't you think this is far enough?" whined one of the men to Severus' left. 

"No, the Light side has the advantage of knowing the forest. We'll go until we get into the oldest part of the woods, then Apparate," instructed the leader in a cruel voice. 

Cassi walked with her head hung, thinking hard. An old feeling crept over her; suddenly she was tracking the positions of the people near her in her mind, listening to them and guessing their weaknesses. Strategies ran through her mind, several ways of escaping were half plotted out already, if it were not for the one looming fact that Severus would be killed the moment she so much as stepped out of line. She believed he was more than capable of escaping as well, but knew that he was holding himself back for her. Self-disgust rose within her heart; how she wished he would just save himself and let her fate play out. Angry, she growled to herself, though the leader heard her.

"Something wrong Ms.… what are you calling yourself? Talin?" asked the leader in a silky but confidently smug voice. A second later, she felt her gag untied, and she bit her lip to regain feeling in her mouth, which now tingled as the blood ran back to her flesh.

"Talin, yes. And no sir," she started darkly, her civility punctuated with venom, though she looked off at him blindly, "I was just growling because I can't decide whether I'm going to kill you or the guy next to me first."

"That's big talk for someone who's tied up," said the guy next to her who was holding her rope.

She turned her head to him, though she could not see. Immediately, she felt his fear, and knew that her reputation preceded her. "And that's a lot of confidence for someone as young as yourself. What are you, 24, 25? You don't know what you're dealing with, child."

"…oh yeah?" he said, trying to sound less scared. She heard him pull out his wand and take a step back, the leaves crunching beneath his reluctant feet. He dropped her rope in his fear.

She smiled at him briefly, more like a smirk than a gesture of kindness. In the next second, she jumped up high while pulling her knees up to her chest, then brought her hands (which were tied behind her back at the wrists) under her jump so they were now in front of her. Before the young man could react, she stepped forward and clubbed him in the side of the head with her bound hands, knocking him senseless to the ground. "Yeah," she spat at the figure on the ground. She then looked towards the leader. "Leave me ungagged, and ungag the professor as well. We're not going to scream like little school children."

"Very well," said the leader reluctantly, though still sounding smug. She heard a man move to Severus and ungag him, and then revive the boy on the ground. "Only about a half mile more and we'll be to the Apparating point," he announced, and then added in a lower voice to one of his brethren in Darkness, "Watch the girl." Cassi felt the boy tug her rope hard and she began walking again.

All the while, Severus was thinking hard as well. He knew he could escape, and he knew she was capable of escaping, but neither would risk the danger it would put the other in. Knowing there was no way, then, to escape now, he decided they would make plans at their destination. If his assumptions were correct, Potter would be at the same place, and they could free him as well. Even if he was not partial to the overly famous, smugly confident boy who tried to blackmail him earlier that year, he still had a moral obligation to find him and bring him back, seeing as he was the child's teacher. As dangerous as it was, it was now his job to make sure both went back to Hogwarts safely... with or without him.

~

Harry Potter awoke to a cold stone floor pressed to his cheek. Quickly, he sat up by pushing himself up from the grimy floor and adjusted his glasses, becoming aware of the chained shackles he had on his wrists as they rattled with his movement. The lines of his world became crisp as his glasses moved and his eyes focused, and he now looked upon his prison.

He was in a dungeon, dimly lit by torches along the old stone walls. The rectangular rocks the walls and floor were composed of were worn and greening, giving him the impression that wherever he was, it was an old place of residence. The dungeon room wasn't particularly big, roughly two Hogwarts classrooms put together in all, but the darkness of the room made the shadowy corners seem endless. Vaguely could he see two other cages of metal bars like his own on the other side of the room, side by side, as if patiently waiting for their inhabitants. A single chair stood between his cell and the other two, one with arms and shackles on it. It seemed ominous as to what his fate would be.

Sitting back against the wall, he sighed and pulled his legs up to his chest. Just this morning he had been perfectly fine, walking outside the walls of his school to clear his mind. Now he had no idea what time it was, and he had a bruise on the side of his head, a token of his struggle with the assailant in black from that morning. Though he had yet to see anyone (besides an older man sleeping in a chair in the corner), he knew what this was about… Voldemort. Harry knew Voldemort had grown in strength, and so he knew he could not battle him. Instead, he would have to make an escape, though his prospects looked bleak, as chained as he was and without his wand. _This is the end of your luck, _he thought to himself. He had known all along that he couldn't cheat death forever, and there was only so many times that he could run and escape the Dark Lord's grasp. Just as he was beginning to accept this fact with a depressed but determined heart, he heard a series of noises and raised voices coming from near the door. Lifting his head up, he watched and waited.

Two men flung the heavy wooden door of the dungeon open, leading in a group of people all clad in black. Harry was completely shocked when he saw his Potions Master and Defense professor amidst the group, blindfolded, dirty, with bound hands. Their faces looked resolute and stern, and did not show any sign of weakness as they were marched over to the two steel cages, blindfolds removed, and shoved into their cells, the doors creaking shut and rattling the cage as it was slammed.

"There, they're in. Go inform McCleland and Malfoy that they have arrived, and I shall go speak with the Master," Harry heard one man say to another, obviously the leader to his assistant. Both men disappeared through the dungeon door, and four more men followed them, not really knowing what to do now.

"Harry?" Talin whispered to him from across the room. The man in the corner (obviously a guard, though a rather pathetic excuse for one) snorted in his sleep, then went back to snoring softly.

"Yes Professor?" he answered her, making sure to keep his voice low.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes, I just woke up."

He heard her murmur a praise to Merlin. "We'll figure something out," she said reassuringly to him, and he nodded in a hopeful manner.

~

Cassi looked over to Severus after she had finished conversing with Harry. Severus looked battered, his black hair mussed with dirt smudging his face and a cut on his cheek. She was sure she looked just as bad, if not worse, for her sides already ached from the kicks she had received.

"Severus," she said softly. He looked up at her, his gaze turning from the floor to her eyes. She smiled faintly and took a step towards him. "Press your back to the bars and I'll loosen the ropes on your hands," she offered, and he did so. With bindings still wrapped tight over her wrists, though in front of her, she used her fingers to loosen his tightly woven ropes, revealing livid red burns winding around his own wrists.

"Mm, thanks," he said with a grimace as the burns were being rubbed against the ropes again. He turned around to face her so their faces were barely three inches from the others, peering through the bars. 

"I don't like the fact that our cells are adjoined… it's a mark of arrogance that we won't break out no matter how perfect our conditions are," she said grimly.

"Pride goeth before a fall, their pride will be their mistake. We're escaping regardless."

"Any plans though? I think one well placed kick in the guard's throat and he won't be yelling for help anytime soon…" she said, sneering over at the guard as she glanced over at him.

"Cells first Cassi, then house."

"I work my plans out in reverse."

"Backwards. How typical of you."

"Forwards. How predictable. How you."

"I'll win this argument with you later," he said impatiently, though somehow comforted by the fact that she was still willing to argue with him. "We need a wand or a key, and the rest is running and Apparating."

"We'll have to run for awhile, we didn't Apparate directly here; we walked after Apparating, which means this ground is hidden. And don't forget we're in a building full of Death Eaters, which we must go past unnoticed. I'm assuming this is headquarters, but for all I know this could simply be a branch… why haven't we noticed Dark activity here before though?" she asked, deeply disturbed by this fact.

"If it is hidden, than it won't show up on our Darkness Map," he said, looking around the room. She looked pensively at the floor.

"Then the Defense group can't see us to rescue us, and the odds of running and making it aren't…. favorable," she said, and he nodded once. The dungeon door slammed open again and Cassi and Severus stepped apart, standing decisively, as if holding their ground.

A large, red man dressed in black with his hood down walked pompously into the room. Sneering, he looked around at everyone in the cages, and then locked eyes with Cassi. He stormed over to her cell purposefully, standing just out of arms reach. "So," he said. "This is the face of the Killer? I'd always had you figured as a hag the way you hid under that hood."

Cassi did not retort, but stood stiffly before him with dignity.

"Silence eh? My my, you would think that they would teach you manners in that goody-goody society as well; speak when spoken to." More silence. "Apparently not so. Of course, some things never change, isn't that right?"

"No, I suppose they don't, for I see that you are still overconfident, prideful, and a distasteful maroon when you're nervous," she replied coldly, unable to keep her silence a second longer. _Damn pride._

He laughed mockingly. "So the dirty tramp does still have a tongue in her head! …Probably puts it to use too, no doubt," he said whilst eyeing Severus, then directed his next comment to him. "Well, does she?"

"How dare you!? Take a step forward, coward, and repeat it," she answered hotly, eyes flashing with a look that could have incinerated him in her anger.

"No thank you, I'd rather not."

"Dirty, filthy, red little man, you'd sooner run from your own shadow than take that one step forward. You're the largest vermin I've ever had the displeasure to lay eyes on," she hissed quietly, pressing her face between the bars to glare at him with seething eyes.

The already red man grew even more brilliantly scarlet, and stepped forward angrily. She launched her hands out and grasped his cloak in her free fingers, and slammed him against the metal bars of her cage face forward, hitting his skull squarely on the bars. He swore vehemently, and caught her wrists, twisting both arms until she was forced to kneel to avoid their breaking.

"That's quite enough!" shouted a cool voice from the doorway, and her arms were released, letting her sit back and flex her fingers until the feeling returned, then looked to the door. There, in the light of the torches, stood the tall, lean figure of Lucius Malfoy. Lucius was, and had always been, a thin man with the gift of rhetoric, offset by his respectable and noble features, along with his old wizarding blood. Cassi stood, observing Severus tensing as Lucius slowly walked into the room, cane in hand, tapping it along the floor as he walked. "Dear me, McCleland, save your temper. Remember, you'll have them for playing with later," he announced lazily, then stopped at Severus' bars, the two faces very close, both calm, both pairs of eyes seething hatred. "He's been put in charge of torture, you see."

"Lucius Malfoy," said Snape rigidly.

"Severus Snape," he answered. "So how goes life at Hogwarts? Or went, I should say. Were you happy hiding in the shadows of the twit Dumbledore? Protected by his wings, like a small chick to its mother hen?"

"How's the Ministry work? Stabbed anyone else in the back of late, or corrupted any more files? I do know how you like that," answered Severus.

"As a matter of fact, just this morning I destroyed three files of evidence against two Death Eaters, and had one official assassinated. I'm having a rather fine day, though I don't suppose you are…. Ropes, how primitive. Shocking, this maltreatment is," said the long haired, blonde wizard, voice dripping in pride and mockery.

"Yes well, there are certain expectations one has in being kidnapped; and I expected no less," he drawled boredly.

"Indeed. Oh, one last question, how's young Draco doing? I haven't had the time to owl him yet this week," said Malfoy, though his tone gave away that it was not fatherly concern that made him ask the question, but business.

"I'm sure he's just fine, pleased as ever that his father has his teachers captive," replied Severus, looking as if he'd lost all interest in the conversation.

"Ah, good boy. You know, it's truly astounding what one learns from school gossip… wouldn't you agree Anya?" Lucius asked, now turning from Severus and taking a step over to Cassi, who was not flexing her fingers now, but standing stiffly before the bars. "Oh, I am mistaken… you go by eh, Cassandra Talin, do you not?"

"Yes, I do, Lucius Malfoy," she answered, tone hard.

"It's been a very long time."

"Indeed it has." He paused after she said this, studying her face and height, then taking a hand off his cane and reaching through the bars to stroke a bit of hair out of her smudged face. Immediately, she flinched at his touch and drew back slightly. Severus stood, staring.

"So lovely, as ever. And we still don't like people to touch us, do we?" he said, his fingertips floating off her hair and traveling down her cheek, down her neck, then retracting to grip a bar of her cell. All the while, her face read murder and she closed her eyes and gritted her teeth in attempts not to lash out and break every bone in his body she could reach.

"Don't touch me again. Ever," she spat through clenched jaws. His eyes grew dark and he snatched a fistful of her robes and yanked her against the bars hard, so she was barely centimeters from him. She could feel his hot breath on her lips and she narrowed her eyes at him, anger flaring.

"You never used to mind me," he hissed with mirthless laughter hiding in his voice.

"I always minded you, and you know it. It drove you crazy. You went mad to trying to have me as your own, but you _failed_," she hissed back, a cruel smile appearing on her lips. "You were too craven."

"You'll find that you underestimated my boldness," he said in a deadly whisper.

"I doubt I did," she replied, amused. His grip on her tightened, and his cane clattered to the floor as both arms wove through the bars to pull her against them, one arm holding her in an odd embrace, while the other grasped hair at the back of her head, rendering her without control. She yelped in panic. He then leaned forward with an evil smirk and kissed her roughly, drawing it out with a passion. Long moments passed before she made another sound of panic in her throat, and moved bound hands to his chest in attempts to push him away. The second she sought for release though, he threw her down, and she fell back, hitting the ground hard, then laying there still even after her impact.

"You are to be tortured in less than an hour's time, enjoy your last minutes on this earth, you miserable wench. Severus, I always knew you had bad tastes, but I never thought you'd sink as low as this dirty slut," he said stiffly, with refinement while he picked up his cane and left the dungeon. Two pairs of steps left the room at a brisk pace, and with the slam of the wooden door it was back to the three prisoners and the guard. Cassi still lay on the stone, heat-forsaken floor, shaking, and Severus stood at the bars that they shared, grasping them tight with white knuckles, as he had been during her whole interview.

Finally calming herself enough to speak, she crawled over to where Severus stood and leaned against the bars in defeat. He crouched and stared at her blankly. "I. Hate. Him," she said, and he noticed she was still trembling.

"Why didn't you struggle?" asked Severus, sounding hardened and bitter. She snapped her eyes up to his when she caught his tone.

"What? You think… oh God Severus please," she begged, leaning her bowed head against the bars. "No please don't think that. I learned long ago that it's better not to struggle. Please understand, believe me-"

"I do," he said, his tone softening some. He knew she knew he was a jealous one, and she suspected it had hurt him to watch that as much as it had hurt her to experience it. She reached out her hands and placed them on his own. Immediately he looked at her strangely as she pressed something hard into his hand.

Removing his hand from hers, he looked down at his palm, where there lay a silver, shining key. "It's your or Harry's cell key, my padlock is a different metal," she whispered, "I had my reasons to come in contact with the both of them. Think not the less of me."

"I never do," he said, kissing her quickly. "I only really needed the key, the guard has a wand. If we hurry-" But his sentence was cut off, for the door had opened once more, and it was not Malfoy or McCleland that shadowed the doorway. It was a man taller and thinner than both, a man still cloaked though indoors, a man who cast shadows. It was Voldemort.

~

Severus looked back at Cassi's face quickly to see the color drain from it and the fear flash in her eyes. He sensed the fear that servitude inflicted on her pour from her eyes and posture. However, it was masked quickly, and she stood as he did.

"Cassandra, if he asks, deny me," he whispered quickly to her, his eyes set with resolute.

"I can not," she replied.

"Do it."

The black figure walked not to their side of the room, but to Harry's. Both adults seemed to be watching over him from across the room, while looking quickly back at each other. "The famous Harry Potter," hissed the man in a cold, high-pitched voice. "How nice to see you again, and under lock and key." Harry, who had watched horrified when Malfoy and the other man had come in to converse with his teachers, took a leaf out of their book and stood quietly, saying nothing but looking venomous. "So the impudent brat is caught at last, and on the grounds of Hogwarts for the second time! This ought to make waves in the community, for you know how I enjoy public chaos. This is the last time you'll be captured though… it won't be physically possible once I'm done with you to run away again." A cruel smile grew on the skeletal face of the man. "I also wish to send my condolences to you for the loss of your oaf of a friend, Rubeus Hagrid."

"What?" asked Harry, breaking his silence.

"Oh, have you not heard? That is most tragic, let me inform you then. Your half-giant friend is dead, he interfered with the plans to bring back your two teachers, so he naturally had to be disposed of," he said, feigning pity in a most malicious manner.

"No," breathed Harry.

"Yes! He was out looking for _you _when he met his death. Looking with the professors, who will die too, though that's only partly your fault. Severus Snape and Anya Virtov die for being traitors," he said, turning his stance to gesture between the two, but he looked back fast enough to catch the puzzled look on Harry's face. With cool delight, the Dark Lord gestured for two guards who had come in with him to unlock her and bring her to him. Somewhat nervously, they walked to her cell, unlocked it, and each grabbed her arm, walking with her to the other side of the room. She did not struggle, but walked with her head up confidently. When she was led to his side, they forced her to kneel by pushing hard on her shoulders until she fell to her knees, sitting back on her heels.

"Nice to see you again, Servant Anya," said the voice of her former master, causing her to flinch as if a whip had been brought down over her shoulders.

"I can not say the same for you," she said with bitterness.

"Of course you can't, you've renounced your old ways, haven't you?" he said, voice smothered in evil, sly glee. "You see Harry, Anya, your Professor Talin, was one of my best Death Eaters when she was just a little older than you. She came straight from the taiga of Russia to me here in England, hoping to fulfill her dream of belonging to the Dark side."

Harry looked over at her, his trust in her beginning to waver. She had been so outspoken against the Dark side, but this revelation brought doubt to him. He had had many teachers whom he believed to be good that turned out to be the agents of the Dark Lord, so why should she be any different? His only trust (and this was quite a surprise to him when his mind unveiled this) lay in the fact that Professor Snape had such confidence in her, for after his fifth year, it had finally become clear to him that Snape was indeed a member of the Light side, his side. He was still a greasy haired git with some serious anger management problems though.

"You look startled Harry, didn't expect to have yet another Death Eater as a teacher? That brings your grand total up to four, doesn't it? Quirrel, Crouch, Talin and Snape; how very ironic. You look so astounded, perhaps you had better _sit down_," he said, his voice turning to a growl. As he commanded Harry to sit, the boy felt a huge weight appear on his shoulders, and he crumbled to the ground, though sitting up as soon as the weight had passed. "Now, Anya, the boy has a right to know about his teacher, so break the news to him. Go on…. Well? You won't do it? Then I shall.

"She was my assasin from the very beginning. She alone is responsible for over a hundred Muggle and wizard deaths. My favorite, I chose her as my pet, and a good pet she was; calm, obedient and clever, the best I had. However, I soon suspected her of corruption in loyalties, and executed her. Through my own arrogance she survived, but conveniently forgot everything. And how convenient it was, until Severus was so good as to remind you. _Do you deny it_?" he asked, directing his last question to her. 

"I… do not," she said, and hung her head, but looked back up, pleading. "Harry, I made a mistake when-"

"Silence, Servant!"

"When I came into his service. It was the my worst decision."

Voldemort sneered and pulled a metallic scepter from his pocket, then waved it once in front of her. Tremors waved over her at the sight of the weapon, and she hung her head, but her mind raced. She knew that weapon all too well, she had been struck down with it quite often when she was young, though it was different than she remembered. At the end of it was an orb, the color of it a swirling navy blue and deep purple, which had definitely never been there before. The Dark Lord waved his hand in Harry's direction, and the boy fell unconscious in an instant. This was a very strange occurrence, because Voldemort was not supposed to have all his old power back yet, yet his abilities showed he had acquired it.

"Come back to the Light side, did you? I should have run you through with my blade instead of slitting your throat," he growled now at her. "Foolish Anya, thinking you can deceive yourself into believing you've become _good_. You know you were meant for our side, you will _never_ be able to renounce us, and you shall pay for your infidelity to your cause!" He twisted the shaft of the scepter and a knife blade sprung from the end, a shiny silver extension on the weapon. For a moment, she thought he was going to finish her off right then, and she awaited the blow with neither movement nor words, yet seconds passed and she remained unharmed. Instead, she felt him grab up her long black braided hair in his fist and cut it cleanly with the blade, then holding what was cut off in his hand and laughing in a low voice. She looked up at him blankly, and watched as her silken long black hairs catch fire and disintegrated into nothing. He put the scepter back into his pocket.

Grabbing her robes in the back, he stood her up roughly. Then, he took his wand from his belt and drew an oval in the air which glistened yellow, then formed a mirror, wild fingers of electricity spurting across the glassy surface at random intervals. Reluctantly, Cassi reached forth and grabbed the mirror with both hands, looking into it to see her eighteen-year-old self staring back at her, smudged in dirt and with shorter black hair. Her eyes were wide and horror struck in the mirror, staring up at her in disbelief, as she was sure she looked at the moment. So much pain and sorrow filled those eyes that she felt a wound in her heart reopen, but she watched the picture change subtly to her current image, so strikingly similar from the last one. She felt herself gripping the mirror tightly, bolts of electricity shooting around her hand. The image threw its head back and laughed mirthlessly, then glowed a brilliant red, flaring in heat and color until she gasped and dropped it. The mirror fell and shattered on the stone floor, and the shards immediately melted into tears of silver, then boiled and evaporated.

"I am not that," she stated in alarm to the vanishing mirror, shutting her eyes tight.

"Oh, but you are," he said quickly in a low voice. She felt a warm, round touch under her chin and realized it was the end of the fearsome scepter. He lifted her face to him, and her hands balled into fists for protection or preparation of pain. He noticed her interest in the orb and bared his teeth in a malicious grin.

"Do you like the addition? Dumbledore would love this, it makes his task that much more interesting. This, my dear, is a Power Crystal. Hard enough to come by, but we manage. It restored me to my full power, with new capabilities. Not only does it do that but also it has provided me with strength enough to shield this house with a charm to hide it from _your_ Darkness Map. I don't need silly Light side saints swarming my fortress, and the Crystal prevents that." He smirked and turned the scepter over in his hand to admire the orb, then lashed out and struck her across the cheek with it, burning her skin and throwing her painfully down against the floor.

"I may die today at your hands, but my side will remain. And I will die _Light_," she hissed quietly as she pushed herself from the floor, spitting blood.

Voice raised in sick excitement and mounting anger, he said to her, "Look at you Anya! You cannot change what you are! You are pathetic and weak, lowly and without a cause. Nothing, you are _nothing, _and you will die as nothing. Guard! Pull dear Severus out of his cell and let's see what we make of them. Collect McCleland and Malfoy as well." 

Cassi sat there on the ground, spirit slowly cracking as she realized the impossibility of the situation. Even if they were to escape, no one would ever find this place again, and the cycle would be repeated. The best they could do was to try to make it out alive. Wiping the blood from her lips, she looked up to see Severus taken out of the cell by the awoken guard and dragged out to the middle of the room, standing bravely. Voldemort walked to him, then paced around him.

"I see you've done well for yourself. You have a stable job, you're highly respected from what I hear, and you've also got that dirty brat at your beck and call. Almost like your father," said the man in a cruel voice, though it sounded offhand. Severus stared him level in the eye, face blank but every curve in it as if chiseled in stone. "Don't pretend not to listen, for I know you are hanging on my every word! Yes, you remind me of your father. He craved power as well, and sought me for it. Once given to him, he became even more of a tyrant, but he was my steadiest man. He wanted you to be trained up like him, and despite your best efforts, you become him more every day. Obviously your strict and detached upbringing worked well."

"My father was nothing more than a man with a temper and a thirst for what he didn't have," Severus stated plainly. Cassi was watching this from her side of the room now standing shakily, sometimes stepping forward in concern for Severus. He had never spoken long on the subject of his upbringing, but it had impacted him as hers had. 

"And what are you? Are you not the Potions master who flies into rages over Potter and his friends? Did you not want Anya because you could not have her? What evidence do you have that you are any better?" growled Voldemort, acutely aware that everything he said was deeply effecting them. Stepping back, he smirked. "Yes. Think about it, Severus. Anya, come. I said for you to _come_," he hissed. His last sentence made Cassi feel as if ropes were tied around her and drawing her to him, an overpowering force. He grabbed her with is long arms and pulled her against himself, so she was facing Severus from inside the Dark Lord's arms. She struggled for a moment as she felt pain seep into her skin as if coming from his very aura, but found it useless. He was cold and thin, though his strength crushing and his evil detectable through the mere touch.

"You see? You just thought to yourself that you needed her back, because it was not your arms she was in. Ah, yes, I can read you like an open book." He sneered. "Guard, I want you to remove Severus' bindings and put him in the chair," he said in a cold voice. Fearfully, the guard approached Severus, removed his ropes from his chafed wrists, and pushed him back into the chair. With as much dignity as he could muster, Severus placed his own arms on the arms of the chair, the metal clamps slamming themselves over his wrists. Shackles at the bottom of the chair clamped to his ankles. The guard then gagged him again. Voldemort arrested Cassi's shoulder and pushed her forward until she was half a meter from Severus, then was once again forced to kneel. "You forget procedure, Anya. You always kneel when prompted to or in my presence."

Cassi looked up at Severus through her shorn hair that fell against her face, her eyes trying to read his. She wanted so badly to be the one in the chair and not him.

Voldemort observed them quietly, then chuckled and began. "How sentimental. Tell me, Anya, how long have you been working at Hogwarts? Lie and he shall be the one to feel your sin's retribution."

"Roughly over seven months," she replied simply, looking at the ground.

"And how long did you know the professor before he told you that you were formally under my command?"

"Six."

"Hmm, peculiar. He must have suspected before this… Did Dumbledore know before Severus?"

"No."

"The old fool is becoming dim then, how delightful. You attend Defense meetings with him, don't you? Donovan overheard someone speak of one once."

She did not say anything. If he was going to pump information from them while messing with their minds, she would not have it.

"Silence confirms you. Who attends them?"

Silence.

"We have suspects, let me list them: Dumbledore, the five teachers McGonagall, Hagrid, Flitwick, Snape and yourself, Lupin (a former teacher), Fletcher, Black (surprisingly enough), and Smith and Hall of the Ministry. As for the rest, it's only a matter of time to learn their names." Voldemort reached down and patted her head, the gesture cruel and sickening, much as a twisted owner would a cat. "You are quite the loyal pet, aren't you?"

"I am no one's pet," she replied bitterly, jerking away from his touch.

"You are his, are you not?" said Voldemort, maliciousness mounting in his voice as he gestured to Severus with the wave of his hand.

Cassi looked up slowly from the ground, looking meaningfully at Severus to indicate that she would heed him and deny their relations. "No. I belong to no one."

"You cannot deny that you are on intimate terms with him. Donovan wrote to me about his escapade in the hall with you, and Malfoy's boy confirms it, and also adds that he once found the two of you in his dungeons under suspicious circumstances," he stated in sophisticated evil glee.

"Your sources are a novice Death Eater and a teenage boy? Has the Dark Lord sunk so low, is he truly that desperate?" she hissed, turning her head to look defiantly up at him.

"I use what I have. The Dark Lord is never desperate, for the Fates favor me. Look how I have returned against all odds!"

"Your reign will be short-lived and weak, for we are ready for you."

"You couldn't be ready for what I am about to unleash. Now, since you insist you belong to no one, let's have a demonstration of such," he said, pulling his wand from his belt and pointing it at Severus, who looked back at Voldemort with a steady gaze. To Cassi's horror, he said, "_Crucio!_"

Immediately, Severus' back arched in pain and he began to writhe in his limiting chair. Eyes shut tight, his expression of one wracked with pain, hands flexing, body flailing, it all killed her as she watched horrified. After long moments, he gave short screams from beneath his gag and his movements became tired, and Cassi found herself screaming as well.

"Stop it!" she cried. "Stop stop stop!"

The Dark Lord laughed in high tones and stopped a short while later. Severus' body slumped in the chair and he opened his eyes again, breathing hard. Cassi was shaking and looking at the floor again.

"So much for your lack of caring for him," Voldemort sneered, and he stepped away from Cassi to remove Severus' gag roughly. He breathed in deeply, and straightened himself. "That hurt, didn't it Severus? It wasn't enough to kill you though. However, half a minute more and you would have been gone. I know you can still feel the pain from that… do you wish that for her? Why won't you answer?"

Severus gritted his teeth and kept his silence. Voldemort raised his wand again, but Cassi called out before he could say anything, "No don't!"

Amused, Voldemort replied, "Why? He worked as a spy against me; he will be tortured and killed before the sun sets today. I have similar plans for you, though something else in mind first." Cassi shut her eyes briefly, for she knew exactly what he meant.

Severus started in his seat, but restrained himself, for he also caught Voldemort's meaning. "If you so much as-"

"Your threats do not alarm me, Severus! How noble of you to protect her honor, especially since you are the one sleeping with her every night outside of wedlock," he retorted with an evil mirth in his voice at the irony.

Cassi lifted her head with the intention of saying something, but at that moment, the door to the dungeon swung open and a man with black hair marched in, standing near Cassi.

"Sir, the man you sent out on mission is here to see you. He says it's urgent," stated the man importantly.

"Fine, I shall go," he said with a cruel, malicious smile. "I will be back for you both shortly, with Malfoy and McCleland. Enjoy your last moments together while you're still sane. Guard! Watch them." He took two steps towards the door, but stopped next to Cassi to pat her head again and run his fingers through her hair. He then continued on with long strides, slamming the door ominously as his two bodyguards followed him out as well.

Cassi leaned forward and rest her cheek against Severus' knee. "Let's go," he whispered, and he felt her nod. She looked up at him, kissed his knee, then set her face in anger. 

"Well, it's your fault we're here in the first place!" she spat.

"I'm not the one who got myself captured!" he seethed loudly.

"At least I am capable of getting myself out, I don't need you to hold my hand! Why didn't I leave when I had the chance?"

"Because you need me!"

Cassi hopped to her feet and loomed over him. "Ha! Anya Virtov needs no one!"

The guard had awakened during their noisy mock fight, and was now standing, unsure of what to do. "Sit back down," he said to her, though it sounded more like a suggestion.

"I'll sit down when I want to, and when I'm done with him," she growled. The guard walked up to her cautiously when she had turned back to look at Severus, eyes burning with fury.

"You wouldn't dare," Severus said in a smug tone, then nodded at her. She turned around and punched the man firmly in the chest, causing him to fall back on the ground. He made an 'oof' noise as he collided with the ground, and she sprung onto him, pounding him once in the face with her bound hands, his head smacking the floor with a strange thud. His limbs went lax, and she took the keys from his belt, looking at them quickly.

"Harry's isn't on here! Do you have the key that I gave you?" she said quietly.

"Yes, it's in my pocket," he answered quickly. She pulled the wand from the man's belt and turned to Severus, whispering frantically under her breath as she tapped each of his shackles. In unison their jaws snapped open and he was released from the chair and sprung out of it, reaching into his pocket and handing her the key. Taking it from him, she paused to hug him quickly, just to know he was alright. She ran to Harry's cell then, unlocking it quickly and stepping in, then crouching down next to his limp figure. Pulling another key from the ring, she tried it in his shackles, but it didn't fit. She tried another, but it didn't fit. Her hands were shaking, for she knew her time was limited. Finally, she grabbed a key randomly off the ring and shoved it on the lock, twisting it and hearing his shackle fall off him. She repeated the process until all his chains were lying on the floor and she was shaking his shoulders to get him to wake up.

"Harry, Harry please," Cassi whispered to him. His eyelids fluttered open confusedly, and then narrowed at the sight of her. "Yes, Harry, I realize you're not that thrilled with me, but you must come with us, we're leaving."

"Ok," he said sleepily, and stood quickly, senses becoming sharper as adrenaline raced through his veins. He wasn't sure about her, but as long as she was leaving, he would follow. He stepped through the cell door with her following, and both walked briskly to Severus, who was at the dungeon door listening for people coming.

"Keep close and don't speak," Severus said to Harry in a stern, cold voice. Harry nodded.

"Wait Severus, what are we going to do about that Power Crystal?" she asked.

"We leave it, we don't have time and it's not worth the risk when we're this outnumbered," he said, matter-of-factly.

"And if we leave it, what then? They can continue to hide here away from our view and further run Dark operations?" she responded.

"It's too risky Cassi. At least we know they have one, Dumbledore will figure out something. Here," he said in finality, and handed her a dagger from the fallen guard.

"Thanks. Shall we go then?" she said, smirking. He returned it and opened the door a bit, guard's wand in hand. All three slipped out the door and down a dark, torch lit hall. A coat of arms hung on the wall with two knives crossed through a raven, and Severus saw it and silently pulled a knife off it, Harry catching a look in his eye that let him know he would use it too. The continued down the dark hall cautiously, though it appeared that it was empty. The silence made them uneasy, it should be harder than this. They turned right with the hall and found themselves at an end of the hall where it was stairs leading up to the low ceiling.

Severus looked up and pointed, noting that the stairs was under a floor, indicating that this was a secret section of the basement as a whole, used as a place for torture and hiding things from Ministry raids. A square was cut from the ceiling, and hinges were visible from the wood. Whispering, Severus touched the wand tip to each hinge, then pushed the trap door open slowly. Cassi pressed Harry's shoulder, telling him to stay until they sent for him, and stepped around him, running up the stairs behind Severus as both stepped up into the room.

Two guards at the door had drawn their wands at the sight of the opening trap door, and shot red beams at Severus and Cassi as they emerged, ducking. With two shots, Severus had them both lying on the floor unconscious, and Cassi strode over and took one of their wands for herself, now armed with a sword in her left hand and a wand in her right. She waved her wand a little, shooting a few green sparks from it, then shrugged.

"It works," she said in a low voice. "Harry, come up now." The boy emerged from the trap door and gave a glance to the slumped forms of the guards. "They'll wake up in a few hours," Cassi said, answering his unformed question.

Severus peered through a crack in the door and then looked back. "There's another hallway that turns right, with three people in it, then we want to stay straight."

"Alright," she said, watching him open the door. Both stepped through it boldly, leaving Harry in the room safely. The three Death Eaters chatting idly in the hall spotted Severus as soon as he pushed the door open.

"Hey!" one of them shouted. Severus drew his wand and Stunned the one who spoke. The others drew their wands quickly, pointing them at Cassi and Snape.

Cassi stood near Severus and engaged one of the Death Eaters in an informal duel. Her partner, a woman, was smirking as they shot blows as the other, dodging and blocking them without thought. The battle had started next to her, but she dare not take her eyes off her opponent. Just as the woman was beginning to show her weakness in blocking, she heard Severus make a noise of pain in his throat. Cassi turned her attention to him briefly, spying a slash in his robes and scorched skin showing through the tear. She shot one curse at the man Severus had been dueling, leaving him lying blacked out on the floor at the unexpected hit. She then took two strides forward and punching the woman square in the jaw, smashing her to the wall where she fell quiet. Cassi growled and rubbed her knuckles. "Out of shape," she muttered. "Severus, are you alright? Let me see your arm."

"I'm perfectly fine, let's get the boy and go," he said while she peered into his torn robes to survey the blood soaked burn with a grimace. She took his advice however and called to Harry, who looked as the scene in the same curious wonder that he had in he room before, thinking about what type of people he had for professors.

They ventured quickly down the hall, taking the right immediately. They knew they had started at the back of the house near the center, so they blindly made their way forward to the only door they knew of, the front entrance. When they took their turn, they entered a room that was clearly the crossroad of the house; a door lay in every cardinal direction. However, for a crossroad, which is supposed to be full of activity, the room was dusty and barren.

"Straight," narrated Snape, who led them to the door that lie ahead. The brass knob wouldn't turn though, so he tapped it with his wand and tried again, but to no avail. "Damn it!"

Cassi moved to the door on their right, but found it to be locked in the same fashion. With diminishing faith, she tried the other door, but found it to be working as the doorknob gave under her hand. She crossed herself as she opened it fully and ushered Harry and Snape through.

Another long hallway lay before them, all doors lying to their left, the wrong direction for their escape. "Follow it," she heard Snape say, so they continued down the hall with careful footsteps. Tired boards creaked under a worn rug, causing them to wince as each sound seemed to thunder across the hall.

About halfway down the hall, Harry trod a loud one, making him jump back from it and in front of a door. The 2 adults stopped to listen, eavesdropping for sounds of aroused interest in their plodding steps. Voice could be heard from inside the room.

"…Four captives, all in one day. The Master must be half-crazy if he thinks it will go unnoticed by the Ministry! He's upstairs right now, finishing Octavian off. I swear, our strongest ally is Fudge's incompetence, but if we continue…"

Gently, Cassi pushed Harry's shoulder, and he looked back then walked forward, creeping down the hall, the squeaking floorboards going mercifully unnoticed. As they came to the hall's end, the sound of many voices grew louder. By the time they had reached the door, they knew a crowded room awaited them.

Cassi exhaled. "Now what?"

"We run. Ultimately, we want to turn right, but any door will do. You go first with Potter and hopefully their chock will give you time. I'll follow," he answered with resolute.

"I don't like your plans," she grumbled, but took Harry's wrist. "First, let's try this, _decies contego._ That's a shield good for up to ten hits… Ten isn't a lot, but its the longest range there is." She had pointed her wand at the both of them, then herself, and now they faintly glowed blue. Resting her hand on the handle, she asked if they were ready, then pushed the door open quickly, putting her shoulder into it.

The room chattered at first as the door opened, paying no heed to the woman and child who came barging in, but quickly fell quiet as they ran through. There were people in every corner of the room, chatting in small groups, and Cassi guessed the occupancy to be roughly 25. 

"Who are they?" someone shouted.

"What the hell?" another person called.

"That's Harry Potter!" one said, and immediately they drew their wands and shot spells at the two as the raced for the door, graciously on their right. Harry was nervous and breathing hard, but felt himself being dragged along by his professor, who inadvertently was digging her nails into his skin. They made it to the doorway before people began to shoot spells at them, which deflected off and hit the walls and floor harmlessly. Cassi listened hard through the noise of the crowd for sounds of another running person, and soon heard another wave of indignation from the Death Eater crowd. Passing through the door, she pulled Harry to the side and waited for Severus, holding her breath.

A thud was heard inside the room, and Cassi's hand flew to her mouth, then ran her fingers through her shorn hair, breathing his name. A second later, Severus ran through the threshold and shouted to close the door, which she did quickly, releasing Harry's hand.

"Run," he said shortly, and run they did. After about five strides, they heard the door reopen and a mob of people follow them down an eastbound hallway. Spells deflected off them for as they raced, but soon Cassi's shield ran out, followed by Snape's. He grabbed her arm and pulled her aside, then snatched the back of Harry's robe and dragging him back. They fell back through a niche in the hall, and through one set of doors into a small space between two sets of doors, like a formal entrance. Cassi slipped through his grip and shut the doors they had just fallen backwards through, tapping them furiously with her wand. Chains shot across the double doors and locked themselves in the center. Then they went through the other set of doors and she chained them again.

"That should hold them for a bit, I meant the chains to be thicker but with this wand, ugh," she said, then turned around and surveyed the room they had entered, finding it to be a gray entrance hall, empty of people. The big set of doors looked promising. Severus started towards them with Harry following, but Cassi stopped him before he could go anywhere.

"Severus, take Harry and Apparate as soon as you're out of the gate," she said to him firmly.

"Alright," he said slowly, not quite understanding her until he saw her step away from him. "I don't think so, you are NOT going anywhere."

"Yes I am, I'm going after the Crystal," she said.

"No. You. Aren't. Cassandra Talin, it is not worth it, you're coming with me." 

"Severus Snape, no I am not!" she replied hotly. "How many more people are we going to let be killed here without anyone noticing? How many innocent lives are worth my safety? I'll be fine, I'm a big girl. Tell Dumbledore to watch his map."

"Cassandra, you're incredibly foolish," he said sternly, but she wrapped her arms around him and rest her head on his shoulder for a moment, and his tenseness relaxed some.

Looking up, she whispered in his ear, "I love you too, Severus." He pushed her back slightly to kiss her passionately, one last time. He tasted the blood in her mouth, a souvenir of the blow Voldemort struck her, and prayed that it be the last blood she shed because of him. She stroked his hair to touch him again, anything to touch him again. Harry looked away, flushing faintly, but Severus neither saw nor cared, he only wished to make her see reason. The mob of Death Eaters had caught up to them, and was banging on the door, chipping it away with curses.

Finally, she stepped back from him, and he shook his head. "Utter foolishness. Fine, the crystal is a rare dried, compressed mineral, cursed every which way to get it to hold the magical properties it does. All you have to do is-"

"-get it wet," she finished, nodding along. "Easy enough…" He was staring at her so tensely that she wanted to take it back and simply go with him, but she shook the feeling off and sighed. "Get going, they're going to break down that door any second. Go on, go. I'll Apparate when I can."

With one last look at her, he tore his eyes from hers and gestured to Harry to run ahead, which he did. A second later, Severus followed, turning sharply from her and not looking back. Harry and Snape pushed the heavy door open and continued to run, out into the open. Cassi watched them go, then turned to the staircase on her right and started up the steps, one by one, slinking up the stairs.

***

As soon as Severus had torn his eyes from hers, he thought he was making a mistake. As he bound through the threshold of the door, he knew he was making a huge mistake, and as Harry and him raced for the gate to shelter themselves in the shadows of the forest, he realized that there was no bigger fool on this earth than he. However, he pushed it from his mind for the time being to escape the rush of Death Eaters chasing after him, their spells flickering to all sides of him. Harry ran in front of him hard, using his nervousness and training in Quidditch to keep well ahead of the group. Gravel was flung under their feet as they bolted down the path and towards the wrought iron gate.

Harry reached it first, and flung it open, then slipped through it and continued to run into the dark forest. Severus was only a step behind him, keeping up with the boy's youthful run with his long legs. The Death Eaters neared them, and Harry and Severus had to duck and dodge their spells more as they entered the forest. Shadows fell over them, and a strange mist hovered waist high in this forest, which seemed to have taken on the Dark qualities of the house it shrouded. 

With the Death Eaters gaining on him, Severus had to make a decision. They needed to Apparate out of there and back to Hogwarts, but if he left now, he wouldn't be able to come back, for this place is hidden until that Crystal was destroyed and the house was visible on the Darkness map, but by then it could be too late. Angered, he made a quick decision. Pushing Harry off to the right, they both sprinted to the side and off the path, disappearing into the trees, now having to jump over roots and duck branches. After a short run, Severus spied a thick old tree that had been struck by lightening, and the back half of it had been split away. Grabbing Harry's robes, he yanked the boy back and they stepped into the hallow of the tree and waited there quietly, hushing their exhausted breathing.

"Where'd they go?" a voice said soon. Snape gripped Harry's shoulders in front of him to keep him from running in panic, and his wand pointed out of the hallow side from his right hand, ready to attack. Feet churned leaves around them, and Harry shut his eyes as the Death Eater's searched for their missing captives.

"How far are we from the mansion?"

"Far enough to Apparate…. Damn, we lost them."

"The master is going to be furious…"

"… then we better find the girl or we'll be dead. Come on, let's go." The sounds of heavy footsteps receded into the forest, and Snape's grip on Harry relaxed some. Finally, when the silence had lain thick in the misty wood for some time, he pushed on the boy's shoulders, indicating that they could leave their tight quarters.

Severus stepped out of the tree hallow after Harry, who was watching him tentatively, but Snape didn't notice. He simply stood, arms crossed and head bowed, thinking hard. The silence became tense as he remained there, staring bitterly at the ground. Without warning, he broke his silence with a growl and pounded his fist against a nearby tree, then leaned his head against it in defeat.

"Professor?" said Harry with caution. "What are we going to do? I don't think we should Apparate and leave her…"

"I need to take you back to Dumbledore, Potter. You need to go back where it's safe," Severus said after a long pause.

"Well… I think they're gone…"

"That's not the point."

"Then what do we do?"

"I …" Severus started, but shut his mouth and shook his head, slouching his back against the tree. "Logically, the only thing we can do is…is…. to call Dumbledore…" A weird dreamy look crossed his face, and Harry wondered if he had gone mad. Severus knelt on the ground at the base of the tree, staring at a shallow hole near a thick root where water has collected.

"Um, Professor…what are y-" tried Harry, but he was hushed by Severus immediately.

"Quiet, child. I'm trying to remember something…." He stared hard at the puddle as if it was talking to him. He then dipped the tip of his wand into the puddle and murmured to himself, chanting something long in a language Harry didn't understand. The water turned black and spun, then a man's face appeared in it.

"That's Dumbledore," said Harry, trying to peer over Snape's shoulder.

"Yes yes, please stand back, I don't need you falling into Dark water," he said irritably, then he spoke to the face in the water. "Dumbledore, Dumbledore."

"Severus? Severus? Where are you?" said the voice sternly, the note of power quite detectable as it always was in times of crisis. "Where are Potter and Talin?"

"Potter is here with me, sir. We're in a forest outside of a mansion, but we really have no idea where. We're not detectable on the Darkness map because Voldemort has a Power Crystal. The Death Eaters think we've already Apparated to Hogwarts, but… Cassi has gone after the Crystal, she still in there…" He spoke quickly and firmly, keeping his facts straight. "What do you want me to do?"

Dumbledore looked pensive and tired. "Don't leave her, if she manages to destroy it, I will Apparate there with the old crowd and we'll send you back. Stay there with Harry and keep him safe. She has thirty minutes… if we're not there in that amount of time, Apparate without her."

"Dumbledore-"

"Severus, it's very important that Harry stays safe."

"Yes sir, we will wait."

"Good. I'll be watching the map."

"Alright," said Severus, and he placed the tip of his wand in the water again and it went clear. Silence ensued.

"What was that?" asked Harry, trying to take his mind off of their orders.

Severus frowned slightly. "I had to use Dark magic to talk to him. That spell allows you to communicate with people through glassy surfaces. Not all Dark spells have negative effects…"

"Oh," replied Harry. Another pause fell on him. Severus stood up and brushed himself off.

"I'm going to go find her," he said finally.

"Ok," agreed Harry.

"When the Headmaster comes, tell him I'm a horrible listener," said Severus. "Stay here in the tree and listen for Dumbledore. Be careful it's not a Death Eater, and if you end up getting yourself hurt and I get into trouble, you're going to regret it didn't kill you." Somehow, his threat made Harry feel better, and he nodded and walked to the hollow tree, waiting there. Severus took off in a sprint, reaching the gravel path in no time.

***

Cassi walked quickly up the stairs after Severus had left with Harry, more and more set in her task. The house was old but prestigious, decorated in antique tapestries and paintings, though all were covered in a light coat of dust. She reached the top of the stairs and disappeared into a hallway just as the angry group of Death Eaters burst through the chained doors downstairs and ran across the hall in a clatter.

Tiptoeing down the hallway, she listened for any sign of Voldemort. Her silence paid off, for a moment later, she heard a tortured scream from somewhere in front of her, though distantly. Quickly, she continued down the hall.

"Hello, wait a moment, who are you?" called out a voice behind her. She turned around, wand in hand, and glared at a heavily cloaked man. If he made any loud noises, it was going to mess up her plans.

"What do you want?" she growled.

"I don't recognize you, do you belong here?" he asked, and she bared her arm to show her Dark Mark, which burned black and ugly as she was among other Death Eaters.

"Oh. I still don't recognize you, what's your name?" he said roughly, looking angry when she didn't answer.

"We're about the same height, right?" she said to him, her voice changing to seductive. She put her wand back in her sash and circled him once, trailing her hands along the folds of his cloak.

"Yes we are," he said, immediately interested.

"Hmm," she said quietly, pushing his cloak hood down, then unclasping it to let it fall to the floor, running her hands along his arms. He tried to kiss her but she pressed a finger to his lips and smirked, taking one of his hands and leading him to a nearby door.

"I like it rough," he whispered to her in a growl. She opened the door.

"That's incredibly fortunate for you," she said, then shoved him inside and drew her wand. "_Stupify!_" The men fell to the floor roughly, banging his head on the rug. She shut the door quickly and locked it, shuddering.

"How disgusting, some things never change," she murmured, and she picked up his fallen cloak and pulled it over her shoulders, clasping it and then spelling the shadows of the hood to become darker, hiding her face. Now she could walk freely through the halls without being seen. With her wand still in hand, she continued down the hall, trying to find the source of the scream.

Coming to the end of the hall, she sighed. She could go left or right, or there was a small flight of stairs which she could go up and retrace her steps, though on a different floor. Taking the stairs, she was nearly relieved to hear another scream come from above her and just down the hall. As she reached the top of the stairs, a group of people passed her without question, and she smiled to herself. Stepping down the hall, she came to a door from which she could hear through, the room that her target was in.

"…and we say goodbye to Octavian," said a cruel voice, and another scream was heard, then a horrible ripping sound, followed by a liquid splashing. Cassi braved it and pushed the door open to reveal a body sitting at a chair, though it only remotely resembled a body, for the skin lay in shreds on the floor, surrounded by a pool of blood. The sight did not make her sick, for she had seen worse in her days.

"Hm, that wasn't very satisfying," Voldemort said to her as she entered the room, looking at the corpse. "Get out, you're not supposed to be in here, or I'll find my satisfaction in killing you!" He looked up, then laughed. "Do my eyes deceive me? Has my little Russian pet come to see her Master?"

"Yes," she said, letting her hood down. "But for reasons that would not please the Master." She pulled her wand from her sash, and her dagger which she had placed in her sash next to her wand.

"What are you here for?" he asked. "To kill me? To seek your revenge for the pain I've instilled in you life, or for Severus'?"

"That would be nice, but I'm a simple girl," she replied. "Simple girls want simple things… I want the scepter." She pointed her wand at him. "Now."

With a smirk, Voldemort pulled it from his pocket. "Why should I give it to you? You can't kill me."

"You'd be surprised what you can live through," she said through gritted teeth.

"Like slit throats for instance?" he suggested. He sounded so mocking that it was annoying Cassi greatly.

"Yes," she said. "Like slit throats. Or gouges in your back. Or nights spent with you."

"You're so sensitive, even though you've been callused. Even now, I can see in your mind that you would rather break down crying than take the scepter from my hand. My my my, does your disdain for me run deep. I'm touched," he said slyly.

"Roll the scepter to me," she said firmly.

"No, I don't think I will. Come get it. If you can get it from my hand, you can have it." He laid it on his palm and offered it to her, taking a step back.

"You lie and cheat, I don't think I will," she growled. "Roll it."

"At least you learned one thing from me, never trust anyone."

"I trust plenty of people."

"You trust the wrong people. Where is your Dumbledore now? Do you honestly think Severus is going to be there for you for everything? Support you in all your dreams? Think again child, think again."

"Roll the scepter right now, or you'll soon be examining that inch from death you're guaranteed," she said loudly, trying to ignore what he was saying.

"No, take it!"

"FINE! _Accio scepter!_" she cried, and the scepter zoomed out of his hand. However, as her wand was mismatched from it's owner, it's power failed as a fluke, and it fell right to the edge of the pool of blood the man was in. Voldemort and Cassi looked at each other as the scepter teetered on the edge and rest there, then both dove simultaneously to get it. The chair with the man in it tipped over as they struggled in the blood, both with a hand on the short staff.

Voldemort was quite a deal stronger than the average person, and it was soon evident to Cassi that she would get herself killed quickly if she kept this up. Therefore, she splashed her other hand into the blood and then placed it on the orb, smearing it in blood. Almost instantly, the orb began to crack and shine with blue light.

"You stupid girl!" he shrieked. "It's going to explode!"

"Oh, good!" she said, scrambling to stand, then bolting out the door. Voldemort was following her quickly, grasping at her cloak laden in blood. As soon as they were two steps out of the room, there was a massive explosion that sent a pillar of fire through the ceiling and through the floor below them. Smoke them billowed through the house, and random boards and shingles rained on the roof as Cassi ran for her life.

Down the hall, down the flights of steps of the stairs, Cassi desperately made her way to the front door. Just as she reached the bottom of the stairs, placing her on the second floor, she felt a tug around her throat of Voldemort grabbed her cloak up. Choking, she unclasped it quickly and continued to run, her robes wet in blood sticking to her legs.

"No, girl!" the Dark Lord hissed, and he reached a long arm out and knocked her through a door on the left. Wood splintered around her as she fell through it, but she stood up quickly and felt at her sash. Her wand had been lost in the scramble of things, but she had managed to put her dagger back, so she drew it and stood her ground. Voldemort pushed the door open from it's remnants of a handle, and walked into the room with her, a storage room lined with colorful bottles, wooden crates and books.

"We finish this now," he said.

"Yes, yes we do," she growled, and she lunged at him.

*~*

Severus pushed the gate open, running. Past the gate, down the gravel path, he tried not to think of the worst-case scenarios that were bustling into his mind as he re-entered the premises of the exact place he had escaped from. He berated himself for being silly enough to let her go, he scolded himself for not going after her sooner, and he mentally degraded himself for thinking it was possible for her to go after the Dark Lord without being hurt. As he entered the house by pulling the door open, wand at the ready, he heard a huge explosion that shook the house. A chandelier fell from the ceiling of the hall and shattered on the floor in front of Severus, sending glass shards gliding across the floor. He hardly noticed though as the color drained from his face, and started up the stairs quickly. 

At the top of the stairs, a group of people scrambled towards him in their attempts to get out of the house before it burned down, taking no notice of Severus. He pushed against them, elbowing and wading his way through the crowd, then set off at a run again, though his muscles were aching and he felt he'd never breathe properly again. A hallway stood there, and Severus began to walk down it cautiously, listening. A loud struggle was taking place at the end of the long corridor, so he took off that way. He soon spied a door smashed in at the end on his right and he knew the noise was coming from in there.

"Agh! Get off!" a woman screamed with strain, and he was both relieved and worried to recognize the voice.

"Goodnight, Anya!" said another voice, half-crazed in laughter. Severus bound to the doorway to find a horrible scene lying before him.

Cassi was on her back on the floor as the Dark Lord struggled over her, his red eyes glinting dangerously. Her dagger was in his hands and pointed at her chest, though she struggled with all her might against the hilt to push it away from her. Her battle was a losing one though, for the shining point inched closer to her every moment, but she held him off. She turned her head slightly and spied him out of the corner of her eye, and her eyes went wide in shock. At the same moment, her hand slipped off the hilt and knocked the evil Dark Lord's shoulder, but the dagger drove into her chest, just below her collarbone on her shoulder with a crushing sound, then a thump as it hit the floorboards of the room. Voldemort laughed and drove it in farther until she kicked him off.

Without thinking, Severus started forward. He stepped over the door and into the room, kneeling next to her, in an almost dream-like state. Voldemort surveyed the scene delightfully.

"Severus, Severus, I'm fine, I'm fine," she said hurriedly in a whisper, blinking hard and staring at him intensely. "He missed, I'm fine." With her hand, she searched blindly over her chest for the dagger, and felt the blade that was buried almost to the hilt. Taking the handle, she wretched it out of the floor, then her body, and blood poured from her wounds in her back and chest. Pressing her hand to her chest, she tried to stop the blood flow, and he scooped her up to take her back, but she was snatched out of his arms by Voldemort.

"Now now, she's my prize, I won her fair and square," he taunted, holding her cradled upright in his arms so her feet dragged the floor while she clung to his arm to keep from slipping. "Drop your wand." Severus dropped it, listening to it roll across the floor and under a shelf.

"Give her to me. Now," Severus demanded, his arms open so he could hand her over.

"I don't think so," he replied. Cassi was gasping hard, but shut her eyes and screwed up her last bit of strength. With the dagger still in hand, she stabbed her attacker in the back, and he gasped, eyes staring ahead with fury.

"_Da svidaniya_," she murmured, taking the blood-smeared knife out and throwing it in the corner. Voldemort stayed standing though and glared.

"Give her to me!" Severus demanded of the Dark Lord as he gasped.

"Come any closer and I'll kill her!" he growled while looking around, then smiled with blood staining his teeth. "I'll make you a deal," he said, shaking slightly and with a sly grin. "You see that bottle on the shelf to your right? The green one? Drink it and you can have her."

"Don't you dare do it!" she cried at him from his arms, glaring so intensely at him.

"What is it?" Snape asked cautiously.

"It's poison, to put it bluntly. It will also restore half of your strength to me." Voldemort sneered as Severus took the bottle off the shelf and looked at it. "Tick tock, she doesn't have much time. While I will heal in my own good time, surrounded by my followers, she either wastes away in your arms or mine. Pick."

"Severus Snape, I swear that if you take that potion, I'll never look at you again! I hate you! Don't take that potion! I hate you!" she sobbed at Severus with an angry passion as tears pouring down her cheeks. He watched her cry.

"Hmm, maybe not… doesn't seem to be worth it anymore," Voldemort sneered.

Severus continued to stare at the glassy bottle he held it in his palm, feeling the cool surface and watching the black liquid within tumble against the sides. Then, without any warning, he uncorked it and brought it to his mouth, drinking its contents quickly. Staggering, he threw the bottle down and shattered it, then opened his arms.

"Give her…to me… now," he snarled dangerously.

Voldemort sneered. "Die with your slut, it's a suiting end for my two traitors. Enjoy your prize while you still can, Severus _Snape_." He opened his arm that she clung to for support, and she crumpled to the ground, having no strength to even attempt to stand. Severus sneered at him, then stepped forward and knelt at his feet to scoop her up, just as he knew Voldemort had planned.

"Just like your father, you take what's yours at any cost," Voldemort sneered.

He held her safely in his arms and scooted back slowly. "I am not my father. My respects lie in the correct places." He backed himself into a corner and rest his head against the wall.

"We'll see how far those respects get you. Watch yourself and those you love from the afterlife, Severus Snape, for anything you love is my target." With that, he grabbed a bottle off the shelf, and threw it on the ground, only to disappear into a puff of gray smoke. Severus exhaled loudly, sitting with her cradled in his arms, half-resting in his lap. There was silence finally, though they could hear the crackling of fire nearby.

"Severus," she begged in a whisper. "I didn't mean what I said, I don't hate you, I didn't want you to-"

"I know, I know," he whispered back, stroking her hair. He pulled her closer to him, and she snuggled her face against his chest.

"Why didn't you Apparate? Why did you do that?" she asked him softly.

"I think you know why," he replied. It was a struggle to breathe now, and his energy waned quickly. She was shaking violently, but gripping his robes to stay close to him.

"I love you so much, Severus," she said, struggling with the words. He kissed her forehead. "I'm sleepy…"

"Rest your eyes then," he choked, moving a hand to support her trembling head. "Wait for me…"

"Always."

And darkness fell over both of them.

*~*~*

Review please, _spasibo _(thank you).

Oh, and _da svidaniya_ is goodbye, well, it's more like 'see you next time', but she was being sarcastic… yes. Review!


	10. At the Seams

****

Author's Note Alright people, cut me some slack. This chapter is 51 pages long, and I've been really busy. It's crazy. But it's over, and I've got free time to spend, writing at your beck and call. Hopefully these things will be out faster.

What can I say? This chapter is, once again, on the border between PG-13 and R, but I'm sure you're used to it by now. It's not my fault, the characters wrote this whole deal.

I would like to dedicate this chapter to my editor because I'm really grateful she didn't kill me for killing off one of her favorite characters. So, with my life spared, this is for her. That and she had to contend with 51 pages of me taking too long to do stuff. You'll like it, just read. Hopefully the length compensates for the amount of time it took to write it. Oh, and as for my Russian in this chapter, _Vi mozheteh mne pamoch _is 'can you help me?' If you don't get anything out of this fic, you will at least share my knowledge of Russian. Hopefully you like the fic too.

REVIEW! Are you people crazy, or am I really that unpopular? Review, gentle reader, or I might take all summer for the next one! Reviews=motivation. 

Chapter 10: At the Seams

Sounds. Thunder? No, less lofty. Footsteps. The footfalls came from outside the room, where the crackling fire roared closer, billowing smoke through the air. Severus Snape forced his eyes open slowly, looking around the blurred and foggy room. He was still in the mansion, laying against the corner of a small storeroom. In his arms he held a pale and blood-smeared girl, Cassandra. She was limp and drenched in her own blood, which had poured onto him, onto the floor. He pulled her close. The footsteps weren't going to take her, of that he was sure.

They came closer. A muffled voice, no, a few of them, came from the hallway outside. Snape strained to listen.

"No, there's just a smashed in door… hang on," said one voice, then a blurred figure peered its face in, looking around. Severus struggled to remain awake, the swirling darkness beginning to intermingle with his already hazy sight. "Oh my god! _Dumbledore_!" shouted the voice again, sounding panicked. 

__

That name sounds familiar…

A stampede of footsteps was heard, and three people entered the room swiftly. Severus shut his eyes, so very tired. He forced them open again, as a person in blue knelt in front of him.

"Severus, Severus Snape," said the voice firmly. Severus focused his eyes as best he could, but unable to make out the image before him, he gathered Cassi closer. "Severus, you can let go of her now, she's safe." Severus was not sure if this man was as trustworthy as he sounded.

"You can't have her," he answered as firmly as he could.

"I won't hurt her Severus. She needs to get help." Severus glared at the man, not believing him. The man put a hand on his shoulder. "Severus, this is Albus Dumbledore, from Hogwarts, remember? I won't hurt her, but both of you need help." The image of the man became clearer, and it was the friendly old wizard Severus knew. It registered with him that Dumbledore wasn't going to hurt Cassi, and looking down remorsefully into her pale face, he decided.

"You swear she'll be safe?"

"Yes, I swear."

"Then…take her please, save her," he mumbled, offering him Cassandra from his safe, tight grip. Hurriedly, Dumbledore removed her weight from his lap and placed a hand behind her head so it wouldn't loll, immediately handing her over to another person, Sirius, whispering a few low instructions to him in a voice that gave the waning Severus some concern. Sirius stood with her easily, then ran out of the room. 

"Can you tell me why you're so pale, Severus?" asked Dumbledore hurriedly. His tone was urgent yet calm, trying to find out the cause of Severus' ailment that made him look like Death itself.

"The bottle," was all Severus managed while he attempted to push himself from the corner and onto his feet. He had scarcely placed his weight on his feet when he toppled back against the wall and slid down it, depending on the wall to keep him propped up in a sitting position, for the room was growing darker, spinning faster, and blurry. Instantly, Dumbledore was looking at the broken bottle on the floor, dipping his finger in it, and smelling the potion.

"Merlin, that's poison! Severus, stay awake," Dumbledore said loudly, gripping his arm.

"No… he's taken her then?" he asked, making perfect sense to himself.

"Yes, Cassi is with Sirius. Severus! Stay awake! _Severus!_"

~

Dumbledore heard the pop as they Apparated to safety, both supporting Severus' motionless, wilting body. Both him and Mundungus Fletcher were trying to awaken him, but he had not showed one sign of life since they left the house. Their feet hit the gravel heavily, and they immediately began to walk up the path at a fast pace. If Remus did as he was told, Madame Pomfrey should be waiting there.

Sure enough, as soon as they got a bit closer, they could see her at the gate, working quickly over a person on a floating stretcher. The nurse's face was etched in concern as her hands flew over her patient, assessing the damage. They walked faster.

"Oh Lord, him too?" Pomfrey said, looking up in shock.

"Yes," Dumbledore answered urgently. Making it to her finally, they lifted him onto the other stretcher and strapped him in, restraining his thin, limp frame.

Placing a blanket over Cassi's body, the nurse said, "Hurry now, Sirius, take her to the hospital wing, go as a dog. Fletcher will go with you and I'll be there soon." She pushed the stretcher down to Sirius' level as he transformed, then shoved it towards the castle, a black dog now taking a rope off the stretcher and pulling it with him, the other man running to keep up with the dog. Then, she turned her attentions to Severus. "Oh my word boy, what happened?" Her voice was sad as she talked to Severus, then looked up at the Headmaster.

"Poisoned," he answered simply, though with a grim look. Dumbledore watched as she opened a kit on the ground, and delicately emptied a small brown pebble into her hand. Then, standing up, she forced his mouth open, and dropped it in. With her wand, she poured water into his mouth and pressed his throat to make him swallow.

"That should help for now, we'll see what we can do up at the castle," she said. "It might be too late, he's in the last stage."

"And for the girl?"

"She'll be lucky to make it into the castle. She suffers broken ribs, a fractured arm, a burn on her face, a stab wound that punctured her lung but missed a vital artery, bruises, cuts, and who knows what else." The nurse was finishing her check over of Severus with her wand as she spoke. "He's got broken ribs, cuts and bruises, and is poisoned with a Fatal Strength Potion. The blood is hers."

Helping Madame Pomfrey, he grabbed onto the side of the stretcher and ran along side it with her up to the castle.

"There's one more thing, sir," she said uncertainly. "Professor Talin's hair was longer, wasn't it?"

"Yes, yes it was," Dumbledore answered.

"Then why would someone cut it?"

"Games, Poppy. They bear more than physical wounds. Lord knows what Hell they went through." Madame Pomfrey shook her head and ran with her patient, knowing her work would have to be quick.

***

__

Spring rains had come to the castle. Gray skies swirled above her head, and rain poured forth, warm and drenching, heavy yet refreshing as if breathing life into the land. Cassi was waiting, waiting for Severus, for he said he was coming. It was not like him to be late, and her eyes raked the grounds for his beloved figure. She was soaked through and through, torrents of rain breaking over her shoulders and head as she waited.

A figure clad in black rounded the corner of the castle, the intensity of the beating rain producing a halo of mist around him. A grim look was chiseled into his face, and immediate concern washed over her, but she held her counsel and waited for him to approach.

"Severus," she said, hardly to be heard over the pounding rain. Lightening lit the sky, its bolt like a snake's forked tongue, and a clap of thunder rolled through the sky, the voice of nature deep and mysterious. "You look worried."

"It's nothing," he mused gruffly, lifting a hand to caress her face gently. She closed her eyes at the touch as a faint tingling appeared in her cheek, and leaned up to kiss him, raising a hand to stroke his sopping wet hair. She smiled against his lips within seconds of their kiss, at peace with the world now that he was there, and then leaned back to look at him.

"Why did you choose here? It's a slight bit wet," she whispered, observing him coyly. Water rolled off his black cloak and hair, streaming down his face and making his clothes stick to his thin body. She loved this sight.

"I have my reasons," he answered slyly, looking at her as she had done to him. He wrapped his arm around her waist and drew her close, teasing her mouth with his, soft kisses exchanged with growing hunger. His other hand was occupied with cupping the back of her head, fingers tangled in her hair as he so often loved to do. This was her heaven, her perfect place of no pain and hurt, all suffering magicked away with his touch. 

"You grow cold, let's leave," he whispered in her ear.

"I hadn't noticed," she replied softly, "but if you wish." She wove her arm through his and walked with him across the green grass. She soon detected his eagerness to leave this area, and she attributed it to prior look of fear.

Just as they reached the doors of the castle, and were wringing out the hems of their robes while stealing looks at the other, the crunch of gravel was heard behind them. Their eyes snapped to the others, and they drew their wands simultaneously from their sash and belt, whirling around.

To Cassi's shock and horror, Simon Donovan stood before them, a mad look in his dead eyes and a bloodstain on his robe. He was pale with dark eyes though they were glazed over, a half-living look about him that unnerved the couple. "Well, well, how cute this is, two Death Eaters madly in love." He drew his wand without a word and pointed it at Severus.

"Simon, you're dead," she breathed weakly, her wand quivering in her hand.

"Not as dead as you'd like, I'm sure," he answered with suppressed wrath. "Not as dead as you should be!"

At this, Cassi clutched her shoulder where her former wound had been, and stepped closer to Severus, unable to do anything in her creeping fear and paranoia. Severus was glaring dangerously.

"It's time for you to go," Snape said through gritted teeth.

"Likewise," was all Simon said before waving his wand, a green stream of light bursting from the tip, hitting Severus without a hesitation. Immediately, he fell to the stone porch heavily, dead. Cassi dropped to her knees, feeling the explosion of sadness, shock, and infinite torture all burst into her mind at once. She pulled his shoulder so he turned over, then placing his head in her lap as tears blinded her vision. Her love and life were ripped from her body, leaving behind a bloody shell of a girl. She stroked his hair hopelessly and quietly pleaded with him to awaken, as laughter rung in her ears, low and crazed. The laugh transformed as it continued though, and it became high, cold, and mirthless; it became familiar. Knowing what she would see, she looked up not to see Simon, but Voldemort himself.

Cassi returned her eyes to Severus' face, unafraid. "Go on, kill me and end it. You've won. Isn't that what you wanted, for me to beg for death? Well, I'm begging; take me."

"I did want you to beg, but not in this fashion," Voldemort answered, amused.

"Just do it," she spat. Footsteps were heard, then two cold hands grasped her upper arms, forcing her attention from one man to another.

"Not until I'm done," he hissed emphasizing every word. "Your family is dead."

"No…"

"Yes," he started. "Yes. The Virtovs are no more. Severus is dead. You will not join them until I feel like I've finished." With this, he forced a cold and horrible kiss on her, plunging into her mouth with a disgusting control over her, though she panicked. He gripped one arm tighter, but she struggled to get away from its grasp, and escaped his mouth long enough to scream in fear, her voice piercing through the subtle hiss of rain and the rumble of thunder.

~

She sat up, screaming as she had in her dream.

"Hold her still!" 

"I'm trying!"

Cassi opened her eyes to find herself in a curtained room with two people pushing her back against the bed, struggling with her gently. Her mind was swimming, and she only knew panic.

"Cassandra Talin, please be still, you'll make yourself worse!" Cassi looked to the speaker wildly, realizing it to be the familiar face of the Hogwarts nurse, the safe and kindly face. Turning quickly, the other person who restrained her on the left was revealed to be Sirius, a face that was quick to smile, though not at the moment. Finally, she breathed with relief; dull aches and a sense of total exhaustion filled the corners and planes of her body, so she relaxed herself until she was lying down, the nurse smoothing the covers over her lovingly now, smiling in relief. Sirius was smiling now too, looking tired but grateful. _Rest, rest. The danger has passed._

"Oh dear, oh dear! The Headmaster will be so overjoyed. Sirius, don't let her move, not an inch while I fetch her medicines and the Headmaster. Not an inch, do you hear? She's in an extremely delicate condition. Not an inch!" With this stern lecture which had included finger wagging and a glare, she smiled again and left through a curtain. Hangings surrounded her bed, sectioning it off from the rest of the hospital.

"I- ….I'm alive," she whispered, surprised and tired.

"Barely," said Sirius, sitting down in a chair next to her bed. "Three nights of mixing potions, researching charms and translating Arabic is what it took to keep you with us. You lost a lot of blood and broke several bones, along with other ailments. You're lucky you made it out of the house." He did indeed look tired, well beyond that of the youthful 36 he was known for, but more like that of an aged man who has seen great sorrow in life.

__

House, running, pain, Voldemort… "Severus!" she cried out suddenly. "Severus! Where's Severus? Is he alright, where is he? Tell me he's alright, Sirius, please!" Her panic was acute, for the last time she had seen him, both had intentions of seeking out the other in another world. The dream of his death was not helping either, causing a dark and hollowing sense of dread to dig at her heart.

"Calm yourself. He's better off than you were, I'm sure he'll be just fine," Sirius said, trying to keep the disdain out of his voice at the mention of Severus. 

"I _need_ to see him," she said quickly. His uncertainty hadn't sufficed for her, and even if he had said he was perfectly fine, she would have needed to see it to believe it.

"He's not awake," replied Sirius.

"Sirius, _Vi mozheteh mne pamoch?I need to see him._" Cassi searched his eyes, begging him with her own, but he gave her a firm look.

"You'll get yourself worried or excited and Madame Pomfrey will have my head. You're really not well, just lie down and rest. Severus will be awake later."

"Sirius," she pleaded. "Sirius this is important to me. You don't know… from what happened… please."

He caved, and made a sound of resignment. "Alright. I'm _not_ doing this for Severus though. I owe you anyway, not that this is enough."

"Owe?" she asked, puzzled.

"For Harry."

"Ohh, yes, you're his godfather, Dumbledore mentioned that, err, earlier. Whatever day it all happened on. You don't owe me anything and neither does Harry. I'm his teacher, it's my job. Not quite in the job description, but… it's a duty." Cassi took up Sirius' hand in her own, trying to comfort him on a subject which brought him surprising amounts of pain, drawing the worried lines on his face. "How is he? Was Harry alright?"

"Not a scratch on him, just a knock to the head," said Sirius, closing his eyes. "It could have been so much worse…" He stopped, not wanting to go on, and shook his head. Cassi squeezed his hand.

"Then Severus took care of him," she said. "By Severus, it was possible to escape. He…" she said, but her voice died in her throat and she turned her face from him. She looked back after a moment of fighting tears.

Sirius sighed heavily. "I'll have to … thank… him then," he said with effort. "Come on, put your arms around my neck and I'll carry you."

Cassi smiled and did so while Sirius bent and scooped her up in his arms from beneath the covers, one arm supporting her back, the other hooked under her bent knees. When she rested her head on his shoulder, he stood and said, "Hullo! You're really light. I'll wager Severus enjoys that."

Cassi blushed and pushed her forehead against his shoulder. "Hush you!" Sirius grinned, then peeked out of the curtains to see if the nurse was coming, then seeing that she wasn't, sneaked across the room where another curtained box sat directly opposite to hers. Sirius slipped into it discreetly, and Cassi's eyes sought Severus. When they found their object, she was forced to stifle a gasp that sprung from her lips by covering her mouth with a hand.

"He's so pale," she choked, her mouth still covered. She indicated to Sirius to lay her down on his bed and he did so, though reluctantly. As she was set down, Cassi examined her Severus with sad eyes; his eyelids were shut, dark shadows lingering around his sockets, his pale lips lacked their normal color, and his cheeks were sunken. His mouth was set in a firm line, but the rest of his face was expressionless. She leaned over him and kissed his lips, laid one arm across his chest, and buried her face into his neck, vainly choking back free-flowing tears. She lay next to him, grateful to have ever touched him again, but broken-hearted from what he did for her and what it did to him. For the longest time, she simply held him.

She felt a hand on her back, so she turned over slightly to look back at Sirius, sitting in a chair next to his bed. "Please don't make yourself ill, he'll be fine."

"I hope so," she sighed, quietly wondering with dread how she would live if he was not fine. The thought was so radical that she found no answer. Perhaps she just could not think about it, or maybe there was no answer because she did not think it possible… A long silence ensued, and she remained where she was, deep in thought, all aches ignored.

"We should go back now, Cassi. Madame Pomfrey will be here soon…" 

Cassi smirked as a memory occurred to her. "You know, Severus told me about you and your group of friends at school. Defiance of authority shouldn't be much to you," she said dryly, and rolling over onto her stomach to look between the two easily, propping herself up on her elbows.

"Nice to know you obtain your information from unbiased sources," grumbled Sirius, and she gave a faint smile, then looked back to Severus.

"I don't think the less of you," she said. "We all do stupid things when we are young." Her note was somber and thoughtful, and both took the words to heart. Thick silence fell.

"… I'll bet you didn't blow his projects up, though…" added Sirius, breaking the sincerity of the conversation. He was trying to cheer her up, though it was without knowing exactly what the ailment was.

"Ha, no I didn't," she said, breaking a short smile, then looking at him, sadness blanketing over her again. "How far was the poisoning?" she asked.

"Last stages," Sirius admitted. Cassi closed her eyes hard, fighting back everything inside. He had placed his hand on her arm, rubbing it gently for he knew she ached both inside and out. "Hey now, don't worry. Madame Pomfrey did a good job with him; he'll wake up anytime now and go back to being his- urgh, normal self. Look at me… I don't know what happened at that house the other day, but I know it wasn't good. It caused pain Harry isn't willing to recount until you're both awake. But everyone made it out, and I _promise_ that he'll live, and you won't have to describe your horror alone." She was comforted some, but kept her eyes closed to avoid crying again. However, Sirius' hand was withdrawn suddenly shortly after his speech, and another grip placed itself there.

"Trying to sweet talk her out from beside me, Black?" asked a slightly croaky voice, though the deep voice Cassi longed to here. Her head snapped up and her eyes open, turning to him to peer deeply into coal-black, curious eyes.

He was leaning on his side slightly, looking tired and somewhat groggy, but looking at her with a gaze so intent, it seemed to express his amazement aloud. She cried out quietly, a second before her lips sought his needy ones, both shutting their eyes tight and savoring the others' taste and the feeling of being together when it never seemed possible again. She followed him as he lay back on his pillow, unable to break their kiss until the need for proper air was upon them. Somewhere, off in the distant part of the real world (which was shut out almost entirely), Cassi thought she heard a sound of disgust from Sirius, but didn't bother to dwell on it. His chair scraped across the ground as he stood, and a swoosh of the curtains was heard as the third person in their party left the other two to peace.

Finally, she pulled herself out of the kiss, breathing hard on his lips. Raising her eyes to his, she looked at him firmly and said, somewhere near an angry fury, "You stupid man! You should _not_ have done that! Damn you and your nobility! Damn you for worrying me so! Damn you!" Her furious demeanor resulted in another passionate kiss, her fingers tracing the contours of his face, worshipping them with her feathery touch.

He broke the kiss suddenly and replied in an equally irritated tone, "I wasn't the one who _foolishly_ went after the Crystal and started the uncalled for business!" 

"_I_ had a good reason."

"So did _I_." He held her gaze meaningfully now, and she closed her eyes and rested her forehead on his, then pulled back his covers and slipped under them, pressing herself against him. Their expressive silence was broken by the sound of multiple footsteps pattering along the floor and a giant door being pulled shut, echoing through the hall.

"Sirius Black! I thought I told you to be watching her!" called Madame Pomfrey's voice as she discovered that Cassi was not in her correct bed. Severus looked down at Cassi, and she smiled.

"What, you expect me to be a good girl and stay in bed?" she whispered to him. He smirked, obviously humored by her inability to do as she is told.

"I was," Sirius replied to the nurse. There was a suspicious silence.

"Sirius! Did you put her in with Snape?! If you did…"

"Yup. He's awake now, too."

There came a flustered clucking sound. "My word- I never – inappropriate… two ill patients! Not saying that I'm not thankful he's awake, but… I never!"

"…Poppy, if I may intervene," said an older, wiser voice, the now unmistakable voice of Albus Dumbledore. "Perhaps it's best to give them some time alone after what has happened."

There was a livid silence, then the nurse answered, "Oh, I suppose you're right. Fine. But they'll take their medicines on time or they get separated. Do you both hear that? Honestly. At this rate it might as well be renamed Dumbledore Wing! Hmph!" Her feet stomped off, followed by the steady sounds of Dumbledore's walk, along with his low chuckle.

Severus looked at the curtains where the argument had taken place, then looked back to Cassi. "Extremely amiable, isn't she?" Cassi laughed gently, studying his weary face.

"You look awful," he said quietly, cupping her jaw and running his thumb over her cheekbone.

"Oh, that's nice of you to notice."

"You know what I meant."

"Yes I do… and you don't look much better. You're pale."

"Even more so than usual? You're actually pale yourself… blood loss, I suspect…" he said, trailing off. His curiosity and need to be ensured of her health drove his hand from her face down to the neckline of her robes, which he swept off her left shoulder. Below her shoulder was a deep purple-green bruise on her light bare skin, with a small, thin scar in the center. She watched his hand, his fingers ever so lightly caressing the wound as if to heal it, then she closed her own hand over his softly, and brought it to her lips.

"It's just a scar, my love," she whispered. She saw his eyes flicker at 'my love', and knew he liked the security of the phrase.

"You bear too many scars as it is," he replied simply, though with a definite tone.

"Then what is another?"

"One too many. And you know yours are not simply skin deep."

"Same as yours," she replied, stroking his hair. "You would be surprised how much loving someone heals such wounds."

His eyes met hers. "…I think I know."

She looked at him in awe. In his rare moments of expressiveness, he seemed to enchant her with the power in his words and tone. Though he usually hid his emotions behind a well-refined mask, one look into his eyes told her he was being perfectly honest. With barely any time to wonder at his deep affections, she found her lips pressed lovingly to his own, soon tasting his surprise and eagerness. It wasn't long before she withdrew a short moan from his sore throat, his arms wrapping protectively around her.

It was about the time that she felt his hand seeking a way to find the hem of her robes that she smiled and pulled back from him. "Now now, none of that. I need my robes, it's frightfully cold in here, even if they are… pink. She dressed me for torment, I'm certain. Look!" She lifted an arm from his chest from beneath the covers to show her violently pink sleeve.

He wrinkled his nose in distaste. "How very attractive. At least you're dressed properly, I don't have a shirt." He now looked at her suspiciously.

"It was not my doing, it's the nurse!" she said defensively. "Not that I mind." Her hands ran down his chest, delighting in the feel of his skin.

"Well then, the score ought to be evened. I'll settle for the removal of the horrendous pink thing." His hand returned to its search.

"You wish, you hopeful b- Severus! You're not well anyway, go to sleep," she said, nudging her forehead to his, pressing him against the pillow. She removed his hand from the back of her leg and put it on her back, while he grumbled but relaxed. To give both of them more room, she slipped off his chest and to his side. He put an arm around her waist, still grumbling, and pulled her back until both were on their sides, his chest pressed to her back, spooning into her.

"…Nurse Talin," he taunted, and she gently elbowed him, then cuddled back against him. "Are you burrowing? It's not that cold."

"Just shut up and enjoy it."

"I am." He kissed her neck softly, then laid back with exhaustion.

~

Cassi opened her eyes slowly, wondering where she was. She was in a hospital bed, certainly, but not Severus' or her first bed, for there was a window above her head, though no sun shone through it. Night had fallen, and she had no idea what the date or time was. Carefully, she sat up in bed, and soon heard voices outside of her curtained room.

"I'm not taking that, Poppy." That was her Severus, and she grinned at the evident annoyance in his voice. He sounded like he was simply one bed over to her left. With pleasure, she pictured the aggravated look on his face.

"Oh yes you are, Professor, and if you don't, I'll IV it into you."

"You will do no such thing. Let me have a Soothing Solution in the Anti-Ache Concoction's stead."

"Why?"

"… Undesirable side effects."

"Oh. I'll see if I have any as soon as I finish with the both of you. Now don't fidget so or I'll miss with the needle."

"What is it?"

"Oh Severus, just take it!" Cassi called spitefully, grinning at the stern look she knew she was being given through the curtains.

"I'd _like_ to know what she's jabbing me with prior to the shot!"

The nurse sighed loudly. "I believe I am the nurse here. You put up a bigger fuss than she does. There, that wasn't so bad, was it? Now lie back and go to sleep. Quietly." She stepped through the curtain, and soon entered Cassi's space.

"Imagine that, a full grown man putting up such a fight," she whispered as she busied herself. "You should have seen him earlier…"

"Why, what did he do?" she asked in a low voice.

"He woke up about an hour ago when Sirius disturbed his bed to take you out of it, on _my_ orders, and was quite grumpy about the entire matter," she said stiffly.

"Poor Sirius," Cassi mused.

"I think he had fun with the situation, but that's Sirius for you. Alright, swallow this while I give you a shot," she answered, then forced a cup into one of Cassi's hands while arresting her other wrist. She drank the potion, sickeningly sweet, and felt a small, sharp pain in her arm. The nurse grabbed the cup from her when she was done, and Cassi sat back, settling down some, though fidgeting restlessly.

"When do we check out of here?" she inquired softly.

"Tomorrow night," answered Madame Pomfrey curtly. "Dumbledore wants you both free by then."

"Alright," she replied. "What day is it?"

"Saturday, soon to be Sunday. You were out for three nights. It's near midnight now, you should try to go back to sleep," the nurse said in an official tone. As if reading Cassi's mind, she added, "And you can see Severus _in the morning! _Goodnight." She shuffled out of the curtained room, across the Wing, then into her office, shutting the door behind her with a click.

Cassi heard the curtain rings slide across the bar in Severus' pace, and grinned. Following suit, she reached out and opened her curtain, just enough to see him.

"You two were talking about me, weren't you?" he said in a loud whisper.

"Yes," she said, trying to suppress a smile.

"What did she say?"

"Nothing really, she was just telling me that you had words with Sirius earlier," Cassi said, and Severus' mouth thinned in displeasure from the sound of that name. She shook her head, then motioned for Severus to come to her.

"What? No, you go to sleep. I'm not going to go over there and get beat severely by the nurse," he said with resentment, sitting up in bed, looking absolutely tempting to her. Luckily, both paused as they heard Madame Pomfrey come back to give Severus the potion he requested. He took it without a word, and the nurse bid them both goodnight and walked out, the lamps dimming as she left.

"Fine then," Cassi stated as soon as the nurse was gone, and she swung her legs over the side of the bed. Severus hissed his concern about her walking immediately, but she shrugged and stood shakily, then stumbled barefoot over to his space, shutting the curtain behind her, turning to flash a sly smile at him.

"Agh, teasing sprite!" he murmured as she crawled onto his bed, sitting straddle across his lap atop the covers. She took his face gently into her hands and kissed him softly, simply. Searching his eyes, she found her reflection in them, and sighed, kissing his forehead and then nuzzling her nose against his, playing kisses on his lips. How she would have missed this… She felt the need to bare her soul and remove the heaviness that lingered around her heart. The 'what ifs' were suffocating her, creeping into her mind and scaring her more and more. Her arms flew around him, hugging him tight as she thought what she had nearly lost, and how lucky she was to be able to do this. 

"Severus," she whispered to him softly, returning her lips to his and unwinding her arms. The thrill from touching him soothed her to further convince herself he was fine, but she found herself unable to move her mouth an inch from his. She searched for his hands, and clasped each individually in her own hand, ready to speak after a deep breath. "I love you. You mean everything to me, you make me feel …like I don't have to hurt anymore, and that I wasn't supposed to be alone in the shadows. When you took the poison in that house, I wanted to die quickly so that I never had to see the pain I caused you. Even in the unconscious world, I dreamt you died. I couldn't handle it, the pain it caused… I can't… the images are…" Her voice cracked. His eyes had bored into hers, searching through them as if looking for something, but by the end of the speech, she was unable to make eye contact, trying to control her sadness. 

"Quiet, quiet," he said soothingly, pulling her close so she could rest her head on his shoulder. He let the silence reassure her, stroking her hair as he thought about her words. "May I say something?" he asked her.

"Not if it's going to make me cry," she choked. "Go ahead anyway."

"Hmm," he hummed quietly, lost in a thought, still stroking her hair. Slipping the robes off her shoulder again, he looked at the scar and bruise, frowning at it. "Cassi… As I watched him stab you, I watched my world end. When he took you up in his arms, and I was sure those were your last breaths, I could not stand that he should be the last person you felt. And I could not have left you there to die. Not again. There would have been no way to forgive myself if I had done that. If I had lost you again…" He shook his head slightly, as if to dismiss the thought. She sobbed once, shuddering slightly, and he held her tighter. "But it's over, and we're both here, somehow. It's over, my Cassi." He knew it wasn't really over, and that it wouldn't be until every last one of the Death Eaters were gone and their master was destroyed permanently, but they were out, and alive. It would be a long while though before he stopped dreaming of her pinned to the floor, impaled on a blade, or of hiding in a misty forest with Death Eaters scarcely a meter away, and he knew it would be the same for her.

She sighed after awhile and leaned back to look at him, wiping her eyes quickly with her hands. "God bless it, Severus. Every single time I've cried this year, it's because of you. I used to be perfectly emotionless before I came to work here, and now look at me. I'm a girlish –ugh- wreck!"

"You're beautiful, even when you cry," he said, running a finger along her cheek. Her eyes widened at his words.

"Why must you be so _sweet_ to me at the _worst _times?"

"Because now is not the time to taunt you about your repulsive pink robes."

Finally, she grinned, closing her eyes. "There, I knew you still had it in you." She leaned forward and kissed him, prolonging it as much as she could, loving the feel of his hands splayed across her back. Smirking mischievously to herself as she remembered something, she ran her fingers through his hair one last time, patted his chest with two small taps, and then quickly slid off his lap. He made an indignant sound in his throat, and scowled, muttering something distinctly about baring his heart and soul and getting nothing in return.

"…every other night my bed is perfectly fine for you, but yet tonight is somehow different?"

"It isn't different, goodnight!" she said, backing out of the little room, loving his frustration. She blew him a kiss then shut the curtain, scampering off into her own bed and trying not to giggle. Just as she was settling down to sleep, he spoke out.

"Cassi?"

"Yes?"  


"You vex me greatly. Wench."

"I love you too. Goodnight, you vile, cold-hearted automaton."

She heard him chuckle quietly to himself.

~

The sun was bright as morning peered into the Hospital Wing, rousing its two patients from their sleep. Almost immediately after waking, the nurse pattered over to their rooms with her clopping heels to inspect her patients. Finding them satisfactorily apart, and in improved health, she allowed Cassi to go over and sit with Severus for the morning, under strict orders that if anything 'funny' happened, she'd use their blood to thicken potions. 

Therefore, she spent the morning sitting next to him, just talking with him. Not often did they get time to just talk; one was always busy grading or looking something up. Madame Pomfrey brought them breakfast, and they ate together. He picked on her habitual way of pushing the ham to one side, and she pointed out lovingly that his slaughtered animal was getting cold. Eventually, this conversation turned to the more serious matter of the meeting that was to be held that night (the only reason Dumbledore would want them free so soon), and in hushed voices they decided what needed to be left out for the general public. There were some things, they knew, that they would infinitely keep to themselves, personal scenes that bore no importance to the others. Other things, like the fact that Cassi was an ex-Death Eater, would be inevitably shared. 

By lunchtime, Cassi had woven herself into Severus' arms and was combating sleep, as he was. Both figured out very quickly that Madame Pomfrey had skillfully planned this more than likely with a slow acting sleep potion, but they were too tired to argue with it, and fell asleep before lunch was served, pressed tightly to the other.

Cassi started awake suddenly, listening to the regular breathing of the person lying next to her, then relaxing. She lifted her eyes to his face and smiled serenely at his clear expression, the evening sunlight from around the room illuminating his features. No concern or guilt dwelt on his face, he looked peaceful. The lines that usually carved into his face, making him look ten years older than he was, disappeared when he slept, leaving him looking at ease and youthful. The need to touch him overwhelmed her. Carefully lifting her hand, she pushed a lock of hair out of his face and behind his ear, but she somehow stirred his slumber, causing him to sigh and absently pull her closer with the arm around her waist. A small smirk formed on her lips, and she entertained herself by drawing designs on his bare chest with her fingertip, sometimes punctuating them with kisses. She saw a small smile flit across his lips at this, and amused herself by trying to procure these small expressions of contentment with further kisses, now trailing slowly up his neck (where she found a sensitive spot and noted it), along his jaw line, then brushing her lips against his lightly, undecided as to whether she should awaken him or not. Making her mind up that she'd deal with a grumpy Snape if need be, she propped herself up on one elbow and pressed her lips to his, gently working his mouth open until she heard him intake a sharp breath. His arm was now animated and undoing a short sash she wore with the robes, while the other hand ran down her side.

"A man can't even sleep for a few hours without being disturbed," he mumbled, opening his eyes slowly and looking up at her with interest. 

"And what remarkable subconscious reflexes you have to show your resentment," she breathed, taking her sash from his hands and tucking it under his pillow, then settling down next to him. He looked at her with irritation, but then cupped the back of her head in his palm to have her look into his eyes properly.

"Have you been up long, wreaking havoc on my body without permission?"

"Only a few minutes." He nodded at this, and she grinned. "Why?"

Severus looked away by rolling his eyes and mumbled something about an odd sort of dream, and Cassi couldn't stop herself from snickering softly.

"I hope I was the one in it," she giggled, but he looked back at her seriously.

"Of course you were," he said, sounding slightly wounded.

"It was jesting, _dear_."

"As if I have others to dr-"

"Don't give me that, Severus Snape. I've gotten the impression that I'm not your first lover, and dreams cannot be helped. My question was legitimate, but still a joke!" She poked him on a sore muscle, and he flinched while she smiled, satisfied. He narrowed his eyes at her. With defeat, he exhaled loudly in defeat and tucked his head under her chin, making her reaction to embrace his shoulders with one arm, and the other hand to stroke his hair. She found this gesture cute, if somewhat obvious. 

"You're incredibly difficult, and will continue to be so, won't you?" he asked flatly, and she laughed again.

"Yes. It's entertaining to annoy you, especially when you want to artfully avoid the subject, as you just did."

"Imp, would you _actually_ like to hear the response?"

"I'm curious now that you're dodging it."

"…Fine. I've had three, erm, girlfriends, I suppose, when I was much younger. To sum them collectively up, they were short, pointless, and enough to make me turn from dating for as long as I could escape it, which to me was until I was nailed into my coffin."

Cassi smiled, even though he couldn't see it as he was still listening to her voice through her chest. "They sound lovely."

"Don't think that you can escape the topic either."

"I don't have to, _I_ didn't date. I was always to busy, and entirely less than interested. A few aggressive men made passes at me, but most ended up with a black eye. That's why you scared me half to death; I had no desire to injure you."

"Did I really frighten you?"

"Yes."

"Knowing you, I'm sure that upset you greatly," he said, almost laughingly, and she feigned indignation.

"Yes, it did… what are you so thrilled about? Happy you instilled fear into me?"

"I find it amusing."

"Damn you. Well, as much as I was afraid, I'm sure _you_ were furious."

He pulled himself out of her arms, then propped himself up on his elbows on either side of her shoulders to look at her. "That, madam, is not anything you need to know." He leaned down and kissed her.

"Which means I'm right."

"No it does not."

"Yes, yes it does."

"No it does not."

"Yes it does."

"No."

"Do I have _permission_ to kiss you?"

Severus smirked, then said in an exasperated voice, "I suppose so." She ran a hand through his hair and kissed him, only to feel the familiar yet thrilling sensation sweep through her body as she touched him, and he reacted by pressing into the kiss harder, almost crushingly. He had mastery over her reactions, and she knew it when he drew a line from the back of her jaw down to her neckline, tracing it with his fingertips, causing her to slip her arm over his back and dig her nails into his skin. He was about to draw her closer with another kiss when the main doors to the wing opened loudly and a pair of feet walked in.

"Madame Pomfrey? Do you know if the professors are awake?" said an elderly, wizened voice. Severus mouthed a string of cursing, then rolled off her and sat up in bed, now muttering about wanting his shirt the nurse had kidnapped. Cassi sat up as well and took her sash from beneath the pillow, tying it quickly around her waist and running a hand through her hair.

"You've got a nice physique Severus, I don't think you desperately need a shirt," she said innocently, but shot him a sly look.

"Yes, I believe I heard them talking a few minutes ago, Headmaster. You can go see them if you wish, but don't excite them too much," came the nurse's reply.

"Of course you don't. I'd like to be dressed when I talk to my superiors, though!" Severus admonished quickly to her in a low voice. The click of boots across a stone floor grew louder, and the curtain slid open a few seconds later to reveal a smiling old man.

"Cassandra, Severus, so nice to see you awake. You look infinitely better," he said approvingly, shutting the curtain behind himself. They quietly chorused their thanks, Cassi clasping her hands atop the bedspread, Severus folding his arms. "Has Madame Pomfrey told you that there is to be a meeting tonight?"

"She said you wanted to see us tonight," answered Severus.

"Very good. Well, we're holding a meeting tonight at nine, early this month, but necessary. I believe the others of the group need to hear the details of the adventure, though I'm sure there are parts you would like to keep to yourself. I'd also like to ask you if there are things you would like to share with me, but perhaps not of concern to the group." Dumbledore sat at the chair by Severus' bedside close to the foot of the bed, as Severus glanced at Cassi quickly.

"I don't think so… but, ah, how much of Anya are we going to discuss?" Severus asked.

Dumbledore held Severus' gaze for an undecided moment, then looked to Cassi. "Would it stress you considerably if we told them the whole truth?"

"Dumbledore, don't you think that's a bit much? As reasonable as these people are, they are rather zealous about ending Dark matters," interrupted Severus quickly.

"I think that as much that needs to be told, should be told," Cassi said shortly after Severus, who shot her a hard glare.

"If I thought she was in danger, Severus, I would resist revealing her. However, if you are still concerned, I will talk instead of her. They trust my judgement. I'll talk before you begin with your explanations, with your permission," Dumbledore calmly stated, nodding at Cassi.

"Of course," she replied.

"That reminds me, Harry will also be attending out meeting tonight," said Dumbledore. "Each of you have different stories, we might as well hear them as well. Harry has already agreed to the invitation. I also think he will be coming by here today; he expressed an interest when I said you were both awake and well."

Severus murmured something darkly, and Cassi nudged him with her elbow. "Thank you," she said for him. 

Dumbledore smiled, eyes twinkling. "I owe you both my gratitude for bringing him back, and for the sacrifice you made to destroy the Crystal. Merlin knows I won't forget that moment, when Severus' voice rung out from a window. It was brave of you, if not a bit nerve wracking. However, we have an advantage now, at least for the time being. Alright, I just wanted to briefly talk with you both before the meeting." He stood from his chair, but just before he left, he turned back to them. "Oh, and you're both taking next week off."

"What?!" they exclaimed.

"I'm going to have to demand that both of you take some time off, and a week should be enough," he said again simply.

"It's too long-"

"-an entire week?"

"Plenty of time to rest, I'm sure you'll both find things do to without the students… like reading." He bowed, and left, while they gawked after him, blinking hard.

"Was he just making fun of us?" asked Cassi after a moment.

"I'm going to assume he simply meant reading and leave it at that," answered Severus, looking at the curtain still.

"I don't assume anything with him anymore… And Severus, you needn't worry about me so much," Cassi said. "What do you expect, they'll mob me in some last attempt to finish off a dormant killer?"

"I'm not worried. And don't talk like that."

Cassi grinned at him evilly. "Aww, you're so cute when you become concerned."

"No I'm _not_! I forbid you from using that word as a description of me-"

"How about adorable?"

"-or any likeness of the word."

"Cranky, horrid old prat?"

"Better," he said while smirking. Severus leaned over to kiss her, but the curtains opened at that moment, and he pulled away in dismay.

"What did I tell you both?!" squawked Madame Pomfrey. "I can't leave you alone for any amount of time. Look, I brought you both a change of clothes from your room; there are showers across the Wing through wooden doors. Take them separately, dress separately. Professor Talin first." The nurse laid the stack of clothes on the foot of the bed, and stomped off.

"She's so sweet-tempered," Cassi said, rolling her eyes, then slipped out of bed and scooped up her clothes. Severus scowled and watched her leave longingly.

He took this time to quietly recap what had happened after being kidnapped. The forest, the house, the basement, hallways and doors, another forest… it all spilled back into his mind in horrible detail. He allowed images he had repressed to surface again, becoming hardened to the pain they caused. Quickly, he became lost in thought, losing track of time, so that when Cassi called out that he could get ready, he was startled out of his reverie. 

Cassi played with her robes, fixing her flared sleeves so they weren't so twisted, then readjusting her sash so it fell to her left side, the tails trailing down to her ankles. She then ran her fingers through her hair, which was nearly dry. Satisfied with her perfecting, she sat down on her bed to eat the dinner Madame Pomfrey had brought her, placing the plate in her lap. There was, of course, a piece of chicken sitting in the very middle, but Cassi prodded it to the right with her fork and ate the side dishes around it. When she had finished, she set the plate on her nightstand and leaned back on her bed, listening to Severus walk around his space, pacing by the sound of his steady steps. She knew what he was thinking about, but she refused to think about it until she absolutely had to. They had about an hour before the meeting, but already the troubling matter was on his mind. By letting him alone, she knew he would deeper disturb himself, so she resolved to give him a few more minutes, then go and pester him.

Unconsciously, she smiled as she thought about him. At the beginning of the school year, she fumed when she thought of him, but now it was all she could do not to smile and sigh. She had changed, she realized, without changing. She was the same person, but now without the secret pains and addictions. And now, she had something to live for, some_one _to live for. Now she was restless. Rolling over, she tried to rest on her stomach, but realized that she was staring at the curtain towards him, then gave up her struggle and stood. Smoothing her robes and hair, she parted her curtain and crossed into his space.

"Severus, are you trying to wear a path in the floor?" she asked maliciously, smirking at him and leaning against the wall by his bed.

"Not intentionally. I was thinking," he responded, stopping a few steps short of her.

"Do you always pace when you think?"

"Not always."

She looked at her nails, pretending to be uninterested, then put her hands behind her back, leaning back on them. And she knew her lack of attention had caught his.

"Did you come here to bother me?" he asked, taking a step forward.

"No, I actually came here so you'd stop troubling yourself," she replied, and he folded his arms. Now free to look at him, she studied his clothes, and forced her jaw to remain shut. He wasn't wearing his normal black, billowing robes; he was wearing long black slacks, and a gray cotton, collared shirt which he tucked in for formality's sake, with the sleeves rolled up to just below his elbows. The top button was undone, almost forcing her to look away quickly to suppress her sigh, and his hair fell around his collar and tucked behind his ears, actually neat for the time being. Soon, she realized that he was looking at her in about the same manner, and blushed. She was wearing nice black robes that fit her properly, perhaps setting off her form a little more than she would like.

"You look very handsome," she said.

Severus closed his eyes briefly and brought himself back from a thousand miles off. "Oh. It's too casual for this meeting-"

"I still like it," she said, walking towards him slowly, then placing her hands on his chest, leaning back slightly to study his shirt. She nodded slowly. "Yes, very nice indeed."

"You look nice as well," he said, swaying back and forth with her, now wrapping his arms around her. Cassi grinned evilly to herself; her plan was carrying out quite nicely.

She placed a kiss between his collarbones at the base of his neck, then pushed him slightly so he'd sit back on the bed, but he resisted slightly until she made it quite clear that she wanted him to sit. Leering at her slightly, he pulled her down with him, and both fell back on his bed. She grinned, hovering over him slightly, while he claimed her mouth with as many soft passionate kisses as he could have before she pulled away and worked the side of his neck over with kisses, until she struck the spot that made his fidget, and placed open-mouthed kisses on it. His mind reeled, and he bit his lip hard to fight a moan.

"What are you doing, Cassi?" he gasped quietly.

She looked up. "Should I stop?"

"God no. But be careful, you'll leave a mark."

She bit him gently, and he tightened his grip on her. "That's the point, I swore I'd repay you for the one you gave me just before a meeting earlier this year."

"Oh you wench!" he said, still obviously not fighting her, and she giggled and stopped a short while later.

"There. Now we're even."

He felt his neck. "Does my collar cover it?"

"Just the bottom half," she snickered, while he closed his eyes and grumbled to himself. She kissed him to make up for it, and just when he wove his fingers into her hair intently, they heard the doors open.

"Are the professors here?" came Harry's voice. The nurse replied and they chatted for a bit.

"Damn it! Why can't people let us alone?!" Severus hissed venomously. "You're staying with me tonight, I don't care what the nurse advised."

"Did she say for me not to?" asked Cassi as she sat up and on the edge of the bed and ran her fingers through her hair.

Severus did the same, looking extremely irritated. "Yes, yes she did." Cassi patted his shoulder innocently, just as Harry entered Severus' small room.

"Uh, hello professors," he said nervously.

"Hello Harry," said Cassi in a happy voice. "How are you?"

"Oh, um, very good, thanks. Well, I just wanted to thank both of you before the meeting started, because I don't think there will be much time for that. So, thank you, you saved me. I'd probably still be back there if you hadn't… right. Thank you, Professor Talin, for helping me through the house, and," Harry swallowed, already fidgeting through his entire speech, now looking most obligated while he said through gritted teeth, "and thank you, Professor Snape."

Cassi smiled at him. "It's our job, Harry. You're welcome, though." She elbowed Severus, who couldn't force himself to do anything but nod, which was good enough for Harry. "Harry, are you sure you'll be alright to talk about what happened in front of all those strangers?"

Harry flattened his wild bangs, as it was now one of his nervous habits. "Oh, yeah, I reckon so. I didn't want to say anything before this because I was knocked out for some of the time, and dazed for most of the rest. Might as well have it all out in one night."

Cassi nodded stiffly. "You're going to hear some things in there Harry that a lot of students aren't going to want to know."

"I know. Dumbledore said I'd only have to go to the first hour or so of it."

"Very well then, we'll see you there."

Harry looked slightly relieved. "Alright, thank you." He nodded at her, shot a glance at Severus (who was glaring at him intensely), then left quickly. Cassi smacked Severus on the arm as soon as he was gone.

"Be nice, he's just a boy," she said severely.

"A boy with publicity issues."

"That's not his fault."

"It is when he uses it to his advantage to gallivant around the school-"

"Hush you. I have yet to see any gallivanting. You just don't like him because he's your enemy's son, and it doesn't help the poor boy that Sirius is his godfather. Honestly, your rivalry with him is entirely idiotic."

"Rival? Rival over what? There's nothing to be a rival about, if anything, he should be jealous of me."

"Then _why_ are you jealous of him?"

Severus scowled at her as she moved to sit on his lap. "I'm not jealous."

"Mmm hmm. Right. Tell me that when Sirius is talking to me in Russian."

"You don't need to stand so close to him when you speak."

Cassi rolled her eyes. "Not jealous. Right." She kissed him on the cheek. "Don't envy him, you've got a firm hold on me."

He was delighted, but kept a straight face, though a gentle expression.

~

They walked to the meeting later together, Cassi careful to keep a reasonable distance between them so as not to attract attention to them. As a rule, most of the students were in their Common rooms after dinner, so they met very few students along the way, but those they did pass shot them strange glances, not knowing exactly why their professors had been out of class for the past four days. Cassi was grateful just to be out of the Wing though, so she ignored the stares gracefully, and wondered if Severus even noticed them.

Dumbledore's gargoyle sat just as it always had, a stone feathered bird in an archway, waiting and listening for the password. Severus stopped before it, looking at it absently, then said "Acid Pops" in a clear voice. The gargoyle swung open, and they stepped through the archway. After walking up a few steps, Severus stopped suddenly and turned to Cassi, who was following behind him.

"Are you alright?" he asked, face blank and mysterious.

"Hmm? Yes, I'm fine."

"You're pale as parchment."

"So nice of you to warn me that I don't fit your color standards. Now, please, I'm fine, let's walk," she said tartly, but stepped up to kiss him quickly. He blinked, raised an eyebrow, then continued on, now following her.

When she pushed the door open, the first thing she saw was Sirius standing over a chair, talking with a sitting Harry. Cassi smiled quickly at both, and walked to the chairs next to them, gesturing to Severus to follow. Rolling his eyes and now crossing his arms, he followed and sat, not looking at Sirius as he came over to Cassi and embraced her. He couldn't help stealing glances when they chattered concernedly for a minute in Russian, but he felt relieved when she took her seat next to him finally, though between himself and Black.

"I'm going to learn that language one day, you know, and then you won't be having secret conversations with _him_ anymore," Severus muttered darkly.

"I'm sitting right here, _Snape_," Sirius said, irritated.

"Which is why you heard what I said, _Black_," Snape started tersely. 

"Men," was all Cassi had to say, and she sat back and folded her arms, waiting to watch them, but both gave the other a hard glare and turned away. Cassi crossed her legs, her top foot bouncing slightly, beginning to feel nervous. More people filed into the room, and she noticed the room was fuller than usual. She suspected that everyone was attending this time, which only made her foot bounce more.

No one was really talking to Severus or herself, they seemed to be avoiding them as if they were emotionally fragile and therefore not worth risking a conversation with. Shrugging, Cassi remained seated, watching for Dumbledore to arrive, not listening to the conversations floating around her.

After what seemed like an eternity, Dumbledore finally pushed open his door, and two people followed him in and took their seats, as Dumbledore walked to the head of the table and remained standing.

He stood without a word, even though the entire table had fallen silent as soon as he had entered. Finally, he started. "I don't believe we need an introduction, I'm sure you all read the papers about how our two professors and young Harry Potter went missing for nearly a day, and Rubeus Hagrid was found dead at the edge of the forest. However, you are going to hear the truth, and not what the papers concocted to fit the situation. The truth includes Lord Voldemort, unlike the papers led you to believe. I'm sure by now you know what is written in the news is first approved by the government, so nothing is to be believed from there. In order to understand the story though, you have to understand why it occurred. Voldemort wanted revenge on Harry, Professor Snape, and Professor Talin. Harry for the downfall from power he caused years ago, and the professors due to turning from his service." There was a collective murmur that ran through the table.

"She's not a Death Eater though," someone from the other side said.

"Not anymore. She was however, years ago when she was-"

"-when I was Anya Virtov." Cassi stood now. "Thank you Dumbledore, but I think I should to tell them. I was Anya the Assasin. I joined him when I was eighteen, and did his bidding for nearly a year before I was found guilty of disloyalty to him. Therefore, I was beaten with the scepter Voldemort carries, and then my throat was slit. When he left me to die, a forest hermit took me in and healed me, but I had forgotten nearly everything until this year. Amnesia, if you will, but more similar to repression."

A disbelieving silence ensued. "Preposterous, what sort of joke is this?" a man near Dumbledore said, laughing. Cassi rolled up her sleeve and showed him the faint Dark Mark, from which he recoiled.

"It's not a joke at all, her story is quite true, there are witnesses to it," Dumbledore said, his voice steely. 

"Then why is she still here? Do you know how many people she killed? That Death Eater is responsible for who knows how much terror!"

"And that Death Eater," said Severus without missing a beat, glaring at the man, "is the reason Harry is with us today, and she is also the reason why the Dark side's progress has regressed, so sit down Pierre." 

"You're not any better!" Pierre said tensely back.

About seven other people, including Severus, bounced to their feet, angrily shouting at him until Dumbledore hushed everyone, and gestured that they sit. "You are all here on my invitation, I'd like to remind you, and I trust _everyone_ in this room implicitly. Both have repaid their debt to society a thousand times over, and neither have connections with the Dark side anymore. None of you have led perfect lives, so I ask that you respect each other. If you are not with us, you are against us, now is the time to choose sides." He paused, and no one said a word. "Alright, now that our background is up to date, let's let Harry and the professors tell their story so we can all go to bed while it is still night. Harry, we'll start with you."

Harry had been regarding Pierre with a distrustful look, but now nodded at Dumbledore. "I don't have to stand, do I?" he asked.

"No no, you can remain seated," Dumbledore said kindly, and Harry nodded again and gripped the edge of the chair as all eyes turned to him.

"Well, um, last Wednesday I woke up early because my scar was hurting, and I thought I'd take a walk because it seemed nice outside. I prefer to take my walks alone, so I went outside and just decided I'd walk around near the forest a bit, then head back for breakfast. I guess I walked too close because a man came up behind me and grabbed my mouth and wand hand, so I struggled with him until he won. My Gryffindor badge got torn off, so I hoped someone might find it, but he hit me on the head with something and I don't remember much more. Well, until a big doorway, but when I woke up Professor Talin and Professor Snape were being taken down the steps and to their cells in my dungeon. Then some people came in to talk to them, Mr. Malfoy I think, and some other guy I don't know …and then Voldemort. He told me that Professor Talin was a Death Eater and Hagrid was dead, and he put the Cruciatus Curse on Professor Snape, but when he left, the professors unlocked themselves and we escaped…." Harry wasn't being very articulate, mainly because he didn't understand what was happening at the time when it seemed they all knew something he didn't when they spoke.

Dumbledore thanked him, and Cassi and Severus proceeded to tell their side of the story in greater detail, leaving out a few lines here and there about what they said to each other, Harry sometimes chipping in with what came back to him. The audience sat shocked and horrified as they talked, but some scribbled down important details as they went through it, their faced scrunched in concern. Several times, one would fall silent through the story, and the other would quickly step in, but by the end, it was Severus who was talking in his factual, upright manner. When he was finally silent, he sat back in his chair and folded his arms, their story complete. Dumbledore stood again.

"And you're sure it was Octavian in the chair?" asked Dumbledore, and Cassi repeated that that was the name Voldemort had said, but it was impossible to identify the body. "Well, that's another Ministry official killed because he did not believe in Voldemort's return. Thank you all for sharing that, and Harry, you may go back to your dormitory now."

Harry stood from his chair, waving slightly to everyone who nodded back, and then left the room with a grateful expression.

"And you stressed the importance of the secrecy of this meeting?" a man asked. 

"Yes, he's very aware of our desire to keep it a secret, there's no need to worry. Does anyone have any questions or comments?" asked Dumbledore, but no one would speak, so he continued. "Just to follow up, we found the house to be in the north of England, just west of Sableshire, a small magical village. Dark movements have withdrawn from the house and virtually died from our map, so it we have been bought some time. Alright, now I would like to hear how the Ministry is taking this and what has been rumored there, because I sent Cornelius a full report of what we knew up until this evening, but he has yet to reply. Anything, Ither?"

"Well, Fudge was acting skittish all morning, but he hasn't mentioned it. We usually have a plan of action for such things, where we give the press what they want to hear according to the wizarding world's overall…"

Cassi stopped paying attention, she had had her input and she was now tired. She turned herself slightly in her chair towards Dumbledore, but at this angle she had a better view of Severus, and her mind wandered. He looked tired despite four days of rest, but he was listening raptly, though with a look of distaste. She smiled to herself when she saw he had covered the mark with his hair. He felt her eyes on him and glanced over at her, and she smirked and bounced her foot more, turning her eyes away. He looked away too, but kept giving her quick glances to make sure she wasn't looking at him, which she never was. Amused in her new game of distracting Severus, she was suddenly struck with an idea, and slipped her shoe off easily beneath the table. Then, very gently, she nudged his ankle with her foot, and he gave her a sharp, incredulous look, and averted his eyes.

Slyly, she traced along his foot, then along his ankle and slightly up his pant leg until he was shooting her withering looks, mingled with a sort of furious desire. Grinning at her irritated byproduct, she slipped her shoe back on her foot and sat up in her chair, feigning attentiveness. A few people were taking turns talking about some budget proposal the Ministry had in case of economic depression due to Dark activity. Some people stirred in their seat, and quite a few were writing things down, quills plinking in inkwells and scratching across dry parchment. 

For revenge, Severus discreetly placed his hand on the top of her thigh beneath the table, and shot her a superior look. He lightly scratched her leg, and she very quickly slapped a hand over his to stop him from relocating it, and glared. Amused, he let go, and she picked up her quill and dipped it shortly into the well, then wrote in shining black letters on her piece of parchment, then shoved it towards him.

__

"I want to leave," it read in tiny script. He dipped his quill into the well and wrote back to her in his evenly spaced, neat handwriting.

__

"I don't think it would be acceptable to leave together in the middle of the meeting. Your boy toy would make the connection," he wrote back. She smirked when she saw it and lifted her quill.

__

"Now who did you say was not jealous?" she wrote, slipping the paper to him, and touching her foot to his leg.

__

"I'm not_ jealous… And would you stop with this foot thing?"_

"No, because you'd be disappointed if I did stop."

"Why would I?"

"Because you like it… Severus, your handwriting has become shaky."

"No it hasn't and if it had it would be your fault, now sit there quietly until this is over." Cassi read his message and grinned, then tucked the note into her pocket and waited. The voices were becoming less interested and frequent glances up at the clock told her it was half past eleven, too far past their attention span. She finally began to listen as the meeting wrapped up.

"… I think that's about it for tonight. If you have further things to discuss with me, my window is always open to owls. Please keep me updated. Alright, I think the staff has had enough for now. Goodnight everyone." Dumbledore settled back in his chair as everyone stood, milling around. Severus stood near Cassi in the crowd, but pulled her back by her sleeve when Pierre passed, his eyes slits of hatred. When he was gone, both inched towards the door, and exited, slipping quickly down the hallways and then out of the gargoyle. 

As soon as the stone archway was shut, Cassi yanked Severus closer and kissed him roughly, rejoicing that they were out of the crowded, lamp lit room.

"Eager much?" he asked in a whisper. She looked indignant and stepped away, folding her arms in retribution and tilting her head away. He wouldn't stand for that though, and gently placed his hands just under her jaw line then kissed her, delicate, slow, and soft, growing deeper and more intimate with each passing second. It was therefore only natural that Cassi jumped back suddenly, quite startled, and ran down the hall to the stairs, disappearing from sight just as the archway opened and a few members of the meeting walked out, talking amongst themselves without suspecting a thing. Calmly, Severus began walking to the stairs, a few steps ahead of the chattering group. When he finally did reach the stairs, he started unceremoniously down them while the group stopped at the top to discuss something, so he reached the bottom well before them. There, he smirked to himself and looked down the dark vacant hallway past the Great Hall.

Shrugging slightly, he continued down the hall, heading for his dungeons. Each window shone silver moonlight into the hall, washing over the floor and lower wall like a white veil. He watched each as they passed under him, his shoes padding over them quietly as he listened to all sounds with interest. Finally, he heard light breathing and smelled faint peppermint as he neared the end of the hall near where he would turn to go down the steps into his dungeons.

"Severus." She stepped out from a shadow and allowed herself to be taken into his arms, her hands resting on his chest. "Are they gone?"

"No, but they won't come down this way," he answered. She nodded against his chest, and he ran his fingers through her hair. "You know, your hair isn't so bad shorter," he commented.

"You think so? You just like playing with my hair, which is nearly the same length as yours."

"Yours is longer, but this way it doesn't get so tangled," he looked down at her with his own form of playfulness; a curious, amused look, though it feigned sternness.

"Do you want to test your hypothesis, Professor?" she asked slyly, reaching up to slide a hand to the back of his neck, the other wrapped around his waist, now mimicking the placement of his hands. She didn't really give him time to answer though, because her lips were pressed hungrily to his, tired of hiding desire. He pulled her closer against his body, mindful not to touch her sore shoulder. Nudging her jaw, he indicated for her to relax. Immediately, the feeling of his tongue against hers thrilled her beyond normal sensation, and she moaned and pulled him closer. They broke their kisses only to steal quick breaths or to let their kisses wander down the others neck and return to their lips.

"Severus," she sighed when he kissed her temple. He looked down at her, seeing fragility and independence, innocence and lust. An overwhelming feeling washed over him, but he pushed it away for when he had more time and when it was safe to analyze it. Her head was tilted back to gaze up at him, but she dropped her gaze quickly and tugged at his sleeve, beckoning him to follow her. She lead him down a hallway and then down a flight of stairs into the dungeons, only stopping twice to steal a kiss.

Once down the stairs and descended into the frigid dungeons, she flung her arms around his neck, capturing him in a fit of passion in disregard to their location. Their balance was off and they threatened to tip over, so he picked her up (not so difficult for she wrapped her legs around his waist) and backed her against a smooth stone wall. He decreased their pace, kissing her painfully slowly until she whimpered and tried to sway him to go faster, but she eventually succumbed to his firm, unhurried movements. Unconsciously, her hands moved to his shirt pulled the bottom out of his trousers, then began unbuttoning it, glorifying in the feel of his skin on hers. However, she was in the middle of this task when Severus pulled away from the wall, forcing her to stand on her own and interrupting their actions.

"What?" she asked breathlessly, leaning back on the wall with her cheeks pink in blush and her hair teased out of its normal perfection from fingers tangling themselves in it too many times. This sight alone was tempting enough to forget why he had stopped her, but he persisted.

"I think the Slytherins need checking on," he said as he buttoned his shirt up and tucked it back in. 

Her jaw dropped. "You're jesting."

"No, Merlin knows what they've been doing at night while I've been away, you just reminded me," he said stiffly, now straightening his clothes and running a hand through his hair. She scowled at him, knowing full and well that he had planned this from the beginning.

"Go then, Severus Snape, but don't expect anything more from me, I'm going to bed," she said in a cold voice, and tried to walk off, but he grabbed her around the waist and dragged her back.

"Hardly," he said, amused. "Go to bed then, I'll be back later." He kissed her roughly, and she caressed his cheek, pulled suddenly away and slapped him, then stormed off to his classroom. He allowed himself a very smug looking smirk while he rubbed his stinging cheek, then walked to a hallway on his right. 

At the end of the hall stood a blank wall, to which he said "Serpentine" in a clear voice. A door swung open that was concealed in the wall, and he stepped through it, immediately hearing about four sets of feet scatter.

Looking around, he observed his familiar scenery. Green lamps hung from the ceiling, giving an eerie glow to the rough stone walls and overstuffed furniture. The green light mingled with the yellow from the elaborate fireplace, the green steady and dim, the yellow flickering and strong. The chairs closest to the fireplace were empty, as was the sofa, and the sound of several doors shutting and feet hurrying off were heard. He smirked proudly and was about to turn to go when a small voice piped up by his side.

"Hello," said a small girl with blonde hair pulled up into a ponytail and curious gray eyes, and he recognized it as Agatha Smith. She was accepted to school early this year at the age of nine because her parents were moving away to avoid the Dark uprising, or so they said. Although young, she was as smart as any first year and had a special flare for Herbology. On top of that, she had no fear of him.

"Hello," he returned. "Why are you out of bed? It's late."

She rocked back and forth on the balls of her feet, her night robe dragging on the ground. "The other students said you came out of hospital today, so we were talking about it, and then you came in, so I hid, but I wanted to say hi."

The little girl hung on his pant leg slightly, barely any taller than his waist. "Well you've said your hello. Was there something else you wanted?"

Agatha motioned for him to kneel, which he did after looking around, so she cupped her hand and whispered in his ear, "Was it scary?"

His face softened, and he looked over at her. "It was scary, but it could have been scarier if I had stayed," he answered in a low voice. She looked relieved.

"Junie said I wasn't s'posed to ask you that," she said in her child's lisp, "but I was afraid if it was real scary you'd move away and we'd have a new teacher, and he'd be mean."

"Am I not mean enough for you?"

"No!" she giggled.

"Hmph. Don't you worry yourself, at any rate. I'm not moving away, where would I go that's safer?" he said, subliminally reminding her that she was sent here because of her parents' concern.

"I dunno. So you're ok then?" she asked. "And, and Professor Talin too?"

"Yes, we're both alright," he said as he stood again.

"Millicent said she's your girlfriend!" Agatha said with a high-pitched, frightened giggle at such a racy topic.

"Miss Smith, that is private. Now then, it's time for you to go on to bed, your roommates will wonder where you are," he said, and the little girl nodded as he patted her head shortly.

"Ok, g'night!" she said, and raced off up the stairs in the back of the room. He watched her, then shook his head at the strange student, and turned to leave, the stone doorway still open, but closing behind him quickly. In all his years as a teacher, he had learned one thing: if their own Head of House did not show Slytherins kindness, no one would. Their parents most certainly wouldn't, the other teachers were prejudice against them, Dumbledore was just one man, and when they graduated, they were thrown into hostile circles of society. Therefore, he favored them above the other students, and disciplined them himself, but was gentle when need be. While thinking this, his brain automatically led him through the maze of hallways, eventually emptying him out in front of his own classroom door.

He entered his classroom, the torches lighting up at his presence. Locking his door and sealing it as he did every night, he looked around quickly, grateful to be back in his sanctuary. His potions jars still sat evenly on the shelves, holding brightly colored potions and objects floating in various liquids. The desks lined up neatly, and his desk was the same except for the substitute's binder, which sat off to one side. The room had his approval, so he moved on and entered his office, shutting the door behind him, and then entering through another door and down a short hallway. Once he reached that door, he paused before going in, wondering if his presence will warrant another slap in the face. Having no choice, he entered, only to find Cassi sitting at the writing desk in her long white nightrobes, deeply immersed in a book.

"I thought you were going to bed," he said cautiously as he shut and locked the door behind him.

"I was going to, but I decided to look at this book before I did so. It's interesting," she said, and he stood behind her chair and looked at what she was reading.

"Don't even bother with that trash," he said, disgusted as he read "Emerson Bloodstone's Potion Collections" at the top of the page. She smirked and flipped the page, having yet to make eye contact with him. Curiously, he stroked her hair with his right hand, looking down at her as she read, sometimes slipping his hand under her hair to stroke her neck, but none of this spawned any reaction. Her ignoring him was worse than any anger she could have had for him, so he turned away suddenly and strode off to the bathroom to get dressed and retrieve his bathrobe for in the morning. The second he shut the bathroom door behind him, Cassi turned around and stared at the door, grinning. She turned back around, returning to her reading, but listened as he clattered around in the bathroom. Finally he emerged with a grumpy expression, tying the belt of his bathrobe in a hasty knot and sitting on the bed.

"It's midnight, Cassi," he said firmly.

"Not only will he leave you at inopportune moments, he can tell time too!" she replied automatically.

"I mean that it's late and you need to go to sleep," he said, mostly ignoring her comment about his sudden departure.

She turned around finally, looking at him with amusement. "Ah, here's where the _real_ truth lies. Now is it that you want me to go to bed because I've been in the Hospital Wing for four days and I've been medicated and unwell, or because you want me to be in bed with you?"

Severus opened and shut his mouth, narrowing his eyes.

"Say it," she taunted. 

"Why do you do this to me, apart from taking pleasure in my verbal difficulties?"

"Because," she started, now walking over to him, straddling his lap but keeping herself just far enough away so she could dodge his kisses. "Because you've kept me waiting all day, and I think it's funny when you have trouble expressing what you really want to say, especially because you're _always_ displaying your opinions in class."

He glared. "You're a teasing, _teasing_ imp."

"And when translated from Severusese to normal conversation, it means….?"

"It means I want you to come to bed so I can …make love to you."

Cassi smiled and kissed him. "That's all I wanted." She pulled her wand from her pocket, waved it once, and the torchlight lowered considerably.

***

The dungeon was as dark in daytime as it was at night, due to the lack of windows. This served both Cassi and Severus well the following morning, for they slept in past their normal dawn arising. However, a loud knock at the door that morning did not do them well. 

"Severus," Cassi murmured, pulling herself off his chest and rolling away. "Severus there's someone at your door."

He sat up blearily, fumbled for his wand and lit the torches. Then, he stood and collected his bathrobe off the floor and wrapped it around his thin frame modestly. Cassi slipped out of bed, straightened her nightrobe, and stood next to the door so that when it opened, it blocked the view of her, but she could still listen.

Shaking his head, Severus opened the door to find Dumbledore standing outside it. 

"Good morning, Severus," Dumbledore said in a manner that alarmed Cassi as she listened.

"Good morning," Severus replied roughly, trying to sound as professional as possible.

"I know this is an inconvenient time for you, but I know you needed to hear this. We've got Hagrid's body back from the morgue at the Ministry, so we're having his funeral this evening by the forest's edge near his house. The students have the day off, and will attend the funeral after dinner," Dumbledore said gravely.

"Oh, thank you. Yes, I did need to know when that was. We'll both be there," he said when Cassi nodded to him.

"I knew you'd want to go, being as close to him as you were. Try not to dwell on it Severus, he wouldn't want you to," Dumbledore reassured.

"I won't," Severus complied readily.

"And do try to eat something while you're both on break. Starvation did not suit anyone well. If you need anything, you know where to find me." Dumbledore paused (Cassi assumed he had taken his small bow) and Severus shut the door slowly. 

Without a word, Cassi wrapped her arms around him, swaying side to side with him as if to rock him like a child. He let her hold him, knowing it was a loss for her as well.

After a long time, Cassi spoke. "He was a great man with a big heart. I will always remember that."

"As will I," he whispered very softly back. "He was my only friend who wasn't Dark when I went to school here."

"I'm very sorry Severus." He nodded, then paused.

"Let's go get something to eat, it's a quarter 'til ten."

As Severus and Cassi walked back from breakfast, she veered them off course so she could get something from her classroom. Severus, having nothing better to do (and he noted this loudly), followed her. By the time both had woven through the hallways to her classroom, most of the students had gone outside to enjoy the day, a majority of them to sit in tight circles and talk about the mysterious kidnapping. Stepping into the classroom for the first time in days, Cassi looked around, a faint smile playing on her lips as she saw her classroom again.

"They moved my desks," she commented quietly, noticing that they were in groups now instead of in rows. Making a mental note to move them as soon as her seven days were up, she walked over to her desk and began sifting through papers. 

"What are you looking for?" Severus asked, tapping his foot and folding his arms.

"I thought you didn't have anything better to do," she retorted, still rifling through stacks of scrolls.

"I don't, but I'm sure I can find something productive to do in the time it takes you to sort through that mess," he replied, looking around. He missed the fact that she slipped a small piece of parchment into her pocket. Gathering her scrolls in her arms, she sighed loudly at him and walked past him, now ready to leave, but not before she prodded him with a rolled up assignment. He scowled and followed her, shutting the door to the classroom as she walked off at a fast pace. Fortunately for him, his legs were much longer than hers, and he was able to catch up with her, looking at the floor darkly.

It was not until they reached the dungeon that she spoke again, her voice riddled with amusement. "Why Severus Snape, I do believe you are swaggering."

He stopped dead in his tracks, and turned to face her. "I do no such thing."

She walked around him now, circling him with glee. "It was rather obvious too. Tell me, do you walk like that everywhere like you own the place, or just when you're trying to show off?" A few straggling students stopped to gawk, then hurried away.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he seethed, rolling his eyes. She shrugged and took up her spot next to him, walking through the maze of passages. He shot her glares as she suppressed giggles, biting her lip and looking away. When they reached the room, she was full out laughing. Irritated, he shut the classroom door hard and watched her as she disappeared through his office door, then followed after her.

The scene he came upon in the room was symbolic of her humorous findings. The scrolls had been dumped into a basket next to the desk, some not quite making it into their target, and she was on the bed, curled into a little ball and laughing hysterically.

Severus sighed, annoyed, and sat on the bed next to his little ball. "Is it really that funny?" he asked.

She grinned up at him. "You- you swaggered all the way here!" Another fit of laughter overtook her. 

"I do not swagger. End of story. I'm wondering if you're right in the mind," he said, reclining back on the bed and putting his feet up and his hands behind his head. 

"Of course _you_ don't think so, you probably strut about as if you own the place on a regular basis! 'This is my dungeon, dammit! _Bow_!'" she said, imitating his voice for the last. He couldn't help but smile somewhat at her impersonation, but soon recovered and pressed his mouth into a firm line. 

She curled up next to him and sighed, patting his chest with one hand, then yawned. 

"Is the walking judge tired?" he asked sardonically.

"Severus, we got half a night's worth of sleep, what do you think?" she replied simply, forcing her eyes to remain open. He enclosed her in his arms by rolling over slightly, and she nestled under his chin.

"Go to sleep then," he whispered, and kissed the top of her head.

~

Cassi awoke to the feeling of a hand soothingly running along her back, and opened her eyes slowly. Severus was lying next to her with a peculiar expression on his face.

"Did you sleep?" she asked, clearing her throat.

"Yes I did, for a bit. I woke up about half an hour ago," he answered, still rubbing her back.

"Then why are you still laying here?"

He frowned. "You were shaking in your sleep."

Embarrassed, Cassi looked away. She didn't even notice when she did that anymore, and it had almost faded entirely when she moved in with Severus, but every now and then, he would wake her up or hold her tight, telling her it was fine, and she assumed she was flinching or shaking again. She knew this would not be the last time either. "Sorry," she mumbled, looking up at the ceiling and moving away from him slightly. He frowned more and stared off pensively, and after a moment, took a heavy breath.

She turned her head to look at him, and seeing the distant look on his face, she carefully placed a hand on his chest and moved back to him. "Severus…"

"What?"

"What's troubling you?"

"I'm not troubled."

"Liar."

He absent-mindedly stroked her hair with his right hand now. "Mm, just thinking."

"About?"

"Things. Hagrid, the Ministry, Dumbledore… just things." Slowly, she moved her head to his chest and held him tight, stroking his arm for comfort. He was somewhat startled by this gesture, but accepted it quietly. Both lay just as they were for a good half-hour, simply being together, still attempting to come to grips with reality. It was too soon to think about everything, and yet unavoidable. She pressed her cheek to his chest. He had his own private way of mourning and mulling, and she wished he wouldn't be so uptight when he did this, but let him have his healing process.

After awhile, Cassi lifted her head and leaned over to kiss him. "Want to come criticize me while I grade papers? It will keep you busy until dinner, then we can talk afterwards." He nodded and sat up with her.

"I'll start with Mister Longbottom's," she as she shifted her papers in the basket and pulled on out.

"I'm ecstatic," he replied flatly, but stood over her shoulder and watched.

~

It was during dinner that Cassi noticed the return of the thoughtful look on his face. He had put his fork down halfway through dinner and did not pick it up for the rest of the meal. She finished her roll quietly, and when the rest of the staff (who all looked tired and distracted, minus Dumbledore who was not there) finished, they looked around, and stood in unison. The students followed suit and followed their teachers out of the Great Hall, the Houses remaining together as if for protection. 

The mass flowed out of the giant doors at the front of the school as a Prefect held them, and continued their trip out to Hagrid's hut. The grass was greening up now, and everything showed signs of a warm spring. The evening sun half peaked over the trees of the forest, their green tips spiking up against the round orange orb, which spread its fiery array of colors across the ever-changing sky. Night was beginning to fall to one side of them, while the other side was a chaotic blend of orange, pink, and yellow. It was a beautiful, clear evening, sadly perfect for the occasion as if trying to compensate for the loss of their teacher. After much walking, the staff finally arrived at a place near his hut where the forest meets the rolling green grounds, and looked upon a large, square hole in the ground with a slate gray rectangular box levitating over it. Without a word, they formed a line and walked to an area behind the coffin, forming a semi-circle around it, while the students stood in a low murmuring crowd on the other side, about five meters back. Everyone looked at the closed coffin, but their expressions varied. Some looked at it with fear and avoidance, others were already crying, some were blank, and still others looked careless and impatient (mostly the Slytherins). The teachers though all had one expression as they stood shoulder to shoulder, and that was a silent, strong reverence for their lost colleague. 

It came to Cassi's attention that Dumbledore had been standing beside Severus the entire time since they had arrived, but was now moving forward to stand at the edge of the hole, and just in front of the coffin. The crowd quieted immediately, and there was a silence that held in the air for a few minutes while each considered what was happening. Finally, Dumbledore spoke in his gentle yet powerful voice.

"My dear staff and students, you know why you are here today. Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry has suffered a great loss in the past week, as our gamekeeper, professor, and friend died at the hands of evil. Rubeus Hagrid led a remarkable life, and left a remarkable impact on our lives. 

"Both of his parents had passed from his life before his second year as a student here, before he was wrongly expelled. He came to be the groundskeeper of the school that way, and was more dedicated to this school than I know some professors and headmasters alike had been, because he loved this school more than some love their homes. This was his home, and it will be his home.  


"More than anything at this school, he loved to care for living creatures inside and outside the grounds. He was most taken with animals that magical people had long forsaken, because he found the good in everything. He had a special way with animals, and always treated them with kindness and love, because he thought that was the way everything that had been breathed life into ought to be treated. Even though he was often not treated as he treated others, this never stopped him from being kindly. He cared about his students because he could identify with every one of them. He made friends every year, and kept in touch with as many as he could after they had passed from the school. If anyone had a problem, Hagrid would be there to pat them on the back and encourage them, and if they needed help, he was there to try to guide them. If they needed defending, Hagrid was their loyal hero.

"The amount of love and kindness Hagrid had could hardly fit into his body. His lesson that he passed on to everyone was one of faith and hope. He was convinced that everyone had the potential to be good, and everyone had the ability to be the happiest person if they worked hard and had faith. It was through friendship, he believed, that all things could be achieved.

"I know some of you are asking why, why should a man so kind be taken so swiftly from our midst? The answer is that there is no reason why, because Hagrid's death was the byproduct of evil and ambition. While the beginning events of last week unfolded, Hagrid walked on the forests' edge, and was killed as servants of the Dark Lord carried out their duties. There is no one here to blame for his death. The only blame that can be placed is traced back to Voldemort himself. Our world does not want to believe he has returned, because it means accepting something very hard and very frightening to some people. The fear will only continue if we hide the truth. The death of Hagrid is like the death of Cedric Diggory; both died in the fight for truth and right, and both were taken away from us because Evil had other plans.   


"But in truth, they are not gone. A person is only truly gone when they are forgotten and unloved, and we will never forget Hagrid and his kindness, and we will love our memories of him for as long as we have them. He is not as lost as the Dark side would hope, because his lessons, life, and compassion are hard to forget. 

"I do not believe he would want you to mourn his death with sadness, loss, and tears, but rather he would want to celebrate his life. He wanted life to be enjoyed, and he would never be satisfied if he made life hard. Therefore, in our last respects to Hagrid, let your somber emotions remain here at his grave, and walk away with only fond memories and his touching morals. I will wait for the next quarter of an hour while you quietly say your good-byes to his body, and then he will be buried." Dumbledore's speech had been slow and purposeful, with pauses after each sentence so everyone could understand. About halfway through his speech, nearly everyone was crying or hanging their head, and many sniffles could be heard. Indeed, nearly all the staff had shed silent tears as their eyes remained trained on the gray stone coffin. Cassi had two quiet tears slip from her eyes, and she quickly wiped them away when the pause began. She looked up at Severus, who was concentrating hard on the crowd. He had no tears, but the blankness of his face told her that he was once again hiding everything, mourning in his mind where many a painful thought was held. 

A loud shriek resonated through the forest, followed by the cry of a thousand shrill voices, then a chorus of strange noises. Every head turned to the forest with concern, until Dumbledore said, "The animals grieve for their friend." Everyone then returned to their thoughts, sorting through memories of Hagrid, and some silently mouthing words as they seemed to talk to him, wishing him luck in the other world. When the sad silence had grown too heavy, Dumbledore straightened up again to speak.

"The time has come for us to say goodbye to the body of Hagrid. He will rest here forever, and he will be right here if you need to visit him. We bury his body tonight, but this coffin does not contain his spirit or the memories he has given you; those are yours to keep. Now, we say goodbye to Rubeus Hagrid, our fellow colleague and most of all, friend." Dumbledore whispered a few words of goodbye on his own, and it seemed that most everyone else was whispering goodbye as well. He then pulled out his wand from his pocket, and waved it once. The casket lowered into the hole until it could not be seen from where the crowd stood. Dumbledore then waved his wand once more, and clasped his hands together. A rumble could be heard as the earth shifted and groaned as it moved over the casket and covered the hole seamlessly with the dirt and grass until only a slight hill and a stone remained. The stone was a small rectangle engraved with his name, the date of birth and death, and a picture of a reared dragon, wings spread and clawing the air as it looked towards the sky.

Everyone stared at the hole, the crowd swaying some from standing too long. Sniffling and quiet whispers filled the air. The sun had fallen behind the trees now and their light was wanting as the dark purple velvet of the sky invaded into the smooth orange, stars beginning to twinkle.

"It is done. Prefects, please lead your students back to the dormitories, and will the Head Boy and Girl please follow behind the crowd? Thank you. The staff will remain here as you go. School resumes tomorrow as usual, and I will see you all tomorrow at breakfast, rested and hopefully more cheery. Goodnight my students!" he said, and the crowd began to shift and talk as the groups reassembled and began to trudge away. The mass of students thinned and thinned until eventually, one person was left standing as the Head Girl tried to usher him along.

"Alice, yes, that won't be necessary, I'll take Harry inside, thank you," Dumbledore said, and the Head Girl bowed slightly and rushed off to join the others. Harry Potter came forward, stopping shortly before the grave. Then, wordlessly, he pulled something out of his pocket and laid it next to the stone. It became clear that it was in fact a flute, a crude wooden flute whittled from a light brown wood. He looked after it for a moment, then looked up at everyone, realizing they were watching him.

"I was returning it," he explained and Dumbledore smiled, walked over to him and put a hand on his shoulder. They walked together to the castle, and most of the staff followed behind him, talking amongst themselves. Only Cassi and Severus remained behind.

She leaned her head on his upper arm when the people had gone and grasped his hand. "Do you need more time?" she asked in a quiet voice.

He tore his gaze from the headstone to her eyes, considering something. "No no, I'm ready to go back inside if you are," he replied steadily, sounding just as he always did.

"I am," she said, and she began to walk to the castle, but before she took her second step, Severus stopped her. He leaned down and kissed her gently, quickly placing a hand on the back of her neck and persuading her into the kiss. She touched the side of his face and traced his jaw line, then dropped her hand and stood back, shaking her head at him.

"Strange, strange," was all she said, taking up his hand to walk with him closely until they reached the castle. As Severus took a step forward though, a loud barking could be heard, and the sound of fast, light steps from behind them made Cassi turn around. "A dog on the grounds? It's certainly not Fang." She looked at it, confused.

"No," replied Severus, on the verge of misery and anger. "It is not. Just leave it be, it's a street mutt." Cassi looked harder at the dog. It was giant and black as night, but its eyes… they were a familiar shade of blue. It came to a stop in front of her, and sat obediently down, looking up at her pitifully and pawing her skirt hem. Panting slightly, the dog whined. "It's a stray, and it _will go away_ if it knows what's good for it."

"Severus," she said, amused and now very cautiously petting the dog's head, "You act like the dog has wronged you in a horrible manner!" The dog closed its eyes, enjoying the pat, and licked her hand.

"It has. Trust me, it's not worth your time," he replied, pulling slightly at her hand to get her to come. The dog, however, growled at him, baring white angry teeth, and transformed very rapidly into a tall, thin man.

"My family is just as old as yours, Severus Snape, I'm no street mutt," growled Sirius Black to him. Cassi shook her head.

"You're worse than my students, both of you. Hello Sirius," she said, first disciplining coldly, but embracing him and kissing him on either cheek. Severus scowled venomously as she dropped his hand to seemingly shower Black in affection. "Animagus, too? Impressive."

"Yes, ladies love me, human or not," he said winningly, and grinned. "Now, not to have interrupted you in that touching display of affection, but I barely had a chance to say goodbye when you _both_ rushed out of the room last night. Can't imagine what was so important. Anyway, I won't be at the next few summer meetings, Dumbledore's got a trip for me to go on. I shall see you Cassandra." He bowed elaborately, and she just smiled and rolled her eyes.

"Then we'll talk again come the end of summer, Sirius," she replied. He hugged her again and made a motion to leave without a word to Severus, but then turned back.

"And Snape?"

"What do you want, Black?" Severus said through gritted teeth.

"Take care of her for me, will you? I won't be gone too long." And with that, he transformed back into a dog, and scampered back into the forest. If dogs laugh, it was certainly what he was doing then.

Cassi grasped Severus' hand and entwined her fingers in his. "You know," she said as they walked, "There's always someone watching us to make sure you never love me in public."

"What do you think I was trying to do when I kissed you? I wanted to get rid of him!" he grunted sorely. She pushed his arm, but rest her head against his arm lovingly thereafter. 

When they got up to the castle steps, she looked at him wistfully, then released his hand. He continued through the door and she followed, shutting it behind her, then walked with him silently down the corridor, down the stairs, and to his room. He, of course, waited for her at his door so he could seal it and lock up, but she walked with him as he habitually made his rounds.

Wordlessly, they left his classroom and went to their chambers, getting their nightclothes on with a pensive silence. As Cassi walked out of the bathroom while brushing her hair (a much easier task now), she spied the back of Severus, sitting near the corner of the bed and facing the wall in front of him. His proud shoulders seemed slumped slightly, and he ran his fingers through his hair every so often. She set her brush back on the bathroom counter and moved silently across the floor, climbing onto the bed and embracing him from behind.

He felt her warm arms wrap around his waist and her face press into the back of his neck with tenderness. He straightened slightly, and he felt her shake her head. Her hands loosened their tight grip and moved to his shoulders, now pressing and kneading firmly. The tense and sore muscles in his shoulders relaxed, and he sensed a security and easiness in her touch, and closed his eyes. "What are you thinking about?" she whispered.

"The same as I was before."

"Hagrid, the Ministry, and Dumbledore? I believe only one of those three is troubling you at the moment, love." There was a pause.

"Maybe."

"Severus… there wasn't anything we could do. If we hadn't been captured then, it would have been later, and it would have been a different casualty. You'd still be sitting here, at this bed, blaming yourself for everything that happened. And I'd still be here, trying to drag what you mean out of one word answers and convince you that it wasn't your fault," she whispered to him in his ear, as if he could only hear her if she was quiet. Her hands moved down to the muscles near his bony spine and across his shoulder blades, pressing in small circles up and down his back.

He shook his head. "I could have easily told him to run straight off-"

"He wouldn't have listened, you know that. You'd blame yourself if a pillar in this school chipped."

"… I know. I… this is just how I… am." He finished his sentence weakly, and looked around the room.

"I love you for it," she sighed, and continued rubbing his back in silence. After he had stopped running through his pattern of nervous habits, she ceased her rhythmic movements and hugged his shoulders. "Let's go to sleep, you look tired." She took his hand from his knee and led him under the covers. He kissed her goodnight deeply once they had settled, snaked an arm around her narrow shoulders, and pulled her close.

"What would you do without me?" she murmured sleepily, smiling as he pressed his mouth to her neck.

"Pace. Quite a bit, I'd imagine," he replied in his deep rich voice, whispering against her skin. She fell asleep smiling.

~

The next week, the week the two professors had off, was surprisingly pleasant. Mornings were spent walking out on the grounds after breakfast, afternoons with grading papers, and evenings with reading. They stayed together for most of the time, never tiring of the other's company. Often, arguments or debates arose between then, giving their minds an exercise from the daily mix of things as everything from potions to the Ministry was heatedly discussed in hours-long conversations. Other times, they simply read in the presence of the other, or one would busy themselves while the other read. Even though both hated time off, they admitted it was not as hard as they thought it could have been had they been alone. It was the last week of bliss Severus had for a long, long time. 

The week after their quiet paradise was hectic. The students were becoming excitable with the coming of warmer weather, and school was less than two months from being out. The classes were becoming hard to control, but sobered immediately when the teachers brought up their exams. Cassi was continuing her lessons on the history of the Dark Lord, in spite of recent events. Her classes watched her with a nervous expectation, waiting for the day she would have some sort of emotional breakdown in the middle of her lessons due to horrible memories of her kidnapping. No such breakdown happened though, but everyone remained very sensitive to the topic until it was beginning to aggravate her.

"…And, thus was his rise to power. Now, does anyone have any questions before the bell rings?" she said as one class came to a close. Everyone shook their heads. "So you understand everything I just said then? No questions?" They shook their heads again, somewhat hesitantly. Cassi hopped off her stool with her gradebook in hand, her aire disinterested and cold. "Perfect, quiz next class then. It should be no problem for you experts."

"Oh no," was the general grumble of the class. The bell rang at that minute, and they collected their things and filed out of class in a gloom. Cassi watched them leave, and as soon as the last student was gone, she set her book down on the desk a little harder than she would have liked, and collapsed into her chair, feeling quite nauseous for the second time that day. 

"And a flu too, how lovely," she murmured bitterly to herself. She pulled out a stack of papers for her next class to work on, and began searching for her paperweight, wishing her next three classes would simply teach themselves so she could either curl up in bed and sleep. Unfortunately, Time has never made exceptions to its steady count, and the classes passed slowly. By dinner, she was feeling better, but still wanted out.

Locking up as quickly as possible, she shoved her keys into her pocket and raced down the hall, now late. When she came to the Great Hall, she felt ill again and walked up to the table with apprehension. Severus didn't acknowledge her presence for most of the meal (it kept rumors to a bare minimum), but when he noticed she had only eaten a few bites, he turned to her briefly and said, "You'll want to eat more than that if you want to keep your soul _in_ your body."

"Thank you, Health Instructor Snape, I'll keep that in mind. I don't feel well, for your information. Back off," she replied tartly, crossing her arms and pushing her chair back. She was stunned with how sharp she sounded. He raised an eyebrow, but said nothing for the rest of the meal. The Hall was buzzing with people talking and eating, a light clatter accompanying the sound. Severus put his fork down and backed his chair away from the table, rising and walking away from the table, Cassi following. Neither said a word until both were in the hallway and away from prying ears, which was not until they had reached the dank dungeons.

"Well," he said in an amused and menacing tone, "you seem in the brightest of moods."

She shook her head. "And yet you still comment."

"I always have a smart comment, according to you."

"You're digging a hole, Snape."

"Where does it lead?"

She turned to him. "A _permanently_ empty bed if you don't watch yourself professor!" she hissed. 

"Sleeping on the floor hurts my back, actually."

"Severus!" she said sharply as he opened his classroom door for her, and he smirked evilly.

"I should write books; _How to Annoy Women in Less Than Five Minutes_." He locked the door and moved to his potion's cabinet automatically, rearranging three bottles that seemed out of order.

"You most certainly could," she spat. He looked over to her, curious, and shut the cabinet doors slowly. He approached her and placed a hand on her forehead and on the back of her neck, checking her temperature, then gently pulled her forward and kissed her neck softly.

"You don't have a fever," he said quietly. "You could be getting sick though. I can give you something a preventing potion you want." His glance studied her eyes and expression, weighing her reaction.

She sighed. "No... I'll just go to bed, it will go away soon," she said apologetically, but he rolled his eyes when he heard her mention mysteriously vanishing symptoms. "What? It might."

"And if it doesn't, you have to go see Madame Pomfrey," he said, standing upright to seem imposing and now walking with a hand on her back.

"Ha. Fine, if it will make you happy."

"It will. I don't know how long I would remain alive if the mood you're in now continues," he said as they stepped through his office and down the hallway.

She rested her head against his chest. "I'm sorry about that, I didn't mean to come off as irritable," she replied.

"I found it amusing."

"I noticed." 

"_A How-to and Novel by Professor Severus R. Snape," _he dictated thoughtfully.

She laughed. "What does the R stand for?" she asked as they stepped into their room. A distasteful look flitted across his face.

"I'll tell you some other time..." She laughed again.

She didn't feel better when a week had passed though, so after much force and threats, Severus pushed her into a visit with the nurse, who gave her some pills that made the sick feeling fade. After that, she seemed fine, and had perked up considerably, so much that everything was back to normal… but that lasted only a few days. Three days later, Severus walked into their room late at night (he was grading a pop test he had given his unsuspecting and unprepared students) when he found Cassi lying on the bed cover, her eyes red rimmed and her face lightly blotchy. The lights were dimmed, but brightened as he walked into the room, casting a wave of light over her thin frame. Her mind seemed to be a thousand miles off as she stared blankly at him for a split-second.

"Severus!" she started, frightened considerably by the sight of him. "I-I didn't know you were done!" She sat up, covering her face with her hands briefly in a motion of distress.

"I just finished. Are you alright?" he asked, highly suspicious and concerned.

"Yes, of course I'm alright," she snapped, fidgeting with her robes, a sure sign she was not as fine as she said. "I'm just tired."

"I've yet to notice you so blotchy when you're tired," he said, sitting by her on the bed. She scowled, and stood to pace almost as he did when he had something particular on his mind.

"I'm not blotchy, and if I am then it's through no fault of my own," she said hurriedly.

"How convenient. What is this about?" he asked firmly. "Hagrid? Voldemort? The children? Or someone else?" 

She looked up at him with a quick, curious look, then shook her head. He returned the look with a stern, set face as she walked back to him, sighing as she sat on his lap and buried her face in his shoulder.

"I told you that I'm alright. I can handle myself, thank you very minutely," she said, now sounding more like her normal self instead of an angry witch. He put a hand on her back to comfort her, but she shook her head and stood up to get dressed for bed, stealing a quick kiss from him. He simply sat there as she walked off, slightly befuddled by what he had just witnessed, and wondering who he had just kissed.

After what had seemed to be some sort of emotional breakdown, a wall had been built between them. Cassi talked less, ate less, and spent less time with him. When he directed any conversation towards her, she grew nervous and flighty, often fidgeting and answering only what he wanted to hear. Often she would flinch when he made sudden movements, which only served to put him in a foul mood. This meekness grew into intolerance, and fights began to break out. It started as simple picking at a habit or opinion he had, and evolved into full out arguments, which left Severus thoroughly confused as to what they were fighting about. She spent her spare time in her classroom, and he rarely left his dungeons, so even breaks, which used to be savored with each other, were now working periods. Days would pass where they simply would not speak to each other, even though they shared the same bed at night. It was not always guaranteed she would be there when he woke up; she claimed she was going on walks in the mornings.

For awhile, he thought she was having some sort of post-traumatic stress problems, not able to cope with the events of her kidnapping. Then he wondered if she had fallen back on potion addiction, for her eyes seemed so lost and so dark. Indeed, her clothes were beginning to hang on her again, and she acted so oddly. A thousand other theories surfaced in his mind every time something was off-balance, but there was one theory he avoided… the one that nagged at him the most, and the one that hurt the most.

Things became over the top. They were fighting every day now. Cassi seemed cold and distant, as if he were holding her back from something. Severus had become increasingly bitter, as he so often did when he was trapped in situations he couldn't control or fix. It was hard to tell whether the fights or the ignoring was worse, but both were like sour injections into his body. She was gaunt and uncaring, and he was tired and cold. It had to stop.

Even some of the students had begun to notice a change in their teacher. There was one day in particular that stood out in Harry Potter's mind when he reflected on that month. It was towards the end of May, when lessons had begun to speed up quickly in hopes of cramming a little more into students' minds before the final exams. He had come to his first class of the day, Defense Against the Dark Arts, in hopes that it would be little more merciful than his irritable Potions class was, but instead found it a bit disturbing. 

Since the seventh years were taking practice exams this afternoon, the rest of the school was having a mixed day, which Dumbledore said would be good for them. All Houses had classes with each other, and everyone's normal schedule was changed. As Harry took his normal seat, he noticed a few familiar Gryffindor faces in the room, a few ok Hufflepuffs, and an assortment of Slytherins and Ravenclaws who did not look happy with this arrangement. And, upon further inspection, it was Draco Malfoy sitting in the middle of the table with Slytherins on both sides of him, looking around the room as if he owned it, and then glaring at Harry who sat directly in front of him. Thankfully, Hermione walked in a moment later than Harry, so he wasn't alone in class. 

"Harry! I didn't know we had a class together," she said as she threw her bag onto the table and began digging through it for her quill and parchment.

"Yeah, but I didn't know I'd be having Defense class with Draco either, so there you go," muttered Harry dryly.

Hermione looked up, her mouth a thin line. "Don't worry about him, he wouldn't dare speak out of turn in here." She procured her quill, inkwell, and parchment from the bag, then took her seat and waited patiently. Harry pulled out his notes from last time to scribble down a few things she said that were important. The bell sounded, but their teacher did not appear. The quiet whispers of the class got louder as their teacher became more tardy. 

Five minutes after the bell, Cassi stormed into the room through her office door and immediately busied herself with trying to find the roll for today. Hermione prodded him.

"Harry, is it just me or does she look sort of… tired?" she asked in a low voice. Harry nodded. "She's been looking that way for awhile."

"Preparing exams probably," he speculated with a careless aire, but Hermione knew he didn't really think that. She shrugged slightly, and turned her attention to listen to the new roll being called out.

"…and Zimmerman? Good. Now, settle down, we're going to start the lesson then I'll have you outline a scroll from the library that I duplicated for you. Don't groan, it will be on your exam. Where did we leave off again?" she asked, looking slightly uneasy.

"Muggle poisoning?" Hermione called out. She nodded.

"Right right. I'm going to cover Ministry action then," she moved to the board, and took up her chalk. Giving her notes a title, she scribbled a few things onto the blackboard and then turned around briskly. "With the first Muggle attacks, the Ministry was forced to declare a state of emergency, for the Dark community had jeopardized the secret of the wizards. If you'll recall, that was one of their objectives: that Muggles know of our existence and submit to us as inferior beings. With the declaration of the state of emergency, society was forced to accept the fact that there was an impending war and possibly a state of depression in our economy. However, once they had accepted this fact, the Ministry passed a series of Acts… what is it, Mr. Malfoy?" She crossed her arms, chalk still in hand, and the class turned their attention to Draco, who put his arm down (which he had been waving in the air in a cruel impression of Hermione) and leaned back in his chair.

"I was wondering when we'd get to the good stuff," the boy said, drawling his words out in a whining manner.

"Good stuff? Of which event are you referring to as good?" she asked incredulously.

"The part where Harry Potter saves the day, of course!" he said with enthusiasm, and all the Slytherins and Ravenclaws burst out laughing.

Cassi glared and the class quieted. "First off, the end of his reign won't be covered for another 2 weeks. Secondly, five points from Slytherin for disrespect," she said in a voice that seemed to yell but was barely above a whisper.

"You know, you sure do know a lot about Dark happenings," he called out, and the class went dead silent instantly. "Did Voldemort review you while you were gone?" No one was laughing now, it was a battle of the wills between Cassi and Draco.

"I was alive during most of this time period. I've also done extensive studies on this subject, and it is my business to know, as it is my business to teach you. Mr. Malfoy, sit quietly and see me after class," she said, and turned back the board.

"Or maybe you didn't need reviewing-"

"I will be taking this up with your Head of House," she said, her back still turned as she wrote a few more things on the board.

"Oh please, you won't even talk to him anymore, what happened, you break up with him or something?"

"Draco Malfoy, leave my classroom immedietly. I believe you and the Headmaster need to have a talk," she thundered, looking hurt only for a second before her steely demeanor overtook her.

"Make me," he called out, standing.

"As you wish, _ambulo itio Dumbledore_! Goodbye Mr. Malfoy," she said, drawing her wand and hitting him with a spell. Immediately, his feet began shuffling him to the door, and he scowled as he was lead out of the classroom.

The moment after his quick departure was tense. Cassi put her wand back in her sash and turned back to the chalkboard, not writing anything, simply standing with the chalk in her hand, staring at the board. The class fidgeted. Finally, she brought a hand to her face to pinch the highest point of the bridge of her nose with her index finger and thumb, then turned back to the class, sterner and colder than ever. "The Walking Curse; it takes them anywhere they need to be. Maybe a little too advanced for this age level, but with practice it's not too hard to master… we'll save these notes for another day. Outline the following handout," she said monotonely, and she took up a stack of papers from her desk and passed them out. After everyone had their copy, she sat down at her desk and busied herself in her gradebook.

Harry, who was avoiding her glance during the entire episode, immediately began taking quick notes from the parchment, writing down dates, names, and a few important underlined lines from the passages. A few people began whispering again, until there was a quiet murmur as they worked. In the middle of his task though, Hermione prodded him again, then glanced at their professor so he would follow her gaze. Professor Talin was staring blankly at her gradebook, sometimes covering her eyes with her hands.

"Malfoy's a jerk," he said to Hermione.

"I know he is, Harry… but what he said had truth to it. Look at how she reacted. Haven't you seen Professor Snape and Professor Talin in public lately?" she whispered.

"Hermione, they don't mean it when they fight," he replied.

"They don't fight anymore. They don't talk, and she'll walk through long halls to avoid passing him," she whispered fervently. "If you ask me, it sounds like something's not right."

Harry shrugged. "I dunno, I really don't. If you-" But he stopped midsentence as a third year walking into the classroom, carrying a note which she handed to their teacher dutifully. Talin read the letter, as color drain from her face. 

"Tell the professor not to bother with coming upstairs, and that I have dealt with it accordingly," she told the third year, who nodded and scampered out of the room. Cassi leaned back in her chair now, looking most ill.

"You might be right, Hermione," Harry said. "Yeah. Definitely."

And she was, for Harry witnessed almost exactly what Hermione had described later that afternoon, and again at dinner. Now the students sometimes brought this up with their closest friends, designing theories as to what went wrong in the relationship between a cruel Potions teacher and a cold Defense professor.

***

The month of May had passed in an increasing worse fashion, and finally, Severus had had enough. After enduring a month of weird behavior, he finally had reached the limit of being pushed away. Therefore, knowing she would come to his rooms for a stack of homework papers during break, he planned a confrontation. Grumpy and in a foul mood, he harassed his students over their poor Coloring Concoctions until the bell rang.

"Don't think that that slipshod work will get you through the exam, Baker. And you, Miss Gardner, come prepared for class once in your life!" he called out as his students quickly fled out the door and down the hall. Tired, he walked over to his desk, threw down his gradebook, and seated himself at his desk, waiting for Cassi to walk through the door. He felt pensive and nervous, and the realization of these vulnerable feelings created dark thoughts in his mind. 

Exactly on cue, she slipped through the door and avoided his glance. He waited for her to get to his rooms, then started after her quickly and burst through his doors and down the short hallway.

"Cassandra," he said firmly when he entered his bedroom. She looked up at him almost knowingly.

"Severus?"

"Let's talk."

"What about?"

"Don't play those games with me, Cassi. I'm not even sure where to begin. In the past month, your behavior has been alarming sporadic. You do not talk to me, you barely eat, you avoid me at all costs, and we fight incessantly. This morning it was about a scroll. One single, solitary scroll. Yesterday it was Harry Potter. The day before, it was Longbottom. In the mornings you're off somewhere, and in the evenings, you escape to the library. Take your pick as to where you'd like to start." He crossed his arms across his chest, and she, standing beside the desk, collapsed back into the wooden chair, the color draining from her face.

"Severus, I…" She was at a loss for words, shaking her head at something. Silence hung so thickly in the air as the events of the past month replayed themselves in their minds. He walked over to her and knelt down in front of her, gripping her chair.

"You're hiding something, just tell me what it is," he asked searchingly.

"I can't," she murmured coldly. "I can't… I've tried. I can't."

"I don't see why you can't, and this is the problem. You're not the same person you were at the beginning of the month."

"Yes, I am."

"I swear you are not! You act like you can not stand me! I've gotten more positive attention from Aurors than you!"

"Severus! That's not true-" 

"It is!"

Before even realizing what was taking place, she had flung her arms around his neck and was kissing him furiously, running her hands through his hair. Somewhere between confusion and relief, he wrapped his arms around her gently and held her close as familiar feelings crept back into his icy heart. The next instant, she tore herself off him, apologizing and half-frightened, her eyes darting to the door and then to her hands, which she wrung nervously. He gripped her arms tightly before she could run off and held her still, his frustration peaked.

"This is what I mean! _What is happening to you_?" he thundered.

"Nothing!" she snapped back, her anger matching his in no time. "_Nothing at all_! Nothing _you'd _care to know about, lest you cast me out! You don't even know what's going on, when it's so _obvious_! You don't _care _enough to know!"

"Know what? What are you talking about?" he yelled. "You speak of things I don't understand!"

"You wouldn't understand, even if I told you! If you did know, you'd kill us both!" She gasped at what she had said. Struggling with him to free herself, tears began to pour down her cheeks, and she refused to look at him.

"_What did you say_?" he asked incredulously, unable to comprehend the meaning of her words. He wondered faintly if he sounded as crazy as he felt. "What did you say? Who is 'us'?"

"I said nothing, let me go! Damn you, let me go! Ow, let go!" she said sharply as his grip on her arms tightened. He released her, startled at her anger towards him and at his bruising grip on her and she stood up blearily, shoulders shaking. Furiously, she glanced back at him, then started off running down the corridor, slamming doors behind her and scrolls abandoned.

Shocked, he looked around the still room for several seconds after the confrontation. The chair she had sat in was overturned, but everything else seemed normal, too normal for this to be some horrible nightmare. He pulled himself to his feet and walked to the bed, sitting on the edge and turning things over in his mind. _'If you did know, you would kill us both!' _ _Both? Her and I?… or her and someone else? Someone… who has replaced me in her eyes. There is another. Of course. The walks, the fights, the avoidance… why couldn't I see it before? How ignorant am I? Of course. Of course. _

__

"Oh God no," he murmured desperately, looking around._ "God, please don't let it be."_

~

This is the part where you review. With the review button. Go on, tell me how much you despise/love my cliffhangers, and how much you'll all chop me up into little pieces if I mess with my characters. Hey, don't laugh, someone has told me that. Review.


	11. The Bitter Taste of Misery

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Author's Note: HA! I did it, and there should be another chapter too, before OotP. Ok, here's how this is going to go down: I publish this today (duh), there will be one chapter just before or around the release of OotP, then one more chapter after that to wrap things up, and finally, an epilogue. Now the story truly ends with the last _chapter_, for the epilogue… I've not decided how it goes, so far it's a scramble of scenes, and I can't decide whether to narrate what happens loosely or show these scenes in detail… It might just be a collection of scenes from their futures. I dunno, but the true end of the art is in the last chapter.

Alright people, I managed a chapter in about two weeks. Be proud, read and review. It can be done! You know, I think this chapter is pretty mild… hardly any swearing either… wow. I'm impressed with myself. Well, so all of you that have your hands over your eyes and ears can come out and peek at this mild chapter. And review after peeking!

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Chapter 11: The Bitter Taste of Misery

That night, sleep did not find Severus Snape. The disturbing argument he had had with Cassandra earlier that day was still resonating through is mind, but the one phrase that resurfaced the most was "If you did know, you'd kill us both!" This simple sentence revealed three things about her mysterious actions that month. The first was obvious; even through her denials of nothingness, there was in fact something to be hidden. The second was the fact that her secret was heavy enough that he would kill her for it, despite that he would never entertain the thought for a second. And the third and most disturbing was that there was an unknown 'us'; a rather powerful 'us' that was stated in such a way that could not simply be himself and her. It was Severus' nature to then assume that he wasn't in the 'us' because it was now someone else's job.

Severus rolled over in bed, irritated at his inability to sleep. _Or_, he reasoned, _my inability to maintain her fancy._ Kicking off the covers, he pulled himself out of bed and began pacing around his room, occasionally reaching his hand out to touch the corner of the chair as he passed it. She, of course, would not be coming to bed tonight, or any other night, as she had presumably taken up her place in her old room. He growled.

Tracing back in his mind, he tried to remember when this had started. As far as he knew, everything was perfectly fine until the day he had come into their rooms to find her upset for reasons she wouldn't tell him. Their relationship had gone from day to night in one evening, the sun seemingly setting on their passion in less than an hour. He couldn't think of one thing to right it or one thing that had happened to make it take this sudden downward turn. He was at a dead end, and withdrew from the battle, resigning to his former life.

He had known from the very beginning that he would have never been able to keep her, because she was good, and good things simply did not come his way. He had almost been certain that this time it would be different, that her regard for him had matched his own (even though he found that hard to believe as well). But no, it could not be. It had been most right of him when he had sized himself up correctly last fall; he wasn't getting any younger, he was certainly less than attractive, and owing to his reputation as a cruel and uncaring man, he was surprised she stayed with him as long as she did. If he had listened to his own good advice, he would have spared both of them a lot of heartbreak and danger. 

Tapping the chair, he drew his eyebrows together in concern, then relaxed them in acquiescence. He sat at his desk, rapping his fingers against the surface in thought, then pulled out a piece of parchment and began redesigning the final exam to keep himself busy. Having mentally reduced himself to nothing more than an insignificant, uninteresting man with an unsuitable temper, he worked all morning on the exams, achieving nothing more than designing two dozen mind-boggling questions and further breaking his spirit. 

~

The next morning was hell. Throwing on some different robes at around six, he proceeded through his morning routine without thinking. He spent the rest of the time in his office, straightening bottles and dusting them, for he had long neglected his potion bottles' care in light of recent events. He had to keep himself busy, he had to keep his hands from being idle and he had to concentrate on his work, or he would dwell on things that would only further upset him.

By the time he had set down a violently green jar with one strand of hair floating in the center, he was nearly late for breakfast. Hurriedly, he walked with long strides out of his room, pattered up the steps, and sped down the corridor to the Hall, where several students were meandering out of the doors and going in the general direction of their next class. He pushed through them while rolling his eyes, made his way to his place at the table, and seated himself. Next to him, a plate sat empty, the silverware not a centimeter out of place, and the goblet unstained.

"Has Professor Talin been down to breakfast?" he inquired of a rising teacher.

"No," replied the teacher before hastily bustling off. "Haven't seen her all morning."

Shaking his head, he began eating breakfast… possibly the only good part of his entire day.

Directly after a rushed breakfast, he had second year Hufflepuffs (an especially incompetent group), followed by seventh year Slytherins (not as bad as those damned Hufflepuffs), and then his break, followed by fourth year Ravenclaws (still not as bad as the Hufflepuffs, though rather smug). Then he had lunch.

At this meal, Cassandra actually beat him there, eating quickly to leave the area. As Severus was sitting down, he considered saying something to her, but turned his eyes from her and stared hard at his food, stealing glances at her every now and then.

God, it hurt. She looked unwell, it was obvious but… she was so beautiful. Her pained lavender-light blue eyes peered around the Hall wistfully, framed in heavy lashes and red-rimmed eyelids. A permanent blush was fixed on her cheeks, no doubt from the stress of crying, and the corners of her pouty mouth were level, neither smiling nor frowning, just… being. Severus berated himself for not being able to cure her of her sadness, though it appeared the other man wasn't doing so well either. With a second of hope, he thought that if the other man failed miserably, she might come back, but he immediately pushed the thought out of his mind. He didn't even know who this man was, though Severus was not inclined to befriend this man even in another life. 

Silently, he finished his meal, avoiding her eyes completely from then on. It hurt too much to look at her, and he hated himself for letting it hurt. He felt so entirely downtrodden though that she could have turned to him, punched him in the face, and he would be grateful for the attention.

Without thinking, he stood from the table and stormed out of the room, not able to sit there any more. Besides, more bungling Hufflepuffs were next in class, and he had to make sure he had enough of the counter-potion in store to suffice half of them. Counter-potions kept his mind off her.

Severus wove through the hall and dungeon expertly, slammed into his empty room, and shut the door behind him, though he heard a creak from behind him moments later. Turning, he saw the doorframe was tilted and the door did not fit in it right, and the sudden memory of when this last occurred played before his eyes. She had come to tell him there was a Defense meeting in her cold and usual manner while he had Harry Potter in detention, but she pulled him out to the hallway and … no. No more. _It's not sensible to reminisce like this. _Severus reached up and gave the frame a good thump with the heel of his hand, righting the wooden frame and allowing the door to fit snugly into it. He stalked to his shelves and took inventory of his counter-potions, counting twenty-two medium sized flasks of basic counter-potions. Damn, it was plenty, so there was no luck in busying himself to needlessly make more. Drumming his fingertips on the shelf, he then turned away and sat down at his desk, easing himself into the chair as his muscles began to ache from an entire night's lack of sleep.

He sifted mindlessly through papers on his desk, until he came across a thick book underneath a stack. Curious, he flipped it over and read the title from the dingy blue cover, _Potente Potions._ Automatically, he flipped the potion number 585, Anxiety Relief potion. Staring at the page, he allowed his mind to wander back to the time he first realized her addiction to this potion, and how he cradled her in his arms. Slamming the book shut, he swiftly put it away alphabetically on his bookshelf, not allowing himself to look over it a moment longer. He was lucky though, the students were arriving.

A crowd of sixth year Hufflepuffs walked into the room, talking at the tops of their voices about the final Quidditch match that was to be held in a little over a week. Unimpressed, Severus ordered them to take their seats in a quiet fashion as another group came in behind them.

"I'm well aware of the fact that the Quidditch match is Hufflepuff versus Gryffindor, but while you're in my dungeons, your concentration is solely on your work," he hissed to a now dead silent class. "Today we will be brewing a very simple potion that heals bruises, something I hardly think to be beyond your level as it's entirely herbal, though I have no doubts you will have trouble with it all the same. Start by copying the notes off the board, and then begin brewing. At the end of the hour, three potions will be tested, so make sure someone's doing it right for once. If in the likely event you do end up poisoning one another, I have the counter-potion… well, why aren't you copying the notes down?" Immediately everyone scrambled to pull out parchment and began taking messy notes so as to have time to finish the potion. He sat down at his desk, watching everyone carefully as their heads bobbed up and down to get the notes. After about fifteen minutes, the clunking of cauldrons was heard and the catching of fires roared softly through the room. The student cabinet was open and shut several times, and soon bubbling potions were echoing around the room.

He stood and walked slowly around the room, observing everyone as they worked and scolding a student every few desks. "It's vervain, _then _arnica, Miss Steele!" he would comment. "No no no Peters, you'll blow us all up if you do that. Turn the fire down. Well, Mr. Sullivan, that's perfect… if you want to have one less Hufflepuff in your House." He made his rounds and wandered back to his desk, exhaling loudly and picking up his quill to create more questions for his test. He looked up every now and then to silence a pair of Hufflepuffs with venomous glances, but mostly kept his eyes on his work. However, when he ran out of ideas, he would look up and around his room for a bit of inspiration. This only served to bring back memories.

At first it was a student's cauldron. A sudden flash before his eyes forced his mind into remembering when she came to his classroom to brew her godforsaken potion, almost as meticulous as he is in her brewing. He had stood over her, watching the potion and her with interest, and when he automatically suggested a different way of stirring and took her hand in his, she began shaking like a nervous bird, unsure of what to do. Ah, but she had said his name. Abruptly, he interrupted this train of thought and brought his mind back to the present.

Upon searching for the right phrasing of another question, he looked to a desk and was taken back to the night when Cassi killed Donovan. He walked her down to his dungeon where he knew she would be safe, then gave her a potion. Upon insisting she stay there while he helped Dumbledore, she fell asleep at a desk. He always loved watching her sleep.

Quickly, he stood and walked into his office without a word to his students, locking the door behind him and leaning back against a wall. His hands were running through his hair, over his chin, and crossing his arms several times before he was content with his state of mind. He wouldn't allow himself to think like that, it was detrimental to his state of health. Not only that, but remembering her wouldn't change his current situation. He cursed himself quietly for not being more stable. Finally, he unlocked the door and walked out, sitting out the remainder of class.

Twenty minutes before the bell sounded for the change of classes, he chose three students to test the potions on, and three potions. Both the makers of the potions and the takers were shaking with nervousness, but nothing went wrong as each student was given a magically induced bruise, then watched it vanish (much to Snape's disappointment, although he was mildly amused at the frightened look of the class as each drinker became translucently pale, then restored to their normal color). The bell rang and everyone rushed to clean up and get out of the dungeons with one more class period that day to help them forget Potions. Severus was still barking orders to students as the last class of the day left his room.

That evening, after a fast dinner with minimal interaction with the rest of the staff, Severus locked the doors to his classroom and wandered through the short hallway to his bedroom. Upon entering, he smelled the faint mint he was so familiar with, and knew Cassi had been back to grab a few things. There were books and papers here and there that were gone, and a few personal articles of hers were missing. He did spy something however, that was out of place. On the pillow of his bed was the pendant he had given her so many years ago, the iron snake wrapped around a heart. Next to it was a note, which Severus took up slowly and read aloud.

"_Severus, it didn't feel right having this after yesterday. I'm sorry, signed Cassi,_" he said in a quiet voice, taking the pendant into his palm and wrapping his fingers over it. He sat back on the bed, thoughtful, and let the note slip to the ground, now only gripping the pendant. He closed his eyes and sighed, then put it down and begrudgingly got ready for bed and his much-neglected sleep.

This carried on for three days, this sort of morose, robotic routine, when on that Saturday as Severus worked at his desk in his classroom, a light knock was heard at the door. Instantly knowing who it was, he called for her to come in, and in stepped Cassi, looking nervous.

"I suppose you've come to officially move your things out of the room," Severus said while not looking up from his parchment he was writing on.

"Yes," she answered, not knowing exactly what to say.

"Go ahead, tell me if you need help with anything," he replied in a monotone voice. She nodded and walked past him, hesitating when she was about half a meter from him, enough so that he glanced over at her. She turned away though and disappeared through the passage, reappearing half an hour later with a small bag of things, probably many of them shrunk to fit into the bag. He watched her step out of the door and back into the classroom.

"Did you find everything?" he asked flatly.

"Yes, I did. Severus… I'm…. sorry I'm doing this," she said with effort, gazing down at the floor with her eyes full of sorrow.

"Then why are you doing it?" he asked now looking over at her.

"I have to, I have to. It's the only way," she said ardently.

"And you're still not going to tell me why, I imagine, even though I've spent many nights trying to figure you out?" he asked, a little more warmth coming into his voice.

"Not yet, not just yet," she replied.

"Yes, well, schedule me in when you can. I'll be right here, as always," he said tartly. She turned to go, clutching the bag so tight in her hands that her knuckles turned white. "It would at least be a bit easy on the mind if I knew who," he called out after her, and she turned around, face twisted with puzzlement.

"What are you talking about?" she asked.

"Who. I was simply referring to who the 'us' is in 'If you did know, you'd kill us both,'" he replied.

"Severus, I didn't mean tha-"

"It sounded as if you did. Who is the 'us'?" His voice was never raised above a normal speaking voice, and it was hard to decide whether it was more defeated or bitter.

"I didn't mean it. I'm half out of my-"

"Do you love him?"

"What?"

"Do you love him? It's a simple enough question."

Cassi looked stricken suddenly, then composed herself. "Severus, do you think I'm having an affair?" 

"Well, it's not technically an affair anymore, as you did just move out."

"It is too! You think I'm cheating on you!" She dropped her bag on the ground and put her hands on her hips.

"I didn't believe it at first, but honestly Cassi, if you were in my position, what would you think?" Severus steepled his fingers together, setting his hands on his desk.

Cassi stopped and glared. "I'd probably think no different than you have," she replied and took up her bag from the floor, walking to the door. She left without looking back at him.

Slapping his hands to his face, he paused like this, then peeked out them to the door. No, she still was gone. He slammed his fist against the desktop, then took up his quill and worked furiously into the night. 

Soon, his work was ritualistic, as he stayed up late several nights writing and reading, pulling things from memory and designing difficult questions. His work became his obsession; he worked to fill the void. Rarely did he leave his dungeons, and sometimes took his meals in there, enslaved to his work.

The entire school was becoming hyped as the end of the year approached. Though exams were closing in, the promise of freedom hung in the warm air, and several students would look out longingly at the green grass, wishing it was beneath their feet instead of the stone floors. Not only did the end of the school year mean exams, it also meant Quidditch. This year's Gryffindor team was on fire; they hadn't lost a game yet, and though the Hufflepuffs had greatly improved, they were still going to be no match for the Gryffindors. And a week after the Quidditch Cup was awarded, there was one last Hogsmeade visit, just before the week of exams. Even as eventful as this month was, Severus wanted nothing to do with anyone. He did not talk to the other staff members (except when forced to at staff meetings), and he was outright cruel to his students. Dumbledore sometimes came down to visit him, talking of school happenings and silly resolutions passed by the Ministry of Magic. They never touched on anything more personal than that, but Severus appreciated it all the same.

Classes carried out through the week with more and more struggle as the students grew rowdy. Only a few teachers still maintained control of their classes and kept them sobered enough to learn more. Severus maintained this kind of control of his classes by scolding and severity, while Cassi kept them busy with days worth of work in one class period. However, by the time the last bell rang on Friday, Severus was ready for them to be out of his hands because he had several things to do if he wanted to have the exams prepared by two weeks time. They were shaping up quite nicely, probably one of the hardest exams he had given yet, and making seven of them (one for each grade level) was no easy task. However, this year, he had thought, it will be a good assessment of what they know. The test would be given on the day of exams, and then they would brew a potion the class period before exam week. 

It was therefore with a heavy heart that he left his work to go to the Quidditch match on Saturday morning. He woke up with a groan and rolled over in bed, convincing himself that if he did not attend, no one would notice. Except Dumbledore. Sighing, he sat up, then stood slowly and walked to the bathroom to take a shower. After getting dressed in his usual black robes, he stalked out of his room and marched over to the Great Hall, where breakfast was half-empty with people already rushing outside. He dodged around them and went up to the High Table, where the entire staff sat talking excitedly of the game. All, except Cassi, that is. He walked up to the table and sat down in his chair, picking up his fork and concentrating on his food. Eventually, a few teachers around him asked him what team he thought was going to win, but he replied with a grunt and rolling of his eyes, so most knew he thought it was Gryffindor.

By the time he had finished his eggs, the staff was looking as restless as the children, so they stood up in unison when most of the students had gone and filed out across the grounds. It was a lovely day with a slight breeze; the sun was shining, the grass was crisp and green, and no clouds darkened the sky. Severus already despised that day. He could see a crowd already forming outside the pitch, waiting to get in, and he was grateful the teachers sat in their own box and not amongst the students. The staff walked amidst the crowd of students through an opening, then veered away from them and up a flight of wooden steps to their box. In front of him walked Cassandra and Minerva, talking in low voices about something, but he heard Hogsmeade in the conversation a few times, and assumed Minerva was trying to recruit her for the next trip. At the top of the stairs he turned down the hallway and into the box, finding a spot out in the back near the corner. From there he had a good view of the pitch, and no one would sneak up on him, clap him on the shoulder and declare it was 'a fine day indeed' when in reality, rain would have suited Severus far better. Watching the referee enter onto the grass with her broom, he caught a snippet of conversation in front of him.

"No no, I've been writing to him lately. We've been corresponding for a month now." That was Cassi's voice, to be sure.

"So you'll be meeting him there?" was McGonagall's reply.

"Yes."

"Good for you, good for you."

"Severus," hissed a suave voice from beside him, and he turned to see Professor Trelawny in all her elaborate mystique and shawls sitting next to him closely. "I saw the most interesting thing while crystal gazing last night, and it involved you and an unknown shadowy figure."

"Really?" he drawled, unnerved at being interrupted while he was eavesdropping. When he looked back to Cassi, both of the women had finished their conversation and were watching the Quaffle being thrown up into the air as the game began. Gryffindor immediately took possession of the ball and became red blurs in the air.

"Yes, yes! It was most disturbing! I was sitting up in my tower, doing my evening gazing when I saw your face arise in the crystal as clearly as ever! You can imagine my shock, because I only see your face when it's associated-"

"With my horrible demise, I know," Severus said, paying attention to the game now and only scarcely hearing her over the roar of the crowd. Hufflepuff had captured the Quaffle and was weaving it back to their hoops. There was a player clad in red swiftly approaching though, and if they did not move the ball faster, it would not be theirs for very long. "Sibyll, are you sure this isn't like the last time? I've yet to drowned by a hoard of dragons."

"No! This is entirely different!"

"I'm sure." The Gryffindors stole the Quaffle, flew back, and scored ten points. It looked like the two Seekers were dashing after something too, but it soon became obvious that the Hufflepuff Seeker was faking the dive. "At any rate, I'd rather not know what hideous end I'm to meet this time. It's best not to know."

"But don't you want to prevent it?"

"Would that not prove you wrong? Surely you don't _want_ that." As much as Professor Trelawny annoyed him, he found befuddling her just as amusing.

She scowled and turned away, muttering something about Fate striking him down at that very moment. He put his elbow on his knee and rested his chin in his palm, watching the game play out extremely favorably for the Gryffindors. Landslide game, really. Try as the Hufflepuffs might, the Gryffindors always had about a thirty point lead on them, with the Seekers battling it out for the elusive Snitch.

Severus' eyes wandered from the game, landing on the raven-haired girl in front of him without consulting his mind if they were allowed to do so. Every now and then, Cassi would put her hands to her head and stare at the ground, then look back up at the game. Forcibly, he lifted his eyes to see Hufflepuff score, but their triumph lasted a second too long and Gryffindor took possession of the Quaffle and began barreling down the field. Eventually, another Hufflepuff ran straight into the Gryffindor, and a foul was called. The crowd booed loudly.

"What's the name of that foul?" Cassi asked McGonagall.

"Hmm…. It's been awhile since we've seen that. Severus?" she asked, now turning around to look up at him. "What foul was called?"

"Blatching, flying with the intent to collide," he said gruffly.

"That's right, that's right. You still remember all those terms too, it's quite amazing," she said warmly, and then turned to Cassi. "You know, he used to announce for the games back when he was in school. Such accurate descriptions of the plays, and he was never out of line on the magical microphone. What a nice few years those were." McGonagall looked pointedly at the student announcer who was making hasty comments about the blatant fouling of the winning team.

For the briefest moment, he thought he saw Cassi's eyes light up at this, but her usual sharp look had returned by the time he noticed it. The game started up again as the Gryffindor penalty shot whooshed through the hoop and the Keeper handed it off to a yellow Chaser. Hufflepuff had come back into the game, and was now trailing by a mere twenty points. As soon as it looked like Hufflepuff had a shot at winning, the Gryffindor Seeker shot off through the middle of the field. Flying in corkscrew twirls, he zipped through the air at blurring speeds, then slowed, fist raised in the air in triumph. In his fist was a small flapping ball that glittered in the sun. The game was over, Gryffindor had won yet again, and the crowd was cheering. Grimly, Severus stood with the others as both teams made a victory lap and then shook hands, floating slowly back to the ground only to be surrounded by Housemates. He had seen it before, and he would see it again. These thrilling victories never had even the shelf life of some of the simplest potions; the feelings of it were quite short-lived. Severus followed the mass of people (Professor Trelawny shooting dark, pitiful glances at him every so often) out of the box and into the hallway that would lead them down to the mass of shouting students. It was giving him a headache, really. 

He was pondering his headache when a small figure collided with the back of him, and he turned to see Cassi stepping back from him looking dizzy and overwhelmed.

"Sorry," she muttered, shaking her head. "Tripped."

"Don't bother yourself with it," he replied shortly, now heading down the stairs, looking around for someone before they disappeared off. Reaching the bottom, he looked back up the stairs and caught a glimpse of McGonagall just as she was nearly down the stairs. He wove a little through the crowd, putting himself in the perfect place to intercept her, and caught the old woman's arm as she passed. "Watch after Cassi, she's unwell," he whispered in her ear, then let go and disappeared into the crowd of students as they left the stadium. 

Cleverly, he concealed himself behind a bit of shrubbery and listened as a small stream of people headed back to the castle, while others remained outside for awhile. After waiting some time, he finally heard the voices he was listening for.

"I swear I'm fine Minerva," said Cassi, sounding slightly unnerved.

"Well we'll have Madame Pomfrey look at you all the same," answered the older witch. "You're rather pale."

"I'm _naturally_ pale," retorted Cassi.

"We'll see, we'll see." The voices trailed off.

Severus pressed his fingertips to his temple, his headache growing. How he _hated_ weekends.

The next weekend was no better than the last, if not worse. After much pressure from McGonagall, he had agreed to accompany the children to Hogsmeade on Sunday morning, even though he had stated openly that he had much to do for exams the next day and the following days after. He had given in more to his curiosity than his sense of duty, but had convinced himself it was more about the latter than the former. Therefore, he found himself standing in the Entrance Hall bright and early Sunday morning as several, excitable students (who should have been studying for his exam) milled around him. Professor Talin was standing on the other side of the hall, her arms crossed and her hood up on her traveling cloak as she leaned again the wall. McGonagall stood at the head of the group, and when she decided that enough students had arrived, she looked over her roll and then the crowd briefly, then signaled that they could go. The crowd began moving forward and Severus walked near the back and to his side, immediately scolding a pair of rowdy boys for disturbing the people around them. He kept his eyes flickering towards Cassandra though as they traveled on foot to the village, watching her movements and hand gestures as she conversed stiffly with a seventh year.

When the group did finally arrive at the village, they dispersed from their large pack into several groups, spreading through the street and leaving the teachers standing around, watching them off, and then leaving the street themselves. Severus hung back, watching Cassandra out of the corner of his eye as she looked around, then slipped down an alleyway. Not sure if he should go after her, he followed her path from a reasonable distance, just to see where she was headed. It wasn't like he was going to spy on her… he was just curious. Cassi turned right in the alleyway, and came out on a little street corner away from a lot of the hustle of the inner city. Cautiously, Severus followed and stood behind a staircase as he watched Cassi approach a man also cloaked in black. Angrily, Severus sneered to himself as the two embraced warmly, kissed the other's cheeks, and she flung her arms around his neck.

"Ah! It has been too long!" he heard her say.

"Only most of my life," the man replied in a thick Russian accent, contrasting with Cassi's light accent worn smooth by years spent here. He put an arm around her waist loosely and they began to walk in a slow, steady manner, with nowhere particular to go.

From this angle, Severus could better see that he was a younger man with blonde hair and blue eyes, a rather Cossack look about him, though he stood tall and slender under his cloak. He seemed friendly enough though, but for this Severus hated him all the more.

"Practically," she replied, smiling more than he had seen her do so in nearly two month's time. "Speak to me in our language, it's easier for you." He smiled down at her and spun off a long string of things Severus couldn't understand, and the two walked off, now speaking in a language he never thought he would understand.

Severus straightened himself and headed back the way he had come, arms folded across his chest and his eyes set on the ground as he thought to himself. So this was him, was it? Some handsome young man. No, he refused to believe it. It did not seem like her at all. Then again, a lot of her actions lately did not seem like her. Now in a very foul and depressed mood, he turned out of the alleyway and wandered aimlessly around.

In all his life, he'd never been so confused. He hated confusion, things ought to be evident at all times, and if they weren't obvious, then the solution or problem should at least be clear, thus proving a way to fix it. But this, this was in a class of its own. It was as if the Cassi he knew had got in the bad way of a Mind Switching curse and was now a completely different person. He would suspect that too if it hadn't been for those brief moments when he saw her true self shine out from behind the mask. It grew more disheartening by the day. Thinking that he should go back to the castle to do some work on the exams, he started off in that direction. He halted after a few steps though and remembered that he had had the tests ready for some time, and he really did not have anything to do at the castle. Everything in his room had been cleaned, organized, re-organized, filed, catalogued, graded and prepared. Unfortunately, trying to distract himself only made him an extremely diligent worker, and he had run out of distractions.

With nowhere to be and nothing to do, Severus looked around. Maybe he'd go sit in the bar for awhile and scoff at people. Deciding it was his best course of action, he turned and headed towards the bar. Several students were coming in and out of shops, bags full of wastes of money, chattering with their friends and enjoying themselves. Severus was nearly eager to see those smiles wiped right off when he dropped the exam on their desk and they realized they should have spent that time studying. This generation's students were slackers to the letter, and he would have none of it. Someone had to show them what hard work was, and if they weren't going to have the self-discipline to care, he was going to make them care. He was thinking this over when he pushed the door to the bar open and stepped into the smoky room. 

The bar was always crowded, especially on school trip days, so today was no exception. People gathered around tables closely, talking and laughing over their drinks. The room was noisy and filled with pipe smoke, but no one seemed to notice. Looking around, he found a table out of the way of everyone and slightly hidden, so he took it, sitting down pensively and looking around.

His eyes fell on two people in cloaks sitting on the opposite side of the room, and he silently grumbled as he knew who it was immediately. Cassi looked up at the same moment as him and their eyes met, staring at the other. After a moment, both remembered themselves and tore their eyes away, and Severus knew both Cassi and the man she sat with were studying him. This is just how his luck went; the moment he wanted to forget, he was reminded. The man was now talking animatedly with her, and Cassi simply shook her head, and then the man put his arm around her shoulders and hugged her.

Severus rolled his eyes and turned his face away, looking out a window glumly at the people on the street milling about.

"Professor Severus Snape, it's been awhile since I've seen _you_ here," came a sweet sounding voice, and he turned his head and saw Madame Rosmerta standing next to him in colorful turquoise robes with her hand on her hip. "I get all sorts every day, but you're the rarest of them all!"

"Rosmerta, it certainly has been awhile," he replied in his formal, stiff manner. 

"As proper as usual, some things don't change. Mind if I sit down? I've been on my feet all day," she asked, and he gestured to the seat across from him.

"So Madame, what awful rumors have you been hearing of me now?" he asked her as sat down, and she laughed. Every once in awhile Severus would come in, usually during break, and was updated with some of the rumors about himself and the Ministry, as Fudge was becoming a frequent visitor. Through the years, they had struck up a correspondence when important information was needed and something resembling a friendship, even though they rarely spoke.

"Oh, you've been the talk of the town this year," she conveyed smilingly. "Students came in here last winter talking about you and the Defense teacher acting like lovebirds in the hallway!" Severus looked horrified at being associated with such a word, but this only served to her amusement. "I told them 'Surely not Professor Snape' but they insisted. So, I take it that might not be true?"

Severus shrugged slightly. "Maybe more 'outdated' than 'true', Rosmerta."

She looked at him with sympathy. "What happened?"

"Honestly, I've no idea," he answered, clasping his hands over the table.

"Oh, you probably wouldn't tell me if you did know, as secretive as you are," she said, still smiling. "Some things just aren't meant to be, I guess. Some things change, others stay rock solid. Don't worry yourself about it, there'll be someone."

"Barmaid talk," he mumbled, and she laughed again.

"Ah well, other than that, it's the same old thing around; how horrible you are in class, and unfair, and mean! I hear it all in here. The students will appreciate you when they're out on their own, that's for sure," she sat back in her chair. "I'd tell you to remember what it was like when you were a kid, but you were a teenager going on fifty all through school. So serious."

"I suppose," he replied. Rosmerta leaned back further and studied him hard, pausing for a moment.

"That woman had you going for loops, didn't she?"

"Pardon?"

"You really liked her, didn't you?" she said gently. Severus glanced out of the window again. "Aw honey, don't try to avoid me, I know that means 'yes'. If the woman in the cloak over there is her (the only Russian woman I've had in here lately), she's only looked over here about seven times since I sat down. Now, being a woman, I know that's interest, jealousy, or a little bit of both. Think about it." Madame Rosmerta stood up and put her hands on her hips. "Need something to drink?"

"No, I better not. I think it's time I went back to the castle to look over the exams," he said, now rising.

"Heard about your exams, they're killers."

"I only wish."

Madame Rosmerta laughed and patted his shoulder. "Give 'em hell Severus, and I'll see you around."

"Goodbye," he replied, and headed out through the door and onto the street. He tried to forget that a barmaid had given him romantic advice as he edged around people on the street, finally reaching a place where there were no students, the path back to the castle.

__

Today wasn't entirely fruitless, he thought to himself as he walked. _No, I finally saw the other man. It's still hard to believe. Maybe I just want to believe it's someone else… _Too tired to think about it anymore, he pushed the subject out of his mind. He'd go back to his nice, safe dungeon where he belonged, and go back to work. It was for the best really.

He was repeating this to himself over and over as he walked up to the castle and into the Entrance Hall. Starting for his dungeons, he heard a voice call out to him.

"Severus," said Professor Dumbledore. "So nice to see you out and around."

"I was just heading back to my dungeons," answered Severus firmly.

"I should have known," replied Dumbledore. "Did you enjoy being outside all the same?"

"Not in the least," said Severus, now folding his arms and looking longingly down the hall where his dungeon was waiting.

Dumbledore gave a small chuckle. "Don't let the sunshine depress you, Severus. It's not as bad as it seems. Good morning." Dumbledore continued on his way to the Great Hall, and Severus took off for the dungeons, his silent sanctuary.

He spent the rest of the day looking over the tests for any errors, and enchanting them so they could not be cheated from. This task took until late that night, and Severus collapsed into bed when he was done without giving a thought to what he had seen that day. Severus' best defense from himself was repression.

~

The week following the Hogsmeade trip was exhausting and nerve-wracking for Harry Potter. He had a few tests every day, but he was cramming like a madman at night to scrape together a decent grade. Today was the last day of testing, but it was his hardest; he had Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions back to back. On the first day he had had Transfigurations (in which he had to change a common fish into a toy train, but the trick was keeping the fish alive enough to do it) and Divinations (He read his partner's palm, but really just made up many things having to do with that person's doom, destruction, and heartbreak). The second day, he had Charms (The class had to teach random objects to react to touch) and Care of Magical Creatures (the substitute made their class list magical properties of a dragon and how professionals handle them). The third day, Wednesday, was a thankful break for him, and he studied for his last four tests, Herbology, Astronomy, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Potions. Herbology had gone fine (he simply cared for a short-lived plant for the entire class and was graded on the amount of fruit it produced), and Astronomy that night went well enough (He remembered most of the stars and constellations). It was the next day that would be a challenge.

At breakfast on Friday morning, Hermione, Ron, and Harry all ate quietly, mentally preparing themselves for their tasks ahead. Hermione was especially nervous, because they had already done the parchment test portion of their final exam for Defense, but now came the actual hands on part. For Snape's test, they had brewed a potion last week that would count for fifty percent of their grade, and the other fifty percent came from a written portion today. The trio had seen other students who came from that class; all had that pale, haunted look as they worried about repeating the course.

People began to get up and move around, and Hermione looked near-panicked. "What? Surely it's not time to go. We just sat down. Wait. We can't go yet!"

"Hermione, what are you fussing for? You'll do fine," Harry commented.

"You'll jinx me, don't say that!" she shrieked. Ron and Harry exchanged their familiar 'she's having a weird moment' look from behind her, and then took her arms and stood her up. 

"Come on," Ron said, and a rueful Hermione picked up her bags and began walking with them out of the Great Hall. She muttered to herself all the way down the hall, going over spells and deflection charms, until even Harry was rolling his eyes.

Pushing her the last part of the way, the three finally reached their classroom door, and entered in, looking around for some sign of what they would be doing that day. Seeing nothing out of the ordinary, they became puzzled, but took their seats all the same. Cassi was at work at her desk, very diligently grading something, and did not look up until the bell rang. Silently, she took the roll, then stood up with her grade book and fetched her stool.

She gestured to the door. "Follow me." The class of sixth year Gryffindors stood, and followed her as she stepped through the doorway, walking calmly down the hall and up the stairs, arriving at the dusty third-floor corridor with comprehension on the students' faces. A few pedestals lit at the appearance of the group, and once everyone was inside the corridor, she started.

"Well, I think most of you understand what's happening here. I told you that you would be able to have another go at the corridor challenge, and here it is. It is the same as before; you'll start on this side, and end up on that side, making a horseshoe-shaped path. There are a few new tricks to the hallway, but I believe everyone here can master it. The difference this time is that I won't be following you; I've set up a system of mirrors which I can follow your movements with from this." She pulled a hand mirror out of her pocket. "Don't worry though, I control everything in that hall, so nothing will get out of hand. Neville, please sit down for now, you're looking pale. Alright, when done with the course, you will stay on that side of the hallway so as not to give pointers to your classmates, and when everyone is done, we'll go back downstairs. Any volunteers for first?" She looked around, and at first everyone seemed as frightened as Neville (who was breathing into a paper bag while sitting on the floor), but Hermione finally raised her hand. Cassi nodded knowingly at her, and walked off to the opposite side of the hall, setting down her stool. After getting out her grade book and quill, she shot off a few green sparks with her wand, and Hermione started down the hall, wand at the ready.

The sounds that reached the group further proved to terrify the students. Creaky metal echoed around the hall, along with loud thuds, sharp bangs, and drawn out wails of creatures unknown. However, Hermione emerged at the other end of the hallway at last, looking pleased with herself as Cassi said something to her in a low voice. The class clapped.

"Lavender Brown!" Cassi called out, and the little girl squeaked.

"Yes, alphabetical order!" said Ron enthusiastically, proud he was a Weasley. 

Ron was correct. Cassi went alphabetically down her list, and Harry grew increasingly nervous as the letters came closer and closer to P. Inevitably, she called out his name, and he walked over to the hall and waited for the sparks. Three green sparks were visible very suddenly, and Harry pulled out his wand and started down the hallway, looking around himself sharply. 

He kept in the middle of the hall to avoid the things on the side, but passed a suit of armor without incident. However, a few steps past it, and when Harry was looking at a rather odd portrait near the turn, he heard clunking footsteps behind him. Quickly, he whirled around and shot a blue stream of light at the suit of armor with its cold metal hands scarcely half a meter away from his neck. The suit clattered to the floor, now not a threat as it lay in shining pieces. A second after this victory, Harry felt a hot sort of steam at his shoulder, and realized that two pinpoints were burning into his clothes, the pinpoints lining up with the eyes of the portrait of an elderly Medieval man. Harry cast a spell around himself to protect from the burning eyes, and hurried on, turning the first corner.

The next part of the corridor seemed blank except for a trunk. Harry continued to walk down the corridor, wary of anything that could jump out. However, when he came to the chest, he heard his teacher's voice echo from all around.

"Hex it," she ordered. Harry was confused for a moment as to whether he should hex the box or open it, but his question was answered as the lid to the trunk burst open and a strange ghoul stood from the box, tall and formidable. His eyes were sunken and his face was human-like, but he had a mouth that would scare even the bravest of men. His jaws were powerful and muscular, and projected slightly like a dog's. Lips stretched over pointed, thin teeth, and Harry could see the blood thirst in its rubbery face. 

"Uhh," he said, backing up. Ghouls didn't respond to much damage of their nervous system or organs, so he'd have to do something random and lock it back in the box. Harry tried to remember, and raised his wand in front of him, for if the thing lunged, he might try stabbing it with his wand. Quickly though, a thought surfaced in his mind. _Hex it to _put_ it into the box_. "Ohh, ok… uuh… _Complicare_!"

The ghoul stopped in the middle of stepping out of the trunk and stared. Soon, he bent over like a giant hand had folded him in two, arms reaching to the ground, then his arms tucked in, and then his legs, until he had been folded into a little ghoulish mass, sitting at the bottom of the trunk. Harry grinned and slammed the lid of the trunk shut, and then hurried through the corridor, turning every now and then to make sure he wasn't being followed. In the corner at the end of the hallway stood a human-sized dummy, staring off into space. Harry approached it.

"You've two minutes, battle me," commanded the doll, and it raised a hand and shot a spell at Harry, which was deflected off his shield. Harry returned the spell, combating him back and forth easily. Person to person combat was nothing to him anymore, but it was these random unnerving objects that got him. Eventually, the dummy began to ease down, and then returned to its corner, defeated.

Taking the left, Harry looked down to see the last bit of hallway and his teacher sitting on her stool with her grade book and mirror. Indeed, Harry remembered that there was a mirror every few steps of the way, and was comforted somewhat by this thought. However, as he walked the last stretch of hallway, a funny sound followed him, like that of a flickering flame. Alarmed, he turned quickly and jumped out of the way of a floating candelabra. It was a floor stand one, and nearly taller than himself, he figured as it whooshed over his head. Thinking fast, Harry yelled "_Finite Incantato_!" and the wrought-iron candle stand stopped, hitting the ground after falling from its levitating height. He shook his head and quickly walked out of the hall, greeted with a smattering of applause from his peers.

"Good job Harry, I liked the way you handled the ghoul!" Professor Talin commented. "Full marks." He breathed in relief and went to find Hermione in a small group of who had finished. 

They chatted until Ron was done (he had a bit of a problem with the portrait), and waited for Neville, who was the last person. Cassi had saved him for last, wanting him to be heartened by the others' success. He did well, too, except for a bit of panic with the ghoul and some problems with the dummy. However, when he stumbled from the hall, she patted his shoulder and told him he had passed well, and he broke into a grin. Everyone then stood and followed their teacher out of the third floor and down to her classroom, where they had a few minutes to spare, and spent them quizzing each other for Potions.

When the bell did in fact ring, everyone turned pale. From her desk, Cassi said, "Goodbye, my class. It was a privilege to teach you. Now run off and do well on your Potions final!" They stood, looking around, then shuffled out of the classroom and into the throngs of people in the hall. 

"I don't think she's coming back next year," Hermione stated matter-of-factly as they pushed down the hall. Harry looked at her hard.

"I dunno, why wouldn't she?" he said.

"Snape," she replied. "That and she looks ill, maybe we were too overtaxing on her health."

Ron shrugged. "I sorta liked her, I mean, she wasn't like Lupin or anything, but she wasn't worse than him either… kinda strict, but encouraging."

"Ron, you liked her from the very beginning," Hermione pointed out flatly. "You thought she was pretty."

"Well, she is. Hey, I'm saying it like it's a fact. She's pretty. There. That's all I'm saying. That and she should have never ended up with a git like Snape, and I don't blame her if she leaves because of him," Ron said, ending growlishly. 

"You should have seem them when we were kidnapped, though. It's different than how they treat each other in the halls, it's like they belong together," Harry reasoned. Ron looked thoughtful, and Hermione nodded.

"_I_ think they're cute," Hermione said in a firm voice. "Or were, at any rate."

"Cute is not a word I would use in reference to Snape," Ron said, looking ill.

Hermione shook her head as they descended the dungeon stairs. Immediately, the chilled air reminded them they had one more test to take before they were free for a week before the end of the year ceremony. They walked down the hall and into his classroom. A few other students were already there, and more were coming. The trio took their seats in the back, and waited for class to start. Their professor was standing formidably in the corner of the classroom, a stack of papers in his hand and a thin smile of malice on his lips. When the bell rang, he wordlessly passed out thick packets of loose-leaf parchment to everyone, and their eyes widened. 

"Begin, and know that these tests have been charmed so you cannot cheat," was all their teacher said while he enjoyed the look of their paling faces before he took a seat at this desk. Harry dropped his eyes to his test, and read the first five questions to himself, horrified. Hoping against hope that this was his lucky day, he began marking answers. For the next two hours, he scrambled his mind trying to remember some of the most obscure things he had written down in this class, and most of the questions were tricky anyway. However, at the end of the hour, he turned in his test with the rest of his classmates, and practically ran out of class when the final bell rang. He was, however, hindered by a slow-moving Hermione, who was still pondering over some of the questions after taking the test. Eventually though, he and Ron talked her into a game of chess in the Common room, and the trio commenced their week-long break on the grounds of Hogwarts.

The teachers, however, spent this week grading their tests. All were preoccupied with finishing before the end of the week so exam results could be given out, so the staff was keeping to themselves and working as quickly as possible. 

It was nice for Severus to find himself up to his collar in work, because it meant that he actually had something to do, not work he had created for himself. He spent the hard week alone, keeping to himself and not joining into the usual staff room conversations after dinner. Most years, he would go to listen and sometimes throw in a bitter comment or two, but this year… it was different. He had lost any inkling he ever had to be a part of the social ring of teachers, and valued his time alone. Being alone meant no one changed your situation for better or for worse.

It was in this lonely solitude that Severus spent his grading week, except when he came out to eat and scold a few wild students in the hallway. The end of the year ceremony came and passed without incident; once again, Gryffindor won the House Cup, and everyone was joyous and happy. The nicest thing Severus managed was a scowl, but he was most grateful when the students got on their carriages and left the grounds to the train station. Then, and only then, he was free to come out at random times and step outside for a walk alone, usually when it was cloudy. It helped him think.

On one such day, he took a walk to help clear his mind. It was cloudy and windy, but Severus didn't notice until his robes began making it difficult to walk, as there was something of a sail effect in his billowing robes. After the wind picked up even more and it became a bothersome task to walk, he turned to go inside, and therefore found his way to the front path. When he reached the gravel way, he saw another figure in bright blue waiting on the path, and promptly recognized it as the Headmaster, for he was smoothing his beard to keep the wind from whipping it around. Severus continued up the walk as Dumbledore waited for him.

"Headmaster," Severus said in greeting. 

"Severus, you've come out of the dungeon again, wonderful! It's rather breezy today," Dumbledore said cordially.

"Yes, quite a deal windy," replied Severus. "I believe though that you did not come out here to discuss the weather."

Dumbledore shook his head. "You are correct, I actually had the intention of talking to you about Ms. Talin."

"Oh really?" replied Severus, sounding mildly curious.

"Indeed. I think you should go see the professor right away."

"I don't see a reason for that, she's doing perfectly fine on her own," Severus said somewhat coldly.

Dumbledore looked around him, and then gripped Severus' arm sympathetically. "Not as well as you would think. She's moving out, Severus." Severus looked at him hard.

"Why would she do that?" he asked, astounded.

"She would be the one to tell you that. I would suggest asking her. Go on," he said, and gestured to the doors. Severus nodded, then set off with his long strides to her room.

By the time he had reached her rooms, he was honestly considering just letting her alone and going back to his rooms, but something inside his mind woke up and demanded to settle this problem once and for all. Therefore, without knocking, he put his hand on the doorknob and pushed the door open.

The scene before him was strange to his eyes. Books floated about the room and into certain piles, the desks were scrubbed and pushed against the wall, and the floor was swept. Cassi stood behind a barren desk, putting things into a box. She looked up at him in surprise, eyes shining out from dark sockets. Her robes hung on her figure for she had lost weight in her habit of skipping meals, but what Severus noticed most was that she had a very calm expression, marked by a look of indifference in her eyes.

"Severus, I figured you would be coming by sometime," she said in a formal tone.

"Dumbledore said you were moving out. You weren't fired, were you?" he asked, stepping through the floating mass of books by pushing through them with open palms and approaching the front of her desk.

"No no," she said, not looking at him as she continued her work. "No, I quit. I'm moving back to Moscow."

"When?" he asked.

"The day after tomorrow, if I remember my dates correctly." She brushed a piece of hair out of her face and continued to work.

"So you're just picking up and leaving, then?"

"Well, yes. I've got a place to stay there, and a job opportunity at a Muggle shop. I might come back for the August defense meeting."

"Why did you quit?" he asked firmly.

"Many reasons. Partially because I'm not physically up to the job, but mostly because I'm trying to save face for you." She continued packing, but he stopped her by taking the books out of her hands, and setting them down on her desk.

"Why would I need my reputation saved?" he asked warily. She bit her lip and left to go into her office, but faster than she had seen him move in a long time, he bolted around her desk and blocked her way. "Why would I need my reputation saved, Cassi?" he asked again, more firmly.

"Sit down, I'll tell you when I put something up," she responded, looking over his shoulder to her office.

"I'd prefer to stand. Continue," he said harshly. She picked a book up off the desk slowly and gripped it tightly.

She shook her head, then smiled sadly. "Because, Severus… rumors fly quickly at this school, and what would they say when they saw I was pregnant?"

The silence in the room was deafening. Severus stared openly at her, his whole face showing disbelief; his large black eyes were opened wide, his mouth hung open slightly, and he had become strangely pale as a rush of color left his face. She pushed past him and put the book away in her office, not really wanting to look at him in the other room. For the past few weeks, she had been taking a Calming Concoction so she could handle herself normally, but she had neglected it this afternoon, and she could feel the effects wearing off. 

There was a creak and the rustling of fabric as she heard Severus sit down in her chair. Sadly, she walked back to the classroom, and saw him, his elbows resting on his knees and his face in his hands. Ebony hair cascaded over his hands and cheeks, and she felt sorry for him, truly, but exceedingly nervous about what he would say. The silence continued, and Cassi leaned against the wall, waiting for him to talk.

"It can't be… _my_ child," he said finally, in a rather firm voice.

Cassi clenched her fists. "No, it's Flitwick's, you're absolutely right, because it has to be one of those electric affairs I'm having," she said savagely. Ever since he had made his comments about her cheating on him, she had been quite hurt and embittered by it. "Severus, whose do you _think_ it is?"

He looked up at her strangely, and spoke to her as if giving directions to a small child. "What I'm trying to say is that it is not _physically_ possible for it to be mine. The prolonged use of the Anxiety Potion makes it impossible for males to have children."

"Not so impossible. You see, I knew that, we've both talked about it. I researched in the library when Madame Pomfrey informed me of my condition, and went back to her to ask what they treated you with after the kidnapping. She replied that bezoars, phoenix tears, and a few other irrelevant plants were used," she explained.

He nodded slowly. "Yes, that would reverse everything…"

Cassi folded her arms. "You still don't sound convinced. _Why?_ Why am I such an _infidel_ to you?"

"The man at Hogsmeade?"

"Who, Sasha? My brother? Ha! I've been writing to him ever since the break we had, and he's been talking to my parents and explaining things. He found out about magic soon after I left, and things have been easier for him. I didn't tell you because I scarcely had time to, and then it didn't matter anymore after we started fighting." Cassi sat at the edge of her desk now, looking down at him as he rest his jaw on his fist, his eyes looking to the floor in realization and incredulity. "Anyone else I've been sleeping with in your mind?"

Severus looked up at her hard. "Cassi, I never thought you were with someone else because you were flighty, I thought you were with someone else because I wasn't good enough. I've yet to have a grasping as to why you would stay with someone like me."

She knelt down now to be eye level with him, searching his eyes. "And yet I tell you all the time that I love you, which has never been easy for me, and it doesn't penetrate that wall of low self-confidence you've built around yourself. It seems like I've always loved you though, and I always will. I can say it a thousand times for you but it doesn't matter." There was a silence.

His face grew stormy. "But you didn't have enough confidence in me to tell me that I'm the father of our child?"

She stood as she sensed him closing off to her. "That's different."

"How, exactly, is it different?"

She was touching the desk again, looking at the grain of the wood and tracing it with her fingers. "It's different because I've not been right in the mind. I didn't know for about two weeks, I just felt ill off and on. I was also so snappish. So, you forced me to go to the nurse, who gave me some pills to right me, which worked alright. She said she wanted to do a test out of curiosity, so I agreed and went back to her three days later. Obviously, that's when she told me I was pregnant, and I told her she was mistaken. I went to the library during break and looked it up, not finding much until I began to wonder if you had been given phoenix tears. I went back and asked her, and she confirmed my suspicions. I _begged_ her not to tell you because I didn't know how you'd react. I also took myself off the pills because they weren't safe for me. I held myself together until that evening, when I came back to the room in tears, and you burst in a short while later and demanded to know why I was crying. 

I felt terrible the entire time, I wanted to tell you everything but I was too afraid. In my mind, scenes kept replaying themselves. Times when you'd come back and fall on the bed, declaring that you hated the children because they were incompetent came to mind. And… and there were things Voldemort had said…'_ Do you honestly think Severus is going to be there for you for everything? Support you in all your dreams? Think again child, think again-_'"

"So you agreed with his words?" Severus interjected loudly.

"No, you're not listening to me! I'm trying to tell you that there were a thousand things holding me back because I was emotionally unstable! Half the time I thought you had known all along and were tormenting me by pretending to be unknowing, and the other half I was sure that you didn't know, but you'd make me give it up if you did! I wanted this child, I wanted to keep it, and both prospects seemed frightening. I hated you for not knowing and not forcing me to tell you, and I hated myself for doing this to you. I wasn't emotionally balanced, and I'm still not. I've been taking Calming Concoctions for a few weeks now to teach and hold myself together." 

"So you decided to quit and move out."

"I have to. The kids are too curious, and it will be rather obvious very quickly that I'm pregnant. The school board would have kicked me off anyway, especially if they get interested and try to do a background check on me; it would make them curious. I wouldn't be able to stand it here anyway, seeing you everyday and knowing how I've treated you," she said quietly as his presence grew louder.

"Yes, that's the obvious thing to do, leave me when I'm alone and desperate, yes," he said bitterly, glaring. "Do you know how many nights I've been kept up, wondering where I went wrong? Where I lost you? Who I'd lost you to?"

"I don't know, and I'm sorry, you have to believe that much," she said, still quiet.

"And now… now I've found out I've fathered a child! _Severus Snape_ has fathered a child! …How far are you?" His mocking voice held more bitterness than it did surprise.

She detected a dangerous note in his tone. "Almost two months," she replied meekly.

"And in those _two months_, you couldn't find the words to tell me. What did you think I was going to do, kill you?"

Cassi touched his arm with caution, but he brushed her away roughly. "I told you I didn't mean it, Severus!"

"Did it not _occur_ to you that I might _want_ to have a child? Is that so far beyond you? Why _wouldn't_ I want a child, am I so abnormal that the normal hopes and desires of a man are foreign to me?" he shouted, now standing up and towering over her and glaring with glittering black eyes. Silent tears were falling down her cheeks, and she couldn't respond for some time.

"And did it not occur to you that I've been too afraid to even hope it?" she managed to say.

"Of course that's _not _beyond me, I'm rather _used_ to it! I'm widely known as a fear-striking, cold-hearted monster, I don't know why you'd see me any differently!" he thundered.

"You know that's not true Severus!" she yelled back desperately. 

He turned away and stormed to the door. "It might as well be Snape to you, _Ms. Talin_," he said in a very cold voice. "I hope you find success in Russia, goodbye." And with that, he opened the door, stepped through it, and slammed it behind him.

Cassi fell down to the floor, pulling her knees up to her chest and sobbing hard, thinking over and over, "_You know that's not true, you know I love you!_"

~

Severus awoke with a groan, aching all over. What an awful dream he had had, something about Cassi being pregnant which caused him to fly into a rage… He remembered suddenly that it had not been a dream, but the events that had taken place two days before. Looking around his empty room, he collapsed back on his pillow. Getting up was pointless. He shook his head, trying to remember why this day seemed prominent though, and then realized that it was the day she said she was leaving. Moving a hand to his eyes, he felt something odd in his hand, and looked down at it. A black hair ribbon was tied loosely around his palm, holding a folded piece of parchment to it. Delicately, he removed the smooth ribbon, unfolded the parchment, and read it.

__

"I want to leave.

__

I don't think it would be acceptable to leave together in the middle of the meeting. Your boy toy would make the connection..."

It was in both her and his handwriting, and he remembered that it was the note they had written back and forth to each other on the night of the last defense meeting. Decidedly, he folded the paper back up, and still gripping the ribbon, went to get dressed in a rush.

***

Cassi looked to the Headmaster, whom she was shaking hands with just outside her carriage. "Thank you, Headmaster, for everything you've done this year."

Dumbledore smiled sadly at her. "I only wish you did not feel the need to leave. If you ever need anything, just send me an owl. Will you be coming to the meeting in August?"

"I'm afraid not, I believe I've done enough damage here," she said as she released his hand.

"He's still quite fond of you," Dumbledore said wisely. "He just has his ways."

"I fear I've undone his love for good now. Hopefully he'll move on," she said sadly. She had given up her calming potions now, for she was empty of emotion. A few days ago, this would have sent her into tears, but with no more tears to cry, she only stood now in the whipping wind as if chiseled from stone.

"Will _you_ move on?"

"I don't know, sir." She looked back at the castle. "I will miss him. I will miss the castle as well. Thank you again."

"It was a pleasure to have you on the staff," he replied, and patted her shoulder. "It looks like it might rain again, you should hurry." She nodded and stepped into the carriage, her small suitcase already in the carriage on the opposite seat. He shut the door to it, and she peered out the open window.

"Goodbye, Professor Dumbledore," she said quietly.

With a bow, he said. "Goodbye, I am sorry that the parting is not a happy one."

"What parting is?" she asked. "If I need you, I will owl you, and if you need me, here is my address." She handed him a slip of parchment with her address in both Cyrillic and English.

"Goodbye my dear," he said, tucking it into his pocket. The horseless carriage started off further down the path and out of the gate, soon to disappear with the curve in the road. Dumbledore stood for a moment more, then turned. As he was walking back to the castle from the midway point to the gate, he distinguished the familiar lanky figure of Severus Snape from the shadows of the doorway, only to watch him vanish inside when the sound of wooden wheels in dirt faded into nothingness.

~

Ooh, makes you feel all cold and curious inside, doesn't it? Want to know what happens? I'll tell you in the next chapter. Ha. That's what I love about writing, I can hold the "I know something you do not" card over your head aaaaallll day. *grin* This is the review part.


	12. Personal Poisons

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Author's Note: Ooook, so this chapter is a little late… I had it done on time though… I just had to go on vacation before I edited and posted. *nods* Yes indeed. I don't know when the last chapter (the next chapter) will be coming out. I want it to be just right, and that might take some time. Besides, these silly, short 31 paged chapters seem insufficient to me… I'm not sure how long the next one will be. I've finally got my idea for the epilogue though, so that's good… Anyway, what I'm trying to say in my roundabout manner is that I can't promise the next chapter will be out soon… maybe a month or so? However, I'll email you like always when I update. If you'd like to be emailed, put your address in your review, or leave a signed review.

Hm, this chapter really isn't too bad at all, no corruption this chapter. There is one Russian phrase in it, which means 'What are you busy doing?' If you get nothing else from this story, you will at least have a few good Russian phrases up your sleeve.

As always, I'm going to ask that you review because it really is an encouragement to keep going. I read every review I get, and I always appreciate them; they brighten my day immensely. I'd like to thank everyone who has already reviewed, it means quite a lot to me, and I'm grateful. I'd also like to give a shout out to a few people who have been reviewing for a very long time now like Frini, idrawwhales, padfootluva, and Pawzzz. You're all great, don't think your reviews go unnoticed! This chapter is dedicated to my readers, and especially the ones who have been reading for a long time now!

Oh, and for everyone concerned: This chapter and my entire story was pre-determined before Order of the Phoenix and contains very little to no spoilers for it. If you haven't read OotP, then I think you're quite safe with this story, and if you have… well, this was all conceived long before OotP hit the shelves, I hope you can enjoy it anyway. This is a 6th year fic, after all. Wow, that's a long author's note. Read, enjoy, and review!

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Chapter 12: Personal Poisons

Amber, he decided. Amber and half-empty. Though if he turned his head towards the light, it was more yellow, and if he turned his head away, it was red-brown. No, amber and half-empty best described the small glass of scotch that sat on Severus Snape's desk that night.

He couldn't change the color, but he certainly could fix the amount of scotch in his glass, so he lifted the heavy container and poured a bit into his cup, then corked it and set it down. There. Now it was full. He took the glass up and sipped it, leaning back in his office chair and looking around his room. It was quite an interesting effect to see all the colors of the potion bottles blur together in a drunken stupor. What amused him even more was that the infernal clock had stopped ticking, or at least he couldn't hear it anymore. Damn that clock. 

Severus had taken to drink at the beginning of July, and was continuing his nightly habit into the warm evenings of August. Having no desire to take a Sleeping Potion every night, he found scotch to be a better substitute and therefore indulged in it on the harder nights of sleep. Tonight, for some reason, was one of the hardest he had yet to endure, though he reasoned to himself that it was because a new school year was approaching… a school year with a new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. The new teacher was some hotshot young man with too many opinions and too little tact not to voice them. Already Severus despised him, but it could have been anyone and he would have hated them too. He hated most everyone.

Upon pondering his hatred of humans, he took another drink from his glass then set it down, quickly sidetracked by the color of the drink. It looked yellow again, though when moved into a shadow, it looked much darker. So which was it?

Severus finished off the rest of the glass, and was on the verge of pouring himself another when he heard the door open and shut to his classroom. Therefore, Severus waited for the person to present himself at his office door.

"Severus?" called the familiar voice of Albus Dumbledore through his door.

"Come in, Headmaster," he called clearly. Dumbledore opened the door with caution, and surveyed the scene.

"Scotch, is it? Hmm," Dumbledore said, sitting in a chair across from Severus' desk.

"Indeed," replied Snape.

"And that look in your eyes tells me you've been doing more than examining the chemical properties."

"I've examined three glasses thus far. I might need a fourth to verify my findings," Severus said. He wasn't the type to act stupid when drunk, but he became quite a deal easier to talk to after a few glasses. 

"I assume you won't be continuing this habit come the new school year."

"Of course not, I'll have far too much to do, and there are students meandering around at all hours of the night which I intend to interrogate."

Dumbledore chuckled. "I don't doubt you will. Oh, which reminds me, you are still up to a mission just before school starts, aren't you? I've got something that needs attending to in Germany which you might like."

"I'm very much still interested in a mission. What are we looking at, spying, investigating, meeting with someone…? Something tells me that it could be hazardous." Severus smiled faintly with the thought. He felt useful when he worked for Dumbledore, as if paying his debts for his darker past.

"It's a possibility. Spying, I suppose I would label it spying. A suspected Death Eater actually… if he is a Death Eater and proof is provided, we might be able to at least get him off the school board," Dumbledore said in a serious tone, and Severus took a sip from his glass and shook his head.

"School board? There's one more official who got past personality checks," he said tartly. "Let me guess his type; he's of old wizarding blood, his father was maybe a prominent figure of society, calling his honor into question would be an insult to the family name, etceteras."

"Why didn't you like Divinations again, Severus my boy?" asked Dumbledore with a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh it's all the same story, simple deductions. Look at my own situation. Now don't be noble and say that I turned out for the good, I've heard that rubbish before. Who exactly will I be spying on?" said Severus, tapping his long fingers on the desk in thought, forgetting his problems in the moment.

"Antonio Cragburn."

"Really? Now that actually surprised me, although now that I think about it…. Hm yes…" There was a silence as both fell into deep thought. As Severus looked down at the half-empty glass he had in his hand, he realized Dumbledore was looking at him as if thinking about something. "I'm going to assume that you did not come here to discuss my drinking or the mission though," he stated factually, and waited for the reply.

"In a way, I did," said Dumbledore casually. "The _reason_ for your drinking, at any rate."

"It's really not necessary," he said, his volume dropping considerably.

"There seems to be a few indications to me that it needs to be brought up." Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, his arms folded across his chest. "You're holding one of them."

Severus set his glass down quickly. "It's of no matter now," he answered indifferently.

"For something that has ceased to matter, it does keep resurfacing in your mind, doesn't it?"

"No," he lied stiffly. "What has happened between Ms. Talin and myself is over, and there is no need to discuss it."

Dumbledore gave him a stern quizzical look over his half-moon spectacles.

Severus broke eye contact. "When a new situation presents itself, I'll deal with it accordingly… but until that time…"

"…you will continue living half a life?" Dumbledore filled in for him. "That's what you're doing, living half a life hiding out in these dungeons, locking yourself in every night. The other half of you is in Moscow, living half a life as well."

Severus laughed an unhappy laugh. "My gloomy presence is not missed around the castle, Dumbledore. And I doubt she's living half a life, she's free from my tyranny and bitterness." He took a drink from his glass. 

Dumbledore gave him a hard look. "I do not believe she views it quite like that. She was rather somber when she wrote to me last, a month or so ago to tell me she wasn't coming to the meeting. I don't think she's as happy as you envision."

"She will be, in time." He stared absently at his cup. "Even though our parting was not, erm, _pleasant_, she will move on eventually…"

"You know, it was quite natural of you to feel as afraid as you were," Dumbledore said quite plainly. Severus looked up at him sharply, then looked away, and began rolling the glass between his palms. "You needn't be so ashamed of it, it's just how one reacts to it that defines the fear. You still have the chance to act."

"No, it's highly unlikely that I do," Severus replied. "You don't know what was said-"

"And what you could still say _is_ important. You have a choice that has to be made in the next few days, before school starts and before this mission, as to whether you let her go and continue on without her, or you whether you go back and fix what is broken."

Severus shook his head, still looking quite stiff and uncomfortable. "If it were that easy… but it's probably for the better, for her, if we just…stopped, I suppose."

"You're too hard on yourself!" Dumbledore said, and Severus was surprised to hear him laugh. "Don't let the sunshine depress you, let yourself enjoy it."

__

Of course he has to sound wise with his cryptic sunshine analogies, thought Severus moodily to himself. _I do wonder if he'd be making the same analogy if I weren't so pale. Everyone thinks Dumbledore to be so kindly, but there are times when I swear he is mocking me._ Severus simply nodded and fiddled with a quill on his desk now.

"Come now, Severus, you'd best get to bed. It's near one o'clock as it is!" said Dumbledore as he offered him a hand to help him stand. Severus took it with difficulty (having perhaps a glass or two more than he should have), and stood. He felt a phial being pressed into his hand, and Severus held it up to the light and looked at it.

"Hmm, Hangover Concoction," Severus said flatly.

"I believe you have a visitor tomorrow, who sends news you might want to concentrate on. Perhaps this will help," he answered, and though Severus wanted to ask who it was, he let the topic alone and said his goodbyes respectfully. He then took to his rooms and collapsed into bed with little energy to do anything else.

~

__

It was uncomfortably cold as snow poured down around Severus, who clutched his cloak tighter to him to stop it from flapping in the darkness. He had been wandering for several days, and felt the tired and hungry pangs of travel weigh him down. Through the bitter wind and thick snow he trudged on, until he finally fell to his knees with no strength to carry on. Suddenly, a light flooded into his vision, and he winced as its powerful beams washed over his unready eyes.

Somewhat blindly, he stood and stumbled forward towards the light, hoping to find someone who could at least point him to the nearest town and maybe put a roof over his head for the night. Instead, he found a window in a small, rundown house that someone had lit a lamp in, which illuminated the room and a scene before his eyes.

It was Cassi in that barren, broken down room, sitting on the floor and quite round with child. Severus put his hand to the window absently as if to pet her, for she looked in desperate need of comfort. Indeed, she was rocking back and forth without thought, staring at the floor in a dreamy sort of way. As Severus came to his senses and nearly tapped the glass, another figure entered the room. He was a tall, muscular man with an angry gait and an irate face. Once in the room, he spied Cassi and pulled her off the floor and to her feet by jerking her arm up. Through the window, he heard the man screaming at her, over and over insulting her until she had been reduced to tears and he, now satisfied, stomped out of a door that led to the outside. She sunk to the floor again, shaking and crying, and still rocking back and forth. Having seen quite enough, Severus pulled away from the window and started around the house to find the door the man had exited. At the front of the small shack was the peeling door, with no sign of the man now. Boldly, Severus opened the door and walked inside, cold, frozen, and wet from the snow.

"Cassi," he said softly, and her crying stopped in a gasp as she looked up at him in amazement. He walked to her and knelt beside her, his hands running through her hair and over her cheeks lovingly, tracing bruises with a sharp pain to his heart. "Who is he?"

"A Death Eater," she choked in a raspy voice, one that has been strained with repeated crying. "Don't let him catch you here."

He took her hand gently in his own. "Let's leave," he said quietly, and she nodded and let him help her stand. Her arms were around him in a second, and he gripped her tightly as her face buried in his neck, tears soaking into his torn collar. "Don't cry, it's alright now." 

It was about this time that he became acutely aware that something was pressing into his shoulder, something sturdy that was poking against his bones. He drew back from her to find a dagger shoved through her shoulder, and her eyes lifted from the floor to his before she fell against him, paling almost instantly. He caught her and knelt, looking at the dagger and the wound as blood blossomed onto her robes and split onto his hand.

"I wish I hadn't left," she said in a small, choked voice.

"Don't think about that, you'll be fine," he managed, though he made no move to help her, for no move was to be made. He stroked her hair and pulled her closer, stunned and confused while saddened nonetheless. There was nothing to do but watch her suffer as he hopelessly comforted her with soft words. Finally she smiled bravely at him and led his hand to pat his unborn child, then flashed her smile again, going limp. He laid her on the ground, horrified and broken far more than she.

He was then transported, it seems, to a place of total darkness, except for one thing that glowed brightly: a small child. He approached a small girl, with raven hair and swirling eyes, the perfect image of her mother.

"My mother died," she said quietly, in a sad, melodic voice. She bordered on panic as she fidgeted and wrung her hands.

"I know," he replied with difficulty. 

"Did you? How would you know?" she inquired with curiosity.

"I… was there."

"Oh," she sniffled. " W-what's your name?"

Unable to tear his eyes off this small child, he replied, "Severus Snape."

"I don't know you, who are you?" she child cried out into the echoing darkness with distress. The words bounced around the room, striking him harshly.

"I believe… I believe I'm your father," he murmured with amazement. It had to have been the strangest thing that had passed his lips in the history of his life.

"No you're not! I don't have a father! My father left! He wouldn't have let mother die!" she screamed, covering her ears with her hands. Severus stood, rooted to the spot in shock.

Severus awoke from this nightmare in a cold sweat, shaking slightly. When he came to his senses and realized nothing from it was real, and it had all been a bad dream as a byproduct of his conversation with Dumbledore mingled with the effects of the alcohol, he relaxed slightly and shook his head. He had had worse nightmares, but he was having problems shaking the image of that small child.

Unnerved, he stood to wash his face in the bathroom. He really must stop taking these dreams so seriously, they were just pictures his mind put together at random. And yet, each was his worst fears relived again and again. Sometimes the nights were as hard as the days, and he thought this to himself wistfully as he splashed cold water onto his face in the sink.

In the morning, he reawakened with a pounding headache and a general feeling of illness. Groggily, he threw the twisted covers back and withdrew from bed at a slow pace to the bathroom, where he immediately downed the phial Dumbledore had given him the night before. Very quickly, his headache lessened and he began to feel normal again, so he got dressed for the day, wearing his frock-coat and pants to look slightly more formal than his casual robes for this mystery person that he was to meet today. 

He grumbled all the way to breakfast, hoping that this person was worth the effort of breaking out of his miserable reverie to converse with another human. He was certain that reading out of his stack of books in his room was far more productive than what anyone had to say to him, but if it was for Dumbledore, then of course he would do it. 

Barely touching his toast or eggs, Severus picked his way through the meal, not really as hungry as he was thirsty. He drank his goblet of water (his preference in the mornings now) with respectful silence, and listened to the other teachers talk. McGonagall was discussing the mailing list with Dumbledore, Flitwick was squeakily listening to Trelawny and Vector have it out about a 'prediction' of hers, and Madame Hooch was trying to convince Madame Pomfrey that Quidditch wasn't really as dangerous as it seems, at the school anyway. Everyone acted as they usually did, and he was grateful they did not bother him, especially when he put up his normal aloof façade that they all knew him by. He wasn't fooling himself though, his reflection showed this more with each passing week.

His black eyes had lost their spark and had become fathomless dark tunnels that led to nowhere visible. Underneath his eyes, dark shadows made his late nights obvious to everyone, and his cheeks were sunken into his bones, making his already thin face look gaunt. He made no effort with his hair or shaving, and therefore took on the look of a man with much distress, but nothing to do about it. At this point, Severus did not care about his appearance; it was the least of his worries.

He was sitting back in his chair, pondering this, when Dumbledore stood and left the table, walking in his steady manner towards the doors. Severus shook his head and stood quickly, catching up to the Headmaster with ease and walking with him out of the room and out of earshot.

"Good morning, Severus. I trust you feel better?" asked Dumbledore in a friendly way.

"I do, thank you," he mumbled, not liking to talk about his nightly habits. "Erm Dumbledore, about this person coming to see me…"

"Oh yes indeed! He should be here around lunchtime. I told him you would be in your dungeon more than likely, and he would be able to find you there," Dumbledore said calmly.

"Yes, I suppose that will be correct. I don't expect you could bring any clarity to the subject we're to discuss? Or whom I will be discussing it with?"

Dumbledore smiled and put a hand on Snape's shoulder. "Sometimes good things happen in strange manners."

"And something tells me you're being meddlesome again," Severus remarked dryly, and Dumbledore laughed.

"Too right, my boy! Too right! You'll find it all out soon enough. In the meantime, you can look over the details of your trip. There's a packet on your desk outlining a few things and some background information," he answered, and Severus perked up some. "You leave in one week." They had reached the stairs, Dumbledore shook his hand at the foot of it and headed upwards, while Severus turned to go back to his dungeons, his curiosity now sparked to see what exactly Dumbledore had in store for him.

With the promise of something to occupy his mind, he speedily made his way back to his dungeons, using as many shortcuts as he knew. Trying not to look at things that brought to mind memories, he flew down the stairs and hallway, then into his classroom. Once in, he shut the door behind himself, looked over his immaculate room, and strode over to his desk. There sat the packet in a plain folder, right next to his quill and grade book. Severus sat down in his chair and picked it up, beginning to leaf through it.

It was simple enough really. Dumbledore had compiled a list of reasons as to his suspicions against Cragburn, and certain evidences against him. It then had a fairly detailed character analysis of him, as well as an overview of his history and family's history. The next few pages were composed of the man's said 'usual habits' in the German town where he stayed in the summers, with a list of other places he has been seen. It then had a list of objectives to find about this man, and he had to complete as many as possible without being suspected. To Severus' satisfaction, some of these objectives were actually a challenge, and he began to organize ways of obtaining the information needed. Usually he could get the information from the people around him without actually coming into contact with the person or raiding their apartment, but some of these would be trickier. Before he started giving thought to his tactics, he took a trip to the library and checked out a few books to get ideas out of, and a few to trace back Cragburn's family history. He wanted a better idea of the man, besides what he knew from the paper; it helped to grasp this man's motives.

From the book and the papers, it seemed Cragburn was born into the family mold. His father before him was prestigious and generous in donations, and held a high seat in the Ministry of Magic. During the reign of Voldemort, he was called into question on his loyalties to the Dark side, but was never convicted of anything solid. He climbed back through the ranks of society after that tainting period, and his accusations seemed to disappear from the memory of society. His son was raised in his father's footsteps, and took an interest in the school from his early adult years. He donated money to the school and promoted it as much as possible on his travels, and was considered a Light side advocate from the beginning. However, he was a secretive man, and though he participated in societal events, he never discussed personal undertakings. Through the years, and even after being elected to the school board, he kept to himself, though dark rumors were kept at bay through large donations.

Severus studied this information, reading the papers over and over in preparation for his trip. He was beginning to take notes on the subject, and was nearly finished with the book's given information when he realized that it was approaching noon. Absorbed in his new task, he decided to skip lunch and continue on with his work, neatly writing down everything that could help him in a well-organized manner.

He had nearly forgotten that he was to meet with Dumbledore's guest around this time, but was sharply reminded when a loud knock was heard from the door and reverberated around the room. Sighing and slightly annoyed at the disturbance, Severus called for the person to enter while he finished up his section. When Severus looked up shortly after the door was shut to see who it was, it was to his utmost displeasure to find that it was in fact Sirius Black.

"What are you doing here?" asked Severus coldly. "I'm expecting someone, go find someone else to exasperate."

"I would be the person you're expecting. Dumbledore sent me," Sirius answered. He looked better from when the last time he had been seen as a dog on the night of Hagrid's funeral. His face was less skeletal and his hair trimmed again, though he still looked like a vagrant to Severus.

Severus put down his quill slowly and glared. "On Dumbledore's behalf, I'm giving you half a minute to explain yourself, and then you may turn around and leave quietly."

"I've been to see Cassi," Sirius said in a dangerous tone.

"And your half a minute is up. _Out_!" Severus said sharply.

"I'm not leaving until I'm done talking, Snape, so you're going to listen to everything I've got to say," Sirius seethed furiously. "I went to see Cassi yesterday. I finally coaxed out of her why she was in Russia and not magically bound to your side-"

Severus leapt to his feet, his hair falling in his face with his quick movements. He pushed his hair out of his eyes quickly with one hand. "Black, I am _not_ jesting! Get-"

"But you know what?" Sirius said in an offhand voice now, his arms folded across his chest. "I don't suppose it much matters anymore. She's actually quite well situated there. She has a decent job, lives in a nice apartment, and is a lot happier than I've seen her with you-"

A fleeting look of shock crossed his face, replaced by burning anger. "If you want all your limbs intact I suggest you leave _immediately_!" 

"-And word on the street is that she's seeing the shop manager actually. I saw him, he seems well off, genial really. They seem to have hit it off fantastically. It's amazing what one can achieve in so little time." Sirius was still speaking in a cool manner, but his eyes bored into him with severity. There was a very tense pause as Severus looked at him with bewilderment mixed with fury.

"You are lying!" Severus hissed, pointing at Black with a long delicate finger. "You've no idea what you're saying!"

"Don't I?"

"God damn you Sirius Black! You're a liar!"

"I thought that's what you _wanted_ to hear, Severus Snape. I thought you wanted to hear that she was perfectly fine and had moved on magnificently. I thought you wanted to hear that she'd forgotten all about you and was making a better place for herself. Maybe it would make you feel less guilty about moving on if she did-"

Severus was irate at this point; having his hatred for Black mingled with his frustration with Cassi in one conversation did not work well with his temper. "You don't know what the hell you're meddling in!" he shouted, moving around to the side of his desk.

"I know it well enough. Cassi did not want to talk about a lot of it, and quite honestly I don't blame her, because from what I've figured out, it's not good. So what did you say to her in that classroom, Snape? She went deathly pale when I mentioned it, " he said, just as furiously as Snape had spoken, though with the grating confidence he was known for.

"This is none of your business, what happened between her and I STAYS that way!"

"Oh it is my business, it is. I _told_ you to take care of her, and you can't even do that. Is there someone else Snape? Was she not good enough for Your Majesty? Or were you just _bored_ with her? I've never seen you drop a girl so fast," Sirius said with a sneer, but he had barely gotten it out of his mouth before Severus threw a punch at him, connecting with Sirius' jaw. He stumbled backwards a step, then started forward and arrested Snape's collar, throwing him back. Severus lost his balanced, but grabbed onto Sirius' robes and pulled him down too, causing both of them to tumble to the ground hard, still fighting to silence the other. "Come now Severus, surely I didn't step on your feelings, you haven't any!" he taunted.

Severus grabbed onto Sirius' robes with both fists and held him down, his eyes glittering with anger and his mind racing. "I love her, Black. I love her more than you'll ever love anyone, or anyone will _ever _love you. Don't so much as _insinuate_ that I felt anything less or the Headmaster will find himself one spy short."

"Then why the hell did you let her go?" he said, dropping the cruel tones and pushing Severus' grip away to sit up.

"She wanted to go, and I didn't blame her for wanting to go. Now I don't want to talk about this anymore," he said sternly.

"No, we're finishing this," Sirius said, and grabbed his sleeve and jerked him back down when Severus tried to stand. He shoved Severus violently and Severus shoved back, but before he could punch him again, Sirius struck him on the cheekbone with his fist. Severus' retaliation was to knock Sirius on the side of his head so he would fall over, but Sirius ducked it and dove at Severus, pinning him to the ground. "Do you want to know the truth, hmm? The truth about how Cassi really lives?"

Severus just glared, but Sirius took his silence for assent.

"Cassi lives in a short-lease apartment for both Muggles and wizards. In order for her to get to the magical floor, she walks up _four_ flights of stairs. Her rent is cheap, and for a good reason, because I can't say when I've seen a worse building. However, it's near her shop, where she works as a _Muggle_ for barely enough money to pay rent and eat, though I really doubt if she does the latter. She insists she does, but I wonder; she's thin as a rail Severus, and she looks like she hasn't slept well in months, which is probably the truth. She doesn't want to talk about you, what happened, the baby, or herself. _She is wasting away from grief._" Sirius kept Severus pinned to the floor, but he hardly needed to by the end of his tale. Severus had sunk back and closed his eyes with a grimace, but when Sirius said his last few words, his eyes reopened as slits of anger.

"Why do you tell me these things? What makes you think I wanted to know that?" he shouted.

"So you're saying you don't care?"

"Just like a Black to put words in my mouth. No, I'm saying that I'm living in hell already, there's no need to twist the knife except for your own pleasure."

Sirius growled furiously and gave Severus another shove against the floor. "Why can't either of you accept the fact that you love each other? My God, I've never met a more perfect but difficult couple. Severus Snape, for once in your miserable, worthless life I am trying to help you by _not_ letting you screw this up. Normally, I would laugh at your misfortune because I do that really well, but this time is different. This is my payment to you for saving Harry; I'm going to beat some sense into that thick ugly skull of yours. Severus, she loves you, you are her air, and lately you've been suffocating her. You love her too and you know it, you think more of her footprint in the mud than you do of all your disturbing potions bottles and books. Why the hell are you throwing this out?"

Severus pushed him away roughly and sat up, leaning back on his hands. "I don't think you could understand-"

"I understand enough to know you're screwing this up. Yeah, she could have told you sooner, but it took enough nerve from her to say it at all. She was scared, just like you are-"

"I'm not-"

"Bullshit. Don't start that. Look, if I were you, I'd be begging her on bent knees to take me back and hoping to God she's more forgiving than I am of you. I wouldn't blame her if she wasn't, not one bit. But, then again, if I were in your position, I would have never let her leave. So here's what's going to happen: I'm going to leave now, and you're going to figure out a way get her back so I can be absolutely disgusted with your obvious infatuation with each other. Clear?"

Severus stood up stiffly, and did not say a word. Sirius did the same.

"This is my repayment, I don't like being in your debt. It bothers me greatly. And don't think I would have done this if it was some other girl; Cassi's special, and why the hell she's given you more than a second glance I'll never know. I'm leaving now, goodbye," said Sirius, and without another word, he swept out of the room. 

Severus touched his cheek and winced, then thought of something and bounded through the room and to his door, following Sirius stealthily as he climbed up the stairs. From the foot of the stair, he heard two voices above.

"Merlin's beard, I suppose he didn't take it well." That was Dumbledore.

"Oh, he'll be fine. He listened well enough."

"Haven't I told you for years upon years that you don't get people to listen to you if you beat them up?"

Sirius laughed. "He listens better when you're fighting him. Now if you don't mind Professor, I feel the need to go wash my hands… thoroughly. Unfortunately fighting involves physical contact…"

The voices faded down the hall, and Severus crossed his arms and stalked back to his room, sitting back at his desk and returning to his work, letting papers and notes consume him by day, and deep thoughts and dark dreams by night.

~

It appeared to Albus Dumbledore that Severus Snape had not taken Sirius' advice though, for the next few days were the same as the past weeks. Severus was seen only a few times, taking his meals in his rooms and occasionally slipping outside when he was sure no one was looking. Severus was worse than a shadow, for he was absent regardless of sun or clouds. The other teachers talked about him in piteous voices around the fire of the staff room, relaying to each other that they thought it would have worked out rather nicely if she had stayed, but her sudden flight seemed to dissolve any chance of her relations to Severus. Albus wasn't worried too much though, because he knew that Severus would come around in his own time, he always did. He was not sure, however, how this delay would affect the other person in this party.

It was on a bright Friday morning that Dumbledore decided to settle down with a cup of tea and a book and read a bit, taking a break from the numerous owls he had received letters from that morning. His tea was especially tasty, as it was mint tea, which he found quite soothing. The book was just something the library had received through a donation, so he picked it up to look at. He barely had time to enjoy his silence before he heard the gargoyle slide open down the hall, and running footsteps approach his door. He set down his tea on its saucer in expectation.

It was Severus who burst through the door, breathless and looking rather pale. "Albus," he panted in his most professional voice. "What is Cassi's address?"

Smiling, Dumbledore opened a drawer and handed him the slip of parchment Cassandra had given to him the day she left. "Is something wrong?" he asked, now trying not to smile.

"Yes, I've been foolish. Where's the Apparating safe point in Moscow?" he asked quickly.

Dumbledore pointed to a map on the wall, and Severus took a step, looked at it, and then shoved the paper into his pocket.

"You've three days until your mission, Severus."

"Exactly. I'll be back here in twelve days," he said hurriedly, then bound out of the room.

"Good luck," Dumbledore whispered to the door. "Love is a powerful thing, isn't it Fawkes?" The magnificent bird in the corner squawked. "Indeed…"

~

"Cassi! Chem ty seychas zanimaeshsya?"

__

"When? Tonight?" Cassi answered her co-worker, a small girl of about twenty who was folding clothes to put back on the shelf.

__

"Yes tonight. My friends and I are going to a club, want to come?" asked the girl.

__

"Me in a club? Oh please," she answered. _"Could you honestly see me in a club?"_

"It would be fun! And you might meet someone!" said the girl, walking over to Cassi's counter and begging her with clasped hands.

__

"Meet someone, ha. Maybe next week. Or year." Cassi grinned winningly, and the girl sighed. _"I'm taking my dinner break now, I'll see you in half an hour."_ Cassi hopped off her stool and waved, then bolted out the door. Turning to her first left, she walked down an alleyway, and ducked into a bookstore. The owner winked at her and then nodded to the back of the store, and she bowed her head and walked through a short hallway that repelled Muggles, then stepped through a door. The sun shone in its evening rays as she closed it behind her and looked down a small street.

It was the wizarding block of the city, though very small compared to the Muggle's territory. Most Russian witches and wizards lived out in the forest, not daring to come out after centuries of repression. However, the braver ones who moved to the city stayed in this area normally, totally Muggle-free and able to live out a peaceful life. Cassi came here from time to time to keep in contact with magical peoples, for she did not like the life of a Muggle. Today, she was going to try to eat a small dinner here, and enjoy being amongst magical people.

In her Muggle clothes of black pants and a white tank top, she felt out of place amongst the old traditional robes of the wizards around her, but knew they understood that some of the people in here made their living in Muggle jobs. Cassi skirted around the crowd of people in front of the narrow shops, and came to a small café about halfway down the street. 

She stepped into it and approached the counter, where the cashier took her order for a salad and a bottle of water. Once she had paid and received her food, she took a small table in the corner of the café and looked out the window as she ate, something of a habit she had now. Watching the people on the street was her pastime, for she was having her fun playing deduction games with them as they walked.

First she watched an elderly witch peer around the street, looking confused. She was obviously from the country, and only came to town a few times a year. Her family was an older wizarding family, for the bracelet the woman had on was not made this century, but several centuries ago, though very true to the Russian style of that era. Being as poor as the woman (told by the state of her robes) was, she would never be able to afford a bracelet like that. The woman liked Divinations, for her bag was from the fortune telling shop just down the way. Cassi gave her a harder look as she talked with a storeowner. The witch waved her hands in a small, impatient way and pulled herself to her full height as she spoke. Cassi returned to her food as she noted that the woman was proud too. 

Cassi looked up and watched another person. This was a teenage boy of about medium height who was strolling around, not looking at anything really except passing people. He was rather gangly for his height, with dark hair and brown eyes, but he walked with an air of confidence. She watched him interact with the people around him as he proudly nodded and smiled at everyone. There was something about him thought that made her uneasy… she realized what it was and dropped her eyes to her salad, concentrating on her food now. He walked proudly, as Severus did about the school. She bit her lip now and scowled at her food. Why did he always have to penetrate her thoughts? Why wasn't she over it by now?

With the month that followed her departure, Cassi had kept herself busy by getting herself settled, but come nightfall, she was forcibly reminded of the deep hole she felt in her heart without Severus. Hardening, she made herself stop thinking about him by telling herself sternly every night that she was a fool. Even still, she seemed to see him in people on the streets… one day a man would have his hands, another day one would set black eyes upon her, another would sneer at someone with his mouth, and so the list went on. As much as she had hidden herself, it seemed as if he was following her, sure to torment her to the end of her days, never letting her have the release she wanted or the peace she needed. A few days ago, Sirius had come to her, asking questions and seeming concerned, and though she appreciated his company, her bitterness was sealed as she felt that he was a strong reminder of everything she had wanted to forget; Hogwarts, Dumbledore, teaching, and above all, Severus. 

What she wouldn't give to forget how she wronged him! The guilt that she harbored inside herself grew and grew, eating away at her very soul, taking painful bites out of her peace of mind, to the point where she had to stop it lest it drive her to madness. She remembered a night when she turned her wand to her temple and attempted a Memory Charm on herself, but no wand will work against its master as she wanted it to. In her anger, she threw down her wand and stormed off to look up memory potions, but found none of them to be safe for her in her condition. Her frustration that night peaked, and she threw herself crying into bed, and had not shed a tear since that early July night. Since then, the memories of his frustrations while she hid the truth from him and his anger when he found out only came into her mind when she seemed in danger of being at ease, thus keeping her resentment constant.

She pushed all her regret, doubt, and fear out of her mind now, as it made her sick at the thought, and sick was not something she needed to be. Concentrating, she ate her salad quickly and finished off her water, throwing them away and standing up. She had a few minutes, so she could take her time walking back to the shop. Folding her arms, she started off down the alley towards the exit, walking slowly and looking around. Hoards of people milled around and jostled her, but she kept walking, seemingly untouched and untroubled by them, thinking hard to herself. 

When she reached the end of the alley, she took a step to the door, but was arrested by a firm grip on her arm. In half a second, she turned to the person who grabbed her and made a motion for her dagger (magically Concealed at her side), but the person grabbed her hand and pushed it away from her weapon, then held her still. She finally looked up at the person, and felt as if she was slapped in the face by what she saw.

Severus Snape had grabbed both her arms and was peering down at her with an unreadable expression. He looked completely haggard, for his hair was stringy and fell in his unshaven, thin face, and the dark circles under his eyes made his intense expression all the more powerful. His dull black eyes cast over her, and she thought she saw pain flicker in them. Cassi stopped struggling and stared up at him in total shock. A moment later, she composed herself and glared.

"Cassi," he said, somewhat hoarsely. "I've been looking for you."

"Well you've found me, now let me go so I can go back to work," she said, ice creeping into her voice.

"Cassi, I need to speak with you," he said, a strength coming back into his words.

"I think you and I've both said enough." She pulled herself out of his grip suddenly and walked to the door, but he followed her. Both walked through the door hurriedly, but rushed for different reasons.

"I did not say what I meant to say," he whispered to her as she walked down the hallway. She didn't reply until they were out of the empty bookstore and onto the pavement. Then, she turned on him in the shadowed alleyway.

"No but you meant what you said, Snape. Look, I don't know why you're here, but I've got a job to attend to and I'd appreciate it if you left me alone," she said harshly, and turned to leave.

"I'll be waiting for you when you're done then," he said with sincerity, catching up to her again as she strode out of the alleyway.

"No, you won't." She turned to him again, but he was gone. Looking around, she wondered if she had lost her mind and quickly raced back to her shop. Pushing open the glass door and hearing a bell jingle above it, she shook her head firmly and took her place behind the cash register. Just when she had put her a hand through her hair, her coworker called out to her from a nearby clothes rack.

__

"Hey Cassi? There was a guy who came around here looking for you," Sabina said, the young coworker who had asked her to the club earlier.

Cassi groaned. _"What did he look like?"_ she asked, knowing the answer already.

The girl stepped away from the rack and put a hand on her hip. _"Um, let's see. He was really tall, wore a black shirt and pants, kind of scruffy looking… he didn't seem really friendly. He came right in and asked for a Cassi Tolin or Talin in English so I had to ask him to speak slowly so I could understand, and then I said that the only Cassi I knew that spoke English was Cassi Ivanova, and he asked me to describe you. I said you were about my height, longish black hair, kept to yourself. He wanted to know where you were, I said I didn't know, you went wherever you pleased. He kind of growled and walked out. You've gotten awfully pale, Cassi, are you alright?" _she replied, making hand motions as she talked in a conversational way, then coming over to Cassi's post and patting her on the shoulder.

__

"Oh I'm fine," she said, nodding.

__

"So… he's your boyfriend?" Sabina asked carefully.

__

"Not at all."

"Ex?"

"Mm, you could say that I suppose. Yes." Cassi was aching and confused now, and really wished to leave and go home, but she still had two hours left for her shift. She rubbed her temple.

__

"He's not dangerous or anything, is he?" the girl asked.

__

"Him?" she laughed weakly. _"Only when he has to be." _Cassi smirked then took on a hardened blank expression but the girl gave her a weird look and shook her head.

__

"You've got strange tastes," Sabina said before she walked off to put clothes back on the rack. Cassi sighed.

She spent the next two hours in angry misery. The last thing she wanted to happen had happened, and it now consumed her. She didn't want Severus here, it hurt too much to look into his melancholy face and know what she had done and what he had said. She had thought that when July came and went with no word from him that she was surely out of contact with him permanently, and as the school year drew closer her chances of seeing him were less and less. But now he was here, and at what a strange time to come. The thought made Cassi rap her fingers on her counter in exasperation.

She worried about what he was doing here. If he had thought up more furious things to say, she would hear them with her stony silence and then send him on his way, for she deserved them. Another thought, one she had been suppressing for awhile now but could no longer successfully hide, occurred to her. What if he had come back to work out custody of their baby? The thought was too awful for her to endure, so she pushed it away, but that horrible creeping feeling seeped into her mind whenever she was trying to work. 

People filed up to her register and made their purchases, Cassi working very quietly and not very enthusiastically. Her movements were memorized and quick and her replies were dull. Very soon, she felt like some odd machine rather than an actual human but was rather envious of machines, for they felt nothing. 

It was with a embittered heart that Cassi locked the register up and left the shop when night had fallen, somewhat annoyed at the prospect of possibly running into him again. She halfway expected him to jump out and grab her for a second time, but nothing like that happened on her way home. As she walked to her nearby apartment, she kept throwing glances over her shoulder, peering back into empty dark sidewalks. Shaking her head and deeming herself paranoid, she continued along her short but familiar path home, finally reaching her old, slate gray building and pushing the door open. A narrow stairway was the first thing she saw upon entering the cramped lobby, but she started up it immediately, having quite a few flights of stairs to go before reaching her floor. The stairs were not a problem really, though she had often wondered how she was going to manage them in a few months time. Perhaps she would find somewhere to Apparate up to her floor, or some similar means. The winding stairs continued under her feet, until she saw the sign that indicated the fifth floor. Walking down a short hallway, she approached the man behind a counter, a nosy American who sat about, took rent, and only thought of Quidditch.

"Any messages?" she said in clear English. The balding man pointed down the hallway at her door, where there stood a dark figure. Snape was leaning on her doorframe and smirking.

"I figure he's got something for you. He wouldn't let me get rid of him," the man said gruffly.

"There are times when I wonder if you are a wizard or not, Mr. Day," she muttered, a troubled look crossing her face.

"You want me to get rid of him?" Day asked, puffing up and looking more like the overweight man that he was rather than the formidable man he wanted to be.

"You wouldn't be able to anyway, he might as well stay," she said, and she left the counter and walked to her room, pulling a key from her pocket and not looking at Severus.

"Cassi, do you get the Daily Prophet here?" Severus asked as she unlocked her door and stepped inside, now in a position to slam the door in his face.

The question caught her off her guard, so she stopped herself from doing so. "No, I don't want connection with English matters anymore."

He blinked once in surprise but acknowledgement of her desire to stay out of England's business. "You haven't heard anything about these Death Eater attacks then?" He was beginning to sound more official than compassionate as he spoke of politic happenings. She stared at him for a moment, leaning on her door. The dingy hallway lamp that hung over his head illuminated him like a glowing spirit framed in the scenery of a dilapidated building. She shook her head.

"No, but I'm not surprised, Death Eaters often attack people," she replied stiffly.

"No Cassi, there are attacks _on_ Death Eaters. Former Death Eaters. I see a few of them every week, it seems anti-Darkness feelings have been re-aimed at attainable targets; those who used to serve the Dark Lord but do not anymore," he said, now crossing his arms.

"You can take care of yourself," she coldly replied, and he raised an eyebrow. "Oh fine, I know you're meaning to look after me, but British problems always die out farther east, and no one besides our Defense group knows I was a Death Eater anyway." Her voice dropped considerably as she talked, for Mr. Day was leaning over his counter and looking at the two talking, Severus still leaning on the doorframe, and Cassi leaning in from behind her ajar door.

"This is what I came to talk to you about," he said, his volume lower too. "Pierre from our meetings has not been responding to letters from Dumbledore, and though sources say he's still home, it's been unsettling to our group. If he sells us out, people will know who you are."

Cassi blinked. "I wouldn't put it past him to sell us out. However, even if everyone in Britain returns to scorning my name and tainting my reputation, I'm still fine here in Russia."

Severus dug into his pocket and produced a neatly folded newspaper article. "Remember Madron Argos?"

"Yes, she was a snooty little thing," Cassi said, taking the paper from Snape and opening it to find a small box circled in red on it. She read it quickly. "Murdered and found under a bridge… mob… Latvia? What was she doing in Latvia?"

"Honestly, I've no clue, but as far as we could tell she had yet to go back to the Dark Lord. Anti-Death Eater feelings are very high at this point; people are feeling helpless," he said, taking the paper from her hand gently and tucking it back in her pocket.

"Alright, so I'll be careful," she said, holding his gaze firmly.

"You'll be more than careful," he said, dropping his voice again and reaching out to push a lock of hair behind her ear, then trace her jaw line with his fingertips. Cassi closed her eyes for the briefest of moments, then opened them with her eyebrows raised, taking his hand down from her face and pushing it against him.

"Are Death Eater attacks the reason you're here?" she asked.

"No," he said cautiously. "… no. I've come here because I've been foolish and wrong, and I've lost something very valuable to me."

"What are you talking about?" she asked, in a voice barely above a whisper, trying to cling to her coldness.

He closed his eyes and dropped his head down some, allowing a bitter sneer at himself to spread across his face. "Oh, don't insult your intelligence. You. Your trust. Your respect. Your love. My own stupidity kept me from realizing I had these things until I had lost them. These past few months have been, well, agony, worsened by the thought that I could have prevented this from the beginning." He spoke with difficulty, pausing from time to time to collect himself.

There was a great silence as both thought over what was said. "It hasn't been all flowers and pixies here, but it's better this way. Better if we just stopped," she said, ending her sentence with shut eyes and a firm attitude, and closing the door. He put a hand on the door to stop it from shutting.

"No! I thought so too, but it's not that simple. Let me talk to you," he said quietly.

"I can't risk hurting you again…or getting hurt again, Snape," she said, her eyes widening at her own words. She looked away quickly, then slammed the door shut with a pronounced _bang_. The next sounds he heard were the click of a lock and the sliding sound of a chain.

"Don't call me that," he said to the door, and stepped back from it.

"Tough luck, man," said the man at the counter. Severus glared over at him, then sighed and leaned back against the opposite wall, sliding down it and sitting on the ground. He had almost had her when he touched her jaw; she would be tougher than he thought. 

Listening closely, he thought he heard a soft sound from behind her door. He leaned closer, and distinctly heard the soft sighs and gasps of her crying. Dejected, he leaned back against the wall and remained there all night, not daring to stray for fear that she would leave and he would have to track her again.

__

"Dammit! Leave me alone, I've told you enough times that you're not good enough, Severus! No!" she slapped him hard across his face and stormed out angrily, so all he could do was stand there.

Severus woke up abruptly from his dream, shaking his head hard and rubbing his eyes. Damn it all, he had to stop dreaming these things. He'd be half-insane by the time school started if he kept this up. Slowly, he pushed himself off the ground to stand and stretch out his muscles. He hated sleeping on the floor, it made his back ache. He paced around the hall to stretch out, then returned to sitting on the floor, waiting for her to come out. She had to, eventually.

Sure enough, half an hour later, she peeked out her door and spied Severus leaning against the wall with his legs crossed and his hands clasped in his lap, patiently waiting.

"Has Professor Severus Snape sunk so low that he slept in my hallway?" she asked, lifting an eyebrow and putting a hand on her hip.

"It appears to be so," he replied simply, looking up at her.

"So if I don't come out of my apartment all day…"

"I'll still be right here."

"And if I do go out…."

"I'll follow you."

Cassi rolled her eyes up to the ceiling with impatience. "I hardly need you sitting in front of my door, stalking me," she replied sternly.

"Then hear what I have to say," he said.

She growled to herself. "Maybe later. At least come in and eat something, I'll not be responsible for your starvation." She pushed her rickety door open and dramatically gestured for him to come, so he pushed himself away from the wall and stood again to walk into her apartment.

Black hadn't been exaggerating, the flat was small. When Severus came in, he found himself in a cramped living space. An old, threadbare sofa sat in front of a window and a chair was pulled up near it, looking just as old as the sofa. The walls seemed flimsy and were crumbling, and the floor was worn down in paths. One path led to a hallway on his immediate left, and another led to a kitchen with its door open on his right. She took the path to the kitchen and he followed to find a run-down but neatly kept kitchen. He looked around.

She pointed to a chair and looked at him sternly until he sat, and then set down his breakfast in front of him (which, he noticed, had been prepared just before she asked him in, and he noted this small victory with a quick smirk), which was entirely vegetarian, but still good enough for him. Cassi took her seat on the other side of the small, square table with her cup of tea and drank it quietly, glancing over at him from time to time.

About halfway through the meal, and without looking up at her, he said, "Your hair is longer."

She touched a few locks of hair that were falling out of a bun and around her face to hang at about her mid-back. "Yes, it's growing back quickly, but I might only let it get a bit longer… not as long as I had it. It was impractical."

"I never minded," he said lightly, and he ploughed on. "Yesterday, your eyes… they were blue, just blue. A charm I suppose?"

She smiled faintly. "Mmm hmm, Color Charm. It wears off by the end of the day, but it was too much of a bother having Muggles ask me where I got my contacts. Oh… erm, they are lenses Muggles put in their eyes instead of wearing glasses," she explained at his slightly confused look.

"I see," he said, and ate for a little bit. "So… you find pleasure in pretending to be a Muggle?"

Cassi stiffened and rapped her fingers on the table once. He knew she hated living like a Muggle, it was why she left Russia in the first place. "It puts food on the table."

"I see…. So why aren't you eating?"

Cassi flushed and looked down at her tea. "Morning sickness," she answered shortly. "I'm not too bad around people eating, but I can't eat anything myself, not until lunch."

"For all this time? You know there are potions out there to help you-"

"I don't trust them," she said, ending the conversation abruptly, as though she'd rather not talk about such things with him.

There was a tapping at the kitchen window. Cassi stood up and unlocked the window for a brown owl to hop in, then flutter over to Severus. It offered its leg out to him so he could remove the rolled up newspaper and drop a few Knuts in its pouch. Once it had done its duty, it hooted once in a dignified manner, then flew out the window. Cassi peered at the paper briefly, then shut the window and returned to her seat, picking up her tea. Severus, having an idea, unrolled it and set it on the table flat so she could read the headlines upside down.

She curiously peeked over at the paper every now and then, and Severus smirked. He rest his jaw on his fist and pretended to read the headlines, glancing up at her a few times until he finally caught her eye and she looked away, angered.

"Do you want to read it?" he asked with fake politeness.

"Are you mocking me, Professor Severus R. Snape?" she said, echoing his sly tone. "What _does_ the R stand for?"

Gruffly, he replied, "It doesn't matter." Knowing she had won this battle, he set the newspaper more in front of him. "Oh look, Rita's been writing again…"

"Who?" she asked, suddenly impatient.

"She used to write rather eloquent articles about your beloved Potter boy. I found them rather enjoyable… who's the target today? Ah, Fudge! Wonderful," he said, and settled back to read the article. She watched him, somewhere between angry and curious.

"Well I'd simply _love_ to watch you read the newspaper all day," she said, and he made a small derisive noise that seemed to say 'probably' which made her eyes narrow, "but I've got to go to work. Alone." She stood up and put her cup in the sink, then walked out of the kitchen. With a fixed smirk on his face, he mimicked her movements with his plate, then caught up to her as she left the room, locking the door behind her with her wand.

Immediately, she turned around upon locking the door to say something to Severus, but found him to be a little closer than she thought… close enough for her to kiss him. Both stared at each other for awhile, Cassi's hand still absently on the doorknob, and his hand on the door, suspiciously near her waist. After a collective tense moment, she turned away from him and started down the hall. Severus lingered back, watching her with interest as she put her hand through her hair and started down the stairs. She may have won the battle, but he _would_ win this war. He passed the counter with the loud American sitting at it, and began down the stairs after her. He caught up with her in no time, for her shorter legs were no match for his long ones.

"If I didn't know any better," he said once they had reached the base of the stairs, "I'd say you were purposefully trying to lose me."

"Hmm, wonder why I'd want to do that to a man that's been following me for a day," she retorted dryly, marching out of the building. Severus followed.

"Running from me?" he said. "I certainly didn't think my frightening anti-social powers were strong enough to penetrate your anti-Severus ones."

"Make your jokes now Snape, you won't have the heart to after sleeping out in the hall for however long you've decided to torment me," she replied, walking briskly down the sidewalk towards her work building.

"I'll be gone tomorrow morning," he replied in a much more serious tone. She slowed down some. "And stop calling me Snape! We established last December that my name was Severus."

"Why? It might as well be Snape to me!" she hissed bitterly, and he looked away.

"That's what I mean to talk to you about," he said.

"Forget it, Snape!" she said, finally showing a bitter anger instead of an icy one. She stopped walking and faced him. "You said what you needed to, I understand. I got the message. Do you think it's easy for me to see you come back after all this time, especially after what we've said and done? We had our words then. It's over! I-I'm glad you're leaving tomorrow, you're mad, an absolute nutter!" People who passed by looked at her strangely because she was ranting in English, but Cassi neither noticed nor cared. A light shade of pink crept over the bridge of her nose and onto her cheeks. To her surprise, Severus smirked, then gently grabbed her arm and pulled her off to one side to the entrance of an alleyway.

"Cassi, I've spent months upon months with you," he said in a lowered voice. "Don't you think I might have a slight bit of insight into your mind? I know perfectly well what you're doing."

"How could you? You're not reading my mind, I hope," she said, looking at him suspiciously.

"No, there's no need for that. You're pushing yourself away from me because you decided a long time ago that's how you would protect yourself. Don't think your icy demeanor fools me, it's just your self-will commanding you. I would think you're also quite a bit confused between your desire to slap me across the face for what I've put you through and your desire to throw your arms around me and forget these past months happened. It just so happens that you don't want to do either of the latter because you're afraid to hurt me, but I'm just curious as to which you do first," he said, reading off her innermost thoughts in an amused tone. She stared at him blankly.

"Take a guess," she said before slapping him hard, leaving a tingling red handprint on his cheek. He rubbed it remotely, still smirking though, and watching her run off.

Ultimately, he was quite pleased with this morning's progress. Not only had he made her snap out of her cold shell, but judging from a brief look of terror on her face, he had correctly deduced her emotions. 

He spent the rest of the morning wandering the streets, looking at the industrial yet impressive town. It was a blend of both old and new, as if it couldn't quite make up its mind as to whether it was an old town of palaces and royalty, or a new city of work and advancements. As much as he didn't care for Muggles, he found the city interesting enough. His thoughts were never really on the architecture or colors though, they remained solely on Cassandra. After months of pushing her out of his head, ignoring her situation and denying her worth and meaning to him, he could now come to terms with what had happened and how both reacted.

The previous day's morning, when Severus was at Hogwarts, things had begun evolving in his mind. He had awoken early not because of a dream, but what seemed more like a realization that had startled him from sleep. As if someone had poured ice water on him, he had shot out of bed and began examining the thoughts that screamed in his head. _You stupid git!_ they said. _You let her get away! You need her! And you call yourself a professor and deem yourself smart when you can't see that you're both hopelessly devoted? _A memory occurred to him at that time… directly after the last Defense meeting, he had felt something while looking at her that he hadn't experienced that powerfully before, and therefore repressed it. Now it was quite evident as to what it was… devotion. Pure, undeniable, everlasting devotion. 

The only thing he could think about from that time forth was what he could possibly say to bring her back, but decided he would figure out something when he got there. And now he was here, and he wasn't sure what to say. He had less than twenty-four hours to make her see it his way before he left… he supposed he could come back the week he had between the mission and school, but she would have hardened herself against all of his attempts by then. For the first time since arriving here, he worried that despite his correct prediction of her feelings, her iron-cast willpower wouldn't allow her to return to him. He dismissed the thought, now was not the time to be insecure. Between the both of them, they had enough insecurities to dissolve five relationships.

He stood as a clock struck noon, and walked his way back towards her shop. He hadn't strayed far, only enough to find a park bench to sit and think at. With his excellent sense of direction, he worked his way backward towards her shop, and stopped just across the street, looking though the window. Cassi wasn't inside. He looked around, then crossed the street and pushed the shop door open.

"Is Cassi here?" he said clearly to the young girl he had come across the other day.

"She said for me to tell you that she was going somewhere for lunch that you wouldn't find her," the girl replied.

"How convenient," he murmured. "You wouldn't happen to know where this place is, would you?"

"Nyet," the girl answered. Severus stood there for a moment, then turned to go. "You know, you really upset her this morning."

"Did I?" he said, looking slightly uncomfortable about talking to a Muggle girl about this.

"Yeah, she was all shaking and talking to herself. I told it's not good to talk to herself. I think she either really likes you or really hates you," said the girl.

"We'll see," he said, then semi-bowed and left the store. The girl shook her head and continued folding clothes.

Severus decided to give Cassi a bit of time to herself, so he walked up to her apartment and resumed his station at her door, waiting for her to come home.

~

Severus waited a very long time in front of that door. The landlord bothered him from time to time with impertinent questions, but eventually became disinterested and went back to his magazine. By the time Severus heard her step on the stairs, it was well past the dinner hour and night had almost completely cast its dark spell over the sky. He stood up at the sound of her echoing footsteps, and waited for her patiently. She appeared at the top of the stairs looking tired and downtrodden, and for a moment, he felt his heart sink with the pain he was causing her.

He tried to say something, but she looked away from him and wordlessly unlocked her apartment, then shut the door behind herself. He exhaled loudly and settled back to the floor, listening.

For a long time, there was silence from behind her door. Then, after about an hour, he heard her footstep across the worn out floor, pacing back and forth, back and forth. She was debating something, he knew, and waited hopefully outside, his legs crossed Indian-style and his hand on his knees.

"She ain't gonna let you in, mate," Mr. Day called out from his counter.

"This doesn't concern you," he snapped, but worried all the same. He returned to listening to her steady paces across the floor. Step step step step step, pause, turn, step step step step step… The rhythmic beat made his senses dull and his eyelids droop slightly as he leaned his head against the wall. Just as half-formed dreams began to arise in his mind, there was a stop in the pacing, and he brought himself around to the awakened state.

The doorknob rattled and he saw her lovely eyes peer out at him from behind the chained door as it opened slightly. She then shut it again, removed the chain with a grinding sound, and opened the door fully. The landlord leaned over his creaky counter to look at them.

"Come in," she said briskly, and left the door open while she walked further inside. He stood up, aching somewhat, and entered into her rooms, shutting the door behind him. There was a distinct "Hmph" when the door was shut, for the landlord could not poke his nose into their business now.

A light on the ceiling dimly lit the living room, casting odd shadows around the furniture. The blinds were shut behind the sofa, where Cassi gestured for Severus to sit. She took up the armchair next to the sofa, sitting sideways in it to rest her back against one arm, and swing her legs over the other, facing Severus. Snape sat forward on the sofa, hands clasped thoughtfully and elbows supported by his knees so his hands were held near his mouth. Dimly, he noticed that a thumbed-through newspaper sat at the other end of the sofa, the _Daily Prophet_, but he didn't allow himself any victorious pleasure.

"Alright," she said finally after a moment of silence. "I'm going to ask some questions, you can answer them, say what you like, and it will be done." Her note was a steely one.

He nodded once in agreement. There was another pause.

"My first question is why did you think I was cheating on you?" She crossed her arms over her chest, though her face was blank.

"Things changed very quickly for us, you see. In the space of a week, we went from unbreakable to non-existent. I did not know what was happening, I was rather shut out from this entire ordeal. And, I suppose, by having certain… _insecurities_, I was inclined to believe that the mysterious charm that kept you close to me had been broken, and you had finally seen sense. There were little things too, like your eye contact, the early morning walks, the man at Hogsmeade-"

"My brother," she said sharply.

"Yes, I see that now. It was foolish of me, but given all I had witnessed, it was the only thing that fit the facts and my slanted point of view," he finished calmly. He was speaking slowly and smoothly, almost downcast. She was giving him a skeptical look that seemed to wonder if he was on Calming Concoctions.

"Fair enough," she said, sitting quietly. "Why didn't you object to my behavior more than that one time? Didn't you see how close I was to telling you?"

"It didn't seem that way to me. It doesn't seem worth the fight if you've already irrevocably lost something," he said with difficulty. He was finding it a little hard to admit these things without knowing whether it would help. "When ah, when you were saying you weren't in your right mind, I knew of course than the chemical imbalances might lead you to act the way you did, but I was too… shocked to respond correctly."

She seemed to sigh and give a little in her cold manner. "No, you were right to act as you did. I should have told you much sooner."

Severus made a quietly derisive sound. "Would I have responded any differently? It's doubtful. I would have been just as shocked at the two-week mark as I was at the two-month mark. I would have ranted and raved anyway, so I suppose your fear of telling me was not unfounded and without basis."

"Yes, you seemed rather quick to disown our child," Cassi replied, a chill taking over her voice.

"It was simply hard to believe after knowing that the possibility of, err, having a family was lost quite some years ago," he said with some difficulty. "And honestly, can you imagine sneering, smirking Professor Severus Snape, Potions Master of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry really being a sufficient father?"

"You would have been an excellent father," she said, the emphasis on the 'would have' rather biting.

"I would still like that opportunity," he said after some time had passed. "I was never in opposition to being a father, I was… it's rather difficult imagining that I would do it _well_. Better than my father, at any rate."

Cassi simply shook her head and looked off at the ceiling with something between a smirk and a sad smile on her face. "You don't know how to fail at anything even if you tried."

"I seem to have failed at this. Rather miserably in fact, wouldn't you agree?" he said, gesturing with an elegant motion between the two of them.

"You're taking this all rather calmly," she said, slightly tart and quick to change the subject.

"So are you, though," he replied, finally sitting back on the sofa and putting an elbow on the arm of the couch, resting the side of his jaw on his fist. "No, I'm not under any sort of potion or spell, before you ask. I've just had quite a deal of time to think this over."

"And where does the professor find the time to think of such things?"

"I'm a diligent worker," he said with a trace of pride. "What needs to be done gets done."

"And am I the last check on the agenda before school starts?" she asked, and he threw her a questioning glance. 

There was a tense moment. "No Cassi. My agenda is things like reorganizing potions bottles or make lesson plans in advance. I've been doing these small tasks all summer trying to keep myself busy in hopes that I could… bury myself in my work, I suppose. You're not a numbered item with a checkbox next to it, I'm not going to attempt to check you off." He seemed rather firm in this statement.

She had no reply, but rather looked at the floor intensely, face unreadable and blank.

To fill the silence, he asked in a rather curious tone, "So then, what have you been doing?"

"Working," she replied shortly. "There's not much else to do, really. The only visitor I've had was Sirius."

"Ah him," Severus said with barely concealed dislike. Cassi shot him a look.

"Did you speak with him?"

"For a bit, a few days ago."

"Might that be why you're sporting a black eye?"

"It could be," he said, shifting a little.

"He didn't speak to you of me, did he?" she said sharply. "He better not have or else…"

"That's quite refreshing to hear," Severus said, smirking for the first time that evening. "We had a small discussion on a few points of his visit, and ah… his views on certain actions of mine."

"Oh stop glossing things over, I'm not a dimwitted third year," she said haughtily. "He probably came barging right along and spoke with his fists, _then_ his words. That's like him to, the hothead…"

Inwardly pleased at her insults, Severus continued on lightly. "I believe it was actually me who started the physical part of our conversation."

She lifted an eyebrow. "I'm almost impressed. Now, your allotted time is almost up. You said you're leaving tomorrow?"

"Yes," he said coolly. "Just before daybreak on mission for Dumbledore."

He thought he saw concern cross her face, but decided he must have been mistaken a moment later. "Why so close to the start of school?"

"He's off his guard, and the school board will need time to rearrange things. That's really all I can say for now," he answered. 

She nodded, then slipped out of the chair and stood stiffly. He sensed that she couldn't hear any more of what he had to say. "Well, good luck on that. We've said what had to be said, and now we can have peace of mind. Goodbye, Professor Snape," she said coldly. 

He nodded and took a step towards the door, then stopped and looked at her, bravely staring back at him through tired eyes. He approached her, and she tried to step back, but the chair blocked her way. Slowly so as not to alarm her, he placed both his hands just under the back of her jaw, bringing a severely confused look to her face.

"I will always be Severus Snape in your heart, my love," he said in the quietest of whispers, then kissed her forehead softly. She stood as still as a statue. Accepting defeat gracefully, he released her and strode out the door, shutting it behind him with eyes closed in remorse.

~*~

Severus waited in the dark alley for the right time to Apparate. He had already sent an owl to Dumbledore telling him he would go on as planned, and that he wouldn't be in contact for the next nine or so days. He would have a full report upon his return, and his devoted teaching skills would be at their best for the rest of the year, despite his summertime behavior.

Mornings in this city were cool, even for the summer months, and with the sun not yet peeking over the building tops, the place was nearly unrecognizable as the alley he had sought after the previous day for this purpose. Clouds had built over the city though, so no sun would shine today anyway. Despite the weather, the city had begun to hum with movement, but as Severus leaned against the brick wall, he felt remote and out of place. 

A rumble of thunder told him he was to be penalized further, and a few raindrops spattered here and there. He did not bother to put any sort of Repelling Charm over himself; he simply let it fall on and around him. Fairly soon, a steady flow of rain was pouring over his head, but he just leaned against the tall building and let himself become soaked. Apparating would dry him off anyway. He checked his pocket-watch; seven minutes to go. He crossed his arm across his chest, and bowed his head in thought.

Footsteps splashed along near his alleyway, but he didn't bother to look up. A bike's tires plashed through a puddle, a car zoomed quietly down the road. He was ready to leave this place. He checked his watch again; 4 minutes to go. He could see his reflection in the glass of his watch, and narrowed his eyes at his revolting dark features.

"Is Mr. Punctuality having troubles?" Cassi said as he stared at the face of his clock. He snapped it shut and placed it back in his pocket. Cassi was rigidly standing before him in her cloak to keep the rain off, and dewy drops clung at the material, collecting and rolling down her hood. Her eyes were their natural color, though they stared blankly at him, and her mouth was pressed into a firm line.

"Er, no. Just checking the time, I've four minutes until I leave. What ah, brings you here?" he said, bowing his head a little and looking at a not-so-fascinating puddle. He absently wondered if this was part of her punishment for what he put her through these last few days.

"I wanted to see you off," she said without missing a beat.

"How did you find me?"

"You're not so hard to track."

Severus did not really have a reply for this, so he nodded, then said, "You shouldn't have, you'll get yourself sick in this rain."

"I'm a big girl, I can take care of myself," she said, somewhat severely.

"So I see," he replied. "Well, be mindful all the same of things… we live in different times now."

"I know."

"Goodbye then, Ms. Talin," he replied with respect, and he wrung his hair out some with his hand as he straightened up to Apparate. It came as the biggest shock then when he seemed to blink and instinct told him not to open his eyes again, for a very gentle kiss was being administered to his lips. He felt numb; the only thing he felt was the warmth from her lips. He stood there as if made of stone, accepting the kiss with a blur of hardly understandable thoughts racing through his mind.

He blinked at her as she drew away, at a loss for words. She smiled slightly. "Don't you have to rush off now?" she said politely.

"I've… got a few minutes… left," he replied slowly, looking staggeringly confused.

"That's fortunate," she responded, and slipped her arms around him and kissed him again. He was a little better prepared for this one, and almost let it overtake him until he arrested her shoulders and pushed her gently back.

"No," he panted, and she looked at him curiously. "Don't do this if you don't mean it." He looked down at her now, mastering himself fully again. Rain trickled down his face and shoulders.

"I do mean it," she said, wrapping her arms around his neck, which he allowed with a little bit of caution. "Severus, I've never stopped loving you."

He exhaled as if a stress had been removed from his shoulders, and leaned his forehead against hers. "Then by all means, continue." She laughed and kissed him a third time, drawing him closer with a hand on the back of his neck. He finally encompassed her in his arms, holding her tight, losing himself in her taste. Slowly, everything was righted, and the last few months of hurt and misery melted away. When he could take the sweetness of it no more, he groaned and pushed her away again.

"Woman, take pity on this old man by _not tempting him directly before he leaves_!" he said, stroking her hair lightly.

"Alright Professor-"

"Severus. Say Severus."

"Alright, Severus," she whispered. "Your time is definitely up. I'll have you know that if you die in your stupidly noble fashion, I will find your body, resurrect you, and _kill_ you myself, got it?"

He smirked. "Yes, m'lady," he said, bowing slightly.

"Well then, go save the world," she said, pushing out of his arms. "Just come back here when you're done. We'll talk then."

He took her hands and pulled her close again, and whispered "I love you" in her ear before disappearing with a _pop. _She smiled sadly, then turned, walking out of the alley.

"That was close. He nearly made the same mistake twice… git," she whispered, now faintly grinning.

~

Well, there you have it. Review now!


	13. AN An Explanation

Gentle Readers,

I know. I know. I know. I haven't updated in forever and a half, but I do have my reasons. Not only am I in continual bad health, but school this year is…. mind-boggling. These, coupled with other life events, have led me away from my story. I am currently working on it, even as I write this ('tis on my taskbar), but I cannot say for certain when the next chapter will be up. I would much rather put out something satisfactory in a long time than something mediocre soon. I write at my own pace, as I feel the urge. Be patient, reader. 

I do have a mailing list, whom I email updates to whenever anything changes. If you'd like to join this, review and leave your addy, or leave a signed review. No problem to me at all. You could also email me at andromeda_night@hotmail.com and ask to be put on this list. I will then notify you when I put out chapters or encounter major delays. Thank you for your patience and your loyalty.

-Andromeda

And since I don't think we're technically allowed to have *just* A/Ns, I'm going to throw out a teasing hint at what is to come:

Cassi is uneasy about Severus, for he is several days overdue to come back to her. She has good reason to be, because the mission in Germany takes an unexpected turn.


End file.
